Month: May 2022
Updated Suicide, What’s Left Behind?
As we wrap up Mental Health Awareness month I wanted to touch on the subject of suicide. It’s not just people with mental illnesses that commit suicide but also those who suffer from chronic health conditions. Each person reaches a level of pain they can’t come back from. Here’s a little of my story.
September is Suicide Prevention Month and I’ve struggled with what to write. I do believe strongly that as a society we have to talk about suicide. As much as I advocate for everything I believe in suicide is something so personal to me that it’s different. It’s not the stigma, I don’t care what anyone thinks about my father’s death. It’s that in order to prevent suicide you have to start so far in advance of the person wanting to commit suicide.
My father abused me and we were estranged from the time I was a teenager. When I lived with my father I knew he was emotionally unstable but I was a kid and had my own problems. After 14 years my father calls me and starts talking about suicide. About how he can’t work, how he doesn’t have any money, and on and on.
The daughter and human in me responded, I was heartbroken, in shock, felt responsible and started paying his bills, sending him money and we talked all the time. He constantly talked about people bugging his phone, and people following him. I didn’t realize at the time my father was delusional.
I continued to beg him every time we talked to not kill himself, to think about my granny, his mother who would be devastated. I talked and pleaded for months. Begged him to go to the doctor. I did what I could.
I got a call late one Sunday saying “your father did away with himself” from my gramps. I was in such shock I called right back and asked was he dead or on the way to the hospital. No, he’s dead.
Here are a few things I learned after my father died.
He had been in a downward spiral for years by looking at his living conditions. He had boxes and boxes of cassette tapes by his bed, recordings he had made. I remember him talking about someone bugging his phone so I listened to every one of those tapes several times. There was nothing on most of them, some were recordings of my father talking on the phone. Some were just noise or his breathing. My father was delusional.
I could go on and on but there are a few takeaways.
One of the most difficult things you have to deal with in a suicide death is a closed casket funeral. You can’t see their face and say goodbye so there is an unmet emotional void that never goes away.
I did everything within my power, my dad was a grown man. A man of his own free will. I could not make him go to the doctor for help. There wasn’t a Gun Law in Texas where you could call the police and they would come out to take away a gun. There may not be one now.
I felt unbearable guilt, the pressure of the weight of thinking I could have prevented my granny’s pain was so much that I drank myself crazy.
What I did learn from his death as we had the same mental illness, Bipolar Disorder, I was 75% more likely to commit suicide because of it. I took that information and I found the best Psychiatrist I could find. He is still my doctor today and has saved my life many times.
You can’t stop someone from killing themselves if they are determined. They will find a way now or later.
What we can do is look for signs early in life and during a crisis to see if a person needs help and guide them in that direction. If you’re a parent you have much more control when your child is younger.
The key to preventing suicide is to bring all the emotional damage to the surface to be dealt with and treat mental illnesses in a responsible manner the best we can. I will also add that if you’re inclined you can push for laws that allow the police to be called and for them to take the gun away for some period of time. Each state is different. You can also push for stronger gun laws if that is your wish.
Melinda
Blogger Highlight-Peace of Life Today
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week I highlight a new blogger, Peace of Life Today.
peace of life today
Taking Control… Learning Contentment
My name is Lisa and two of my major passions are in the area of health (fitness and nutrition) and money (budgeting and planning for the future). I am blessed to be able to do budget coaching as part of my job and find it unbelievably rewarding to be able to help people see money in a new way, and reprioritize was is most important.
Ironically, money and health are the two biggest concerns for many people. They are linked together very strongly and can effect every area of our lives, including work and relationships.
Melinda
To The Military Members That Gave Their All, Thank You!
Memorial Day is a day we set aside to thank the men and women of the military who died for our country.
If it weren’t for the men and women who fought to gain our freedom to become America and all those that followed, we would live a very different life. We have to take a look around and see that everything we have and the freedoms we have are because someone sacrificed for us.
I can’t thank each and every service member enough for paving the way for the life I have and the freedoms I share.
I think about you often and don’t take for granted your sacrifices.
Melinda
Book Review Mind Over Mountain-A Mental and Physical Climb to the Top by Robby Kojetin
I want to send a special thanks to Laura Sebright at Tigger Publishing for sending me Mind Over Mountain-A Mental and Physical Climb to the Top by Robby Kojetin to review.
About the Author
Robby Kojetin lives in Johannesburg, South Africa, and is a high-altitude adventure. Since his accident in 2006 which resulted in him breaking both of his ankles, he has gone on to become one of only a handful of people to have stood on top of the world’s highest mountain, Mount Everest. He has also climbed Kilimanjaro nine times, completed the Ironman triathlon, and scaled five of the Seven Summits. Known as an inspirational and engaging speaker on stage, he presents on the topics of failure, self-doubt and persisting against all odds, in the hopes of inspiring people of all ages and backgrounds facing the daunting mountains and obstacles in their own lives.
Robby is a proud husband and father who also coaches people to reach their personal summit goals. He is a regular contributor to a number of radio programmes, magazine articles and TV features, including DiscoveryChannel’s Everest: Beyond the Limit.
Blurb
A simple mistake at an indoor climbing gym sentenced 28-year-old Robby to a year in a wheelchair, shattering his aspirations of becoming a mountaineer. In the months that followed, Robby faced depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts and a complete loss of his sense of identity.
But from somewhere deep inside him, he summoned up the strength to keep going even when all seemed lost; he embarked on a monumental journey, a feat of mental and physical strength. His weakness became his power. This story is more than a biography or an account of a mountaineering expedition – it showcases the human spirit and shows us all how it is possible to rewrite the definition of what is possible. From those dark days, Robby has become the embodiment of perseverance and possibility, overcoming the odds to join the handful of people who have summited Mount Everest.
One reviewer said “I laughed, I cried, got angry at why something so terrible could happen to someone so good, but most of all I was in awe of what Robby overcame!! A must-read for anyone!!”
My Thoughts
At 22 years old Robby’s identity and self-confidence were tied to rock climbing and all the adventure it brought. He was paving away in a career that he enjoyed that gave him the time off needed to continue his climbing adventures.
Until one fateful day, while practicing on a climbing wall, he jumped off as he had done many times before, the floor gave way causing Robby to shatter both ankles, fracturing several bones and rupturing the tendons from the shin down.
This is a devastating blow to anyone but for an avid rock climber, this could be the end of the adventure. With the love and support of family and friends, Robby concentrates on recovery and walking again. The recovery period is slow, very painful, and takes a toll on his mental health. Some days are dark with no light at the end of the tunnel but he pushes forward.
What Robby does from here is miraculous, not only does Robby walk again but goes on to climb the highest mountain in the world Mount Everest. This book is a fast and very enthralling read. It’s a story of grit and what the mind can allow us to accomplish. I would recommend this book to anyone.
Trigger Publishing
TriggerHub.org is the first mental health organization of its kind. We are bringing mental health recovery and balance to millions of people worldwide through the power of our books.We have built a first-class resource of curated books produced and published in-house to create a unique collection of mental health recovery titles unrivaled in quality and selection. We work with experts, psychologists, doctors, and coaches to produce our books, but we also work with real people looking to share their stories to reach out to others and provide hope, understanding, and compassion. These brave authors also aim to raise awareness of mental health’s “human” face and its impact on everyday lives.
Melinda
The Keys To Maintaining An Active Lifestyle
It’s easy to be active when you’re a kid. After all, it seems that when you’re young, your only mission in life is to run around all day! As adults, however, it’s much more difficult, or at least it can feel that way. While it’s less easy to remain at our active best, that doesn’t mean that it’s impossible. In fact, there are plenty of recommended things you can do that’ll help to keep you active into adult age. In this blog, we’ll run through some of the most effective methods.
Daily Movement
You can’t expect to be active if you’re sitting down all the time. Alas, that’s just what many people are doing, all day, every day. It’s possible that you won’t naturally be given space to exercise because of how busy you are. However, it’s a good idea to try to force it through a little. You’ll find that there are many ways to build little bursts of movement into your day. For instance, you could take the stairs rather than using the elevator. You could cycle to work instead of driving. Even an after-work stroll will keep you up and mobile.
Feed Your Body
Your body needs certain things if it’s going to have the energy levels to be mobile. You can’t just feed your body anything and expect it to work at its full capacity! So make sure that what you’re giving your body is healthy and all-around good for your energy levels. Eat a balanced diet full of all the vitamins you need, and you’ll notice the difference. It’s also a good idea to look beyond the food that you eat, too. Things like HGH therapy and various supplements, such as maca extract, can provide a significant boost to your energy levels. And the more energy you have, the more active you’ll be.
Limit Toxins
We just spoke about giving your body the things that it needs to have energy and be active. But it’s also important to think about not giving your body certain things, too. For example, things like alcohol and tobacco have been shown to impact energy levels over time. And even over a shorter time — no one jumps out of bed when they have a hangover, after all. Look at taking a break from these things or giving up entirely, and you’ll soon find that you have all the energy you need and that your physical performance is much better.
Regular Assessments
Finally, one of the main keys to ensuring that you stay active later in life is to avoid settling into complacency. We’re all creatures of habit, and that means that sometimes, we can slip into detrimental ways of being without fully realizing it. Every now and again, look at reviewing your lifestyle, and analyze whether it’s in line with your health and fitness goals. Taking the time to do this might just be all it takes to make a few changes that really help you in the future.
This is a collaborative post.
Melinda
The Second Amendment To The Constitution
What does the Second Amendment say about gun rights and what it does not say?
The 2nd Amendment was ratified on December 17, 1791, along with the other nine amendments that make up the Bill of Rights. While it is a very short amendment, its exact meaning in terms of what types of weapons are protected and what constitutes a well-regulated militia is still in contention today.
Text of the 2nd Amendment
A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.
What it says is a WELL REGULATED militia has the right to keep and bear arms.
It doesn’t say what the age limit should be.
It doesn’t say all guns.
It DOES say WELL REGULATED, meaning, or opening the door to background checks and regulated by the government.
I’m a gun owner and don’t take the responsibility lightly. I’m also a Republican but I have common sense.
Here are my proposed gun reform laws:
The age limit to buy a gun is 21 years old
An extensive background check is to be conducted.
There is a 30-45 day waiting period while the background checks are taking place before you get your gun.
All assault-type weapons are banned.
Red Flad laws are in place in every state.
If we just did half of these things we could save countless lives. But our government, one side of the government is not acknowledging that the Amendment says well regulated, regulated means by the government who sets the laws.
Regulated means there are laws which mean there are standards that have to be met. So nothing in my plan steps on the Constitution. The only big argument some would have is the assault weapons but there again it says the government regulates who owns the guns. It can very well regulate that no one can own the guns, but it doesn’t mean all guns.
Many of you in other countries are highly regulated when it comes to guns and I have no doubt you don’t have mass shootings. Here in America, some have taken what was written by our forefathers’ to say that all guns are allowed to anyone with no standards in place. That’s not what I read.
When our forefathers wrote well regulated they made it clear how guns could be owned and overseen by the government. What part of that line is hard to read or understand, it’s very clear to me what well-regulated means. But our politicians take no responsibility and say we want to stomp the Second Amendment rights and do nothing. They block every type of gun control law passed by their desk.
How many more children will die because of this ignorance?
Melinda
References:
https://www.thoughtco.com/us-constitution-2nd-amendment-text-105397
Today in History May 29, 2022
Welcome to the weekend edition of Today in History. I’m so glad you’re enjoying the post. Have an awesome weekend.
1953
Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Norgay reach Everest summit
At 11:30 a.m. on May 29, 1953, Edmund Hillary of New Zealand and Tenzing Norgay, a Sherpa of Nepal, become the first explorers to reach the summit of Mount Everest, which at 29,035 feet above sea level is the highest point on earth. The two, part of a British expedition, made their final assault on the summit after spending a fitful night at 27,900 feet. News of their achievement broke around the world on June 2, the day of Queen Elizabeth II’s coronation, and Britons hailed it as a good omen for their country’s future.
2005
Danica Patrick becomes first woman to lead Indy 500
On May 29, 2005, 23-year-old Danica Patrick becomes the first female driver to take the lead in the storied Indianapolis 500. Having previously distinguished herself in the Toyota Atlantic series, Patrick had qualified fourth—another best for a woman—for the 89th Indianapolis …read more
2003
Bob Hope celebrates 100th birthday
Some 35 U.S. states declare it to be Bob Hope Day on May 29, 2003, when the iconic comedic actor and entertainer turns 100 years old. In a public ceremony held in Hollywood, city officials renamed the intersection of Hollywood Boulevard and Vine Avenue–famous for its historic …read more
1917
Future President John F. Kennedy is born
One of America’s best-loved presidents, John Fitzgerald Kennedy, is born into a politically and socially prominent family in Brookline, Massachusetts, on May 29, 1917. He was the first American president to be born and then serve in the 20th century. In 1935, Kennedy enrolled at …read more
1979
Woody Harrelson’s father is arrested for murder
Judge John Wood, known as “Maximum John,” is assassinated outside his San Antonio, Texas, home as he bent down to look at a flat tire on his car. Actor Woody Harrelson’s father, Charles Harrelson, was charged with the murder after evidence revealed that drug kingpin Jimmy Chagra, …read more
Melinda
Stream of Consciousness Saturday #SOCS Prompt is “trail/trial”
Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “trail/trial.” Use one, use both, use them any way you’d like. Bonus points if you use both. Have fun!
Down the trials of lives, we have to take many paths and decide along the way which one to follow. We go with our gut or with facts but we make decisions that lead us down a path. Lawmakers have to decide at this pivotal minute what is the right thing to do, not the trial that is the most traveled but the hard ones, the hardest one that takes courage to cross over to.
We as voters have a path to choose as well when it comes time to vote. Know where your lawmaker stands on gun reform and if they don’t support your beliefs don’t vote for them. It’s time to stop voting down party lines and vote with how we want our country to be led.
There is a middle ground.
Melinda
Here are the rules:
1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing (typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.
3. I will post the prompt here on my blog every Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a particular subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The,’” or will simply be a single word to get you started.
4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours. Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.
5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read all of them! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later or go to the previous week by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find below the “Like” button on my post.
6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!
7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.
8. Have fun!
For more streams, rules, and tips for Stream of Consciousness Saturday, visit our host, Linda at:
Have a great weekend.
Melinda
Fun Facts
Hey, You are the greatest! So glad you stopped by today. Have a great weekend.
If you lift a kangaroo’s tail off the ground, it can’t hop.
Bananas are curved because they grow towards the sun.
Most Korean people don’t have armpit odor.
The original London Bridge is now in Arizona.
During your lifetime, you will produce enough saliva to fill 50 bathtubs!
Reference:
https://www.thefactsite.com/top-100-random-funny-facts/
Enjoy!
Melinda
#Weekend Music Share *Eric Clapton – Tears In Heaven*For The Families In Uvalde, Texas
Welcome back to Weekend Music Share; the place where everyone can share their favorite music.
Feel free to use the ‘Weekend Music Share‘ banner in your post, and don’t forget to use the hashtag #WeekendMusicShare on social media so other participants can find your post.
Melinda
Friday Quote 5/27/2022
Hey! So glad you stopped by today, I look forward to your comments each week.
Melinda
Common Causes Of Anxiety
You only have to listen to the headlines or read the newspaper to see that anxiety levels are rising and a growing number of people are experiencing stress. In this guide, we’ll discuss some common causes of stress and anxiety and offer tips to help you cope.
Unemployment is one of the most talked-about subjects at the moment, with many people losing their jobs or businesses and others struggling to hang on to theirs. Balancing the books is challenging at the best of times when you’re trying to manage a household or raise kids, but the pandemic has exacerbated difficulties and made staying in the black virtually impossible for some. If you’re experiencing financial strain, or you’ve lost your job, there is help out there. Don’t hesitate to seek advice about incentives or support measures that are available to you during the crisis and look for opportunities to increase your income if your workload is reduced or you’ve lost your job. From Forex Trading, to online courses, blogging to temporary jobs, it’s possible to find solutions, even if they are only a short-term option to tide you over. It’s also beneficial to try and reduce spending on non-essential items and to budget to make your money stretch further and find out about programs that could prevent you from getting into debt in the weeks ahead. Some companies are offering freezes on loan and credit card payments, for example.
Relationships can make or break us. While some relationships lift our spirits and make us feel secure and content, others can have a negative impact. Break-ups are tough and it can take a long time to come to terms with the fact that you’re moving in a direction that is different from the one you expected to take. You might have envisioned spending your entire life with a partner, only to find that you’re now on your own. Take your time to process what has happened and to heal. Lean on the people closest to you and try to focus on the present, rather than the past. Often, relationships don’t work, and once you have a sense of perspective and time has passed, you realize that there was a good reason for parting. Let yourself feel and experience emotions and don’t put too much pressure on yourself to get on with life, start dating or stop feeling upset about the situation. Move at your own pace. Everyone copes in different ways and there is no right or wrong way to deal with relationship breakdowns.
Do you feel like you’re swimming against the tide, or do you dread the alarm going off every morning? It’s rare to find a job you enjoy every minute of every day, but work shouldn’t be a source of severe stress or anxiety. If you are feeling under pressure, or you’re struggling to switch off, talk to your boss about your workload, address issues that are getting to you and take some time out. It’s crucial to have a balance and to enjoy downtime. Learn to say no. If you’re already working too many hours without pay, or your to-do list is endless, don’t take on more work or sign yourself up for extra commitments after work. Rest, relax and look after yourself.
Stress and anxiety are rife at the moment. If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. There are myriad causes, but help is available. Don’t hesitate to reach out and try and take care of yourself as best you can.
This is a collaborative post.
Melinda
How to Make Stress Your Friend
Why You Should Define Your Fears Instead Of Your Goals
Guilt is the Shadow in the Mirror
May is Mental Health Awareness month and I wanted to share a post written in 2015. Suicide is one of the reasons we need awareness, it can happen to anyone, with or without notice.
All he said is your daddy has done away with himself. I screamed then said I’m on the way. Calling right back to ask were they sure he was dead? Yes. I think years of abuse left a permanent hole in my heart. I go there to do actions requiring no emotions. It’s like autopilot, it has served me well. I started to think about work, and who I needed to call. I’m driving with emergency lights on going 100 mph calling my work team. I stayed on autopilot until I pulled up to my grandparents.
Estranged since a teen, I thought it odd when he started calling. He sounded delusional and extremely paranoid. Nothing made sense, he was not talking in sentences. I pieced together he didn’t have any money and couldn’t work. Why he could not work must have come from the madness.
I would do anything to avoid my granny being hurt. I paid his bills. Over the next several months the phone calls were my hell on earth. He would threaten to kill himself and then go off on what didn’t sound like words. I couldn’t make out anything he was saying as he yelled on the phone. I would keep trying to redirect him back to our conversation. I did not tell anyone what daddy said. He was mentally ill. It had been years since we talked, maybe this was his norm. I didn’t know.
Everyone sitting on the floor when I entered the door. The first words out of my mouth were what he told me. I felt overwhelming guilt, I let my family down. I knew it wasn’t logical but emotions rarely are. My mind scrambled, my father sexually abused me and I’m feeling guilty. I forgave my father, cut him out of my life, paid bills, and feel guilty.
My grandparents and I went to daddy’s the next morning. The disarray would alert anyone that something was wrong. On his coffee table, his lockbox opened with every card I had ever given him, every school photo. The divorce paperwork to my mother laid on the table, his bible open to Job. You could see tear stains on the pages. The house had papers scattered everywhere, dishes piled up, and everything was thrown around. My father had reached the bottom long ago and no one knew.
I found a shoebox full of cassette tapes from recorded phone conversations. It took seven months to listen to every tape. I would have a couple of drinks, listen and cry. Like a tornado in my head, being in the house my sexual abuse took place, daddy putting 357 mag to my head, being a drug addict, and my boyfriend and I planning how to kill my father. These are the times the hole in my heart is useful. Granny didn’t know about the abuse and went to her grave not knowing. To help my granny cope, I would not cry or show emotion around her. I wanted to piece her heart back together. Holding emotions inside extended my grieving process for a long seven years.
A couple of weeks later the morgue called asking me to pick up the gun. Ring the side doorbell, someone brought the original suicide note, autopsy report, and gun with dried blood. My mind could not prepare for reading the autopsy report. Every detail of how he shot himself. The trajectory of bullets, lobes damaged, bones crushed, and exit wounds.
I believe my father died so I could live. Learning about his mental illness pointed me to my own. Thru ancestry, I connected with daddy’s half-brother and several family members. There were over ten suicides in only three generations and many are now with severe mental illness.
Daddy
1940-1992
Melinda
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH-Change Gun Laws
In less than two weeks over 30 families have been torn apart by gun violence. Two weeks! What the FUCK is going on in our country. You’ve heard by now of the senseless shooting in Uvalde, Texas yesterday. An 18-year-old purchased a semi-automatic rifle, killed his grandmother went to the elementary school, and left behind 19 students and two teachers dead. With several more students in critical condition in the hospital. We may be adding to that number.
How can we find this acceptable? What is it going to take to get to the root of the problem? I’m tired of throwing bandaids on the real issues. GUN LAWS!
I’m embarrassed that one of the Texas lawmakers suggested that more police was the answer. REALLY? More police in schools are the answer? How many shootings have occurred when an officer was on campus?
I’m a gun owner, and I believe that people have the right to carry a gun. People who are responsible to carry a gun, not just anyone. This 18-year-old shooter went to the store and bought a semi-automatic rifle. Why in the hell was this allowed? The person that sold him the gun should go to jail!
I don’t have all the answers but I know that we have to get our lawmakers off their asses and make changes to the law. No one needs a semi-automatic rifle, they are for mass shootings. We have to make guns much harder to get, much more extensive, and longer time periods before buying a gun.
I know there are those who say I want to stomp on their 2nd amendment rights but that is not the case. Taking all guns away is taking those rights away. I want anyone who has a problem with what I have to say, to go to Uvalde and see the carnage left behind. The families are torn apart by what could have easily been prevented. Look them in the eye and make your case. Attend all the funerals and tell me we don’t need gun reform.
Matthew McConaughey is from Uvalde and here’s a snippet of what he had to say.
Matthew McConaughey is from Uvalde
“Once again, we have tragically proven that we are failing to be responsible for the rights our freedoms grant us,” he wrote, in part. “The true call to action now is for every American to take a longer and deeper look in the mirror and ask ourselves, ‘What is it that we truly value? How do we repair the problem?’
“We cannot exhale once again, make excuses, and accept these tragic realities as the status quo.”
He went on to ask Americans to find “common ground” so that they can put an end to mass shootings.
–
How many more lives have to be lost before we force change? What if it’s your child next, your neighbor’s child, your mother, or your husband?
We all have to send a message to lawmakers, LAWMAKERS are the people who get it done. This is not on the President, he doesn’t make the laws. We each have elected officials that are supposed to listen to what we want, and what we need. It’s these state lawmakers that we elect who have to stop playing politics in the aisle and make real change. We have to hold them accountable.
We have to send a message by how we vote.
I’m seething and know when I turn on the news in the next couple of days there will be another mass shooting and another.
The time is now!
Melinda
Wordless Wednesday*Pink Lillys
Thanks for stopping by today, I appreciate your comments each week.
Before
Blooming time
Melinda
How Keeping a Mood Chart Changed My Life
May is Mental Health Awareness Month and I wanted to share a tool that helped me better communicate with my doctor about my mood swings and how I was doing in between appointments.
Cleaned up repost from 2014
When I started seeing my Psychopharmacologist almost 16 years ago he intimidated me. He’s not a chipper guy and it took years to see through his shell. I was in a very dark place and spiraling down. I didn’t think he understood how depressed I was.
Psychiatrists are different from therapists in that, they only provide medication management, and appointments are 20 minutes at most. So we had a couple of frustrating meetings. I didn’t know how to reach him, I didn’t know doctor talk. He is one of the best in Texas and finding a Psychopharmacologist is difficult, I wasn’t walking away.
During another frustrating meeting, he left the room to talk to a therapist he worked with. He did me the biggest favor and no doubt saved my life. He suggested I sit down with a therapist to see if she could help me better communicate what was going on. They had worked together for 13 years, and she provided some insight into his personality and how best to communicate with him.
She drew a chart and we talked about how depressed I was. She repeated back to make sure she was on track and then gave me the chart. At that time I was rapid cycling, and adjusting to meds, and didn’t think I was improving. The Mood Chart brought our communication on the same page. I liked the log because it gave me an opportunity to show how I was cycling or any other significant change. I took out a journal and started keeping a daily log of the chart and any info about my state of mind. It gave me an opportunity to see exactly what was happening at any given time or day and look for trends, triggers, and side effect notes.
I want to share the chart for those struggling with their mental illness or who have trouble communicating with their doctor.
Once we were on the same page, he was able to give me the help I needed. I would suggest a larger sheet of paper to give room for notes.
My chart may look different than yours since I discovered my normal was actually below the normal line. You basically draw a line down the middle of a piece of paper. The line is normal mood. Then you track 1-10 above the line or below the line. Mine is not the best example but it’s the only one I kept.
I would track 1-10 below the line if I was depressed and 1-10 above the line if I was feeling good or high. I would also write some notes in there to help describe the mood or feelings at the time. There are some mood charts online that you can print off that might help.
Tracking my moods gave me a way to spell out exactly what I was going thru with documentation that helped me answer questions from the doctor that I may not have remembered otherwise.
Melinda
National Military Appreciation Month
May, marked officially as Military Appreciation Month, is a special month for both those in and out of the military.
Introduced in 1999 by Sen. John McCain and honored every May, Military Appreciation Month encourages Americans to reflect on the sacrifices made by soldiers, sailors, and all current and former military personnel.
Not only do we pause on Memorial Day to remember the sacrifice and service of those who gave all, but the month also holds several other military anniversaries and events, including Military Spouse Appreciation Day and Armed Forces day.
The American military was founded even before the country itself. To fight the British and gain independence for the future United States, the Continental Congress created the army in 1775. After winning the Revolutionary War, the Founding Fathers didn’t intend to have a standing army. They disbanded the Continental Army and called for the “well-armed militias” that have become a flashpoint in today’s debate over the Second Amendment.
Today, the U.S. military is the world’s largest employer, with close to 3.5 million personnel employed in one way or another. The U.S. Department of Defense hires more people than any other organization or corporation in the world. By contrast, Wal-Mart, the largest private company, has 2.2 million employees worldwide.
I have to utmost respect for every person who joins the military, every role is vital and that love and respect extend to the families. We would not be America if it weren’t for our military, we wouldn’t be a respected world leader and we wouldn’t have the power to help others in need.
My gramps was a WWII veteran and one day while going thru some of his military paperwork I discovered he was awarded a Bronze Star. Gramps never talked about his time in the military so it was no surprise that I had no idea what awards he had. I ask him where his award was and he went into the garage and pulled it out of his toolbox. Grunge and all, there it was. I felt such pride and my gramps just brushed it off and said everyone got one of them. I knew better and after his death, I discovered many more metals he was awarded during his time serving our country.
When gramps died we were at the height of the war, and Ft. Hood was stretched very thin. I wanted a military funeral service and they weren’t sure anyone could come. I was shocked the day of the funeral, four soldiers arrived. At the end of the service, two of them folded the flag with gentle and respectful hands and then handed it to me. I felt such pride for my gramps, the four soldiers there that day, and to be an American.
Melinda
References:
Blogger Highlight-Creation of a beautiful life
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week I highlight a new blogger, Creation of a beautiful life.
Creation of a beautiful life
Placing the focus on self-love, self-care, and the pathways that lead us to happiness
Hello my dear readers! Thank you for your interest, not only in my site but in knowing a little about me. My Name is Tiffany Wade. I’m a very happy wife, a lover of books, writing and creating!
I’m still exploring my pathway of self-love and care. And by sharing my thoughts and insights, I hope I may be able to help encourage and strengthen others along their path as well. Each of our paths will be unique and different, but our goal of self-love and care we have in common.
Melinda
Book Review Yes, You Can Talk About Mental Health At Work by Melissa Doman
I want to give a special thanks to Laura Sebright from Trigger Publishing for sending me the book, Yes, You Can Talk About Mental Health At Work By Melissa Doman for review.
256 pages
About the Author
Blurb
This timely and practical book is for any employee, manager or leader who wants to understand mental health at a deeper level, and learn how to talk about it really well in the workplace.
Taking a realistic approach through research, stories of lived experience, and applied techniques that anyone can use, this approachable book covers a variety of crucial areas, including:
- How we bring our beliefs and experiences around mental health and mental illness into the workplace
- The importance of understanding how the language we use, consciously or unconsciously, impacts our interactions with others
- Ways to manage the challenges around having mental health conversations at work
- Step-by-step ‘how-to’ conversation guides, alongside practical tools
- Concrete tips on ways to action this education, individually or at a team level
After reading this book, you will feel empowered and equipped to have constructive, meaningful conversations about mental health in your workplace.
My Thoughts
Talking about mental health at work is not something I’ve ever felt comfortable with, even with my most trusted managers. I spent my career battling mental illness yet told no one, it’s not just the stigma around mental illness but the fear of the information being held against you in some way.
This book is a great tool for anyone who manages people on how to keep the lines of communication open and create a comfortable work environment.
Everyone faces a mental health challenge at some point in their life, and it affects our entire life including our work life. Some conversations are easier than others and having a tool to help prepare you for those sensitive subjects is critical to being a good manager.
Melissa takes her real-world experience, gives you a step-by-step guide on conversations you may encounter, and provides you with the tools to have deep meaningful conversations about mental health in the workplace.
This is a must-read for every people manager, from the start of your career to being a veteran manager.
Trigger Publishing
TriggerHub.org is the first mental health organization of its kind. We are bringing mental health recovery and balance to millions of people worldwide through the power of our books.
We have built a first-class resource of curated books produced and published in-house to create a unique collection of mental health recovery titles unrivaled in quality and selection. We work with experts, psychologists, doctors, and coaches to produce our books, but we also work with real people looking to share their stories to reach out to others and provide hope, understanding, and compassion. These brave authors also aim to raise awareness of mental health’s “human” face and its impact on everyday lives.
Melinda
Everyday Magic 5/22/2022
I’m so glad you are enjoying Everyday Magic. I find it a good place to wind down and ask some important questions.
Bella and Grace by Stampington
To really live life to its fullest, it’s important to be able to see the beauty in things where others do not.
What unconventional things do you find beauty in?
Enjoy your day!
Melinda
Today in History May 22, 2022
Welcome to the weekend edition of Today in History. I’m so glad you’re enjoying the post. Have an awesome weekend.
1859
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of Sherlock Holmes, is born
It’s the birthday of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, the creator of master sleuth Sherlock Holmes. Doyle was born in Scotland and studied medicine at the University of Edinburgh, where he met Dr. Joseph Bell, a teacher with extraordinary deductive reasoning power. Bell partly inspired …read more
1958
Jerry Lee Lewis drops a bombshell in London
The arrival in the United Kingdom of one of the biggest figures in rock and roll was looked forward to with great anticipation in May of 1958. Nowhere in the world were the teenage fans of the raucous music coming out of America more enthusiastic than they were in England, and …read more
2004
Controversial documentary “Fahrenheit 9/11” wins Palme d’Or prize
On May 22, 2004, Michael Moore’s documentary film Fahrenheit 9/11 beats out 18 other films to win the coveted Palme d’Or, the top prize at the Cannes Film Festival. It became the first documentary to triumph at Cannes since The Silent World, co-directed by Jacques Cousteau and …read more
1981
Atlanta child murderer is traced using rare nylon fiber
Police staking out a bridge over the Chattahoochee River near Atlanta, Georgia, hear a loud splash, and begin chasing Wayne Williams as he attempts to drive away in a station wagon. After questioning him about his involvement in the unprecedented string of child murders in …read more
1939
The Pact of Steel is signed; the Axis is formed
On May 22, 1939, Italy and Germany agree to a military and political alliance, giving birth formally to the Axis powers, which will ultimately include Japan. Mussolini coined the nickname “Pact of Steel” (he had also come up with the metaphor of an “axis” binding Rome and Berlin) …read more
Melinda
Stream of Consciousness Saturday #SOCS Prompt is “clear”
Today’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “clear.” Use it any way you’d like. Enjoy!
Today the prompt is a good one, clear. I’m not thinking clear after weeks of poor sleep. One thing I remember growing up was being able to sleep late on weekends. My granny would let me sleep until 11:00. that was a good thing because any earlier I would be a monster and probably have a monster hangover headache. But I digress. She would come in to wake me up and say I don’t know how you can lay there that long my bones would hurt me. I thought that was silly and she was giving me a hard time for being lazy.
Fast forward to 58 years old, now my bones hurt. Not after a night’s sleep, not even four hours of sleep but every two hours. I have to wake up and move the dogs around which gets them grumpy and after I get settled I’m wide awake. Then two hours later it’s the other hip or shoulder and it’s time to repeat.
This has gone on night after night, for the last year since I stop taking pain medication. What is clear to me is pain medication is required if I’m ever going to sleep a full night again. I ofter ask while trying to go back to sleep how my granny did it without so much as a Tylenol.
Here’s another take on “clear”, it’s clearly. I’m not thinking that way this morning but look forward to that day. As Johnny Nash says I can see all the obstacles in my way.
Johnny Nash – I Can See Clearly Now
Melinda
Here are the rules:
1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing (typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write. 2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop. 3. I will post the prompt here on my blog every Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a particular subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The,’” or will simply be a single word to get you started. 4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours. Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below. 5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read all of them! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later or go to the previous week by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find below the “Like” button on my post. 6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get! 7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views. 8. Have fun!
For more streams, rules, and tips for Stream of Consciousness Saturday, visit our host, Linda at: Linda G Hill
Have a great weekend.
Melinda
Fun Facts
Hey, You are the greatest! So glad you stopped by today. Have a great weekend.
The oldest “your mom” joke was discovered on a 3,500-year-old Babylonian tablet.
Two infectious diseases have been successfully wiped out: Smallpox and Rinderpest.
May 29 is officially “Put a Pillow on Your Fridge Day.”
Cherophobia is the irrational fear of fun or happiness.
7% of American adults believe that chocolate milk comes from brown cows.
Reference:
https://www.thefactsite.com/top-100-random-funny-facts/
Enjoy!
Melinda
#Weekend Music Share *Midnight Special-Steve Miller Band “Fly Like An Eagle”
Welcome back to Weekend Music Share; the place where everyone can share their favorite music.
Feel free to use the ‘Weekend Music Share‘ banner in your post, and don’t forget to use the hashtag #WeekendMusicShare on social media so other participants can find your post.
Melinda
Friday Quote 5/20/2022
Hey! So glad you stopped by today, I look forward to your comments each week.
Melinda
Summer Here Its Time For Ticks
This is a post I wrote in 2015 right after my port was inserted. I feel it’s important for people to understand the magnitude of Lyme Disease, it can be life-threatening if it develops into the chronic stage like mine did.
Summer is right around the corner and most won’t give ticks a second thought. Here’s a photo of why you should. IV Antibiotic Therapy is administered the same way chemotherapy is, thru a port straight into your system.
The amount of antibiotics required to fight Lyme is so high your stomach can’t handle it. Your stomach has a hard enough time with the medication you do have to take and the nausea medication only goes so far.
You can’t begin to imagine the care that goes into changing the port bandage, it’s critical that no germs enter the port area. It could cause a deadly infection.
You can prevent Lyme with a few simple steps, please take them while you are out enjoying your summer.
Wear DEET
Check for ticks
Stay out of the tall brush, or tuck your pants into your socks
Wear a hat that hangs down on the back to prevent ticks from falling down your shirt
Wear white socks so you can see the ticks crawling up your legs
Happy trails!
Melinda
Brief Lyme Update #14 *Lyme-tough Me-still have fight in me*
I had surgery for a Port today, it is required for IV Treatment. I choose IV Therapy because it has a record of healing faster. I can tell already a Port for 9-12 months is no merry-go-round. The surgical area’s not bad.
The procedure is short, it takes longer to prep than do surgery. A catheter goes into a small section of the heart, then is brought thru the skin to take medicine through the tubing hanging down with a blue top. Doctors do the procedure differently. The bandaging stays the entire time and is changed once a week.
This is my basic regimen for those who don’t understand the horrible effects of Lyme IV Therapy. In a future post, I’ll talk about the cost of treatment. If you would like to know more leave me a comment or read all 13 of my Lyme post. All ticks can carry Lyme, ticks the size of sesame seed to a piece of rice. P.S. mosquitoes and flies can also carry Lyme. The best revenge is a sunscreen with 20% DEET. If out hiking in pants tucked into socks. Wear light-colored clothes and search like crazy once home, think of a tick that small in your hair.
Starter Regime
Five Supplements (every day)
Seven RX pills (every day)
10mg Morphine patch (one a week)
M, W & F Antibiotic Drip 2 times a day with 2 shots of Heparin
On all other days, two bags of lactose for detox with a shot of Heparin
Each drip takes about an hour
Blood Test once a week
Fly out-of-state once a month for doctor’s appointment
You can not get the bandage wet. Stick saran wrap over the bandage, and you can shower, only if you can do magic tricks.
I hope seeing a photo and reading the post will help put the two together.
XO M
Just Pondering
Bella Grace Field Guide by Stampington
What are five things you can do that never fail to turn your day around?
Melinda
lookingforthelight.blog 