Category: Men & Womens Health

World Mental Health Awareness Day 10th
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

World Mental Health Awareness Day 10th

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Every day is an Awareness Day for me because I have to focus on my Mental Health before I feel overloaded and stressed out.

When discussing Mental Health and self-care it could be as simple as reducing stress, getting regular sleep, and putting the electronics away an hour before bedtime. It works for me, or take a nice bath with essential oils to create a nice aroma. There are so many ways we can keep our Mental Health in check. One of the most important tasks every day is to take your medication as prescribed.

 

Self Care Tips

When life gets busy it’s easy to forget to take care of yourself. But practicing self-care can have great benefits for your mental health.

Don’t feel guilty about taking time to care for yourself. It’s not selfish to make your health a priority. You will be better able to help others when you are your healthiest.

How to practice self-care is different for each person and can be different from day to day.  An act of self-care for one person could actually be triggering for someone else, such as visiting with family. The important part is to find a balance of activities that work for you.

Here are some ideas on ways to get started, and don’t forget that you can also combine these activities. For example, eating your favorite dessert at the park or going to the beach and reading with a friend.

Build a Healthy Foundation

Get enough sleep and do your best to keep a consistent sleep schedule

Eat a balanced diet and include fruits and vegetables

Remember to drink enough water

Avoid triggers

Take breaks from your computer, phone, or social media

Learn to say no: it’s okay to say no if you don’t want or aren’t able to do something at the moment. Taking on too many commitments can put extra pressure on yourself and cause more stress.

Many people think they don’t have time for self-care, especially men. Your body gives you what you put into taking care of. Men tend to be the worst at self-care or even the idea. Taking a break to get fresh air for 10 minutes is self-care. Your body will give you back what you put into taking care of yourself.

Melinda

References:

https://www.whitehouse.gov/briefing-room/presidential-actions/2023/04/28/a-proclamation-on-national-mental-health-awareness-month-2023/

https://ibpf.org/articles/50-ways-to-start-practicing-self-care/

Blogger Highlight-Mental Health Struggles
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Blogger Highlight-Mental Health Struggles

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Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week we highlight the blog of Mental Health Struggles.

Mental Health Struggles

Hello! I am a 33-year-old woman speaking out about mental health & daily struggles to help me process things a little better.

I love how frank she is, so refreshing. Be sure to stop by. 

Melinda

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The Astonishing Mental Health Benefits Of Gardening
Celebrate Life · Fun · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

The Astonishing Mental Health Benefits Of Gardening

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Have you ever noticed that some of the happiest people you know are massively into gardening? The reasons for this are simple: gardening is one of the best things you can do to boost your mental health. 

But why is this? Why do people who spend time in their gardens seem to have healthier inner lives than everyone else? It is a little mysterious. 

The reason, it seems, comes down to the ways that our bodies react when we’re working outdoors. Naturally, we’re inclined to spend time in the sunlight, observing the world around us, and trying to get to grips with it. It’s not just about the physical activity of gardening and so-called feel-good hormones. There’s also a sense that you’re really profoundly connecting with nature. It feels very different from spending an evening in front of Netflix. 

So what benefits do people who garden regularly report? Check them out below. 

Photo by Rebecca Swafford on Pexels.com

A Sense Of Accomplishment

Having a sense of accomplishment and control over your environment is an addictive feeling. The more you experience it, the more you want it.

Gardens are chaotic systems. Over time, they devolve into an all-against-all survival of the fittest. And it can be a challenge to bring them under control. That, however, is part of the joy of the process. It’s nice to feel like you can tame nature – at least on a small patch of land – and get some genuine satisfaction from the process. 

An Increase In Creativity

Pexels – CC0 License

We don’t tend to think of being creative as a health benefit, but it is a vital sign that we are in a good place. Creativity is a mental state that recruits practically every area of the brain. But it can only happen if we are in a positive frame of mind. If you’re using mental resources worrying about something, it’s hard to develop new ideas. Gardening helps to direct your focus on the outside world instead of your internal thoughts, allowing you room for creativity where you would have struggled before. 

Improved Mood

Would you like to improve your mood? Well, according to data collected by Plant Life Balance, gardening can help. According to their research, around 58 percent of people experience improvements in how they feel when they spend time in the garden. 

Feeling More Connected To Others

We typically see gardening as an individual pursuit. Interestingly, a large segment of people who do it feel more connected to the broader community. Part of this has to do with the fact that some gardening tasks are communal. For example, Lineage Tree Care points out that gardening involves tree trimming and storm clean-up that affect the whole community. If you visit their website, you can see examples of what they mean. Things like overhanging trees can affect both the property owner and their neighbors. 

Feeling More Connected To Nature

Finally, a large number of people say that gardening makes them feel more connected to nature – something that tends to enhance overall well-being considerably.

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

Let’s Celebrate Columbus Day 10th
Celebrate Life · Men & Womens Health

Let’s Celebrate Columbus Day 10th

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It’s hard to imagine what life was like for those who had to take dangerous ship rides and find shelter and a place to grow food. They had little to work with and in reality, paved the way for America’s growth.

The first Columbus Day celebration took place in 1792 when New York’s Columbian Order—better known as Tammany Hall—held an event to commemorate the historic landing’s 300th anniversary. Taking pride in Columbus’ birthplace and faith, Italian and Catholic communities in various parts of the country began organizing annual religious ceremonies and parades in his honor.

In 1892, President Benjamin Harrison issued a proclamation encouraging Americans to mark the 400th anniversary of Columbus’ voyage with patriotic festivities, writing, “On that day let the people, so far as possible, cease from toil and devote themselves to such exercises as may best express honor to the discoverer and their appreciation of the great achievements of the four completed centuries of American life.”

We owe our lives to the settlers because of Christopher Columbus.

Melinda

References:

https://www.history.com/topics/holidays/columbus-day

Caregiver Conversations With My Gramps
Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Caregiver Conversations With My Gramps

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There are more caregivers than any of us know, and as the population grows older more caregivers are needed. This post is a compilation of conversations with my gramps before he died. I think it will give you a better idea of the day-to-day needs.

He was told by his Nephrologist to not drive and to get his keys if he could. Not going to happen.

He thought he could replace the glass on the door to the backyard. He thought he had a great job. I stop by late at night and glass was everywhere in the garage.

He had me cancel a doctor’s appointment so he could go to Center Center.

He wanted to talk with hospice himself, no way. There’s no idea what he would say and it would not be reality.

I arrived to find dirty underpants, several with poo, and there were more in the bathtub.

I heard him on the phone asking someone if he thought we were telling the truth.

We were told he had 2-3 weeks to live, they forgot to say old people die faster. We. had a week.

He would not acknowledge he had Chronic Kidney Diseases until the end and refused to get in

One morning he yelled out what did I go to his Cheerios, what are you talking about? I didn’t buy the right flavor.

As the days went by I asked him if he wanted to call his family and friends. He looked so sad. I sit by him while he calls the phone book. Then the house was full of family and friends. I had to set hours for visitation and no smoking. Many of our hillbilly family members showed up and said they would come back and bring a card table to play dominos. I got flaked but I set the rules.

My grandparents were from poverty and WWI, and Gramps continued to live like he had no money. One day I woke up and there are tiny pieces of toilet paper with poop on them.

He never told me he was constipated, he pushed too hard and got a hernia.

Melinda

From Alcoholic To Freedom
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward · Survivor

From Alcoholic To Freedom

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I’m a recovering Alcoholic and stopped drinking about 15 years ago. Everyone is different in their recovery. I went cold turkey because of my Mental Illness. My Psychiatrist at the time knew I drank, and we talked about it. During a very difficult time, I asked my doctor if stopping drinking would help my meds, and he said yes. I need to have all of my medications to work as well as possible.

I started drinking at 9 years old, lived in domestic abuse, and child abuse and my step-father was a mean drunk. He beat my mother often and she would in turn beat me.

My father was also an alcoholic so my growing up was chaotic.

Alcohol made me act differently, especially at events for work. All memories are in the past and rarely think of the spectacle I made.

Today is the perfect day to stop drinking or at least go to one AA meeting to see if they can give you support. I hear great things about AA making people whole.

Melinda

What Would You Say To A Special Person If You Could Go Back In Time
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

What Would You Say To A Special Person If You Could Go Back In Time

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I thought about my grandparents the other day and thought of all the questions I would ask if I had a chance.

I was like a child to my grandparents due to traumatic experiences. I was 14 years old when I went to live with them permanently.

This photo is of granny, step-brother Ricki, and me, dig that shirt!

My granny looked from afar when I was very young, looking for abuse. My granny knew child abuse was happening but could not a finger on anything. She probably saved my life at six months old. My mother left me in the tub full of water and went downstairs to talk with my granny, after a few minutes of talking my granny asked where I was. Oh, she is upstairs in the bathroom.

I would ask my granny how being legally blind has affected her life.

Was it frustrating always to have to have someone take you?

I would ask about how she survived the war while raising a child by herself.

My grandparents were so good to me and my friends at boarding school. Every Wednesday was parents group. They were there every week for the full years I was there. She even sent brownies to our dorm or loads of candy, everyone in my hall looked forward to Wednesday nights.

My granny was the strongest person I know, she could do anything except prevent her death.

Melinda

Ronald Reagan Was The Leader Of Bipartisanship
Celebrate Life · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Ronald Reagan Was The Leader Of Bipartisanship

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I’ve been a lifelong Republican and even voted for Trump, the biggest mistake in my life. I became a Democrat until the radicals and militia along with Trump’s help stormed the Capital. He does not believe in rules, he does whatever he wants. Quite he is frankly using the Indictments as if they are little trophies. 

He is also for the HATRED, lowering standards for Presidents and Congress and most of all Trump has decided the country is his little board game that he moves people around in. 

What is Trump saying at Rallies? Does he ever talk about concrete ways he will make America a better place. Most often, no words about what he’ll do are spoken, if the Press asks him a question all he can muster is “Making America Better” Now that he’s been indicted of so many crimes and criminal activities at Trump Tower.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

When it comes to politics, I vote, watch to see who wins, and then only what I see on the news. I can’t begin to fathom another four years with the delusional, fake, blame others when he knows it’s not true.

Republican Voters please open your mind and forget politics, write a list of what you expect from a President and Congress. Politics is not a circus, Congress has the same qualifications and disqualified offenses. 

What did Trump do for you and how did your life get better after he was voted in.

This post is not Republican or Democrat, this post is looking back on President before Trump and his filthy name-calling and lies. Not to mention By Constitutions #3 and #14, I doubt Congress has read the document or they chose to ignore the rules because of the Republican Party thinks they own the world and deliver nothing but a Circus.

Mr. Reagan had a common-sense conviction that helped his achievements. Sometimes he failed to get what he wanted. Instead of pointing fingers, blaming the other party, or spouting partisan points, President Reagan deftly used his failures to do better. His failures seemed to make him sharper.

Above all, he was a true gentleman of American politics. You would not have seen him giving a speech like many do today – calling his opponents names or giving out generalized insults. Dignity and wit were his weapons of choice.

Former staffers say that his phone logs would show a surprising amount of communication with members of Congress – of both parties. Whether it was at home or abroad, he believed in communication and the credibility of his word.

Good negotiators are careful with their credibility. President Reagan was such a person. When he gave his word, it was a solid promise. I believe that is something we should be mindful of today.

My last words are Ronald Regan was known for his ability to work both sides, there aren’t Republication Kevin McCarthy is a great example. McCarthy worked with the Democrats to get the spending bill. Matz Geotize? is challenging McCarthy because he worked with Democrats.

That is their damn job!

Melinda

 

Blogger Highlight-Jennifer Pentland
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Blogger Highlight-Jennifer Pentland

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Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week we highlight the blog of Jennifer Pentland.

Jennifer Pentland

 

Welcome to my creative space!

My name is Jennifer Pentland, and I’m a self-taught artist who found solace and passion in art after experiencing the loss of a loved one. Through art therapy, I discovered an incredible love for the world of creativity.

Art has become my faithful companion on this journey of healing and self-discovery. It has provided me with a means to confront and navigate the depths of my anxiety, offering a sanctuary where my emotions can find expression and release without judgment or restraint. In the process, I have learned that art has an incredible power to heal and transform, both for the artist and those who connect with the artwork.

You will come back to her site because it’s addicting.

Melinda

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Why Adventure is an Essential Tool on the Path to Mental Wellness
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Why Adventure is an Essential Tool on the Path to Mental Wellness

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If there is one thing about our lives, it’s that if we are experiencing one of the many aspects of the mental health umbrella, it’s that it forces us to retreat into our shell. Mental wellness is not something that is defined as the absence of mental illness but about learning to thrive in a mind state where you can realize your potential, cope with those everyday stresses, and make those meaningful contributions. This is why something like adventuring may seem completely anathema to the idea of self-care. But here are some. Adventure can be an amazing catalyst to improve our wellness. Let’s show you why.

Photo by Jahoo Clouseau on Pexels.com

Connection with Nature

While so many people instantly connect the idea of mental wellness with being out in nature, not everybody experiences that stereotypical sense of calm that is out in nature. However, if you attempt to get yourself off the beaten track and make the most of your time in nature, it instantly gives you a sense of grounding and a soothing effect that could be very therapeutic. 

Because being in nature can improve our mental well-being, we can stand to benefit not just from being surrounded by trees but actually using these approaches as a way to get as far away from the rat race as humanly possible. We can all struggle to deal with those daily pressures. This is why potentially opting for more hiking and biking can make a big difference. You can easily purchase an electric off road bike for adults or a backpack and a new pair of boots and venture into nature.

The Attention It Demands of You

This is a very important thing to remember, especially when we are consumed by anxiety. We hear so much about the benefits of mindfulness, but rather than something like a body scan meditation or sitting there trying to think of nothing, lots of people make the mistake of thinking that mindfulness is supposed to be a welcome distraction. It should be something that nourishes you, and often when we’re feeling like there is nothing to live for, no matter what we have in our lives, doing something that simultaneously nourishes us but also is challenging enough to take our attention off our thoughts for even a split second is an amazing solution. 

Something like scuba diving or rock climbing requires you to be present in the moment because it demands so much of your attention. But you can apply this to other parts of your life as well. For example, going to the gym can be as much of an adventure as doing something as stereotypical as climbing trees or flying. When we feel anxious, we ruminate. There is a reason why those adventurers feel addicted to those practices, and that’s because they’re not consumed by those thoughts that everybody has at one point or another.

Social Connection

Finding someone who is doing exactly the same thing as you, especially when it’s a very unique or left-field practice, could foster a sense of belonging. This is absolutely ideal for mental wellness. As people, it’s deeply ingrained in us that we practice socializing. Being a part of a group of people allows us to be simultaneously involved but also blend into something, and when we participate in an activity where there are only a few people, this instantly creates a sense of trust because you’re both on the same page with the same shared goal. 

This doesn’t just mean that you then achieve the goal itself, but because you’re doing something that actively nourishes you in a group of people who are thinking the same way, you instantly feel part of a team, part of a greater purpose, and this means that you will begin to feel more inclined to pursue the things that make you feel this way. It’s like an addiction but with a more positive spin.

Increased Resilience

Going on any form of adventure is, first and foremost, about taking you out of your comfort zone. We all need to push our upper limits so we are better equipped to handle the ups and downs that life throws at us. 

We can feel so much guilt that we’re alive if we’ve gone through an incredibly tough time, but we also need to remember that life is not purely about happiness, which is a major misconception, it’s about remembering those challenges can boost our resilience and remember that adversity is something that we all overcome in any different form.

If there’s one thing about life that we should all maintain, it’s a sense of curiosity. This is why going on any form of adventure is an amazing solution, not just for the sake of mental wellness, but for every aspect of our existence.

This is a collaborative post

Melinda

 

 

What’s Your Mood Today?
Celebrate Life · Fun · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

What’s Your Mood Today?

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Photo by Tirachard Kumtanom on Pexels.com

 I’m grateful for the years and places I’ve been diving.

What about you?

Melinda

Has Your Shower Curtin Ever Given You A Concussion?
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Survivor

Has Your Shower Curtin Ever Given You A Concussion?

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It happened roughly 2 weeks ago. Please note that I have several chronic illnesses and balance issues. Taking a shower is always a risk. I’m careful and stopped using my chair last year. Big mistake! I do have a safety handle on the tub and it hurt so bad falling on top of it.

While grabbing for the shampoo the shower rod fell and hit me in the back of my head and threw me on top of the safety handle then pushed and pinned me in the corner with the water still running.

Photo by Emre Can Acer on Pexels.com

I managed to get the rod off of me and tried to get up. It took many tries to pull myself out of the tub. I didn’t have the strength to push and pull myself out of the bathtub. I was in the bathroom upstairs and he was downstairs in his office. I yelled for my husband several times but he could not hear me.

The back of my head was hit hard and now I have a concussion. My jaw hurts, my neck hurts, my ears clogged up, and have some of the biggest bruises I’ve seen. I have had several concussions over the years, like when I fell down the stairs and broke my wrist.

I’m at the point where there’s nothing to do but wait, someone mentioned 3-4 months to heal. That is news to me. I can’t image living this way for 3-4 months.

I’ve since purchased a full-size tub mat and a suction safety bar. I’m still nervous but you have to go forward. The reason I decided to get a suction cup bar vs. a permanent one is that we are moving soon and the new owners may not want it and taking it off the wall will leave a hole in the tiles

I’m looking for a portable alert that is really loud, might try my clip-on alarm for cycling. I may get several and hang in a few places because you never know where you’re going to land.

Be safe! :)

Melinda

Just Pondering
Celebrate Life · Fun · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Just Pondering

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Though you may not be in school anyone, it’s still fun to learn about new topics.

What is something unique you’re fascinated by and would you would love to learn more about?

Don’t forget to check out free college courses.

 Melinda

Reference:

Field Guide by Stampington

My No Diet Weight Loss Journey To Losing 40 Pounds
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

My No Diet Weight Loss Journey To Losing 40 Pounds

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I’m not selling anything, just sharing my journey.  There are so many DIET plans on the Internet, choose wisely. Losing weight is a long-term commitment with ups and downs.

I started my journey after being weighed at a doctor’s office. WOW, what a shock! I have lost 40 pounds in the last 14 months.

At first, I did not count calories and focused on reducing my eating. Now I’m down to one piece of pizza, unlike the three pieces in the past. I eat almost everything he eats in much smaller pieces. I have a calorie amount in my head and work with that number but I’m not too strict on myself. I eat 2-4 pieces of small caramel chocolate squares, 2 squares if I’m on the top limit of calories, and 4 if I am under the calories for the day. I love sweets so much that I allow myself a cookie or cupcake a month.

Photo by Delphine Hourlay on Pexels.com

Due to the calories, I found some rootbeer and sparkling flavored water, drinking a rootbeer once or twice a week. Everything else has very few calories. I drink lots of water right before eating and you will eat less. I drink 60-70 oz of water a day.

My weight stalled at 20 lbs and it felt like forever but the weight started to go lower and I’ve settled with 40 lbs. lost. I’m happy where I am, now it’s buying new clothes to fit.

My weight loss is not based on eating healthy, no salads, carrots, or any other item that will feel like a diet. I do eat a salad sometimes, and eat a piece of salmon each week, and eat yogurt several times each week.

I weighed myself every day, now mostly at the doctor’s office. Don’t worry about gaining 3-5 pounds as long as your weight goes back down. If not check the calories of what you’re eating. Remember pizza and other items are full of salt and will add water weight.

My concussion is better but still has a hold on me and my brain fog. I hope the post flows correctly and makes sense. :)

Melinda

Blogger Highlight-Run Away Widow
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Blogger Highlight-Run Away Widow

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Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week we highlight the blog of Run Away Widow.

Join me, Kristin, on my journey to adjust to the sudden death of my husband and learn to live as a young, middle-aged, remarried widow.

Mike was killed in August 2015. After the police investigation fades, details of the ‘accident’ become suspicious. When the medical examiner determines the cause of death is HOMICIDE, I hire a team of investigators and lawyers to discover what really happened that night.

I started writing my blog during the summer when I ran away to avoid my first wedding anniversary without my husband as well as the one year anniversary of his passing.  I fled around the world to Thailand.  

Her site is a joy to read.

Melinda

Looking for the Light

 

Once Upon a Relapse By Guest Blogger Hope Whispers
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Once Upon a Relapse By Guest Blogger Hope Whispers

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She shares an important story about her addiction and recovery, it’s a powerful post. Read for yourself, friends, and children, the time may come when you can use some of her techniques. 
 
https://hopewhisperstoday.wordpress.com/2023/09/24/once-upon-a-relapse/
Photo by Bich Tran on Pexels.com
How Parents Can Help Their Teens Overcome Depression
Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward

How Parents Can Help Their Teens Overcome Depression

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Children are heavily influenced by their surroundings. When we lavish them with positivity, they often grow up with a positive mindset and a can-do attitude. However, if we subject them to certain difficulties, they can be a lot more hardened as they approach their teenage years. The trials and challenges children face during their teenage years can often define who they are once they bloom into young adults.

While our formative years are usually between the ages of 0 and 8, children start to develop complex emotions and feelings when they begin entering high school. This is made even more difficult for certain children when they’re exposed to the internet and vastly different opinions and takes on life. When your child mingles with different cultures and personalities in school, it can trigger a lot of realizations and changes that ultimately change the way they think.

As such, a common occurrence in young teenagers is depression. This isn’t just a feeling of sadness that occurs now and then, but a recurring emotion that can make them feel hopeless and helpless. To help your child break out of these feelings, it’s essential to take a delicate approach so you don’t agitate them further.

Source: https://unsplash.com/photos/qYanN54gIrI (CC0)

Understanding the signs and symptoms of teenage depression

It’s hard to explain what depression feels like as it differs from person to person. However, there are a couple of common signs that you should look out for:

  • Unable to enjoy things as they used to.
  • Feeling worthless or guilty for things they can’t directly affect.
  • Sleeping too little or too much.
  • Abusing drugs or alcohol to help with their feelings.
  • Frequent crying.
  • Mood swings.
  • Constantly irritable or frustrated.
  • Losing or gaining a lot of weight.
  • Having trouble concentrating in school.
  • Falling grades and difficulty at school.
  • Feeling hopeless and/or helpless.

If you notice these signs in your children then you may want to speak to them first. You could consult depression treatment centers for teenagers if they’ve harmed themselves or have turned to alcohol or drugs to help with their feelings. However, if they’re only occasionally showing these symptoms, you may still be able to speak with them and encourage them to break out of those negative feelings.

How to approach your child if you think they’re depressed

You must take your child seriously when they’re feeling depressed. You want to give them space to deal with their problems and listen to everything they say. They may give clues on why they’re feeling depressed and how you could help them. If they’re not willing to speak to you, then you may find it easier to encourage them to speak to a friend or family member. Whatever you do, don’t brush aside their feelings and chalk it up to a “phase”.

While there are many ways to improve your child’s mental health, it’s important to understand that there’s no easy fix that can be applied to all children. Every child deals with depression differently. You also shouldn’t blame yourself if your child feels depressed. While there is certainly a parenting factor, it’s also heavily dependent on their environment and school conditions too.

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

Lost in Caregiver Twilight Zone
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Lost in Caregiver Twilight Zone

Looking for the Light30 Comments

Repost from 2009

We learned my gramps had months to live during a hospital stay. One very important piece of information the doctor did not share is people his age die much quicker. My gramps died in February 2010. We knew the end was near yet you were never ready. For me, times were challenging and emotions raw. You look at your loved one knowing they are dying yet you don’t want them to know you see death when you look at them. My gramps had Prostate Cancer, Bladder Cancer, and Chronic Kidney Failure. His breathing labored from not getting enough oxygen in the blood. Partially brought on by not using his oxygen. Kidney Failure caused severe anemia, and he took shots once a month to help with energy.  

*******************

December 2009

I’ve been caring for my 92-year-old grandfather for five weeks following three surgeries within seven days. I’m so tired it’s numbing. My grandfather is a man of habits driven by the time of day, maybe from his military background. One morning he was upset when the hospital had not brought his coffee and could not see he was the problem. We’re in a hospital, not the Hilton. At home, it was far worse. It does not matter that I have changed the sheets again this morning, changed his soiled underpants more than once, and got him dressed for the day. If the coffee is not ready when he expects it or I don’t have the newspaper yet, I hear about it. My grandparents raised me and I love my grandfather dearly but it’s hard to bite my tongue. I want to ask if doesn’t he realize or care that I’ve been moving since 5:00 a.m. to take care of him.

At 92 he lives at home alone, still drives (very limited), and goes to the local Senior Center several times a week to play dominos. He amazes me with each year. He is the healthiest dying person I know and in his mind, he is much younger and more capable. This makes it impossible for him to understand recovery will take several more weeks at least. I catch him doing things he shouldn’t and I get the standard “I can do it”. He also acts like a child when he doesn’t want to do something, most of the time it’s taking his medicine or getting up to move around.

I push him gently but firmly to get up and move around. Laying in bed or sleeping in the chair all day will not improve his strength. He does not like being told what to do. You learn what you’re made of in stressful times. Our minds and bodies can withstand so much to help someone we love. All I know is tomorrow is a new day.

I grew up in their house and it feels strange to stay in my old bedroom at 46. The house built in 1950, is in the hood, has no dishwasher, internet, or privacy. I am going crazy without my internet escape. I’m in the twilight zone, washing dishes by hand three times a day, and the room is the same as it was when I left home in 1981.

Tomorrow is a new day.

Melinda

Suicide Awareness Month-My Story & Tips
Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Suicide Awareness Month-My Story & Tips

Looking for the Light10 Comments


Every day is Suicide Awareness for me, suicide happens every day leaving friends and family to pick up the pieces. My father committed suicide in 1992 at 52 years old. The first time I attempted suicide was nine years old and the last time I was suicidal was last month.

You often hear it said that the person looked fine before committing suicide. We’ve listened to those words many times this year and lost several celebrities that shocked the community. Rich or poor, anyone can be affected by suicide.

You have to look for small changes, not big ones.

How is their appearance?

Are they wearing dirty clothes?

Not returning your call or answering the door.

Do they appear tired from not sleeping?

Are they completing tasks they have put off in the past?

If they avoid eye contact ask them what you can do to help?

Here’s an example of completing the task before committing suicide.

My father’s roommate found his gun, then returned everything he borrowed from my dad, mowed the yard, and by the time the Police arrived at his door hours later, the gun fired. The same story from my dad, he had no idea that his roommate was suicidal. This was the first time I had to clean up after someone killed themselves. It was so sad that his life fit in three bags of clothes and four pennies. That image will never leave.

Let’s Look At The Numbers.

Suicide statistics and 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline info: If you or someone you know is in crisis, please call or text 988, or chat at 988lifeline.org

If you or someone you know is suicidal please contact:

Connect with a trained crisis counselor. 988 is confidential, free, and available 24/7/365.

CDC developed the Suicide Prevention Resource for Action (Prevention Resource), which provides information on the best available evidence for suicide prevention.

Over 48,000 Americans died by suicide in 2021 according to the CDC. It’s difficult to get my head around that one suicide happens every 11 minutes. These numbers are before the Pandemic, and I believe the number is much higher.

I will say that guilt goes with the grieving. Grieving is different for everyone and there is no time frame, when your heart starts to heal you are close to the light.

Melinda

References:

https://www.cdc.gov/suicide/facts/index.html

Blogger Highlight-Dawn Pisturino’s Blog
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Blogger Highlight-Dawn Pisturino’s Blog

Looking for the LightLeave a comment

Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week we highlight the blog of Dawn Pisturino’s Blog.

Hello, 

I am a retired registered nurse in Arizona with a B.S. in Natural Health. My publishing credits include poems, limericks, short stories, and articles. Every writer undergoes a unique and wonderful journey. Let me share mine with you.

Official Author website (desktop or laptop work best): http://www.dawnpisturino.org

Member of Mystery Writers of America, Arizona Authors Association, and The Black List.

       AAA author page: http://www.arizonaauthors.org/members/dawn-pisturino

       My poem, Nature’s Child, won Honorable Mention in the Arizona Authors Association 2022 Literary Contest.

 Enjoy the journey.

Melinda

Looking for the Light

 

Deep Thoughts
Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Deep Thoughts

Looking for the Light35 Comments

In this fast-paced social media world, it can be difficult to find the time to look within or back in time. I hope you find these quotes and questions interesting. So glad you stopped by today!

Continue reading “Deep Thoughts” →

I’m Sending You Joy This Rosh Hashanah-Sunset September 23, 2025 –
Celebrate Life · Family · Health and Wellbeing · Holiday · Men & Womens Health

I’m Sending You Joy This Rosh Hashanah-Sunset September 23, 2025 –

Looking for the LightLeave a comment

Happy New Year! I pray you’re surrounded by friends, family and good food. As I understand it, Rosh Hashanah starts the New Year and many rituals follow back to the bible.

Melinda