This is what child abuse looks like. Just like any other parent is what it looks like until you peel the layers back.
Original post 1/2015
I found photos of myself starting at birth. As I looked at each photo my mind was asking who could hit this child. I began to sob, continuing to look at each as I grew older. The question of who could hit this child grew louder in my head. People who don’t know me are probably thinking I was crying for myself. The truth is I didn’t think about my circumstances once. I looked at each photo as any child being abused, not even seeing myself in the photo. I knew logically they were me but my mind turns off. I had a similar experience after seeing a news report of a 9-year-old girl abused, starved, and killed by her parents. She died chained to a post on the front porch. I was heartbroken and wished someone could have helped her. There were no tears at home. Several days later I started talking to my Therapist about the girl. I cried, expressing a range of emotions, and it took a few minutes to compose myself. I asked my Therapist if the emotions were suppressed, and I didn’t think so. After 16 years she knows me and explained I feel deep compassion for others.
I read my Baby Book, I wanted to show that abused children and abusers don’t look any different. The parents can say sweet things to cover the abuse at home.
My Mother’s Message To Her Child
To my beautiful young lady. I wish you all the happiness and grace to you. May God fill your life with all his richness and love. May your path be filled with roses and your heart be filled with the pureness of God.
New mothers often write their child’s milestones in a Baby Book. Here is my Mother’s observations and comments mine starting at birth.
Lock of hair from the first cut at 12 months old
The first baby ring at 18 months
Hand and footprints traced, right hand at 8 months and right foot at 3 months
My first toys were a baseball bat and glove from my gramps
I learned to ride a bike at 4 years old
Started walking at 8 months, potty trained at 19 months
Notes: Happy birthday my sweet little kitten, likes to blow bubbles with her food, first school play 5 years old, I was so proud I cried, she has a little temper, she has a big beautiful smile, at 16 months loves music and dancing
The entries stopped but the abuse didn’t.