Story of my Life: Guest Margie Lakefield

Guest Margie Lakefield shares the trauma of Postpartum Psychosis in a multi series post. I read Margie’s post in tears, feeling empathy, above all I knew she was a strong woman. A woman who made tough decisions for the better of her children’s future.  Her story touched me deeply, I had to meet her. We worked together on the series. Unfortunately […]

Read More →

Vivid Memory #2 Guest Margie Lakefield

Vivid Memory #2 Continued WHERE IN HELL IS THAT FAMILY OF MINE? ARE THEY EATING PRIME RIB AND CELEBRATING? I’LL BET THEY ARE. THEY HAVE THE EASY PART IN ALL OF THIS. THEIR THEATER TICKET OFFERS A FREE DRINK AND REFRESHMENTS…while I stroll through hell… The little girl dances into my world after midnight. Drug free from day one, but moms chucking her insides out and there are four nurses pummeling me, explaining something about blood flow, placenta, oh hell, I don’t know the jest of it all! I was too busy loosing my insides, suffering a notorious headache and begging for water. … Now, the vivid memory. I am not sure how to write about it, other than to say that it belongs to my Megan. It belongs to her and I. Beginning early in the days before we even left the hospital, something was amiss. Sadly, I felt no maternal bliss, and I feared that I knew nothing. All those books I’d read on childbirth, the before and after. None of those had prepared me for the roller-coaster ride , the journey in to hell and the fear that would one day it would descend into thoughts of infanticide. I warn you. This is not an easy read, and although Megan is almost two thousand miles from me today, I would give anything to sit beside her and hold her hand as I attempt to answer her questions […]

Read More →

Story of my Life: Guest Margie Lakefield

Guest Margie Lakefield shares the trauma of Postpartum Psychosis in a multi series post. I read Margie’s post in tears, feeling empathy, above all I knew she was a strong woman. A woman who made tough decisions for the better of her children’s future.  Her story touched me deeply, I had to meet her. We worked together on the series. Unfortunately Margie had a family emergency and can’t be with us. She is dedicated to sharing her story at the cost of lingering pain. Margie takes us thru the arrival at hospital until the moment she reached out for help. The Series will post starting next Monday and consecutive Mondays. Margie’s participation in the app is dear to her heart. She encourages everyone to download the app, get familiar with the resources available and the DNA initiative.  Hope for the Helpless suffering from Post Postpartum Depression. The pactforthecure app is a new initiative. Available at App Store. Giving Hope for the Helpless Suffering PPD • March 28, 2016 • Thank you to the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill , for this initiative. I will forever be indebted to your servitude. This past week I noticed a story on CNN of an upcoming app that was to be released. I am submitting this after receiving an email today giving me permission to submit my article to the organization responsible for this International Study of Women Suffering/or have suffered from Postpartum  Depression, and/or, Psychosis. It […]

Read More →

Postpartum Psychosis by Guest Margie Lackfield

Postpartum depression accompanied by Psychosis This is not a war to win. It cages a soul and will not allow reason of any kind. I prayed, I begged and I pleaded. You can have me, but you cannot have my daughter. On this particular morning I thought I’d heard a knock at my front door, or was that coming from the back door? I trusted nothing. I sat in the nursery until the pounding stopped, and the sound of what I thought was my name being called, ended. Rocking my angel. I sobbed so violently. I wanted the voices and the visions to go away. I wanted nothing more than to save my baby from myself. Something made me pause. Was that the front lock-set being opened, the door flinging open, where those real voices? They found me. Jo and Prescilla. They found me, and they did not let go of me. One took the baby, the other took the phone directory. And every chance I get, I tell them, “Thank you.” I spent the following three and a half months in a locked Psych ward. … Each one of us has a story that shames us, it can trap us in a sort of hell, but sometimes to escape hell, we must find words to express its grievance. I used to think this would be one that I could not share for fear of losing someone whom I love(d). […]

Read More →