Sometimes people walk into our lives and years later you realize the impact they made in your life. In some cases, it hurts more before it gets better. No doubt you have people in your life that have done the same.
My grandparent’s support goes without saying
The 5th grade Music Teacher forced me to talk to my counselor about how I got the bruise on my face. This was one of the most traumatic experiences but she was doing her job. If a child looks like child abuse you have to take action.
My Probation Officer drove me to all of my Orthodontist appointments. She believed I could be reformed, I was on probation for carrying a gun the state took custody of me, and off to Bad-Girl Boarding School. If I had gone to a hard labor camp I don’t think I would have made it. My anger and attitude at the time would have driven me to the ground.
The Nuns and Father George at boarding school. The Nuns often gave positive affirmations and prayers. Father George was old as dirt but he took time out every day to teach me the piano.
My Counselor, Cathotholoism Teacher, and Godfather changed my life. He spent so many hours preparing me for Baptism and Confirmation. He was nerdy, had a double Ph.D., and was the most generous man I have known. He made me feel so smart! After being told daily by my mother that I was stupid, she convinced me. I attended a celebration at his house and there were mostly educators there. They all treated me as an equal, not talking down to me, and they asked me some questions, it was one of the greatest days. He gave me Man’s Search for Meaning, along with several books on Psychology. He changed my life.
When I was 13 years old and in bad-girl boarding school, my Journalism teacher asked me to create a newsletter. Not only was it my dream to be a Journalist, but she also gave me full control of the content. What a confidence boost! She was young and one of the few people who came from outside the Convent to teach. I still have a copy and it’s hilarious but it’s so special to me.
I’ve been seeing my Therapist for almost 30 years and we’ve become close. She has a gentle approach and never pushes me. I’ve been able to resolve most of the trauma in my life working with her and she has taught me so much about myself.
I’ve been seeing my Psychopharmacologist for 32 years, I sought him out after my father committed suicide. For the first couple of years, I didn’t think he liked me. His style is gruff but after learning how to talk his language, everything worked out. He’s a genius, he probably has the DSM5 memorized. He’s been there thru all of the ups and downs, and he’s been so generous in teaching me about my Mental Illness. He’s retiring soon and it breaks my heart! Will I find a doctor that can fill his shoes?
Who has changed your life?
Melinda
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This was beautiful to read. I’m glad someone finally got you to realise that, contrary to what you’d learned, you are intelligent. You are so much more than that and it’s awful to think you’d ever be told otherwise. I’m glad for these people in your life who’ve been there at some stage of journey. xxxx
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Thank you for the kind words, I needed them badly. I’m having a emotional crisis right now. I was reading more about three officers who shot a mentally ill woman thru the door. It brought up the repressed memory of having a non-violent crisis in the front yard, long story short I had an officer pull a gun on me. I’ve been crying every since the memory came back and I’ve been in bed crying. Actually I’ll probably copy part of this a post it. I don’t know when I’lll be active. It’s deplorable that a woman considered wealthy, great insurance and doctors could not check in to psychiatric hospital. My crying is for all the others who don’t have my resources, what happens to those on the opposite end are often killed during a Mental Health call. The Govenor looked in the eyes of all the families of mass gun shootings, promising to do something, no gun control because that’s not the issue. That’s the BS line from all Republicans. So he tells people at their most devastating moment he is going to make changes. HE sure did, he pasted a 2 Billion Mental Health Bill and not one penny goes for Mental Health Services. All of the money is being spent to build new jails and jails with Psych hospitals. His stigma against those who are mentally ill says you all belong in jail. That set me on fire!!!!!
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I’m not surprised it triggered you. It sets me on fire seeing news like this and I don’t have the trauma behind it like you do. The awareness around mental health is thankfully different to what it once was, but the stigma, that deep underlying BS, is so pervasive when it comes to mental illness. Please go easy on yourself, Mel. It’s awful feeling you have no power over what the morons in charge are doing. I drive myself mad with it when it comes to healthcare here. It just ends up winding you tightly into a ball of rage, and it’s all for nothing. Easier said than done, but focus on you for the moment. 💜 xxxxx
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I’m in bed most of the day. Trying to overcome to anger at the shooting of the mentally ill woman thru her front window. Once I can overcome this anger, my therapist will be back from surgery and I can start to deal with the other. When I can I’m doing research on our governor going back to his first term. How much has he spent in total on Mental Health Support, other mental health statistics, and one cleaned up I’m sending to newspapers, television stations and anywhere I can. I want him to change the name of the bill since not one penny is going to support residents. Until the information about how little he has spent on MH and how he deceived all of Texas with his switch bait plan.
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