Will Having Children Change Your Marriage?

There is no denying that your life is going to change once you have children. This is the biggest change in anyone’s life. You and your partner have created another human. You will experience a love you have never experienced before. You will have a sense of responsibility you have never experienced before. You will be doing and learning about things you have never done before. It is only natural that this has an impact on the dynamic of your relationship. So, with that being said, let’s take a look at some of the common ways that relationships change once you have had kids.

Photo by Katie E on Pexels.com

Your relationship will end up getting a bit neglected 

This is only natural. You don’t end up nurturing or prioritizing your relationship in the way that you should because you now have a crying baby to attend to all of the time. You will not have the attention and time you did for one and another before the baby. This can be difficult. However, it is important to try and make some time for one and another whenever you can. If your family offers to look after your baby so you can have a date night, take advantage of it. 

You have a new bond 

No matter how tough it gets, you will find that you have a new bond. Yes, lack of sleep takes its toll. Nevertheless, you have brought a beautiful baby into the world, which makes you smile and laugh. You will feel closer than ever. Despite the ups and downs, this strong sense of unity will be there. 

You might hate your partner a little bit 

Hate is a bit of a strong word here because it is rarely genuine hate, although it can feel like it at the time. You may find yourself snapping at your partner 24/7 or resenting them for going to work. It is important to recognize that your hormones are all over the place. You may think you need a divorce lawyer, but try to be patient and work through it. Of course, there are cases whereby divorce is the only option but take your time here. Most people refer to this stage as early mood swings. Not only have you gone through hormonal changes but you are probably suffering from a severe lack of sleep too. This is completely normal, so long as it does not turn into postpartum depression. 

As you can see, there are a number of different ways that your relationship may change once you have had children. Some of these changes are positive and some are negative. However, it is important to acknowledge and accept these changes. Don’t be hard on yourself or your partner. You are both adjusting to a new way of life, and that in itself can be a challenge. Nevertheless, it is the most beautiful challenge of them all! 

This is a collaborative post.



      1. We’ve had a similar experience, which is infinitely not the norm. I can only speak for myself, but both Covid and an illness earlier this year have reminded me to be so grateful for what, and who, I have in my life. From this perspective, all the “small stuff” seems so much less significant.

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