I’ve kept these thoughts to myself but this post came together as thoughts of my childhood and teenage years. My life didn’t get better until I went to boarding school and went to live with my grandparents 14 years old.
“how many times can I scrap the food off my plate and spit the rest into my napkin before an explosion happens”.
“no way will I invite anyone to the house, it would probably be the last time I see them”.
“why me and not my brother, I forgot he’s the chosen child”
” house is an explosion to happen, either I get beat or she gets it, it will happen”
“you cut my hair so bad, probably on purpose”
” I can’t make any noise so most of the time I’m in the closet.”
“I won’t make friends because I don’t want anyone to find out.”
“you tried to kill me at 6 months old by leaving me in the bathtub and going downstair to talk to granny, you left me to die?”
“you always tell me how much you hate my father and I’m just like him. Does that mean you hate me? I think so.”
“my first attempt at suicide was at 9 years old.”
“you abused me starting at 6 months old, you’re a monster”
“out of sight, we called him Hitler.”
“because you were forced to marry Daddy when you got pregnant, might I add that you were engaged to someone else?”
“you let your mother and her mother say such horrible things like, I was a mistake, you’ve ruined your mother’s life time after time.”
“you didn’t tell me anything about menstruation. I went to the bathroom at school and totally freaked because something was wrong with me. A teacher had to come get me.”
This is all I can write, so many emotions to deal with. Sharing is good for others in the same place or know someone living with domestic violence.
Melinda
My smile is for my granny while taking me to get a photo taken.
For your next birthday party, make a “pavlova” – a delicious meringue shell filled with whipped cream and topped with fresh fruit. With it’s sweet, fluffy interior and crunchy crust, meringue is a favorite for kids of all ages. The desert, which is claimed by both New Zealand and Australia, was created for the great imperial Russian ballerina, Anna Palova, during her tour in the 1920’s.
INGREDIENTS:
4 egg whites
1 cup fine granulated sugar (castor sugar)
1 teaspoon white vinegar
2 teaspoons cornstarch
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup heavy cream
1 tablespoon whipping cream
1 tablespoon powdered sugar (if desired)
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
Strawberries and kiwi fruit
Preheat oven to 250 degrees. Beat egg whites quickly until they look like ribbons when dropped from the beater. Add sugar, one tablespoon at a time, beating after each addition. Beat meringue mixture until it forms stiff peaks but isn’t dry.
Fold vinegar, cornstarch, and vanilla into the mixture. Using parchment paper on a cookie sheet, spoon the meringue mixture into a circle on the sheet about six to eight inches in diameter ( a rubber spatula really helps with this step.)
Bake 1 1/2 hours. Turn the oven off and open the door, leaving the meringue to cool. The meringue shell will fall as it cools but that is okay.- that’s what whipped cream is for.
When the meringue shell is cool, whip the cream in the mixing bowl until it thickens. If desired, add sugar and vanilla to the cream. Don’t overbeat the cream or it will clump. Cover meringue with whipped cream and sliced fruit. You might want to make two-this is a very popular dessert! One pavlova serves six to eight people. And just in case you’d like the kids to eat dinner before dessert, try this traditional New Zealand family dinner one weekend.
You can also make roller bottles filled with essential oils that are uplifting and energizing during this busy season. This recipe smells amazing, or you could make your own.
Add the wild orange, frankincense, and peppermint essential oils into a 10-ml roller bottle. Top it off with your choice of carrier oil, such as fractionated coconut oil, jojoba oil, or sweet almond oil.
We replace the flour in this recipe with Pamela’s gluten-free baking mix. Pamela’s baking mix includes xanthan gum, baking soda, salt, and baking powder. you have to add these ingredients if you are using plain gluten-free flour that does not already have them added.
Ingredients:
3 cups gluten-free flour*
2 1/2 teaspoons xanthan gum
1 teaspoon cider vinegar
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
2 cups mashed bananas (3-4 very ripe bananas)
2 cups of sugar
1/2 cup vegetable oil
4 eggs
1 bag of chocolate chips
*Or use Pamela’s baking mix and eliminate the next four ingredients.
Heat oven to 350 degrees and grease bottoms of two 9x5x3 loaf pans. If not using a premade baking mix, combine flour, xanthan gum, cider vinegar, baking soda, and salt in mixing bowl; blend well with an electric mixer on low speed. Beat bananas separately in a large mixing bowl, then add all the ingredients except chocolate chips to the bananas and beat on low speed for 1 minute.
Fold in chocolate chips and pour mixture evenly into pans. Bake for about 50-60 minutes or until a wooden toothpick comes out clean. Cool for 10 minutes then remove from pans to cool completely. If you are making muffins, bake for 20 minutes, testing doneness with a toothpick.
Relax in an all-natural moisturizing detox bath that soothes dry skin while you de-stress. This bath soak has the beautiful look and feel of fresh snow PLUS it leaves skin feeling silky soft and promotes better sleep.
Magnesium Sulfate: Popularly known as Epsom Salt. Magnesium is used for treating anxiety, chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS), Lyme disease, fibromyalgia, leg cramps, migraine headaches, premenstrual syndrome (PMS), restless leg syndrome, skin infections and more.
Sodium Bicarbonate: Popularly known as Baking Soda. Sodium bicarbonate makes bath water alkaline which soothes irritated skin, relieves pain or itching, and leaves the skin feeling silky.
Virgin Coconut Oil: Virgin coconut oil is pressed from the “meat” of the coconut. It has a high content of lanauric acid which is anti-viral, anti-fungal, and anti-bacterial. It aids in skin healing and moisturizing.
Sweet Almond Oil: Almond oil is pressed from edible almonds. It is rich in Vitamin E, monounsaturated fatty acids, and proteins plus minerals and vitamins. It is good for moisturizing and healing skin.
Essential Oils:
Lemon Essential Oil is distilled from the peel of the lemon. It is high in d-limonene, a powerful antioxidant. Lemon oil is nourishing to the skin, improves mood, and supports the immune system.
Peppermint Essential Oil is derived from the leaves of the peppermint plant. It helps increase blood flow to the skin, is muscle-soothing, and has a mentally relaxing effect
Rosemary Essential Oil is distilled from the fresh flowering tops of the fragrant evergreen plant. It is used to stimulate blood circulation, relieve headaches and muscle aches, reduce stress, and boost the immune system.
This all-natural moisturizing detox bath soothes dry skin while raising magnesium levels to aid in de-stressing. This bath soak leaves skin feeling silky soft and supple and promotes better sleep.
Whisk together the melted coconut oil and almond oil.
Stir in essential oils. (10-20 drops lemon, 10-20 drops rosemary, 20-40 drop peppermint)
Add Epsom salts and baking soda, and stir to combine.
The bath salts will have the texture of fresh snow.
Store in an air-tight jar.
HOW TO TAKE A MOISTURIZING DETOX BATH
Take a magnesium bath at night just before going to bed for best results. The magnesium will help you relax while the moisturizing ingredients soothe and soften skin.
To prepare a bath: Fill the tub with hot water. Add the Magnesium Detox Bath salts then soak for 20-30 minutes. Add music, candles, a good book or an interesting podcast to make bath time more enjoyable.
Make sure to have a cold glass of drinking water within reach to rehydrate during the bath. After soaking pat dry and go to bed.
DETOX BATH WARNINGS
If you have any medical conditions or take prescription medicines you should consult with your doctor before taking a moisturizing detox bath. Hot bath water can cause dehydration and dizziness. You should drink lots of water while taking a detox bath and never take a detox bath when using drugs or alcohol.
Enjoy!
It sounds very easy to make and it’s great that you can make 5 baths worth per batch. Makes a great gift too.
This DIY is easy, super quick to get done with, and also at the comfort of your own kitchen platform to relieve your eyes of all the exhaustion and also to get rid of the dullness around the eyes.
Carrot (Known for its discoloration properties, carrot juice would help you get rid of the darkness and dullness around eyes)
Cucumber (Known for its cooling properties, cucumber would help in distressing your eyes giving them a relaxed effect)
Raw Milk (Known for its anti-tan properties, milk has always come handy in getting rid of dark circles around eyes)
Rose water (For the relaxation it provides to tired eyes)
Round Cotton Pads
Grater
To make the Eye Pads:
Grate about a teaspoon full of carrot in a bowl
Now, add some grated cucumber to the carrot.
To this mixture, add about a teaspoon full of raw milk (unheated).
Now, add a teaspoon full of rose water to this.
Now let this mixture rest for about 20 minutes to let the carrot and cucumber soak properly in the milk and rose water mixture.
Now, squeeze out the carrot and cucumber pulp and put the juice in a separate bowl.
Now, take the cotton pads separate the two sheets of cotton, and spread a thin layer of the pulp onto one side of the cotton.
Now take about a teaspoon of the juice extract and spread it over the thin layer.
Now, make a sandwich by closing the thin layer sheet with its other cotton sheet.
You have homemade eye pads ready with all the goodness of natural ingredients which will not only relax your eyes but will also deal with the dark circles and the dullness of your eyes.
I hope you enjoy this easy-to-make self-care treat and remember you are worth it! Self-care is mental health care.
This gentle body wash is great for sensitive skin because it’s made with coconut oil and aloe vera gel, making it extra soothing. It’s also super refreshing and the cooling effect of mint is a great way to start the day.
Whisk together all the ingredients until completely combined. Use a funnel to pour the body wash into your container of choice. I like to use one with a pump handle to make this soap easier to use, as it’s thinner than store-bought body wash. This body wash will separate between uses because no binders or stabilizers are included. Simply shake it together before each use.
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week we highlight the blog of Live & Learning.
I grew up in Ootischenia, a small town in British Columbia, Canada – population of 500. I grew up fishing, playing hockey and tormenting my younger brothers. Under firm parental guidance, I learned the “life trades” of discipline, work ethic and execution. Fast forward more than 20 years of working and leading in large U.S. companies. A learner.
I have followed David for years, interviewed him twice and his photography will blow your mind! He can be funny and their dog, Wally writes the best post.
Live & Learn is a site on many topics and tons of photos you have to see. David has inspired me for years. I bet you will want to follow him.
Add all the dry ingredients to a large, non-metallic bowl and whisk until blended. Drop the essential oils on the dry ingredients, and stir to combine. The essential oils can create droplets, which will dissolve in the following step.
Spray the mixture with a little water and incorporate it immediately to avoid a reaction. If you don’t have a spray bottle, sprinkle water on the mixture using a teaspoon.
Put on nitrile gloves to protect your hands when kneading the mixture as the citric acid can irritate sensitive skin and nail polish. The mixture should feel like damp sand and be wet enough to hold its shape when pressed together. If using a colored mica and dried herbs or flowers, add them to the mixture.
Fill the silicone mold with the mixture, and press firmly into the mold using your fingertips, paying attention to the edges. Let the mixture dry for 24-48 hours. Making shower steamers can be affected by the humidity; in a humid environment, the drying time may be longer. When they feel hard and solid, carefully peel back the mold and gently pop out of the disk. Store the steamers in an airtight container or jar, and ensure that the steamers aren’t exposed to water or moisture. The shelf life is one year.
Before use, let warm water run for several minutes to moisturize the air. It’s best to place the steamer away from the running water and the drain. Ideally, only the bottom of the tabs should be wet. You can also put a shower steamer in a soap dish. Breathe in deeply as the essential oils vaporize.
This moisturizing scrub helps to alleviate dry skin during the cold winter months, and the grapefruit and frankincense essential oils provide an invigorating scent. The recipe fills approximately 10, 4-ounce jars and fits perfectly into a stocking or is a thoughtful teacher gift.
Add water, white vinegar, and vegetable glycerin to a large jar. Close the lid and shake vigorously. Add the essential oils. Close the lid and shake again. Add cotton quilting squares or washcloths, and you’re done. Be sure to shake the jar and wring out the cloth before adding them to your load of laundry.
Note
Essential oils last longer in dark glass containers. Since I reused a clear jar, I store my dryer sheets in a dark place to extend shelf life.
The basics of human nutrition are much the same for everyone. The practicalities of achieving good nutrition can, however, vary widely according to your age and lifestyle. With that in mind, here are some tips to help you understand nutrition for older adults.
Food is basically fuel for your body. From babyhood through puberty, your body needs food for mental and physical development. As an adult in your prime, you need food to fuel your lifestyle. This is likely to be at least moderately active.
As a senior, however, your activity levels are going to be lower than they were. Even if you keep yourself super-fit for your age, you’re still not going to be able to take the sort of vigorous exercise you could when you were younger. Your appetite will probably drop to reflect this.
The key point to take away is that the less food you eat, the more important it is that what you do eat delivers maximum nourishment. Of course, you can still have the occasional treat. For the most part, however, you really need to focus on nutrient-rich food.
Your food needs to have more of an impact
Your ability to perceive color, texture, and scent can decrease as you age. Medications can also interfere with it. This can negatively impact your ability to taste food. In the past, dental issues could make it more difficult to chew or swallow. Modern dental care means that this is much less of an issue. It can, however, still be a consideration.
This means that meals for seniors generally need to be full of contrast, strong textures, and lively scents. Older people often enjoy food with plenty of herbs and spices. This may come as a surprise if you hated them when you were younger.
Making all this happen while maintaining nutritional value can be very challenging. It’s likely to be particularly difficult if you live alone. This can lead to older people skipping meals, which can bring all kinds of problems. Batch cooking is one potential solution to this issue. It may, however, be more convenient to use DeliverLean CARE.
You need to be careful with salt and sugar
Adding salt and sugar can be a quick way to pep up a meal. Unfortunately, neither is a particularly healthy approach even when you’re a younger adult. The impact on seniors can be even worse. Salt can impair your kidney function. Sugar is empty calories and can lead to dental issues.
You must get plenty of fiber
Fiber plays a huge role in keeping your digestive system healthy. It’s important for everyone and particularly important for seniors. In simple terms, if your digestive system gets out of sorts, it will almost certainly impact your whole body. This can create a downward spiral and that can be especially dangerous for older adults.
Calcium and protein help keep you strong
Calcium is the building material for bones, teeth, and nails. Protein is the building material for muscle. You need to make sure to get plenty of both to maintain your strength and vigor in your later years.
I love deviled eggs at every holiday meal. They are simple to make or will last in the refrigerator for 3 days. What a relief, something you can cook ahead of any meal.
Recipe from Kristin Cavallari’s cookbook True Comfort
You will need
12 eggs
6 tb vegan mayo
1 tsp yellow mustard
4 tsp Sriracha
Pink Himalayan salt
Fresh ground pepper
How to make
Bring a large pot of water and boil eggs for 13 minutes. Remove and run the eggs under cold water to cool them.
Cut the eggs in half lengthwise and scoop the yolks into a medium bowl.
Set the sites aside
Add the mayo, mustard, Sriracha, and a big pinch of salt and a pinch of pepper to the yokes
Mix well
Spoon the yoke mixture into each cavity in the whites
Serve right away or the eggs will last 3 days in the fridge covered up
I’m so glad you’ve joined me this week for another edition of Weekend Music Share.
Melinda
Welcome back to Weekend Music Share, the place where everyone can share their favorite music.
Feel free to use the Weekend Music Share banner in your post, and use the hashtag #WeekendMusicShare on social media so other participants can find your post.
Children love being outdoors, and allowing them to do that promotes a wide range of skills they can use later in life such as gardening, appreciating nature, and also roleplay. Your children mean everything to you and as a parent, you want to do everything in your power to protect them. So when it comes to creating a safe space in your garden, you’ll want to rest assured that if you need to nip to the bathroom or cook their dinner that they aren’t doing to hurt themselves. This dread can be made worse by things in your garden that they could potentially hurt themselves on.
With that in mind, let’s take a look at how you can make sure your garden is child-friendly so they can continue to learn and thrive – without you being constantly worried.
Put up safety fences
A parent’s worst nightmare is the thought of their child wandering off out of the safety of the garden. If you don’t already, put up some safety fences with a lockable gate to ensure their safety.
This doesn’t just mean the perimeter of your property either, put up safety fences around ponds and flower beds to prevent them from falling in and hurting themselves.
Remove anything dangerous they may pick up
Whether you’ve just moved in and noticed a lot of animal muck, or your pets have had free reign for a while, the last thing you want is for your children to accidentally pick them up or even worse, get it anywhere near their faces. Using a company like Swoop Scoop not only prevents you from the nasty job of clearing this up but also ensures that nothing is missed. While a bit of dirt never did anyone any harm, children shouldn’t pick feces up.
Switch to rounded furniture
If your kids run wild when they’re in the garden, you’re probably constantly flinching when they go anywhere near any sharp-cornered furniture. To avoid this issue altogether, switch to rounded garden furniture.
If this isn’t an expense you can afford, you can add corner protectors to your furniture to prevent any serious damage. And of course, you could ban that area of the garden, but we know what kids are like!
Have a large grassed area
All kids love rolling around outside, but if your garden is paved or has lots of stones, you may be worried your children might hurt themselves. Consider contacting a turf company to create a grassed area for your children to enjoy and eliminate this worry.
Lock all harmful things away
Finally, while this may seem obvious if you have items in your garden that you still want to enjoy but may be harmful, buy a shed to lock them away when the children are playing. These could be items like garden ornaments, BBQs, potentially dangerous garden furniture, or even garden tools. Locking them away will give you the peace of mind that when your children are playing, they’re going to be as safe as possible.
When I sent you and Granny a balloon-a-gram, you sat on the floor for photos with the balloons and we laughed so hard. That is one memory among many I cherish.
Granny had Dementia and she hid her wedding ring. We looked for months after her death, we searched the house looking and one day I found it in a crumpled tissue. She didn’t lose it on purpose, who knows what she was thinking. I called you to the room and we both were thrilled and we cried.
While cleaning out another drawer, I found every card you had given her, you’re not one to cry but I could tell you were shocked and sentimental. He looked at them probably thinking about Granny. I was jumping with joy and we both cried.
You took great care of Granny and even after she needed hospice, and I know it was hard. I would stay with her while you were running errands and saw her get more violent when you were gone or outside.
We had so much fun going down to the levees to teach me how to parallel park. That was the part of the driving test I failed. When I was very young, I would sit on your lap pretending to drive the truck.
You were always looking after me. The rules were strict and I needed structure, true love, and positive vibes. You only raised your voice one time. You were painting the ceiling and I told you I would wait on the porch until my ride came. You didn’t hear me and thought I left the house without telling you. When I came home you were telling Granny. You talked to me in a normal tone telling me to never leave the house without telling. Granny came to the rescue by calming you down and reminding you I did tell him. End of story.
I admire how important family was to you. With 13 siblings, you spent time with all of them. I even met your parents, they had antique iron headboards which is probably why I fell in love with them.
I miss you every day and learned life lessons from you. You will always be my father.
I’ve never attended a Diwali Celebration but would love to. I’ve seen snapshots of the celebration and it looks like so much fun. The key is Diwali honors the Hindu goddess of wealth, Lakshmi. Celebrating under the lights seems appropriate.
Here’s the official explanation of Diwali
The word Diwali (or Deepavali as it’s sometimes called) means “row of lights” in an Ancient language of India, called Sanskrit. During this festival, people decorate their homes with lights and oil lamps, called diyas.
For many people, Diwali honors the Hindu goddess of wealth, Lakshmi. The lights and lamps are said to help Lakshmi find her way into peoples’ homes, bringing prosperity in the year to come!
It’s also a celebration of good triumphing over evil, and different legends based on this theme are associated with Diwali. In northern India, Hindus celebrate the return of the deities (gods) Rama and Sita to the city of Ayodhya, after defeating the evil king Ravana!
I hope you’re surrounded by family and friends enjoying the major celebration.
In a perfect world, wars would not happen, but the reality is if you look back in time, we’ve been fighting since the beginning. It is a crazy time in the world and you can bet the Military is working hard to keep Americans safe.
It can be hard for some people to understand the strategic reasons why we are supporting two wars when they are working to make ends meet. I understand why we are at war in Gaza/Iseral and Ukraine but the reality of war is people die, it gets ugly. there’s no cease fire, you shoot to kill.
I grew up with many Veterans in my family and raised by my Grandparents who survived the WWW 2. I will never be able to repay all the Veterans who fought for me and you but know I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your sacrifices.
Explanation For Holiday
Veterans Day continues to be observed on November 11, regardless of what day of the week on which it falls. The restoration of the observance of Veterans Day to November 11 not only preserves the historical significance of the date, but helps focus attention on the important purpose of Veterans Day: A celebration to honor America’s veterans for their patriotism, love of country, and willingness to serve and sacrifice for the common good.
The next time you see a Veteran, thank them, sit with them and if’s your personality give them big hugs!
Another way you can support a 501c charity is to support Veterans. During Desert Storm, I was traveling 5-6 days a week and spent plenty of time at the airport. I would see troops leaving in groves, my eyes would water up and very often I would hug them.
There are several Veteran’s charities you can support. One of my personal concerns is the number of homeless Veterans so I support a charity that works on the ground helping, not an Advocate Charity.
How did so many become homeless? The most important issue for me is repaying the Veterans by getting them in to house or a group home. Veterans need Mental Heath support, PTSD, possible retraining for a job or addiction/alcoholic support. America failed to support them and help them long-term. It’s makes me mad as hell.
Leeks are a great side dish and are healthy. This dish is simple and doesn’t take long to cook, the perfect dish this holiday season. Best yet, it’s Gluten-Free.
Cut the leeks in half lengthwise. Rinse them liberally under cold water, removing all the dirt and sand from them while keeping the halves intact. Pat them dry.
Place leeks cut side up in a medium baking dish. Coat them with the olive oil and season with 2 big pinches of salt and 1 big pinch of pepper.
Roast until they are tender and golden brown, 35 minutes, and serve immediately.
Serves 4
I have more recipes and DIY projects on the way. Right now I’m working on a Pumpkin Spice Latte recipe.
Enjoy!
Melinda
The recipe is from Kristin Cavallari’s cookbook True Comfort
This year has been turbulent, to say the least. The risk of illness, and losing your job, it’s enough to make the calmest of people feel stressed and anxious inside.
Everyone has undoubtedly experienced struggles this year, your friends included. And so, if you’re wondering what thoughtful gifts to buy this year to cheer up your closest, the solution lies in getting them something that will help bring on relaxation. And below, we’ve got just the ticket, in the form of 10 gift ideas to consider giving this year.
Pajamas are the ultimate pieces of clothing associated with relaxation and sleep. Gift your friend some super-soft pajamas to snuggle into this Christmas, and you’re sure to increase their comfort and make them feel more relaxed in an instant.
Vape Pen
Vape pens such as bloom farms rose gold highlighter are a sleek and handy gift for your friends who like to vape. Don’t forget to add CBD solutions to the present, too (CBD calms nerves and anxiety).
Weighted Blanket
Find a snuggly blanket for your friend, preferably one that feels heavy. Heavy blankets help to reduce anxiety in sufferers because they emulate the feeling of a big warm hug.
Lavender Oil
Lavender oil is an essential oil that can help your best friend unwind. Lavender is a natural sleep aid, which can tempt over-thinkers and anxious friends to sleep with ease.
Dark Chocolate
Chocolate will never go down a miss with anyone. The delicious edible is also proven to positively impact a person’s well-being, improving their mood and immunity.
Therapy Putty
Therapy putty is the perfect gift for your friend who needs stress relief on the go. Squishing therapy putty between your fingers is great for reducing stress levels and can help your friend feel more at ease.
Journal
Stress and anxiety strike at any moment. Often at inconvenient times when there’s no one around to talk to, to help rationalize and organize their thoughts. As a remedy, gift a journal to your overthinking friend so that they can write down what they feel when you’re not around to listen.
Plant
A few indoor plants are well-known for reducing stress. Greenery, in general, is excellent for your well-being. Snake and basil plants have calming properties that put their owners at ease. If your friend has office space at home, suggest they pop it on their desk to help them manage their stress throughout the day.
Bath Bomb
A scented bath bomb will encourage your friend to use your gift by taking a hot bath, which is all part of your ploy to help them relieve stress.
Candle
A soothing aroma can make a world of difference to how we feel. And having flickering candles around the room is relaxing to see. From tea lights to a large Yankee candle, there are a lot of candles out there that would make an ideal relaxing gift for your friend.
Suppose your friend is going through a rough patch or seems particularly down or stressed as of late. You don’t need to wait until Christmas to send them one of the thoughtful gifts above. For most of the ideas above you can order online and get sent directly to your friend. It’s just a case of picking your gifts and shipping them over.
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series. I’ve enjoyed sharing their site with you. This week we highlight the blog of Cindy Knoke.
My closest neighbors are coyotes (packs and packs of them and they are HUNGRY), rattlers (lots and lots of them and they are MEAN), and free range cows/bulls (the bulls aren’t too friendly either).
Forget cell phones. They don’t work out here. Forget GPS, it misdirects. It’s best not to wander too much out here, the people (and their dogs) are kinda twitchy.
To reach The Holler turn right at the reeking chicken farm, proceed down a bunch of pot-holed semi-streets/dirt roads, past the abandoned refrigerators and occupied old RV’s and then things get kinda dicey.
My friends usual reaction to the trip to The Holler is, “You’ve got to be kidding!” Or, “Next time let’s meet half way.”
I have known Cindy for many years, she’s kind, smart, loves to travel, and is an excellent photographer.
I had a conversation with my Therapist about healing from trauma recently. I asked her, if a traumatic memory is triggered and there is no emotion or pain associated with it does that mean it’s not traumatic anymore. She explained that the memory is still traumatic until I attach a memory to it.
Everyone has trauma in their life. It could be the death of a loved one, a horrific car accident, losing your job, or any other trauma you can think of including chronic illnesses. Many people push the trauma down and go about their business. When I was younger most of my worst traumas were in a box. It’s a survival method and not the recommended way to heal!
I started seeing my Therapist 30 years ago, and we’ve slowly talked through most of my trauma. Healing is a slow process but a necessary one. I’m sharing my slimmed-down description of the process. Healing also includes self-care, lots of self-care, and giving yourself grace.
Healing Process
The first step is acknowledging the trauma.
You need to talk to a Therapist about the trauma in great detail. This can be difficult which means you may talk about one trauma for a month or more.
Once you’ve talked through the trauma it’s easy to think you’re healed. Not so.
The final step to healing is taking each trauma and adding emotion to it. This is a tough part. You have to mentally go back to the trauma and feel the emotion felt at the time and process it.
She reminded me that I had to relive the trauma and feel the emotion. I didn’t have to think about it, I’m not going back. Why? My daily life is not affected, the memories rarely come up, if at all, and I can deal with that. In the future, if a memory hits hard and stays with me, I will take the next step.
We all deserve to live our best life and you have to make your own decisions. You’re in charge, if you are not ready to talk, don’t talk. Please know that all traumatic memories stay with you until you process them. Once you are ready to talk, go at your own speed, healing is no marathon.
At times of trauma and stress, individuals may turn to drugs and alcohol as a coping mechanism in an attempt to ease pain or escape overwhelming emotions related to their experiences. While such substances may provide temporary relief, reliance on substances often complicates healing journeys further, leading to further emotional and physical problems. Recognizing such tendencies is key, as this allows individuals to explore healthier coping strategies. Getting assistance from professionals such as therapists, support groups, and facilities like Woburn Addiction Treatment may lead to more constructive routes toward healing while stressing that healthy alternatives exist despite the challenges you experience.
To achieve healing of any type, you have to feel positive toward your Therapist in order to build trust in them. It may take seeing several before meeting a person you click with. Once you trust them, stay with them.
My version of healing from trauma may sound easy but I assure you it’s not. My mother left me in the bathtub at six months old and went downstairs to talk with my Granny before being asked where I was. The trauma builds from there and I survived with the help of my Grandparents and my Therapist.
The process of dealing with trauma can bring up other unpleasant emotions relating to these memories, such as anxiety. Going back and reliving events from the past prevents you from repressing them as you normally would. It feels like blood-letting while you’re doing it, but it is also one of those things that’s essential. If you don’t go through it (preferably with the help of a therapist), it’ll all stay inside you and you won’t get better.
Even if you’re not ready to deal with the tough stuff, there are many benefits to having a Therapist to talk to. My Therapist has helped me deal with so much more than trauma.
Blue Moon Daisy
lookingforthelight.blog 