Thank you for joining me for this week’s Friday Quote.

Melinda
Thank you for joining me for this week’s Friday Quote.

Melinda
In this fast-paced social media world, finding time to look within or back in time can be difficult. I hope you find these quotes and questions interesting. I’m so glad you stopped by today!
An ordinary life can be extraordinary; there is beauty in IMPERFECTION, and the magic can be found in the everyday.
Melinda
Willow & Sage by Stampington.com
Yields 3 Tins
Bowl: small
4 1/2 TB brown sugar
1 tsp. gingerbread spice/ground cinnamon
1 1/2 TB fractionated coconut oil
Spoon
Storage tins: 0.5 oz (3)
Sprinkles: gingerbread man (optional)
In a small bowl, add brown sugar, ground spices/cinnamon, and coconut oil, and mix until the ingredients are well blended. Pack the holiday lip scrub into storage tins. Decorate with gingerbread man sprinkles if desired.
Sounds yummy and sends you into Winter and the holiday season. Would make great gifts.
Melinda
I’m glad you joined me on Wordless Wednesday and I hope to see you soon.
These are a few of my favorite ornaments. The Santa in the first photo is made of sterling silver and I forgot who designed it. The other ornaments are made by hand with European glass by Christopher Radko.
Melinda
https://www.christopherradko.com/pages/how-we-make-our-ornaments
The family cookbook contains recipes my Grandparents used and the type of food I grew up on: good ole Southern food like dumplings and pecan pie.
What You Need
1/4 ts. vanilla
3 eggs
1 cup sugar
3 tbs. flour
1/2 stick butter or margarine
3/4 cup white Karo
1 cup pecan’s chopped

How To Make
Sprinkle pecans in the bottom of unbaked pie crust
Add filling
Bake at 300 degrees for about an hour
In a bowl add together all of the ingredients except for chopped pecans. Let the butter/margarine get soft before adding
Sprinkle pecans in the bottom of unbaked pie crust
Add filling
Bake at 300 degrees for about an hour
One of the most important things is not to overcook. Take the pie out when there is only a small part in the middle that shakes
I’ve made this Pecan Pie so many times, it’s easy and delicious.
This is a great pie year-round, but it was always on the table at the holidays.
Melinda
Repost
If you crave creamy foods but don’t care for or can’t eat dairy, these vegan substitutes for heavy cream will help.
“Cashews are frequently used in dairy-free products because they provide a texture similar to dairy without tasting like a nut,” Shaw says. “Cashew cream can easily be made with cashews, water, and salt.” If you can’t eat nuts, pureed white beans work similarly.
Once blended, this combo mimics the higher fat content that gives heavy cream its thick, silky texture and taste. Shaw says-but it’s not a one-for-one substitute, so you’ll have to add it in stages until you get the consistency you’re looking for.
It’s like a thicker, creamier coconut milk, and you’ll want to buy it sweetened or unsweetened depending on what you are using it for. If you can’t find it or already have full-fat coconut milk on hand, you can DIY it. “Place the coconut milk can upside down in the fridge overnight, then drain to remove the milk solids. Place the solids in a chilled bowl and whip with a hand or stand mixer until light and fluffy.” Shaw says.
“This combination is a great alternative and can be made by blending equal parts of each-plus, it boosts the protein of your recipe,” saw Shaw. It’s also lower in fat than heavy cream but still delivers the vibe you’re looking for.
Enjoy!
Melinda
Repost
2024 has been a difficult year for David and me health-wise. There are still unresolved health issues from my visit to The Mayo Clinic for which I have several specialists to see in 2025. The most difficult has been that David was diagnosed with three types of cancer this year. The first was CLL Leukemia, Skin Cancer, and most recently Small Cell Lymphocytic Lymphoma. It is common for Skin Cancer to follow Leukemia but the Lymphoma was quite a surprise. Leukemia and Lymphoma are two different cancers and very alarming to me. We’re still waiting to see if radiation treatment is the next step.
We don’t focus on it or the future, we rarely talk about it except after doctor appointments. We focus on the blessings we have and live life for tomorrow.
We know God has a plan for each of us and we are cool with his plan.
Melinda
Sadness is a temporary state that often has a clear cause, like a big disappointment, the loss of someone close to you, or bad news from someone you love.
This type of sadness can fluctuate throughout the day. In certain moments, the emotional burden might feel particularly heavy. You might cry often, feel numb or drained, and struggle to concentrate.
At other times — when you get lost in something you enjoy or when a loved one distracts you — your sorrow may seem light enough that you can barely feel its weight. While it might linger in some form for days or weeks, it generally begins to ease naturally.
Persistent sadness is something else entirely. It can wrap around you like a heavy blanket, muffling the sensations and joy of everyday life. This sadness can leave you feeling low, empty, and defeated. You don’t know what caused your unhappiness, so you have no idea how to start feeling better.
Feeling sad isn’t at all unusual. After all, sorrow is a normal human response to disappointment and loss. Sadness that doesn’t have a clear reason behind it and doesn’t seem to improve, however, may suggest something else is going on.
While not everyone with depression will feel sad, unexplainable sadness you can’t seem to shake is one of the primary signs of depression.
If your sadness does relate to depression, you’ll likely feel sad nearly all of the time — almost every day, for most of each day, for a period of 2 weeks or longer. Sadness, in other words, seems to become a constant companion.
With depression, you’ll experience other symptoms, too. If several of the signs below accompany your sad or tearful mood, there’s a good chance you’re dealing with depression:
Chronic sadness, especially when related to depression, might also prompt regular thoughts of death or suicide. Even if you don’t have a plan to act on these thoughts, it’s always best to talk to someone you trust and get support right away (more on how to do this later).
You might begin to notice your feelings of sadness, along with any other symptoms you experience, follow a specific pattern. Depression can take different forms, and various underlying factors can have an impact on the way your symptoms show up.
A few things to look for:
People living with bipolar disorder often experience episodes of depression as part of a cycle that also includes episodes of mania or hypomania.
You might notice you suddenly feel intensely happy, even euphoric. This abrupt change in mood might also involve:
This episode might last a week, or longer.
Somewhere around 40 percentTrusted Source of people with bipolar disorder have what’s known as mixed features. You could experience sadness and other symptoms of depression at the same time as mania.
This combination of symptoms can make it harder to understand what you’re experiencing, which could add to your distress.
Maybe your sadness seems to arrive or intensify around the same time of year the days begin to shorten. Once the longer, sunnier days of spring and summer arrive, you feel better, year after year.
It’s pretty common to feel a little low in autumn and winter. The nights get long and cold, and there are plenty of days when you may not even see the sun.
If this seasonal sadness persists and becomes serious enough to affect daily life, you could have seasonal affective disorder (SAD), a type of depression that occurs along with seasonal changes.
Along with other common depression symptoms, you might also notice:
To read the complete article here.
There are many reasons we feel sad, and luckily, there’s a wealth of knowledge to help you navigate. My first step would be to call your doctor.
Melinda
A creative project is a great way to focus your mind and spend some downtime. Art, gardening, craft, and DIY are all very therapeutic. You’ll feel more relaxed and gain some perspective. Creativity is the perfect way to channel stress and anxiety. Put your overactive mind to good use and make something you’ll cherish forever. There are plenty of different kinds of ideas depending on your interests. Here are five creative projects to help focus your mind.
Paint by Numbers is an example of a trendy craft gone viral during lockdown. It is incredibly therapeutic and relaxing, and not just for kids anymore. Even though you’re following instructions, it still requires a lot of patience and hard work. Paint by numbers is a good compromise if you like art but aren’t necessarily an experienced painter. You’ll be able to enjoy the results without being a natural artist. You can display your painting proudly for all your family and friends.
There are several reasons why gardening is so therapeutic. It’s a great way to get back in touch with nature and gain some perspective. Sun and fresh air also go a long way. Even when the seasons start to change, this doesn’t mean you have to be a fair-weather garden. There are plenty of winter flowers you can plant such as pansies and jasmine that grow all year round. If you want to keep it inside you could even build your own mini zen garden, or decorate the house with plants.
If you’re the type that likes to get your hands dirty then why not sink yourself into a project in the garage? Customize your car to your liking this fall. Automotive Stuff is an example of a site where you can find your own parts. You can even trade car parts online with other car owners. If you prefer, start small with the interior, or even work under the hood. If you’re passionate about cars you could invest in a used vehicle to revamp.
You’d be surprised how many simple products you can make at home. All you need is some essential oils and a couple of household ingredients, and you can make a variety of bath products. This is a more eco-friendly option as well, not to mention thrifty. If you want to use your creativity to make something you’re going to use, then bath products are ideal. You can even give them as gifts to your family and friends.
Whether you decide to flip the furniture or keep it, it’s easy to see why upcycling has become such a popular pastime. You could invest in some second-hand furniture at your local thrift store and turn it into a creative project. For example, you could find an old photo frame, print your Domonique Rodgers NC State print, and hang it on the wall. Creating Upcycling is a fun way to revamp furniture or repurpose other items. Perhaps you can find a new use for some old things around the house. It’s very therapeutic and satisfying.
This a collaborative post.
Melinda
Repost
Thank you for joining me for this week’s Friday Quote.

Melinda
My life without Foreigner would be an empty one. I love every tune and have had so many great memories with the tunes playing in the background.
It’s the weekend!!!!!!
I’m glad you joined me for another edition of Weekend Music Share this week.
Have a great weekend!
Melinda
Welcome back to Weekend Music Share, the place where everyone can share their favorite music.
Feel free to use the Weekend Music Share banner in your post, and use the hashtag #WeekendMusicShare on social media so other participants can find your post.
The media plays a role not only in misinformation about menopause but also in how it portrays women with menopause. Tune out the riff-raff and look for real answers. Menopause has been a woman’s curse long before I knew what it was and how it affected the lives of women. There are thousands of books on the market about menopause and I thought maybe it was time to look at the unconventional ways women deal with the debilitating symptoms.
Acupuncture involves inserting thin needles into specific points on the body to balance energy flow. Some women report reduced hot flashes, night sweats, and improved mood after regular sessions. While scientific evidence is mixed, it might be worth a try if you’re open to alternative therapies.
These practices can help manage stress, improve sleep, and enhance overall well-being. Yoga, in particular, can increase flexibility and strength, which is beneficial during menopause.
Adopting a diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and lean proteins can help manage symptoms. The Mediterranean diet, known for its anti-inflammatory properties, can be particularly beneficial.
This technique involves learning to control certain physiological functions, such as heart rate and muscle tension, with the help of a biofeedback device. It can be effective in managing stress and related symptoms.
Some studies suggest hypnotherapy can reduce the frequency and severity of hot flashes and improve sleep quality.
Remember, it’s essential to consult with a healthcare professional before starting any new treatments, especially if you have underlying health conditions.
Understanding the Connection Between Menopause and Heart Rate Changes
Why Does Menopause Increase Your Risk of Heart Disease?
Natural Treatments for Menopause Symptoms
Maybe you can find something that works for you or at least reduces the symptoms.
Melinda
Reference:
https://www.webmd.com/menopause/menopause-natural-treatments
This DIY is easy and super quick to do. It can also be done in the comfort of your own kitchen platform to relieve your eyes of all the exhaustion and get rid of the dullness around the eyes.
Carrot (Known for its discoloration properties, carrot juice would help you get rid of the darkness and dullness around eyes)
Cucumber (Known for its cooling properties, cucumber would help in distressing your eyes giving them a relaxed effect)
Raw Milk (Known for its anti-tan properties, milk has always come handy in getting rid of dark circles around eyes)
Rose water (For the relaxation it provides to tired eyes)
Round Cotton Pads
Grater
Grate about a teaspoon full of carrot in a bowl
Now, add some grated cucumber to the carrot.
Add about a teaspoon of raw milk (unheated) to this mixture.
Now, add a teaspoon full of rose water to this.
Now let this mixture rest for about 20 minutes to let the carrot and cucumber soak properly in the milk and rose water mixture.
Now, squeeze out the carrot and cucumber pulp and put the juice in a separate bowl.
Now, take the cotton pads separate the two sheets of cotton, and spread a thin layer of the pulp onto one side of the cotton.
Now take about a teaspoon of the juice extract and spread it over the thin layer.
Make a sandwich by closing the thin layer sheet with its other cotton sheet.
You have homemade eye pads ready with all the goodness of natural ingredients which will not only relax your eyes but will also deal with the dark circles and the dullness of your eyes.
I hope you enjoy this easy-to-make self-care treat and remember you are worth it! Self-care is mental health care.
Melinda
Repost
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week we highlight the blog Croatia, the War, and the Future. We have followed each other for several years and I have learned much from her. I’m not particularly interested in Croatian politics but her posts teach the history, and how Croatia has evolved.
M.
I remember you saying you worked with Vietnam Veterans, can you share a paragraph about your work?
I.
I guess Australia was not different to the USA when it came to Vietnam Veterans suffering PTSD and for many it became chronic and lifelong. I believe up to 30% of Vietnam Veterans suffered PTSD, some acute and relatively short term and for most it became chronic albeit in varying degrees of severity of symptoms between individuals. As a Clinical Psychologist in Sydney Australia, I worked in the Mental Health Hospital system mainly concentrating on disorder diagnostics and behaviour therapy in people with disabilities including dual diagnosis with mental illness as one of the two and cognitive impairment as the other. Outside my normal working hours, I also maintained into the late 1990’s a private psychological service through which I offered therapy and support to several Vietnam Veterans who had chronic PTSD and needed long-term support in order to maintain employment and family relationships at a good level. The purpose of my work was to reduce symptoms of PTSD especially concentrating on spousal relationship, which is an aspect of normal life that often suffers the most in PTSD sufferers and their spouses. Being useful in life, being and staying meaningfully employed and managing family and personal relationships were the main focus points to living with PTSD despite the horrors seen and experienced on the war front that haunt sufferers for decades.
M.
Are there other jobs you are extremely proud of?
I.
Paid jobs I am extremely proud of revolve around my roles as Manager and then CEO of disability services that focused on closing institutions in which people with disabilities lived and helping them move into normal houses in the community. This was achieved by early 1990’s in the state of New South Wales in Australia and I was so proud to have played a significant and instrumental role in this in Sydney. After that my job as CEO of government-funded disability services for more than two decades was to ensure that people with disabilities become a part of the normal community they live in, that human rights and anti-discrimination measures are in place and that access to everything a community life has to offer, with appropriate assistance, happens for them.
The unpaid job I am extremely proud of over the many years, which I applied myself to in my free time, was political activism and lobbying foreign governments from Australia to help Croatian people achieve independence from communist Yugoslavia. My family was one of hundreds of thousands families that in late 1950’s and early 1960’s, as applicable to my family, felt hard communist oppression to the point of being denied work because one did not accept the communist party, and consequently had no alternative in life but to emigrate from Yugoslavia in search of freedom and living life without fear. Australia offered a safe haven and “the sky is the limit” if you put your mind to it sort of opportunities in life. After in May 1991 almost 94% of voters in Croatia voted for independence at the referendum I became one of the most politically active women of Croatian origins in Australia (and Western-world-wide) with view to help Croatia achieve independence and win the was of aggression that was waged against her because people wanted independence from Yugoslavia and a rule of democracy, not communism, not socialism. Besides these activities I engaged relentlessly in fundraising for humanitarian aid, particularly for the many refugees, displaced, and children who had lost one or both parents in the war. I was and still am very proud of the two Medals of Honour I had received in 1995 from the President of Croatia for my exceptional and significant contribution to the Homeland War and the creation of the democratic and independent state of Croatia.
M.
Do you have a favorite post to share?
I.
https://inavukic.com/2013/09/11/croatian-hero-of-911-lt-anthony-jovic/
I guess the above post on 9/11 tragedy detail would be among my favourite posts because it holds within it the wonderful reality that people from all backgrounds and ethnic descents give their lives in efforts to save others no matter where they are or where they have grown up. And it this post it happens to be an American Croatian.
I am also quite partial to this post as it demonstrates bravery for an “adopted” country that after immigration becomes the second homeland.
https://inavukic.com/2013/11/11/war-veterans-in-u-s-a-of-croatian-descent/
Croatian Folklore Costume Culture in the Diaspora
I love seeing the national dress and culture of other countries. This post takes you there.
Melinda
Daily Om came to my attention last week and I want to share all the great low-fee courses with you. You can also sign up to receive Daily Inspirations via email. I’m not endorsing the company and have not taken any of their courses but many of the topics look right up my alley.
In 2004, Madisyn Taylor and Scott Blum founded DailyOM with a prescient vision: to bring the world together by offering inspirational messages delivered to your inbox each day. This groundbreaking vision launched DailyOM as one of the first spiritual newsletters on the internet.
Now, nearly twenty years later, DailyOM has grown from a small community of a few hundred subscribers into a thriving global wellness movement of over 3.5 million people dedicated to personal empowerment, growth, and transformation. As DailyOM has evolved, we’ve expanded our offerings to include a growing library of courses, information, and products. Whether it’s self-improvement, spirituality, health, or fitness, our team and worldwide community of teachers empower people to realize their potential in mind, body, spirit, and heart.
Our mission is to inspire and empower your journey to greater wellness, healing, and transformation through holistic courses and resources from leading experts around the world.
Inspirational thoughts for a happy and fulfilling day.
Quitting Self-Created Loneliness
End Anxiety and Panic Attacks
Re-Parent Your Inner Child
Karmic Relationships: How to Identify Them and Break Free
You Are What You Think
—
One thing I like about the site is the drop-down menu which allows you to choose the type of courses specific to your needs.
Join our community of 1.6 million subscribers and receive free daily inspirational messages.
I will certainly browse the courses available, I’ve already seen a couple that looks interesting
Melinda
Reference:
Thank you for joining me for this week’s Friday Quote.

So true!
Melinda
The Most Important “Sexy” Model Video Ever
Warrior
Repost from 2014
Ideas.Ted.Com
Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë
When I read this book for the first time as a deeply odd fifth-grader (or, as Jane says, “poor, plain, and little”), it felt like grasping onto a life raft that had been flung to me through the folds of time. Feeling such a kinship with Jane and with Charlotte Brontë herself made me feel, quite suddenly, less alone. I still re-read this book every couple of years, and it still speaks to something primal and yearning in me — the outsider woman who is finally seen, finds love, but also has the strength and self-possession to reject that love until she is able to accept it from a place of her own power and dignity. If you haven’t read it, do so immediately; if you read it a long time ago, it is well worth reading again; and if you, like me, can’t get enough of it, may I also recommend Wide Sargasso Sea, which is a prequel by Jean Rhys centered on the story of the mad wife in the attic.
— Naomi McDougall Jones (TED Talk: What it’s like to be a woman in Hollywood)
Good Woman by Lucille Clifton
I read this collection of poems at a time of life when I was extremely outwardly successful yet, as I later came to learn, mired in self-loathing. Clifton’s poems on blackness, femaleness, mothering and the body were the catalyst of my journey to self-love. Reading Clifton, I felt, “If these words are possible, if she is possible, maybe I am possible.”
— Julie Lythcott-Haims (TED Talk: How to raise successful kids — without over-parenting)
Madame Curie: A Biography by Eve Curie
The book that shaped me was a biography of Marie Curie, written by her daughter Eve Curie. I read it when I was a pre-teenager, and it motivated me to become a scientist. I was inspired by how she felt that scientific research was a deeply worthwhile, even noble, calling and that she also had a family (two daughters) and was a devoted parent as well as an iconic researcher.
— Elizabeth Blackburn (TED Talk: The science of cells that never get old)
Writings of Nichiren Daishonin by Nichiren Daishonin
Nichiren Daishonin was a Japanese philosopher (1222–82) who wrote at a time when women were dismissed and faced a life and future of woe. In this book, he encourages men and especially women to make possible the impossible. He addresses women with powerful phrases like, “Even if one were to meet a person who could cross the ocean carrying Mount Sumeru on his head, one could never find a woman like you. Even though one might find a person who could steam sand and make boiled rice of it, one could never meet a woman like you.” This kind of courage really shaped me in showing me the infinite value and dignity of life.
— Wanda Diaz-Merced (TED Talk: How a blind astronomer found a way to hear the stars)
Einstein’s Dreams by Alan Lightman
I read this book, a linked collection of short stories about dreams Einstein had, when I was a teenager, and it helped me see the world through different eyes. The scenarios that the author describes in succinct and beautiful prose are imaginary — in one, time is a circle, endlessly repeating itself — but reading them increased my awareness of how extremely narrow a framework of time and space we live in.
—Karen Lloyd (TED Talk: This deep-sea mystery is changing our understanding of life)
Any Pippi Longstocking book by Astrid Lindgren
Lately, in the context of the #metoo movement, I found myself reflecting upon the outsized influence that the children’s book character Pippi Longstocking has had on me. Growing up in the Netherlands, I was not surrounded by traditional stories created by Disney. The one character that was, was Pippi. A girl my age, Pippi was extraordinarily strong — strong enough to toss policemen off her veranda (hence my work today to hold the police around the world accountable for human-rights violations?). She was independent and lived in a big house by herself with a monkey and a horse (this was refreshingly different from dominant-gender narratives that involved futures created by princes and proposals), loyal, principled (she espoused sticking with your values over obeying rules), and anti-authority (she defied all formal structures of authority, from parents to educators — a key quality that I look for in leading a group of human-rights defenders). Last but not least, she was economically self-sufficient — she had a treasure trove of gold coins hidden in a tree trunk and taught me early on to be fiscally independent.
— Yvette Alberdingk-Thijm (TED Talk: The power of citizen video to create undeniable truths)
Blue Ocean Strategy: How to Create Uncontested Market Space and Make the Competition Irrelevant by W. Chan Kim and Renée Mauborgne
This book had an immense impact on me as I was developing the Runway of Dreams Foundation. It explores what it means to successfully create “blue oceans,” untapped market spaces ripe for growth and innovation. My middle son, Oliver, was born with a rare form of muscular dystrophy, which makes it hard for him to find fashionable and functional clothing. Through my experiences with him, I realized that millions of people around the globe were also struggling to access stylish clothing and that the fashion industry was not addressing their needs. Mainstream adaptive clothing was a wide-open “blue ocean” of opportunity, and the book gave me the tools and framework I needed to take action.
— Mindy Scheier (TED Talk: How adaptive clothing empowers people with disabilities)
Born to Run: A Hidden Tribe, Superathletes, and the Greatest Race the World Has Never Seen by Christopher McDougall
Ah, how this book has impacted me! First and foremost, it was the first non-schoolbook which I read fully from end to end. While I’ve started reading many books, I never finished any. Many people say reading is for some people, not for all, but reading this book gave me another perspective — we just need the right book for us to fall in love with reading! This book is what got me into reading, and what a blessing that has been. Second, for those who love running, who are training for their next marathon, or who feel freed when they run, this book is a gem in allowing us to connect with the belief that humans were born to run, and most important, to consider that we were born to run barefoot. This book made me appreciate living barefoot. It has made me remind myself to take off my shoes and let my feet live freely whenever I can.
— Lana Mazahreh (TED Talk: 3 thoughtful ways to conserve water)
Bridge Across My Sorrows by Christina Noble with Robert Coram
I read this memoir when I was in my 20s, and to this day it remains one of the most powerful human survival stories I have read. The author endured a harrowing childhood and adolescence in Dublin and, later, a violent marriage. As an adult, she traveled to Vietnam, where she turned her attention to helping the impoverished and vulnerable street children in Ho Chi Minh City. She went on to establish her own foundation, which now has programs in Vietnam and Mongolia. Her ability to survive and succeed has always stayed with me. I realized that self-determination and courage are innate qualities that no one can take from you and should never be underestimated. The book isn’t easy to read; I cried a lot but I could not put it down. If you like to read about strong, real women, this book is a must.
—Michelle Knox (TED Talk: Talk about your death while you’re still healthy)
Dept. of Speculation by Jenny Offill
I adored this novel from its first sentence. It is a portrait of a marriage seen through the eyes of an unnamed woman. It explores desire and its loss, the fears and hopes of birth and parenthood, and the terrors of things falling apart — all things that resonated deeply with me. I am also in awe of the apparently effortless way Offill weaves philosophy and history into her fictional narrative, rightly linking the intimate and domestic — traditionally seen as feminine spheres — to fundamental questions about the nature of knowledge and existence. This is a slender book (and as a mother of very young children, that is certainly a plus for me!), but each time I re-read it, I experience the kind of emotional connection with its protagonist that leaves me feeling listened to — which is what I value most in reading.
— Tiffany Watt Smith (TED Talk: The history of human emotions)
The God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy
Roy’s novel remains one of my favorites of all time. Her complex tale of an Indian family in Kerala unfolds masterfully through a series of flashbacks and side stories, and her writing is nothing short of stunning. It is an incredibly intricate work of fiction that touches on a myriad of sensitive themes in Indian culture and society, ranging from forbidden love to politics and the complexities of the caste system. The book came out in 1997, when I was in law school in Boston, and I was transported to another time and place while reading it. I was raised in the United States as a first-generation Indian, and this was one of the first times I read a story set in a backdrop that was culturally familiar to me, even though the story itself was completely unfamiliar. The critical and commercial global success of The God of Small Things made me realize that culturally diverse stories mattered, and it planted the seed in my mind that perhaps there was room for my story among those voices.
—Anjali Kumar (TED Talk: My failed mission to find God — and what I found instead)
The Untold Story of Milk: The History, Politics and Science of Nature’s Perfect Food: Raw Milk from Pasture-Fed Cows by Ron Schmid
This nonfiction book opened my eyes to the power that multinational corporations have over our food systems and the dangers and risks this poses to human health as well as livestock health. It puts into perspective how destructive consumerism is, and it made me question the power of marketing. It will make you think about the future of all food through a milky lens.
— Su Kahumbu (TED Talk: How we can help hungry kids, one text at a time)
Just Kids by Patti Smith
Just Kids reads like a poem, as Smith’s wordcraft transports you to the bohemian New York of the late 1960s and ’70s. While her memoir recounts the relationship she nurtured with her lover and friend, photographer Robert Mapplethorpe, what resonated with me was the way it depicts the insatiable drive that the two artists had to express and refine their art and creations. I was struck by their commitment to and faith in their inner artistic voice, a message that inspired me to be more creatively courageous, both in my scientific work and in my personal life.
— Miho Janvier (TED Talk: Lessons from a solar storm chaser)
Pussy: A Reclamation by Regena Thomashauer
This manifesto is as close to a come-to-Jesus moment as I’ll ever get. Thomashauer, who goes by the name Mama Gena (think: sexy, hilarious, take-no-prisoners, feminist, Jewish mother — the one who all your friends want to hang out with), has been working with women for 20 years to flip the script on our patriarchal culture. As women, we’ve ingested so much about sacrifice, suffering, working harder, working smarter, enduring, and sucking it up. She’s teaching us to stand for our pleasure and to stand for one another. Here’s what she says: when a woman is in her full pleasure, or — in Pussy parlance — “turned on,” everyone is taken care of. The first thing a turned-on woman does is turn to her sisters to bring them higher; her bright light illuminates her family and her community. She brings pleasure to her own life and to the world around her. Who doesn’t want that?
— Sue Jaye Johnson (TED Talk: What we don’t teach kids about sex)
The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien
My family immigrated to America when I was 11, and this book was the first real literature that I read after I learned English. It helped me understand that life is meant to have a villain or two, that failure often leads to the climax, and that people, like characters, develop, so even the most unlikely hero can save the day. And even though every great story must come to an end, there’s always a sequel — all you have to do is to get out of your Hobbit hole and embrace your curiosity to go on an adventure.
— Fawn Qiu (TED Talk: Easy DIY projects for kid engineers)
In Search of Our Mothers’ Gardens: Womanist Prose by Alice Walker
In her 1974 essay, “In Search of Our Mothers’ Gardens, The Creativity of Black Women in the South,” which is part of this collection, Walker challenges us to imagine the experiences of our creative female ancestors and calls upon Black women to define their own identity as Black women artists throughout history: “How was the creativity of the Black woman kept alive, year after year and century after century, when for most of the years Black people have been in America, it was a punishable crime for a Black person to read or write? And the freedom to paint, to sculpt, to expand the mind with action did not exist. Consider, if you can bear to imagine it, what might have been the result if singing, too, had been forbidden by law.” When I first read these words, I wanted to explore the possibilities of these experiences and reinvest in the work of other Black female artists as a way of locating my own identity as an artist. Ever since I was a child, art has played a large part in my life. I am fascinated by the work of 19th-century artists and equally intrigued by the photographic images in my family album of the women that came before me.
—Deborah Willis (TED Talk, given with her son Hank Willis Thomas: A mother and son united by love and art)
Being with Dying: Cultivating Compassion and Fearlessness in the Presence of Death by Joan Halifax
It was important to me that I give my mother the best possible experience in the very difficult and precious time when she was dying. But I had no idea how; I had no experience. I researched this topic as much as I researched cancer itself and how to fight it, and this book was the most helpful I read. Halifax is truly a gift to our world. She is the ultimate role model of how to be with someone who is going through the dying process. In understanding how to be present to the letting go of life, we can learn how to live more presently.
— Alyssa Monks (TED Talk: How loss helped one artist find beauty in imperfection)
Mothers and Others by Sarah Blaffer Hrdy
This nonfiction book is an eye-opening exploration into how children are raised around the world and how child-rearing can inform the understanding of human nature more broadly. I relied heavily on it when writing my own book,which explores the brain mechanisms that enable us to care about other people’s welfare. As it turns out, the same brain networks that support caring for children also support care more broadly, an idea that builds on the author’s most essential point: one of the things which makes humans special as a species is that we don’t limit care to our own children. We can expand our circles of care and compassion outward to encompass nearly anyone, and it’s all because of the way our brains were set up to parent.
— Abigail Marsh (TED Talk: Why some people are more altruistic than others)
Anne of Green Gables by L.M. Montgomery
Just a few pages into this book, I realized Anne Shirley was a kindred spirit. An orphaned girl with no material advantages but a richness of soul, imagination and ambition, Anne was wonderfully imperfect and extraordinarily real. I met her in sixth grade: She taught me that different doesn’t mean bad, smart beats pretty, and tomorrow is always fresh, with no mistakes in it — yet. Her courage to try and her willingness to hope inspired some of my own leaps and softened the thuds too. When you’ve got a friend who doesn’t just see a lake but the Lake of Shining Waters, you can find the silver lining in just about anything.
— Kate Adams (TED Talk: 4 larger-than-life lessons from soap operas)
Wide Sargasso Sea by Jean Rhys
This great feminist novel, which is set in the Caribbean, blew me away at 18. Hypnotic and mesmerizing and sensuous, with the weight of the tropics, sin and loneliness, it was exhilarating because of the author’s psychological bravery and insight. I hope people are still reading her — she changed the lives of all the young women I knew.
— Anne Lamott (TED Talk: 12 truths I learned from life and writing)
The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying by Sogyal Rinpoche
This seminal work changed my life in more ways than one. It distills ancient and profound Tibetan wisdom in a manner that is comprehensible to the Western mind. The two parts of the book — Life and Death — are naturally related to each other. While I am not an assiduous meditator, some of the advice and techniques explained in the Life section have stayed with me after just one reading. I learned how to calm the mind, even in situations that would otherwise cause a panic attack. But I found the section on dying even more powerful and useful. In Western societies we fear death and don’t talk about it much. Here, we learn how to prepare for our own end and how to help others transition. This was of immense value at a time when so many young people, friends and contemporaries were decimated by AIDS in the 1990s. Later on, as I grew older, so did my aunts, uncles and father. Facing up to their departures in ways practiced by advanced spiritual leaders takes away some of the pain, fear and sadness — theirs and ours. Unreligious and truly transformational, this book continues to inspire and provide endless wisdom on the great mysteries and challenges of our human existence.
— Philippa Neave (TED Talk: The unexpected challenges of a country’s first election)
Salt by Nayyirah Waheed
For the past couple of years, I’ve had this collection of poems at my bedside. It’s brutal and love-filled at the same time, and I always find something that speaks to what I am feeling at the moment. Today, it’s this one …
knowing your power
is what creates
Humility.
not knowing your power
is what creates
Insecurity.
—ego
— Sayu Bhojwani (TED Talk: Immigrant voices make democracy stronger)
Sexing the Cherry by Jeanette Winterson
This novel really influenced my thinking. The writing is so visual — gritty and sublime at the same time. It allows you to engage with vastness and wonder and the itchy curious experience of having your feet in mud. I also like the back story of the author, Jeanette Winterson. She is a difficult character to peg, one who is courageous, compassionate, intelligent, violent, proud, and argumentative, a fighter with a flair for love stories. She has definitely influenced my connection with multifaceted ideas of “female,” “queer” and “independent.”
— Emily Parsons-Lord (TED Talk: Art made of the air we breathe)
Next week I’m having Carpal Tunnel surgery on my left and at the same time he is removing the brace in my wrist from when I broke it in 2018. This will be the worst of the surgeries. I go back at the end of the month for Carpal Tunnel surgery in my right hand but that is a much easier surgery with a quick recovery. What makes it more frustrating is I have Ostearithrois of the carpometacarpal joint in both thumbs. This means, the cartilage in those joints has disintegrated and is bone on bone, and it’s quite painful.
My left hand will be bandaged for two weeks, and for several weeks after I can’t do any heavy lifting. I’m already practicing how to dress with my fingers only, boy that’s hard. You use your thumbs for so many things.
Luckily I have my husband to help me but he will be back at work so I’ll have to learn to do things for myself. I expect the first week to involve many pain meds and sleeping. After that, I’ll try my hand at writing to see if I can do it without hurting my wrist and thumb.
I will still read your post although I might not be able to comment.
I will miss your friendship and our conversations.
Melinda
by Elizabeth Drucker
Medically Reviewed by: Debra Rose Wilson, Ph.D., MSN, R.N., IBCLC, AHN-BC, CHT
When I was 14 years old, sobbing uncontrollably in classes and during cheerleading practice, a psychiatrist scribbled out a prescription for Prozac. I paced through the aisles of the pharmacy, flipping through copies of Vogue and smelling the bottles of shampoo while I waited for the pharmacist to spill the capsules into a bottle.
I knew something was “wrong” with me, but I wasn’t convinced swallowing these pills could make me feel better. I did know I was sad — so sad that it was agonizing to tumble out of my bed and make my way to the bus stop.
Throughout high school, I cycled through the offices of many different psychiatrists. I was always looking for the next pill that could fix whatever was wrong with me.
After I got over the initial shock of needing to rely on psychiatric medications, I started to see these pills as hopeful objects that would bring me some relief.
Each new psychiatrist and each new medication change brought new hope that I would get better. The doctors were encouraged that we would find the right medication and that my life would become more manageable.
Then, during my senior year of high school, I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. And with that came lithium, pills that are amazing at evening out my moods. So, now I live the lithium lifestyle.
I have to remain vigilant about what my body is telling me because if the level of lithium in my blood gets high enough, I could get very sick. I’ve spent nights sleeping in emergency room beds because the lithium level became toxic and I needed fluids to rehydrate me.
Even still, there’s no denying that this medication has saved my life.
It’s rescued me from some of the deepest, darkest depressions — those times when I felt so broken and raw that I was not sure if I could go on. Lithium has sucked the depression out of my marrow and allowed me to have more of a life.
It’s clear that I need these chemicals to function. And I have a feeling that I will be taking lithium for a very long time, maybe even for the rest of my life.
But I can handle that. I am just grateful that lithium exists, that I can swallow a few capsules and be back on track to regaining myself.
However, despite its success, there are some nights when I’m so tired that I’m tempted to go to bed without taking my pills. I don’t want to be reminded that I’m sick and that I’m different from all of my friends. I doubt they’re reliant on pills just to survive.
But then, I see flashbacks: me pacing through the corridors of the psych ward; me standing at the medication counter while nurses pour tablets and capsules into little cups; me rocking back and forth on my bed, hoping that I can somehow get some relief from my depression.
So I stumble to the bathroom sink, fill up a large glass of water, and then bring it to my bed. I spill my cocktail of tablets and capsules onto my comforter and start taking them.
I remind myself that these pills are a collection of chemicals that allow me to function, to get through the day without being interrupted by the manic or depressive symptoms of my bipolar disorder.
Taking pills has become a part of every day. And, for me, every day begins and ends the same way: with me taking the pills my psychiatrist has prescribed to keep my bipolar illness at bay.
I think you know by now that, for me, taking my pills is not optional. The consequences are very real and very scary.
My medication keeps the depression at bay. It keeps me on the other side of that locked psych ward door, a place I don’t want to be. My medication allows me to live just like those who don’t need medication — so I can go to college and even get through grad school.
Even though I know all of this, it doesn’t mean I’m thrilled that I’ll be relying on psychiatric medication for the rest of my life. Of course, I worry about the long-term consequences on my body.
For example, I know that lithium can be hard on the kidneys. The medication that does so much for my emotional state can also make me nauseous with trembling hands. And it’s very embarrassing when I’m at a restaurant with friends and my hands tremble every time I reach over to put some food on my plate.
Someone very close to me passed away because he refused to be treated for his own mood disorder. I think of him when I’m reluctant to take my pills.
I know this person in my life didn’t want to take psychiatric medication because of the stigma of mental illness. I feel it myself when I go to the pharmacy to pick up my lithium. I still whisper the names of the medications I’m picking up so nobody will think I’m “crazy.”
Psychiatric medications are effective. I don’t care if I have to experience side effects because anything is better than depression to me. My pills have given me my life back.
I can’t say it’s easy to manage those side effects when they have me sitting in the emergency room getting fluids, but I don’t want to spend my days in bed, crying and isolated.
Depression is one of the most painful things I’ve ever gone through and I’m so grateful my medications exist to bring me back to the real world. I will keep taking them because I want to feel better, and this is how I can.
The article looks at a person’s life and how they manage their illness and medication. I can say without a doubt, that taking your medication as prescribed is the best way to manage your illness.
Melinda
Reference:
Ilze and I have become fast friends. We share many of the same interests and she’s also very wise. Her posts always entertain or teach me something new. Please overlook the mistake I made when I said “Most of my post…..” I don’t write for sympathy. Thank you Ilze for digging deep and sharing with the community.
#5: From Followers to Friends – Melinda from lookingforthelight.blog

I’m so happy to have Melinda from Looking for the Light as a wonderful supporter in the blogging community. Although we haven’t known each other for long, her kindness, warmth, and genuine encouragement always shine through in her thoughtful comments. If you haven’t already, I highly recommend visiting her blog, where she shares beautiful insights … Continue
Melinda
Thank you for joining me for this week’s Friday Quote.

Melinda
His voice reaches deep into my soul and keeps my attention. He is smooth, strong, and hits the perfect high notes. Another classic for generations to come.
It’s the weekend!!!!!!
I’m glad you joined me for another edition of Weekend Music Share this week.
Have a great weekend!
Melinda
Welcome back to Weekend Music Share, the place where everyone can share their favorite music.
Feel free to use the Weekend Music Share banner in your post, and use the hashtag #WeekendMusicShare on social media so other participants can find your post.
There are soldiers from other countries fighting side by side with the Ukrainians and I want to say how much I appreciate your sacrifice. Many of you are fighting far away from your families and you yearn to see them. You are fighting for the freedom of the Ukrainian people and I can’t thank you enough for having the conviction of the heart. No doubt, you’ve made lifelong friends in the worst of situations, but the end will come and we can all celebrate.
I want to give a huge shout-out to the Americans who are helping support Ukraine, have a piece of pecan pie on me. You need to know you are not forgotten back home this Thanksgiving Day in fact I bet your families are praying for you and counting the days to see you.
Be safe and remember you’re in our hearts.
The Ukrainian flag colors.
Melinda
Just a few tips I’ve learned that work for me, I hope one of them helps you.
You can buy 4×4 inch sheer bags with ties and make shoe refreshers and refresh the clothes in the drawers. You can a 1 pound bag of loose fragrant lavender and make your own. I bought a pound in a glass container with a pop off top which was only $2 more and I can use the canister later. Well worth the $2.
If you wash your clothes on delicate unless it’s a large load, your clothes will last longer.
If you use a detergent for delicates, it’s often easier on sensitive skin.
I often wear sweater pants and the waist is often not dry with the rest of the load. I bought these wool dryer balls which cut down on drying time, clothes have fewer wrinkles and soften your clothes. NOT! The waist of my sweater pants were still moist, I could not tell the difference in wrinkles and my clothes came out with a ton of lent. I will have to use a lent brush to wear them.
If you add too much ice to your glass or have big lumps in your ice maker, save them for water to use later. I save the water for my plants. I collect the water in a large bowl if needed or add it to my watering bucket. This morning, I made tea and had leftover water, which I saved as well.
To have nice, even-growing plants, you need to turn them in another direction every week to get the extra sun.
I hope one of these tips is helpful.
Can you share a tip with me?
Melinda
Thanksgiving at its core, is a celebration of the Pilgrims’ first harvest. The day was filled with joy for the achievements in the field and the opportunity to share a meal with others including Native Americans.
I’m having a commercially made Thanksgiving dinner for which the sweat equity is picking it up but there is so much to be grateful for. Regardless of the setbacks and we all have them, I’m thankful for each day I wake up with my husband and dogs surrounding me.
Many of you are traveling for the holiday, and the weather is atrocious on both coasts. Take your time and plan for delays, even cancellations. The holidays are a great time to see family, but the weather can play center stage. Be safe.
I’m also thankful for you, the conversations, and laughs we’ve had are priceless.
Melinda
I’m glad you joined me on Wordless Wednesday and I hope to see you soon.
I’m hanging the wreath on my office door, it cheers me up.
Melinda
Click on the link at the bottom of the post to see the entire list for December.
HIV/AIDS Awareness Month
National Drunk & Drugged Driving (3D) Prevention Month
National Human Rights Month
Safe Toys and Gifts Month
Seasonal Affective Disorder Awareness Month
Universal Human Rights Month
World Twin To Twin Transfusion Syndrome Awareness Month
Worldwide Food Service Safety Month
Rosa Parks Bus Seat Refusal Anniversary – December 1
World AIDS Day – December 1
Giving Tuesday – 1st Tuesday after Thanksgiving
International Day of Persons with Disabilities – December 3
International Volunteer Day – December 5
Human Rights Day – December 10
International Animal Rights Day – December 10
Bill of Rights Day – December 15
One important awareness day for me is Giving Tuesday when many charities have donors who will double or triple your donation. I make all of my yearly donations on that day to help the money stretch further.
Melinda
Reference:
https://www.goodgoodgood.co/articles/december-awareness-days-months