Helen Keller Friendship, Light, Friend, Alone, Better
Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.
Helen Keller Motivational, Confidence, Hope, Faith The best.
Most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched – they must be felt with the heart.
Helen Keller Inspirational
Beautiful, Heart, Best Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light
Espía digital
POR ABBY ROBINSON
28/01/2019
La nueva serie de comedia dramática británica Sex Education es un golpe inmediato, que pega a los estudiantes de la escuela secundaria Moordale y sus preocupaciones basadas en el sexo justo en frente de su cara sin previo aviso o disculpa.
Porque esto es un espectáculo en una misión: “[se trata de] animar a la gente a arrancar la venda de la ayuda y tener esas conversaciones incómodas, torpe sobre el sexo, en lugar de embotellar todo en el interior, o pensar que tienen que ir en línea para obtener las respuestas, ” escritor Laurie Nunn le dijo a Digital Spy y a otra prensa. “Para tratar de hablar con sus compañeros o-si pueden manejarlo-a sus padres, o a sus amigos.
“Realmente pensamos que eso les va a ayudar a tener relaciones sexuales más saludables. ”
Es un propósito noble y por eso, nada es sanitizado. Las preocupaciones que los personajes están lidiando están pintadas en los colores más ruidosos, enfáticamente salpicado a través de la pantalla porque, como el reparto y la tripulación tienen contras
“La primera campana de alarma que experimenté cuando vi que era la forma en que sugirió que el sexo y la terapia de relaciones era algo completamente dividido de la salud general de la gente y el bienestar mental, ” profesor Sarah Niblock, Director Ejecutivo del Reino Unido Consejo de psicoterapeutas, le dice a Digital Spy exclusivamente.
“Eso es un poco ridículo y que tipo de socava toda la premisa de lo que sigue. ”
A lo largo de la serie, los estudiantes de diferentes orígenes y Estados sociales se acercan a Otis (Asa Butterfield) para obtener ayuda con una serie de problemas extraños y maravillosos en relación con el sexo y sus cuerpos.
Otis entonces prepara sus perlas de sabiduría, al igual que su terapeuta de sexo y relaciones calificado madre Jean (Gillian Anderson) hace a sus clientes, y lejos van, instantáneamente más ligero, ya no empantanado por sus problemas pesados.
Al igual que Sherlock Holmes, Otis, de 16 años de edad, utiliza la evidencia antes que él para localizar el quid de sus acertijos y, en última instancia, conseguir que sus pacientes.
Netflix’s brand new British comedy-drama series Sex Education packs an immediate punch, sticking the students of Moordale Secondary School and their sex-based concerns right in front of your face without warning or apology.
Because this is a show on a mission: “[It’s about] encouraging people to rip the band-aid off and have those uncomfortable, awkward conversations about sex, rather than bottle it all up inside, or think that they have to go online to get the answers,” writer Laurie Nunn told Digital Spy and other press. “To try and talk to their partners or – if they can handle it – to their parents, or to their friends.
“We really think that that’s going to help them have healthier sexual relationships.”
It’s a noble purpose and because of that, nothing is sanitised. The concerns that the characters are grappling with are painted in the loudest colours, emphatically splashed across the screen because, as the cast and crew have consistently emphasised, Sex Education is nothing if not real.
It does the heavy lifting, having those all-important yet toe-curling dialogues – about relationships, identity, and what healthy, consensual sex looks like – that most of us swerved like Fast & Furious drivers during our younger years, and often still do.
Sex Education is just that: an education. (And we love it, by the way.)
But it could be accused of falling short in one central narrative tenet: the depiction of therapy.
“The first alarm bell I experienced when I watched it was the way it sort of suggested that sex and relationship therapy was something completely split off from people’s overall health and mental well-being,” Professor Sarah Niblock, Chief Executive of the UK Council for Psychotherapists, tells Digital Spy exclusively.
“That’s kind of ridiculous and it sort of undermines the whole premise of what follows.”
Throughout the series, students from a number of different backgrounds and social statuses approach Otis (Asa Butterfield) for help with an array of weird and wonderful problems regarding sex and their bodies.
Otis then dishes out his pearls of wisdom, just as his qualified sex and relationship therapist mother Jean (Gillian Anderson) does to her clients, and away they go, instantly lighter, no longer bogged down by their weighty woes.
Like Sherlock Holmes, 16-year-old Otis uses the evidence before him to pinpoint the crux of their conundrums and ultimately, get his patients instantly back on track.
This, according to Niblock, is simply not how it works.
“I’m actually a little bit surprised it survived the script editing,” she said. “Problems in relationships occur because of deeper stuff. It’s not something that you can split off from the rest of your life.
“Often if people have a general sense of ‘mental un-health’ then it does get manifested through relationship difficulties. Problems in relationships, particularly around sex, often come about as a result of something that’s much more fundamental.
“So I think the way it compartmentalises sex and relationships as being something that’s just there and everything else in your life is great, but you’ve got this sexual problem, is very simplistic.”
The way in which Otis is able to address the hang-ups of his fellow students during a five-minute lunch slot is also a concern for Niblock.
“I think it’s also a little bit unrealistic in the way that it portrays quick fixes,” she continues. “That’s not to say for one moment that you have to go into psychotherapy for years and years. Things can resolve themselves pretty quickly.
“But you can’t just sort it out overnight. You’ve got to be prepared to be in it for a bit of time to really get to the root cause of what’s causing those problems in relationships.
“I’m concerned that viewers might take away a distorted view of therapy. My worry is that programmes such as Sex Education are going to make people think that when they see a psychotherapist, that they’re in an unsafe relationship with somebody who might not necessarily have the proper background.”
It’s not just Otis’s age and lack of life experience that is a problem for Niblock and her fellow professionals. It is also the way in which his friend Maeve (Emma Mackey) crowns him an expert for simply observing his mother in action from afar: “The programme makes out that anyone can just learn the skills and practise it.
“You have to have years and years of training and deep study and deep reflection to learn the ability to work with what are people’s most unconscious feelings and experiences, so that concerns me.”
Portraying therapy in an accurate, responsible light is no mean feat, but it’s something that Niblock says can be done with a comprehensive understanding of the process, and of the relationship between therapist and client.
Unfortunately that doesn’t quite fit with the demands of fast-moving narrative TV. “It doesn’t follow a nice kind of flow. It doesn’t follow a linear pattern where you go from A to B and then you’re better. It often goes backwards and forwards. There are highs and lows. But people don’t really know what goes on. It has a lot of mystique around it.”
Niblock cited Scandinavian thriller Black Lake and Dexter as two other shows which get it spectacularly wrong: “In Black Lake, there is the representation of a psychotherapist as somehow being able to have control over their clients, that somehow they can manipulate them.
“I think if they worked with us they’d realise actually that it’s the client or clients that are in the driving seat. It’s they who have full control over the process, and the therapist is there really to support them and hear them and… ask them questions, get deeper into things and reflect back to them.
“They can’t start twisting their mind and control them or turn them into murderers as you saw on Dexter with Charlotte Rampling’s character. If you’re a writer or producer, you should go and immerse yourself within the particular sector.
“You can’t really shadow a psychotherapist, but you would be able to get a much better sense of it if only they were to talk to us and organisations like ours who would be more than happy to advise and give a little bit of script advice.”
Yet despite therapy often being a very emotionally demanding experience, representations on screen can play with comedic elements.
“We do look at humour in the consulting room because actually therapists and their clients will find times when actually, something is extremely funny,” she said. “It covers the full spectrum of emotions.
“But it’s just important that the power relationship between the therapist and the client is represented accurately. There’s nothing more frightening than thinking someone will overpower you and control you.
“The most scary thing we face is lack of control. It’s one of the most stressful, anxiety-inducing things, the sense that you can’t change your circumstances. And what concerns me with some of these programmes is they almost portray psychotherapy as being able to make people go mad and lose sense of who they are.”
Niblock went on to say that if that stigma isn’t dealt with, the fallout could be catastrophic: “So many of us will experience a mental health issue in our lives. The most important thing we can do is talk to somebody. We’ve done research that shows that people don’t really know what a psychotherapist is and when they see those representations on TV it will certainly put them off.
“So we’ve got to do a lot of work to make sure that people better understand and can make informed choices about their care.”
1734 Robert Morris, merchant (signed Declaration of Independence)
1865 Congress passes the 13th Amendment, abolishing slavery in America (passes 121-24)
1872 Zane Grey, American West novelist (Riders of the Purple Sage)
1925 Charles Aidman, American TV narrator (New Twilight Zone), born in Frankfort, Indiana
1949 ‘These Are My Children‘ is broadcast live on Chicago’s NBC station. It’s the first in what will become an institution of daytime drama serials, many of which will be sponsored by–yes–soap manufacturers. Television soap operas will begin dying out in the 21st century as tastes change.
BIRTHDAYS
Norman Mailer
(1923 – 2007)
Lisa Marie Presley
Turns 50
1927 Lorraine Warren, American paranormal investigator (Amityville haunting), born in Monroe, Connecticut
1933 Bernardo Provenzano, Mafia Boss (Cosa Nostra), born in Corleone, Sicily (d.2016)
1978 Brad Rutter, Jeopardy! champion, born in Lancaster, Pennsylvania
Ideas.Ted.com
Every weekday for the month of January, TED Ideas is publishing a new post in a series called “How to Be a Better Human,” containing a helpful piece of advice from a speaker in the TED community. To see all the posts, click here.
There are many things in our lives that we have little control over — the news, the weather, the traffic, the soup of the day at our local café. But among the things that we can control, there’s a big one: our story.
This narrative is not the one that contains the objective facts of our lives;
instead, it’s “the story you’ve been telling yourself about who you are and how everything always plays out,” says psychiatrist and Harvard Medical School professor John Sharp.
And he adds, “If you want to change your life, it needs a re-edit.”
The problem with this story is that too often, it’s not accurate — writer Marilynne Robinson calls it “a mean little myth.”
Sharp, the author of The Insight Cure: Change Your Story, Transform Your Life, explains, “Some emotionally difficult scenes are way over-included — just think of all the things you can’t let go of — and other scenes are deleted, such as times when things did go well. The worst part about the false truth … is that it becomes our self-fulfilling prophecy, the basis of what we expect from ourselves in the future.”
To begin revising your narrative, Sharp recommends doing the following:
For Sharp, his parents divorced when he was young, and he says, “the false truth that I held to so dearly was that just … as I couldn’t be effective in keeping my parents together, I probably couldn’t be effective at much of anything else, and this left me feeling very insecure.”
Since you’ve long accepted your false story as the official account, it may not be super-obvious to you. If you’re not sure what it is, try filling in these blanks, says Sharp:
“If I break a promise to myself, I feel ___________.”
“When someone ignores me, I feel _____________.”
“When my partner or best friend and I have a big fight, I feel _____________.”
Why these prompts? Our inaccurate narrative tends to be one that we default to when we’re faced with difficulty or disappointment.
Another way to help you identify your old story is to listen to your self-talk and notice when it includes statements that begin with “I always ______,” “I’m always ______,” or “I never ______.”
After you find your ingrained story, think back to your childhood and try to look for the experiences that helped feed it. And if you end up identifying multiple false stories, choose the one that’s had the most impact on your life. Sharp says, “While I know there are many stories and many possible revisions for all of us, I truly believe that there’s one underlying story that you deserve to identify and rework first.”
Let’s say your deep belief is no matter what you do, it’s not enough; perhaps your parents were rarely satisfied with your achievements, even when they were stellar, and fixated on your next report card, exam or accomplishment. So, ask yourself: While that might have been the case when you were younger, is itreally true now that what you do is never enough?
“When you view it from an adult perspective, you can see that it’s not fair or just to ourselves,” says Sharp.
Your story doesn’t have to have been caused by your parents, but it’s typically the result of a relationship we had when we were young. Explains Sharp, “It happens at a time before we know the difference between a healthy and and unhealthy reaction to something that really scares us, so we hold on to the wrong conclusion.”
It’s normal to feel a bit discouraged when you realize how long you’ve been telling yourself a false narrative. But know you’re far from alone — many of us walk around with these stories, says Sharp. “We need to be compassionate with ourselves about how this came into being.” Most people come up with them for what he calls “understable reasons” — the need to maintain a sense of control and the tendency for kids to take specific circumstances and generalize broadly.
Think about all your strengths and talents, and appreciate them. While the situations that led to the false story have made you into who you are today, they’ve probably affected you in positive ways as well. Maybe they’ve made you more resourceful, more responsible, more empathic, or more ambitious. These positives, big and small, deserve a place in your story, too.
“Cut away what no longer serves you,” says Sharp. “Identify and gather up all the many exceptions … and accept that it’s safe now to move on. You no longer have to hold on to that false security.”
One of Sharp’s patients was a woman who avoided all challenges and adversity. Upon reflecting about her past, she realized “she suffered from the false truth that when she fell, she couldn’t pick herself up,” says Sharp. “Now she knows she can, and her future looks entirely different and better.”
Sharp is a fervent believer in the power of editing one’s story. “If I hadn’t cut away from my ‘mean little myth,’ then I’m confident now that I wouldn’t be here with you today,” he says in his TEDx talk. “In my 20 years of clinical practice, I’ve seen this kind of transformation over and over again.”
Watch his TEDxBeaconStreet talk here:
Traído a usted por la ciudad médica plano de las mujeres
Si su hija se aproxima a la pubertad, tiene una tarea importante por delante. Cuanto mejor la preparó para los próximos cambios biológicos, más fácil será su transición a la feminidad.
Las madres e hijas juntos pueden aprender sobre los aspectos biológicos, médicos y prácticos del estilo de vida de la menstruación de un obstetra/GINECÓLOGO en el personal del centro médico de plano.
Estamos blogueando desde todos los rincones del mundo, tal vez un hospital o centro médico cerca de usted tiene información similar. Siempre se puede iniciar un grupo para educar a las niñas en áreas más pequeñas. Si tienes suerte, tu madre te da un buen ejemplo de lo que puedes esperar y abrazar los cambios. M
To say that kids can be cruel is an understatement, and the impact is has on the recipient can be painfully damaging to say the least. Having a stoma can be hard for anyone. I can only imagine what it’s like for a child. 10 year old Steven Bridges in Kentucky hanged himself. He went […]
Brought to you by Medical City Women’s Plano
If your daughter is approaching puberty you have an important task ahead. The better prepared her for the upcoming biological changes, the easier her transition to womanhood will be.
Mothers and daughters together can learn about the biological, medical and practical lifestyle aspects of menstruation from an OB/GYN on Staff at Medical Center of Plano.
We are blogging from every corner of the world, maybe a hospital or medical center near you has similar information. You could always start a group to educate girls in smaller areas. If lucky you’re mother set a good example of what to expect and embrace the changes. M
Thanks for sharing the words of wisdom. Have a great day.
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I’m sitting at a busy lunch table full of sixth graders. There is energy you can’t put your finger on and a deafening hum that continues from the first lunch all the way to the last. All 150 students are engaged in the same activity at the same time: communicating. With each word expressed in this lunchroom, lessons are being learned that will be filed away and used the next time there is a similar social situation. Sound confusing and overwhelming to keep up with? Just ask one of these sixth graders, and they will tell you that it absolutely is!
Teachers in middle school will often comment that being with their students from one day to another is like playing tug-of-war. For every day a student makes progress, the next day he or she might fall behind, have a behavioral slip-up, and/or refuse to work. Parents might say they have never seen their children so sullen at times, and they miss the carefree nature of their son or daughter. However, these things only mean that adolescents are acting appropriately for their age.
Middle schoolers are constantly making big connections, which lead to big lessons. These students will leave the lunchroom and continue communicating their way through endless life lessons until they can stand on their own two feet and approach independence. It’s going to be rocky at times, but if students can pick up the right tools along the way, they will be able to face challenges and overcome obstacles with ease. Luckily, they have supportive adults to help them learn how to navigate through struggle and resolve conflicts throughout these tumultuous years!
Conflict and a Changing Mind
Because middle school students are fighting for their place in adulthood, they need to have a lot of practice with properly resolving conflict. This not only smooths out the edges of their communication, but it also gives them plenty of practice to work out issues within themselves. In elementary school, it was more socially acceptable to react emotionally to express dissatisfaction. In leaving the uninhibited freedom of childhood, adolescents are entering a whole new set of social standards to live by. The desire to fit in grows stronger, and they have to learn how to do so while retaining their true selves.
Positive conflict resolution helps the adolescent join the old self and the new self. Conflict resolution skills are essential to gaining empathy, learning to get along with others, and seeing that one can overcome obstacles peacefully. Every time a student is involved in conflict resolution, a piece of her or his expanding life puzzle is put into place, and the adolescent gets closer to achieving stability. Middle school students’ behavior is mainly driven by inner conflicts and simultaneous battles with peers and society. Conflict resolution doesn’t just occur between two people; it occurs between one preteen and the world. (Okay, that might be a little dramatic, but hey, when in Rome!)
Embrace the Rebellion
Ever met an adult who didn’t go through an animal-rights or antiestablishment phase? From protesting processed foods to boycotting certain brands of makeup, adolescents question what was previously accepted and make room for reformed opinions. This often comes to the counselor’s office with students who are taking a stand against a friend. To an adult, quarreling adolescents might look as if they are fighting over nothing, but these fights are often part of students’ changing belief systems. At home, rebellion might happen in the form of a student who refuses to do homework because she or he would rather play video games. In other words, conflict between what the student should do and what the student wants to do. In each of these conflicts, students can benefit from learning how to find common ground with others and how to think through consequences.
The Arguing Is Good
Think of the verbal and nonverbal communication you used with your parents when you were in middle school. The eye rolls, the groans, the disgusted facial cues, oh my! These hallmarks of adolescent communication might make us adults rip out our hair, but they are actually healthy signs that students are searching for an identity that is separate from that of their parents. By constantly questioning and exploring the world around them, they are making cognitive, personhood, moral, and social connections. As this happens with authority figures, ever-shifting friendships, environment, and peers, students can learn healthy ways to embrace change and accept others.
Working Through the Turmoil
Perspective is by far one of the greatest things anyone can learn from conflict. Students who are in a social conflict gain empathy by trying to see things from another person’s point of view. I always remind students that understanding someone else’s perception of something is not admitting defeat or excusing what they have done to you. Switching perspectives is simply taking a step back and closely evaluating where some lines of communication may have been crossed or misconstrued.
How can educators and parents best provide an environment that will help adolescents through this rough time? Give students space to work things out on their own. Provide a safe space and a compassionate mirror for them to view themselves through. Once a resolution has been reached, walk back through what worked to reinforce the lesson learned. Common conflict resolution steps are stating your experience, listening to the experience of others, finding middle ground, and making commitments to aid future behaviors. By breaking down the steps with students, you can teach them to take a step back and view the situation through a more inclusive lens.
Know When There Are Other Things in the Mix
While conflict is a natural part of adolescence, strong defiant behaviors might also be a window into more serious troubles that are brewing. Though it is natural for a young student to battle for autonomy, overly argumentative behavior might mean an adolescent is struggling with a deeper loss of control. It’s here that a counselor might ask pointed questions to elicit some information and see if there is another layer to the frustration. My go-tos are:
Frustration and rebellion are a natural part of adolescent changes, but it is important to also gauge when students are crying out for help in a situation that is beyond their ability to tackle. Resolving conflict breeds resilience and culminates in healthy individuals who can handle obstacles and work peacefully with their environment. While developing these skills, adolescents will experience failures but will also find surprising and rewarding successes.
Stephanie Filio is a middle school counselor in Virginia Beach. She received her undergraduate degree in interdisciplinary studies from the University of Virginia and her M.Ed. in counseling from Old Dominion University. In a discussion with one of her UVA professors about her desire to stay in school forever, her mentor wisely responded, “If you want to be a lifelong learner, go into education,” and so she found her place. Prior to her six years as a school counselor, Stephanie worked in private education, specializing in standardized tests, test preparation, and future planning. She writes about her career and hobbies at her blog,Weekend Therapy, and can be found on Twitter @steffschoolcoun. Stephanie also enjoys spending time with her books, crafts, and family.
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