National Suicide Prevention Month

The topic of suicide is not the easiest conversation but one that is often important. One misconception is that only people with mental illness commit suicide and that is far from the truth. People commit suicide for many reasons and they are deeply personal, like the person dying of cancer and in immense pain or someone who has a chronic health condition that is debilitating and greatly limits their ability to take care of themselves or leave the house. There are many reasons people get deeply depressed and look to suicide as a way out. Yes, there are people with mental illness who commit suicide but I think the media has a role in highlighting these deaths over the other circumstances. Those types of stories get more traffic and unfortunately, keep the stigma alive.

Although I feel that you can’t stop a person determined to commit suicide, I do believe the strategies used long before the person reaches that point are critical and can save lives. 

Here are the CDC’s recommended strategies to prevent suicide

I have a serious mental illness, Treatment-Resistant Bipolar Disorder and it can be difficult to manage, it takes a village and commitment on my part to keep my mood stable. The first time I tried to commit suicide was at nine years old, it wasn’t due to my illness it was due to the abuse and living in a house with Domestic Violence. It’s hard to watch your mother get beaten to a pulp almost daily even if you hate her. I’ve tried many other times and got close a few times all for the same reason.

The suicidal thoughts and plans from my Bipolar Disorder are different in that the Black Dog can sneak up on you slowly and before you realize it, you’re down the rabbit hole. Fortunately, I’ve been aware enough to call my Psychiatrist and to tell my husband. That’s when I know it’s time to visit the Psych Hospital. There are many treatments Psychiatrists can use to help you when you’re at the bottom and can’t see the light. The technology has advanced so much even since I had my first ECT treatment, for which I’ve had 27, six last summer. The great news is there are other treatments now that are proven and cause less memory loss.

My father committed suicide in 1992 and it came as no surprise in that he told me for months he was going to kill himself. My father and I were estranged since I was a teen and yet he started calling me months before he died. I begged, cried, tried to reason, and even paid his bills for a couple of months thinking the financial relief might help. The bottom line is, you can not stop someone who is determined to commit suicide. My father was mentally ill and refused to go to the doctor, his decision and he fell too far down to even think of living. The key point here is that you can’t stop someone who is determined to commit suicide. I’m not saying don’t try, try like hell but you have to accept the facts and not carry the quilt around.

I carried that quilt for seven years before I sought out a Therapist to help me work through the pain and childhood trauma. I didn’t seek help for my Bipolar Disorder until after my father’s death. While reading about his disorder I read that 75% of children of parents who commit suicide will as well. That woke me up! It wasn’t easy, in fact, it was very difficult because medicine after medicine didn’t work. It was very frustrating but I had the greatest Psychiatrist and we finally found a protocol that worked. It was tweaked many times because the medications would stop working but he had enough history on me that he could react quickly to build another protocol. This rebuilding of medication protocols is a part of my disease and one I’m used to. After 32 years, I’m better equipped to explain what is happening and how I feel which helps get to a better treatment faster. Even though I talk quite a bit about mental illness there are many reasons people without a mental illness commit suicide.

The only words of wisdom I can part with is to pay attention to a person’s change in behavior, often you will see one. One example is, hurriedly someone gets all their chores done, cleans the house, and returns items borrowed. That’s called getting things in order and is a good indicator they plan to commit suicide. I encourage you to read more about why people commit suicide to acquaint yourself, just make sure you don’t over-focus. The last thing you want to do is push hard on someone who is feeling suicidal or has a plan. It’s a natural reaction, I know but they can shut you out.

If you are feeling suicidal or have questions you can reach out to these resources:

Veterans Crisis Line: 1-800-273-8255 press 1 

Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255

http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org 

The Jed Foundation

Project Sanctuary

The Trevor Project

NAMI

National SuicidePreventionLifeline.org 1-800-273-TALK (8255) Press 1, Veterans Crisis Line USA Press 2, Se Habla Español LifeLine Chat

Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: 988 

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233

National Hopeline Network: 1-800-SUICIDE (800-784-2433)

Crisis Text Line: Text “DESERVE” TO 741-741

Lifeline Crisis Chat (Online live messaging): https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat/

Self-Harm Hotline: 1-800-DONT CUT (1-800-366-8288)

Essential local and community services: 211, https://www.211.org/

American Association of Poison Control Centers: 1-800-222-1222

National Council on Alcoholism & Drug Dependency Hope Line: 1-800-622-2255

National Crisis Line – Anorexia and Bulimia: 1-800-233-4357

GLBT Hotline: 1-888-843-4564

TREVOR Crisis Hotline: 1-866-488-7386

AIDS Crisis Line: 1-800-221-7044

Veterans Crisis Line: https://www.veteranscrisisline.net

TransLifeline: https://www.translifeline.org – 877-565-8860

Melinda  

Reference:

CDC.gov