In the modern world of divorce, we are seeing that fathers are being left behind. Child separation from their parents, no matter if it’s the father or the mother, is traumatic. They will find themselves without one half of their guiding light and they will have a lesser view of the world because of it. Parents are supposed to be teachers and when children and parents don’t have the opportunity to spend time together, valuable lessons are not learned. Fathers are the hardest hit, as mothers tend to get sole child custody, 80-90% of the time. Let’s look deeper into why this is a problem that we need to talk more about.
Separation as a weapon
Sometimes, parents who have custody of the children will use this as a way to ‘get back’ at their former spouse. This is as horrible and vindictive as it sounds. However, this kind of child alienation can have a bad effect on the parent that is being forced out, and the children. The children will sense they are being used as pawns in your personal vendetta and the parent that is being kept from seeing them will grow distant from them. If you are also making up lies about the former spouse, or think that they are, your children will likely believe them as they are their sole caregiver. This kind of turning against tactics can be devastating in the long term to the point that relationships may never heal again.
A need for guidance
Both parents will give their children a guiding light in life. And when one of them is not there to do this, it can lead to a skewed view of the world. It’s rare for one parent to assume both roles and it can never really work even when they try. A dad’s perspective on life is different from the mother’s and vice versa. Therefore making sure that both parents can fulfill their role as a torch of knowledge in their children’s lives is vital. When one of them can’t do this because of child alienation by the other parent, this can be so harmful that the child will lack a certain type of life experience or knowledge that will end up hurting them more.
What can you do about it?
Can you sense not being able to see your children as you normally would at visiting times? Maybe you can’t even visit them anymore because of what the former spouse is doing to separate you from your children. You shouldn’t give up, even if the court has previously ruled something. You can use a good Family Law Firm to build a case that shows you are being unfairly treated and kept from your children. Fathers especially should look into this, as they will usually face a tougher stance from the family courts.
When it comes to divorce, the children must come first.
This is a collaborative post.