What’s Inside

This year I turn 60 and have been thinking about who I am today. My life is not fulfilling, fun, independent and the only thing to get me to laugh is funny animal videos.

My life at 38 years old was vibrant, daring, and at the top of my career, and traveling the world. Life gets smaller for most as they age, for me, it’s life changes and my chronic illnesses.

I’m in the house all day, some days feeling angry.

The last time I saw my Therapist, I shared a story about trying to help my ex-husband after his death. My husband didn’t understand why I would get involved but I wanted to make sure his wishes were kept. I ask her why did I do that when I hadn’t talked to him in over 20 years?

Her answer was simple, that’s the type of person you are, you want what is right for others. She also reminded me of the other great qualities I have. To name a few.



Want to help people




I get caught up in life and our issues we forget what’s on the inside of us, who we really are. It’s extremely important we reflect on the type of person we are to better understand why we make the decisions we do and once thought is given to the traits your confidence may grow.

What are your traits?





  1. Sounds like an excellent therapist, at least that time. You’re absolutely right about how we can forget who we are and what’s inside us, especially when we lose so much and struggle day to day. It becomes about the loss and struggle and how small our world now is. And it’s too easy to berate ourselves, as so many with chronic conditions seem to do, about the things we’re not doing well, the life we’re not living, the way we’re not going fast enough or not achieving enough. The goodness, the qualities we have, the person we are deep down, gets lost in the fray. I hope you can re-read this post when you need to, Mel, and remind yourself just what an awesome, empathetic and kind person you are. No ifs, no buts.

    Caz xxxx

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Yes – I’ve had a new date! June 17th, so not long… ๐Ÿ˜ฒ Just been very poorly, and very busy which is just making it worse, but there’s a lot to get through. How’re you holding up? xx

        Liked by 1 person

        1. It’s a long, heavy weight so I’ll save it for after your surgery. Don’t want to give your anything else to think about. Do you remember to take time out for self-care, tea in the afternoon maybe? I’m so glad the surgery is near and pray this time they fix you up better than you are now. I’l be thinking about you. Hugs.

          Liked by 1 person

          1. It’s kind of you to think of me, but you can tell me if you want to. I’m just overwhelmed with too much to do and losing too much time not being functional, so it’s getting to me a bit. I still want to hear how you are, and I think about you often and hope you get some brighter days in the middle of all you have to deal with. ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’œ

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          2. What I didn’t tell you is, I’m dying, Stage 3 Kidney Disease with 2-5 years to live. I’ll know more in early July after more tests are done. I’m ok so far because I haven’t let the reality soak in. I’m making boxes of photos and family items to give to my brother and his wife. I’m thrilled your surgery is finally here and can’t wait to see how it improves your life. Hugs.


          3. What? I don’t understand. Stage 3? How? Jesus, Mel. I don’t know what to say. There’s nothing that can be done? Let me email you, so you don’t have to write here if you’re not comfortable to. xx

            Liked by 1 person

  2. I definitely see all those attributes your therapist mentioned, Melinda. You are such a wonderful person, and though your life is not easy, you are such a light to others. As you said, it can be easy to kind of lose ourselves in the day to day. I hope you know what a wonderful person you are, and how many other lives you touch each day.

    Liked by 1 person

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