How Do You Heal From Trauma?

I had a conversation with my Therapist about healing from trauma recently. I asked her, if a traumatic memory is triggered and there is no emotion or pain associated with it does that mean it’s not traumatic anymore. She explained that the memory is still traumatic until I attach a memory to it.

Everyone has trauma in their life. It could be the death of a loved one, a horrific car accident, losing your job, or any other trauma you can think of including chronic illnesses. Many people push the trauma down and go about their business. When I was younger most of my worst traumas were in a box. It’s a survival method and not the recommended way to heal!

I started seeing my Therapist 30 years ago, and we’ve slowly talked through most of my trauma. Healing is a slow process but a necessary one. I’m sharing my slimmed-down description of the process. Healing also includes self-care, lots of self-care, and giving yourself grace. 

Healing Process

The first step is acknowledging the trauma. 

You need to talk to a Therapist about the trauma in great detail. This can be difficult which means you may talk about one trauma for a month or more.

Once you’ve talked through the trauma it’s easy to think you’re healed. Not so.

The final step to healing is taking each trauma and adding emotion to it. This is a tough part. You have to mentally go back to the trauma and feel the emotion felt at the time and process it.

 

 

She reminded me that I had to relive the trauma and feel the emotion. I didn’t have to think about it, I’m not going back. Why? My daily life is not affected, the memories rarely come up, if at all, and I can deal with that. In the future, if a memory hits hard and stays with me, I will take the next step.

We all deserve to live our best life and you have to make your own decisions. You’re in charge, if you are not ready to talk, don’t talk. Please know that all traumatic memories stay with you until you process them. Once you are ready to talk, go at your own speed, healing is no marathon.

At times of trauma and stress, individuals may turn to drugs and alcohol as a coping mechanism in an attempt to ease pain or escape overwhelming emotions related to their experiences. While such substances may provide temporary relief, reliance on substances often complicates healing journeys further, leading to further emotional and physical problems. Recognizing such tendencies is key, as this allows individuals to explore healthier coping strategies. Getting assistance from professionals such as therapists, support groups, and facilities like Woburn Addiction Treatment may lead to more constructive routes toward healing while stressing that healthy alternatives exist despite the challenges you experience.

To achieve healing of any type, you have to feel positive toward your Therapist in order to build trust in them. It may take seeing several before meeting a person you click with. Once you trust them, stay with them.

My version of healing from trauma may sound easy but I assure you it’s not. My mother left me in the bathtub at six months old and went downstairs to talk with my Granny before being asked where I was. The trauma builds from there and I survived with the help of my Grandparents and my Therapist.

The process of dealing with trauma can bring up other unpleasant emotions relating to these memories, such as anxiety. Going back and reliving events from the past prevents you from repressing them as you normally would. It feels like blood-letting while you’re doing it, but it is also one of those things that’s essential. If you don’t go through it (preferably with the help of a therapist), it’ll all stay inside you and you won’t get better. 

Even if you’re not ready to deal with the tough stuff, there are many benefits to having a Therapist to talk to. My Therapist has helped me deal with so much more than trauma. 

Melinda