Brené Brown studies human connection — our ability to empathize, belong, love. In a poignant, funny talk, she shares a deep insight from her research, one that sent her on a personal quest to know herself as well as to understand humanity. A talk to share.
Melinda
There’s no doubt about it, we’re on the verge of a mental health crisis. Although lockdown measures have been eased all over the country, critics claim that the measures put in place to get the economy back up and running are too much, too soon. However, while many debate the wisdom of reopening the economy at a time when so many are still dying from COVID-19 on a daily basis, one could argue just as fervently that an extended lockdown is a mental health crisis waiting to happen. We all need to do our part to safeguard and improve our mental health. But before you call your doctor for a prescription, you might want to consider the natural mood enhancers that are all around us. We’re talking about the healing and rejuvenating qualities of plants. Letting plants into your life can boost your mental health in a variety of ways.
Here are 5 ways in which plants can ease your stress and anxiety and help to improve your mental health.
A plant-based diet has a wide range of health benefits. But did you know that certain veggies and fruits contain natural compounds that can help to correct your brain chemistry, ease your stress, and boost your mood naturally? Get more of the following in your diet and you may find that your outlook gets a little sunnier;
Even with relaxed lockdown measures, you’re probably spending a lot more time at home these days. Why not share your home with some beautiful mood-boosting pals? Houseplants are a great addition to any interior design aesthetic. They oxygenate your living space and imbue your environment with a sense of calm and tranquility.
Of course, your home isn’t the only place where you can enjoy being close to plants. Indeed, when things get you down, getting out in the open air among trees, plants and flowers can be a real tonic for your wellbeing. Taking a walk in your local park is a great way to do this, as spending some quality time in the garden and watching your plants grow.
Plant-based health supplements like CBD oil have been linked to positive mental health outcomes in some studies, especially when managing stress, anxiety, and depression. Aches and pains can exacerbate your mental health issues, and there’s also evidence to suggest that topical application of CBD oil can ease pain caused by inflammatory conditions like arthritis.
Finally, while your cup of joe may give you a jolt in the morning, too much caffeine can actually exacerbate your stress levels and make you jittery. Instead, try a soothing infusion of green tea which is found to have calming effects on the body as well as being an excellent antioxidant.
Make plants your friends to keep you smiling through this difficult moment.
This is a collaborative post.
Melinda
I’ve written a post this month about being traumatized while staying in a Psych Hospital and want to talk about the second trauma after leaving.
I highly regard UTSW as one of the top hospitals in America and will only go there if it’s something serious, that’s how much I respect the doctors there. They have state-of-the-art technology which shows you the notes a doctor has written about you.
The other day I remembered the notes were available and went to the portal to read all of the notes from the doctor in charge the week I stayed in-house. I experienced a new level of trauma while reading his notes.
There was not one positive thing said about me, I printed out the 19 pages of notes and some misc. information. I read every page slowly and words can not express the shock. There were complete lies in there like saying I was apprehended by the police. I’ve never been apprehended by the police and the list goes on. There are entire conversations that didn’t happen. I was beyond shocked.
I reported him to the Texas Medical Board but they don’t have any ethics because they said his behavior was in line with their standards.
I thought about suing him but my Therapist warned me that the hospital could take away my privileges at the hospital. I can’t take that risk because they are the only place I will have ECT Treatments.
We talked about the anger I felt towards the doctor who traumatized me, how I don’t like not having control, wanting my medical records corrected, reining in my anger, and not over-focusing.
I also made the mistake of sending an email to my Psychiatrist with comments he made about our session. She said you don’t want to come off as a problem patient by nitpicking his notes. I’ve learned my lesson. I will apologize to him and won’t send any messages to him. I will instead make that a talking point for the next appointment.
She emphasized that I’m not on level ground right now and need to put my anger into perspective and not let this become my life. Keep my head up and that I know who I am and I’m not going to let what someone else says define my life. I was not a victim.
Now, I have to move forward by getting over what I can’t change and accept no apology is coming my way. This is not as easy as it sounds, it going to take a while to choke all that down.
*Just a note, If any of your doctors have a portal and notes from your visit are available, read them. Don’t contact them to debate the notes, just be aware of what is on your permanent medical records. If something in the notes makes you angry or is incorrect report them to the Medical Board and file a complaint with the hospital.
Now it’s time for me to eat crow!
Melinda
Melinda
Reference:
Field Guide by Stampington
First off, mad props to you for venturing into the next chapter of your life. Divorce, while super tough, can be the start of something beautiful (like owning the entire bed and never having to share the TV remote!). But, as with anything in life, there’s a right way to handle it and a slew of ways to totally muck it up.
Before we delve into the world of “post-divorce no-nos,” let’s remember one thing: This isn’t a manual on how to live your life going forward. Think of this as a cheeky guide from a well-meaning buddy who’s seen one too many pals down a pint of ice cream while watching ‘The Notebook” for the millionth time. So, without further ado, here’s our list of how not to cope with your divorce:
While those pints of Phish Food and Chunky Monkey might seem like your BFFs right now, they’re not equipped to handle emotional baggage. Go ahead, indulge once in a while, but don’t make it a three-meals-a-day kind of deal. Once you’ve dealt with your State 48 law divorce and you’re feeling low you need to feed your body a nutritious diet to help you get through the stress as healthily as possible.
Even though you might really, really want to, you need to resist the urge to go full-on FBI agent on your ex’s social media. Trust us, knowing what they had for breakfast or seeing their vacation photos won’t help your healing process. It will just leave you hung up for longer than you need to be when you need to be focused on moving on.
While it might be tempting to dye your hair neon green or tattoo “Divorced & Thriving” on your forearm, take the time to give it a bit of thought. Changes are great, but impulsivity? Not so much. Sometimes, we react to the loss by doing something crazy only to regret it soon after, so wait for a month or two, and if you still want to make that change, go for it.
A glass of wine? Sure! Downing an entire bottle while listening to sad ballads? Probably not the best idea. Alcohol might numb the pain temporarily, but it’s not a lasting solution, and could even lead to addiction down the line which would not be the kind of situation you want to find yourself in.
Slow your roll! Enjoy some “me-time” before hopping onto dating apps. Your heart needs some tender, loving care, not a rebound. Dating too soon after the breakup could lead to some poor decisions only ur part and that will just mean another breakup soon down the line, Give yourself time to heal before you get back on the scene.
Divorce is hard, so give yourself a break, give yourself time, and try to avoid the less-than-ideal habits above.
This is a collaborative post.
Melinda
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week we highlight the blog of My Mind Strength.
My Mind Strength is mental health blog providing information about mental health and much more. I strive to create a dynamic and engaging platform where I could share valuable insights, informative articles on a wide range of topics covering mental health issues thus readers seeking inspiration, knowledge, or simply a place to relax, have come to the right place, I appreciate the journey you took on to arrive.
My educational background include graduation in applied psychology honours from Delhi University & I am currently pursuing my masters in psychology. I trust in the power of therapy.
Be sure to check out their blog.
Melinda
Your home is your sanctuary away from the stresses of modern life; of course, you’ll want to feel as relaxed and comfortable there as possible. To improve your quality of life, it’s useful to consider how healthy your home is. There are many ways you can make your home a healthier space; for starters, consider these five ideas.
According to the Environment Protection Agency, ‘ Americans, on average, spend approximately 90 percent of their time indoors, where the concentrations of some pollutants are often 2 to 5 times higher than typical outdoor concentrations.’
To improve the quality of your indoor air, it’s useful to purchase an air purifier. Air purifiers sanitize the air, which often contains toxins, pollutants, or allergens. Depending on the type of filter you purchase your filter will neutralize particles, or trap particles when the air passes through the filter.
According to Live Science, ‘Indoor plants remove pollutants from the air by absorbing these gases through their leaves and roots.’ To clean your indoor air naturally, start with a few beautiful plants!
As well as removing toxins from the air, being around plants can help to boost your mood. There are so many different types of plants you can choose for your home. Aloe Vera is an excellent plant for the bedroom; these tend to emit oxygen during the night time. Chinese Evergreen plants are perfect for wet and humid conditions in the bathroom.
An EMF meter is an ‘electromagnetic field meter’; these are used to measure electromagnetic fields and radiation. Devices such as Wi-Fi routers, televisions, smartphones, and computers all emit radiation. With an emf meter in your home, you can monitor the radiation levels, and take adequate safety precautions.
During the Flint water crisis, ‘nearly 21 million Americans—about 6%—were getting water from systems that violated health standards.’ What’s more, the PSR reported that approximately ‘900,00 people get sick in the US per year,’ due to contaminated water.
By using a water filter, you can ensure that the water that you drink is contaminant free. A water filter relies on physical or chemical filtration to clean your water. A physical filtration system has a barrier to remove contaminants. Chemical filtration instead uses chemical reactions to clean the water.
Regardless of where you live, whether it’s in a family home or in supported living like the Eva Carlston Academy, taking steps like these can help you create a healthier and happier home.
Our homes should always be a sanctuary, so take steps to improve your retreat from the world, no matter where you live.
What steps have you taken to make your home a happier, healthier place?
With these five steps, you’ll be well on your way to creating a healthier home for you and your family!
This is a collaborative post.
Melinda
As a kid, I thought 40 was old, but when I reached 40, I didn’t know I was old and maybe 70 years old was the number. I know many have this crisis with their age and what they can do, along with what their future looks like.
My Gramps didn’t think about age, he just lived his life, all 92 years of it. He was playing dominos two weeks before he died.
I haven’t really looked inside to see if 60 is the number, but my husband said something the other day that got me thinking that my view of my life and capabilities at 60 are not in sync. It started with my enjoying some music videos, then a pop-up for a John Mayer concert caught my eye.
If you know me, Eric Clapton and John Mayer are my favorite guitar players, genius really. He knows I love John Mayer, so when I said: “Why don’t we go see John Mayer”. His comment sent me into a tailspin. He asked if I was up to that? What?????
I know I’m not a highly-paid executive anymore but I still think I can get it done.
I looked hard at myself, do I look old, dress too old, do my illnesses get in my way, or do my phobias keep me from wanting to go anywhere. I don’t believe it’s how I look or dress but my illnesses and phobias make me feel trapped.
Do you look ahead and think about how much joy you have in your life? Do you see a picture in your mind of what your life looks like and its blue sky and sunshine? For me, it’s not a bright picture of a whole life full of joy. I see black actually. That’s concerning to me
I looked in the mirror and my 40-pound weight loss is showing on my body, with skin sagging, and plenty of cellulite to go around. I looked at my backside and mine looked at my granny’s when she was old, it sags down.
When do we know we’re old, when do we accept that we’re old?
Right now my body and mind feel very tired, yes it’s harder to open a package or take a little longer to complete a task, but I didn’t see those as signs I was there.
I’m too tired today to think more about it but would like to know your thoughts. What age do you think is old, what are the indicators you will pay attention to?
Melinda
Today’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “the first 3 words of the first full sentence.” …. 1. Grab the closest book to you when you sit down to write your post. 2. Open it to a random page. 3. Locate the first complete sentence on that page. 4. Use the first three words of that sentence to start your post, then take it from there–write whatever comes to mind. That’s it! Have fun!
The House of Representatives has eroded since our Constitution was written. When I try to imagine what society was like in the 1700s I can’t get my head around it. This was a time when our country was forming laws for all Americans to live by. It was a chaotic time with several people eyeing the top positions.
They wrote the Constitution so that all Americans were living under one set of rules. It was the foundation our country was built on. I know there were heated debates over what should be included in the Constitution, but from what I’ve read about that time period, the worst disagreements were a shouting match. Our founding fathers were devoted to America, how to make America a better place to live and they would stand up to lead the way.
Not anymore, first of all, many politicians run so they can promote their own agenda not the agenda of the people. We’ve reached a point we’ve been in before and it’s sad and also gets my blood pressure up when I see some of the clowns from either party. We as a nation are divided, angry, and want big changes but the reality is our society mirrors our government. If our representatives delivered half of the promises made, we could start to heal.
Melinda
1. Your post must be stream-of-consciousness writing, meaning no editing (typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write. 2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop. 3. I will post the prompt here on my blog every Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a particular subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The,’” or will simply be a single word to get you started. 4. Ping back! It’s important so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours. Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below. 5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back to their post. Even better, read all of them! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later or go to the previous week by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find below the “Like” button on my post. 6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get! 7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views. 8. Have fun!
For more streams, rules, and tips for Stream of Consciousness Saturday, visit our host, Linda at: Linda G Hill
I felt dread and yet looked forward to meeting him. My original Psychiatrist is retiring after 32 years. I met last week to say goodbye and it is hard to see my future without him. It’s damn hard to have a foundation of 32 years turn into one meeting.
I left semi-happy, he lowered my anxiety meds right away and talked about a day when I will no longer need them but on occasion. I don’t see that picture and don’t have blind trust. I need to clarify what timeline and planet he’s on.
He noticed my tremors and wrote me a script but on second thought I don’t want to take any Beta-Blockers. I took them for my migraines and they slowed my heart rate, I felt heavy, and driving was difficult. He said a low dose would be ok but I’ll keep my tremors, I’ve had them for ages.
I had so much to think about, it was a first visit and I realize it took a while to build my relationship with Dr. T. When I arrived home I looked at his notes from our session. I was confused by a couple of things he said like I was chatty and my mood seemed elevated. I was so far from having an elevated mood, I told him that I could be dark inside and could still look him in the eye and say everything is fine. It’s my personality
We did talk about my cognitive challenges, and he said I did not have dementia but had mild cognitive impairment. I was open to finding out more and did some homework and by the definition from the Alzheimer Association he was right, I didn’t have dementia. Knowing this made me feel good but it doesn’t matter what you call it, it’s how it affects me daily. Interestingly I didn’t have any cognitive problems during our meeting.
He has a great reputation and it just takes time. My Psychiatrist is one of the most important people in my life. My husband went with me, I always take my husband. My ex didn’t believe anything was wrong with me so when David and I got married I brought him to every appointment. That is the easiest way, he can hear straight from the doctor, can back me up, or ask a question himself. But there is no question in his mind.
While spending my no electronics hour before bedtime I had a deep feeling, something was nagging at me. I realized the feelings were that of a victim. I saw myself at 7 years old hiding in my closet so my mother would not beat me. I had a little mansion for all my dolls to live in. Children that are abused learn to be invisible. Staying in my closet was my savior.
How does the mind go from talking about tremors to feeling like a victim? Trauma survivors often don’t understand or know when they will get triggered. Why was I feeling like the chair had been pulled out from under me? Once again I’m reminded that trauma never leaves you, it waits to strike.
I was deflated, swimming in emotions of the past, a victim. I don’t like feeling like a victim so it’s up to me to gain control. Pack all these emotions away and feel bad for the little child I was.
I’ll talk with my therapist about the feeling after meeting him and she can help with any lingering feelings. My therapist is also one of the most important people in my life.
I have Tardive Dyskinesia and he said taking a high dose of Vitamin E might help. That’s better than the medication, I stopped after 4 months because of side effects.
It was a wild day, I never saw the twist coming. That little girl grew up in a home of domestic violence, my stepfather would beat the hell out of my mother, and she would beat me, I could do nothing right and in her words “I was stupid”. I know better.
This isn’t related to the post directly. Even though my mother started trying to kill me at 6 months old by leaving me in the bathtub alone, it wasn’t until I turned 28 that I cut her out of my life. I was seeing my old therapist and brought her a book my mother sent me with a note written on the front. It said something like “I wasn’t the only one hurt”. My therapist grabbed the book, threw it in the trash, and said my mother didn’t deserve me. From that moment on I felt a huge relief.
I have a Telehealth appointment in two months. Telehealth is convenient but you can’t build a relationship the same as in person.
You now have a picture of what’s in my head.
Melinda
Melinda
Reference:
Field Guide by Stampington
In this fast-paced social media world, it can be difficult to find the time to look within or back in time. I hope you find these quotes and questions interesting. So glad you stopped by today!
August is Psoriasis Awareness month and is used as an opportunity to educate and inform sufferers on a range of topics varying from treatment, causes, triggers, and management of the inflammatory and often irritating disease.
The cause of psoriasis is still unknown but specialists do know that it is largely affected by the immune system and genetics.
Affecting men and women, all races and all ages, the disease can display on a variety of body parts at any given time therefore it is important to understand what you can do about it as and when you are affected by it. Learning to successfully manage treatment can take a long period of time but there are many ways in which the disease can be controlled and treated.
Whether you chose to do this via medication, holistic, complementary, and alternative approaches, dietary control or lifestyle choices is down to each individual but there is a huge amount of support and information available enabling you to find the best solution.
An often irritating and sometimes challenging disease, we hope you can find support to manage the symptoms successfully. The National Psoriasis Foundation website has lots of useful information to guide you.
Melinda
If you type “moving house guide” into Google, you return over 1,410,000,000 results. Odds are, a great number of these returns are comprised of articles detailing the exact same moving plan – find a good removalist, plan your utilities, pack and load your goods, hand over the keys, travel to the new home, unpack, and organize again. Rinse and repeat however many times you move.
Of course, there’s a reason this kind of advice is so prevalent. It works. Moreover, it’s not as if you can “have an opinion” on whether you’re supposed to bring your items with you from house to house, most people will be more than interested in doing so, and it doesn’t really matter if you use self-storage, ask your friends to help you, or move each possession one at a time, the end result is the same.
All of these plans and warm advisory tips are there for one reason – to make this big life change seem surmountable and even exciting. This is certainly achieved by good planning and care.
But what if you still feel quite upset without really knowing why? It’s widespread for people to feel near-distraught when moving house, even if they’re quite looking forward to the new chapter of their lives.
It’s not hard to understand why. To move is to pick up everything and move the entire orbit of your life from one focal point to another. Sure, you’re welcoming something new, but you’re also stepping into the unknown. It will alter almost everything. In some cases, it may mean moving away from friends or family for the first time. It’s not hard to see why some people struggle with this, and it doesn’t mean they’re being weak or theatrical at all.
In this guide, then, we hope to provide you with a little support should you feel this way. Let’s discuss emotional regulation during a house move, so you can contend with those intense emotions and feel calmer about the whole ordeal.
Often, the best thing you can do for heavy emotions is to process them with time. Fighting them, dismissing yourself, and even covering those emotions by never sitting down, never discussing them, or never allowing them to properly express themselves can be a mistake. Otherwise, you might bottle up your worries, and then when an inconvenience strikes, you might find yourself arguing with your partner or acting out unpredictably. Again, you don’t have to be an irrational and silly person to feel this way, as many have had episodes like this before.
It’s good to give yourself time to move, then. Have the chance to visit the new home you’ve purchased. Book a weekend getaway in the new town you plan to live in, so you can explore its surroundings, cafes, restaurants, and flow of life. Meet the locals. Take a drive to the commute for your new job or school run. If you can settle into that, then the experience feels less like diving into an icy pool from 20 meters up, instead, you’re eased into calm waters.
Moving house is an opportunity to clear out the unnecessary junk and built-up possessions that you’re hanging onto for no purpose. As we all know, moving house is expensive, and so selling some of these items may even help you raise money and feel a little less worried about the stringent budget you’re planning this move from.
For example, you might run a yard sale to get rid of your old, unnecessary items. You could decide to use cash for gold services for a quick sale of old jewelry, or perhaps even donate some goods to charity if you think they could do some good.
Most of us have drawers, cupboards, and even full rooms filled with items that we can’t remember the origin of or haven’t used for years. Don’t be afraid to let this go. Not only does this give you the chance to gather new items, but there’s a great deal of freedom that comes with letting go of unnecessary attachments.
Additionally, if you willingly let certain items go, then you can feel as though you’ve done so with autonomy and purpose, as opposed to feeling like you’re losing things out of your control thanks to the move.
Yes, we’re certain that the plans to move out of your home are quite enough thank you, and so we won’t recommend that you put together a big blowout party with entertainment, catering, and private chaperones.
However, it can be nice to enjoy “an event” dedicated to saying goodbye to your friends in the local neighborhood, even if you’re still going to come back from time to time to meet your family and friends.
This can be as simple or as complex as you’d like. Again, we’d certainly skip the five-act stage show unless you’re really into making this a blowout event, but heading to a nice restaurant with a few friends, or even having a cheese board and wine night while you play board games with your favorite neighbors and friends can be enough.
Thanks to this effort, your final memories of this property will be pleasant, and you’ll have given yourself the closure and comfort you deserve.
There’s no shame in asking for help in any capacity, especially during a once-in-a-while event like a house move. After all, it’s not as if you stoically move everything from one house to another yourself (except when moving very short distances), you enlist the services of removalists, even if you’re paying for them.
So, could it be that friends, family, or neighbors can help you? Maybe your neighbors are happy to leave space outside the street by not parking near the curb so your removalist van can come. Maybe your parents are happy to take your children for the weekend so you don’t have to worry about caring for them as you pack everything and turn off all the utilities in your household.
Perhaps a sibling or relative of yours is more than happy to take a flight to the new home and ensure they greet the removalists as they arrive, while you focus on a long-haul drive as you bring your cars with you, stopping off in hotels to break up the journey and feel a little less worn by the road. No matter your reasoning, don’t feel bad asking for help. You might genuinely need it.
When moving home, you may need to work with professionals within the real estate industry such as realtors, conveyancers, mortgage brokers, and professional movers. Hire the right professionals and you could find that they take away a lot of stress. Hire the wrong professionals and you could find that they create extra stress.
For example, a good moving company will be able to provide services like disassembly/reassembly of furniture, and boxes and even provide temporary storage. A bad moving company may add stress by breaking items, refusing to move certain items, or taking too long to transport everything.
By hiring professionals with a good reputation, you can increase the likelihood that they will take away your stress rather than adding to it. Look out for positive online reviews and professional bios such as this one from Caron Jones Burlington. A well-designed website and good rankings can be a positive sign too.
Moving into a property is effort enough without immediately having to meet all of your new neighbors, enroll in your new job, start with the school run, and begin your new life with a day to spare.
If you can, move at least a week earlier than you have to contend with all this. Give yourself a little time to deflate after all the excitement, and make sure to get plenty of rest. This is especially true if you’ve moved a long distance, and especially if you’ve gone abroad.
This isn’t just a small change, in some cases, the new environment can actually weigh you down physically, which impacts your mood and outlook. For example: if moving to a higher altitude area, then the air will be thinner than you’re used to, which is why many high-performance athletes will often train at this level so the oxygenation inspires harder work. It can take time to get used to this, let alone recovering from the long commute, let alone living without all of your usual utilities for a day or two, let alone having new social experiences, let alone getting used to managing a new property.
In other words, give yourself a break. Moving is hard, and you’re not a lazy person for feeling the effects.
Of course, so far we’ve given a range of tips for how to transition to a new home and a new life with care and focus. However, in some cases, the issues you’re experiencing may be beyond the scope of this article.
If you feel as though certain issues might not be because of the move, but have been uncovered by this new process, then it’s good to find someone to help you. Counseling services, visiting your doctor, or even discussing your worries with a therapist can make a big difference.
This way, you might notice that actually, the move has become a shorthand for your worries which extend more deeply. That’s not to say you’re going to conduct a full course of treatment right before or after a move, but be sure to give yourself space for that outcome if you need it.
We would be negligent not to mention this because after all, a move offers a healthy leverage point to springboard into better self-care and good habits.
With this advice, we hope you can enjoy better emotional regulation even during an intensive house move.
This a collaborative post.
Melinda
Have you checked out the resources available on the Organizations That Can Help page? This is one example of the extensive list of resources available.
A few changes can lead to significant benefits. This also applies to our health. Making some changes in our daily life we can put the first elements in motion for a complete rebirth. If you suffer with a chronic illness, it is even more important to start looking after your health and boosting your immune system. If you have a disability, even if you use a mobility scooter, you still try to move, only gently, if possible. Mobile scooters give disabled people the independence that they deserve and coupled with excellent diet and lifestyle, you can start to regain some confidence and happiness.
Vegetables are divided into two categories: starchy and non-starchy. Starchy vegetables are potatoes, corn and beans, non-starchy are spinach and other leafy vegetables, carrots, broccoli and cauliflower. Starchy vegetables have more calories than non-starchy ones. So by filling half the plate with non-starchy vegetables you ensure that you will receive all the necessary nutrients, water and fiber, but without many extra calories. It’s an easy strategy not to bother with calorie and portion counting. Processed carbohydrates, have almost no nutrients and no fiber. The only thing they have is calories that can make you gain weight.
In fact, a diet rich in processed carbohydrates – white bread, buns, white pastries, sweets, etc. – can increase the risk of developing type II diabetes and heart disease. Get rid of the bad habits! Unprocessed carbohydrates such as brown rice and whole grains enhance your diet with “good” calories, fiber, vitamins and minerals. Fatty fish such as salmon are an excellent source of omega – 3 fats, which are essential for good heart health and reducing inflammation in the body. They also enhance mental health. Drink green tea because this is going to be important to those with disabilities as it helps work as a toxin remover.
Quality sleep is the alpha and omega for health. And one of the things that destroys it is technology. Devices that emit “blue light”, a type of wave that is common during the day, “confuse” the brain, making it think it is morning. So by avoiding screen time before bed, you can improve the quality of sleep.
In addition to poor sleep quality, many people have trouble sleeping. This is largely due to poor rest planning. Having a specific time when you fall asleep, you train your body clock so that you can fall asleep more easily. At the same time, scheduled bedtime has a positive effect on concentration and memory.
t may seem very low on the list of things you have to do, but it is important to keep up with those regular health checks. Whether that is booking a hearing check at your local hearing center, or heading to the optician to get your eyes checked, these things are important to keep up the quality of life that you have.
Even a little negativity is enough to get you down. Try to spend more time with happy and optimistic people. If you have negative people in your inner circle, try to convey some of your positive thinking to them and change the direction. The rest is up to you and how you treat yourself. Don’t be hard on yourself and appreciate all the little things. Remember self-care is not selfish.
Collaborative Post
Melinda
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week we highlight a new blog, Life According To Sassy.
A New Book, Not Just The Turn of a Page
She writes under a pseudonym to protect her safety in a world that is unsafe for women, among others, who speak out against violence and oppression. Sassy is a survivor of domestic violence and learned first hand what it was to be silenced by those who wanted her to remain controlled.
You will want to check out the blog, she is passionate about her writing and has a story to tell.
Melinda
My two babies are Griffy, the blond dog, and the black dog Jet.
In this fast-paced social media world, it can be difficult to find the time to look within or back in time. I hope you find these quotes and questions interesting. So glad you stopped by today!
Continue reading “Deep Thoughts”I’ve been writing my thoughts and the impact on my life from Fibromyalgia for some time now and it’s time for an update.
I have been blessed to not have a full-blown flair in several months, but when I did it caused all the pain in my body to worsen.
I have bursitis in both hips and is painful long before I can get my steroid shots. I also have an injured shoulder which is painful when I sleep. When I’m not having a flair I can function except for my hips. It’s hard to sleep on one side for very long and then I have to turn over, and so and so on.
When I have a flair I can barely walk, it hurts to put any weight on my hip and my knee wants to give out. The doctor says nothing is wrong with my knee, it’s a replacement so the low-grade pain I feel is amped up.
I can’t walk without pain all over my body, sometimes in places I don’t even expect. I spent most of the winter in a terrible flair and am so grateful it has passed. But I know it will be back again and after the winter struggles my husband has a much better idea of what a flair looks like.
Even the pain I don’t feel gets amplified, and I stay in bed for many days. I’ve missed so much of my life to Fibromyalgia and several other chronic illnesses. I fell into a deep depression and wanted to kill myself, I didn’t see a future. That’s when I call my Psychiatrist and say I’m falling and can’t get up.
People might not tell you how debilitating Fibromyalgia can be but it can put your life on halt. The most important message I can share is to have a team of doctors and a therapist that supports your journey.
It takes a toll on your mental health especially if you have other chronic illnesses. Be gentle with yourself, and have self-care time set aside every day. You have to take care of mind and body.
Melinda
References:
https://health.usnews.com/conditions/fibromyalgia/fibromyalgia-tips
I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder but did not take it seriously until my father committed suicide at 52 years old. He put a gun in his mouth and it was a terrible scene. After he died I started reading about Bipolar Disorder, it said that 75% of children whose parents kill themselves will do the same. At that point, I decided I need some professional help.
Bipolar Disorder can present itself in many ways and it’s important to know so you can contact your doctor when in trouble. I’m on the depressive side and rarely go into a hypo state and have never been manic. I had a problem in the late 90s where I was switching, so one day depressed, and one day I would be fine, and then boom, I’m depressed. You need to have a Psychiatrist who can keep working on the right mix of medication to keep you stable. When looking for a Psychiatrist, the key thing to ask is do they treat Bipolar Disorder.
The most important task every day is to take your medication. I get tired of taking so many pills but I know that’s what it takes to keep me going.
Get rid of your stigmas and shut out all the people in your life who don’t care to understand or have their own stigma. You need to cut all the negatives out of you’re life as possible. I’ve quit watching the Nightly News because politics get me worked up. It’s been a big relief.
There is nothing to be ashamed of, you have an illness just like others have an illness.
Take time out every day for self-care, it could be enjoying the fresh air and listening to the birds, taking a hot bath with essential oils to calm you down, or anything you can take time out to pamper yourself is good for your mental health.
Keep all appts. with your doctor. I would also recommend seeing a therapist too. I’ve been seeing my team for over 30 years.
Take the time to learn about your illness but don’t over-focus on it. You need to know what you’re dealing with but don’t second guess your doctor. Not everything you read on the Internet is correct. Go to reliable sites for information.
If you swing to the manic state, it may feel good but as my doctor says, what comes up must come down and you won’t like the coming down part. Being manic can cause you to think differently and you can get yourself in trouble very fast.
Stay on top of your refills, you don’t want to miss any days of your medication.
Share you’re story with someone you trust, you may have to explain your illness to them but you need someone on your side. You also need someone who can tell when you’re not yourself and alert you before you slide one way or another.
You have to understand when you are at your limit. If you are thinking about suicide, now is the time to raise your hand. Call your friend for support. Worst case scenario go to the local Emergency Room.
It can seem overwhelming at first, but with good information, a great Psychiatrist and Therapist, and a friend you can trust, you have a good safety net.
Melinda
References:
I want to send a special thank you to Vital Field’s Communications Director Nassia Bitha for sending me the Pineal Gland Cell’s. If you’ve read my blog long enough you know that my relationship with Vital Field started over two years ago and I’ve reviewed many of their products. I don’t completely understand the science behind each Cell but all of the reviews I’ve done have been positive.
This post contains affiliate links for which I earn a small commission. It helps fund my coffee habit.
The cumulative expert knowledge and the science of using precisely targeted frequencies for health management and pain management are now, for the first time in history, available to end-users worldwide. Vital Field applications don’t replace or compete with traditional medicine or conventional treatment methods. They are intended to provide an alternative treatment for pain and health when conventional methods fail to provide significant results on their own. With zero negative side effects reported and over 80% reported satisfaction from customers, we are confident in offering a full money-back guarantee if our product does not work for you.
It is recommended to start with wearing the Pineal Third Eye Cell for a maximum of 30 minutes twice a day. If you are able to handle this well, the use can be increased individually, depending on how you feel.
Wear this FrequenCell for as long as you like, after pineal detoxing and pineal DNA strengthening.
It is recommended to start with wearing the Pineal DNA-Strengthening Cell for a maximum of 30 minutes twice a day. If you are able to handle this well, the use can be increased individually, depending on how you feel.
Wear this FrequenCell for 2 weeks before switching to Phase 3: Pineal Third Eye Cell.
I have tested most of the Vital Fields products and they have never let me down. It’s hard to explain how these two work but they did have a positive impact.
You can find more information on all Frequencells here
To your health,
Melinda
I want to thank Trigger Publishing Editor Andrea Marchiano for sharing Sometimes by Joann Howeth. I have enjoyed and learned so much from children’s books. Parents today have a choice of what tools they use to raise their children. There are no children’s books like the ones from Trigger, you must check out their complete selection of children’s and teen’s books.
These are great books for Grandparents to have around so they can reinforce the way you’re trying to help your child.
Sometimes, life can feel overwhelming. Sometimes, we cling to things that we should let go of. And sometimes, those who are closest to us are the ones who hurt us the most. Despite what others may tell us, during these times, the best thing we can do is talk.
In this honest and poignant story, Joann Howeth reminds us of what can happen behind closed doors and, in doing so, encourages kids to tell their own stories to ensure they get the support they need. A must-have for every library, classroom, and therapist’s office, this book will reassure struggling children that they are not alone and help them find a safe and healthy outlet for their troubles.
This is the most serious children’s book I’ve read and think all children need to read this book because it shows them that sometimes you have to tell your secrets to someone you can trust. This book will help children struggling with divorce, lack of money, or other struggles that go on behind closed doors. One very important piece of information is missing, it’s her name. This goes along with her secret.
She has many secrets that she keeps to herself and the pressure it puts on her is heavy. Her Dad is gone and her mother is in a bad place, it could be from mental health issues or she just can’t make ends meet. Often times when she goes to the refrigerator there is no milk, or when she wants to wash her hair there is no shampoo and the house is stacked full and running over including the moldy dishes.
She is not allowed to participate in school activities or go to barbecues and is isolated from friends because she doesn’t want anyone to know her secrets.
She feels so alone and embarrassed and her mother has said no one can come into their house. She has no friends except the neighbor who is kind to her. Her room is filled with items her mother has collected and it crowds out her sleeping space, sometimes she sleeps in a chair or will sit on the stoop.
Her neighbor has a good idea of what is going on and she offers her a string cheese, an apple, and a hug on the way home from school. One day she realized her neighbor knew what was going on and asked her not to tell. Her trusted friend, Mrs. McGeorger said sometimes you have to share with someone.
This is happening today much more than we know it and we can’t judge or blame the children. I had many secrets growing up, I was abused and my step-father was an alcoholic. I didn’t want any friends to come to my house for fear of getting a glimpse of what was truly happening. I didn’t trust anyone, that was a heavy burden for a child to carry around every day.
This book is for parents, grandparents, therapists, and schools, all children need exposure to what can happen behind closed doors, it may help a child come forward or at least make them less judgemental. I love this book, it was hard to swallow but I could relate so clearly and know there are plenty of children that have secrets.
We have built a first-class resource of curated books produced and published in-house to create a unique collection of mental health recovery titles unrivaled in quality and selection. We work with experts, psychologists, doctors, and coaches to produce our books, but we also work with real people looking to share their stories to reach out to others and provide hope, understanding, and compassion. These brave authors also aim to raise awareness of mental health’s “human” face and its impact on everyday lives.
Melinda
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week we highlight the blog of Stella Reddy’s Blog.
My site is about how I have healed and what I did to achieve that. I am open about my mistakes, share all I have experienced and learned, and share my innermost thoughts over it all. I made a site about me, to be found with theirs, in case anyone is interested if not, that’s okay too. I do it for my own peace of mind, knowing my truth is there, to drown out their nastiness in my name.
Always, upwards and onwards!!
You will love her blog and she’s great to talk to.
Melinda
In this fast-paced social media world, it can be difficult to find the time to look within or back in time. I hope you find these quotes and questions interesting. So glad you stopped by today!
There are more Health Apps than a year ago and it’s getting crowded so you may be inclined to pick one. BEWARE! More research is needed before you ever sign up! One important thing to remember is these Apps are not regulated, as some Apps are unscrupulous including where your information is being shared, and more importantly are the Therapists and doctors who are providing support are licensed.
Let me tell you about an App that offered the services of a medical doctor. The App would refer people to the doctor and the doctor was a fraud! The medical doctor who would write pain medication was not a licensed doctor. The DEA got wind of this and started watching him. They busted the doctor for prescribing more pills than allowed, writing his own scripts when the patients didn’t have one and if I recall correctly he had prescribed over 15,000 scripts for pain meds, many patients were left addicted to pain meds and had to find help elsewhere. He is spending only 5 years in jail, that is the scary part.
When an App includes the service of a Therapist or Medical Doctor you have to make sure they have the proper license to do so. One way I would do it is look ask what doctor they use and then do a search on them. Find out they are legit. The same with a Therapist, the wrong Therapist can set you back not moving forward. I would check them out as well.
Then I would look closely at the Privacy Policy, and read carefully who they are sharing your information with. Some are sharing your information with hospitals doing research for which they are probably paid to share. If the Privacy Policy doesn’t spell it out, that would be a red flag for me. I would write them and ask where your information is being shared. You’re not signing up to help a research project, your signing up because you want help. If someone is sharing your information, my thought is there in it for money. Beware.
Ask around to see who has used the App in the past or what other App they use. You have to look at it like finding a new doctor. You don’t throw a dart to pick one, you check them out first. I would also do research on the App it’s self, see what you find on the Internet about them. You may be surprised. I’ve written about several Apps in the past and can tell you one is already out of business.
Take a step back before you join any App and make sure you’re getting what you expect, not that wako doctor with no license prescribing medicine of any type.
Melinda
References:
In America we have the FDA to approve all prescription medications, manufacturers have to prove their drug has all the data on clinical trials, and they even do down to approving what the label can have on it. If the FDA is not satisfied the FDA will tell the manufacturer to go get this information and reapply. That’s critical to know. In America, we have a system that all prescriptions go thru before being released to the public. They also have a section you can report adverse reactions or a medical device that failed. We have a system.
I know that people with chronic illnesses especially those with chronic pain have trouble getting the pain management they need and out of frustration turn to the Internet. BEWARE!
There are other countries that have a system in place but we have no idea if it matches our standards. There are also countries that have no system to verify the drugs are pure, they do what they say and they are monitored.
The FDA says this about online Pharmacies.
If you buy from any online site from another country, you have no guarantee of what’s inside. It could cause more harm to your body, it could have nothing in there to help you, and the worst is it can be laced with different products and can kill you.
That’s strong words I know but I have read too many articles and heard of personal stories where buying online was the worst move to make.
Melinda
References:
Yes, there are ligament Pharmacies online, I would check them out before you buy. Do an Internet search on the Pharmacy. You may be surprised what you find or you see they are legit Pharmacies you can go to. The key is what country is your medication coming from.
Where you can protect yourself is to search, search, and search before buying. Your health and life are more important. Personally, I would not buy a drug online unless my insurance company offers an online Pharmacy.
I haven’t seen the movie but I have heard about it for years. The key thing to remember is this is a movie, an overdramatic movie. Was Electro Convulsive Therapy more difficult in the old days yes, before doctors figured out that muscle relaxers would stop the body movements there was the possibility of breaking a bone.
So if you take out the overdramatic scenes that are barbaric you would probably see something still very scary. But ECT has come a long way and I want to take you back to before ECT and you will see that even in its infancy ECT was a much better option.
Before ECT they did Lobotomies which left the person unable to function without full-time help. I don’t know how the procedure is done but It’s been described as a screwdriver was put thru your Frontal Lobe. Rosemary Kennedy had the procedure and it changed the family’s life forever. You see, much of our thinking is in the Frontal Lobe. Her parents thought they were the right thing but they were not prepared for what the outcome was.
You can see how a Lobotomy took her life away. Thank goodness doctors learned how to do ECT. Yes, it was difficult initially but now it’s a piece of cake. Friday I get my 27th ECT treatments in 20 years. I have Bipolar Disorder and stay mostly on the depressed side. Two weeks ago I was ready to kill myself, I always tell my husband when I get suicidal. I went into a Psych Hospital for a week for treatment and observation then moved to outpatient. It’s hard to say out loud that I’ve had 27 treatments, that sounds like a lot. But when you start planning to kill yourself it’s a small price to pay for getting well.
Now it’s so easy and it’s over before you even know. Most times I wake up from Anesthesia and think I’m still waiting for treatment. Here’s what you can expect for ECT, first you have to remember everyone is different and so is their level of depression and those with more serious Mental Illnesses may require more or less treatment. For me, the number seems to be between 6 to 9 treatments to get me out of the dark hole I’m in.
You will come into the ECT area and with your clothes on the nurse goes thru your medication, checks your blood pressure and you pee in a cup. Then you are moved to the operating room where you talk to the doctor and Anesthesiologist. I often get sick after so they add something to the mix that will take care of getting sick. The shoe on one foot will be exposed so they can tell when the seizure is over. You are hooked up to an EKG monitor and two stickies are put on your forehead. Then two stickies are put behind your ear to monitor the seizure. You start to feel the medicine take effect and an oxygen mask is put on. It takes less than 5-10 minutes and you are back in recovery. You won’t remember anything after you go off to sleep and the only lingering effects might be a headache and some jaw pain.
I take a baggie with two Tynenol and one Xanax to take as soon as I get back to the truck. My husband stops by the coffee shop and gets me a cold Latte and off to the house we go. The first day you may be tired. I often will go lie down after I eat and wake feeling well rested. Sometimes you have to go in very early and I need my sleep.
If you are so depressed it interferes with your life, your sleeping all the time, you don’t care to do the things you once did or you want to kill yourself, it’s time to raise your hand and ask for help. One tip I will give you from my own experience is don’t go to a Psych Hospital that is not connected to a hospital. I know that may be harder for you to find but believe me when I tell you that the stand-alone treatment centers are there to make money off of you. I spent three weeks in one and was outraged by how the patients were treated. They were zombies during the day and given medication to make them sleep. The only place to have any type of activity was the table we ate lunch on. I stood my ground and did not let them change my medication. I received no kindness, no support, no dignity really. I stayed in my room and read. That is not the type of place that is going to get you well.
If you have a Mental Illness that causes you to have big swings into depression start now looking for the nearest respected hospital that has a Psych Unit. The care you get is night and day and that is the only reason I can write today.
If you have any questions I would be happy to answer any and all questions you have. ECT has saved my life many times over the past 20 years and I can tell you it’s much better than death.
Melinda
References:
https://www.jfklibrary.org/learn/about-jfk/the-kennedy-family/rosemary-kennedy
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week we highlight a new blogger, Second Chances.
CONTENT GUIDANCE: This blog has strong language, explores aspects of mental health, domestic violence ,drug abuse, alcohol abuse, and suicide. Please read with caution!
Hi all!!! I’m Rae,37 year old mom, blogger,AR analyst,addiction advocate/coach. My all time favorite time of year is fall 🍁🍁🍁.
Her blog covers many serious topics and I know you will find her post enjoyable.
Melinda
How can I say that? We are emotional people, even those who try to be strong will have crises. When a spouse or child dies, a bad car wreck, you lose your job, your child is addicted to drugs, the list goes on. This is not a mental illness it’s an emotional crisis from what is happening in your life.
My crisis started with low-grade depression, being diagnosed with Kidney Disease, my husband being diagnosed with two types of cancer, and I had two repressed memories come back to me. With all that being down on me, I couldn’t handle it anymore.
We’ve all had or will have something traumatic happen that will affect us deeply and cause emotional distress. We are human beings and as such we do get emotional scars we have to work thru. Sometimes it’s as simple as talking to someone and having a good cry, other times you may need a Therapist to work thru the pain. They are trained to listen and talk about ways to help you cope. I’ve been seeing a Therapist for 30 years, she has helped me process the trauma of my childhood and is a good ear when a new issue comes up and I’m not sure how to handle it.
According to Vice Chair of Adult Psychology Elissa Epel, Ph.D., If you feel in crisis or overwhelmed, it may be helpful for you to make a list of what you can and cannot control right now. In this guide, we suggest radical acceptance of the situations we cannot control, and focus on what we can do.
I’ve experienced my share of trauma and have moved past the pain, it was holding me back in life. My Therapist was a big part of overcoming the trauma that ruled my life and I am stronger for it. I believe stress and trauma can turn your life upside down. I’ve already stopped watching the national news, too much politics that get me extremely worked up. I feel less stressed already.
Before you experience an emotional crisis, look at your habits, really examine your life and cut negative people out of your life, I don’t care if they are family, you don’t want negative influences around you. If your friends aren’t supportive of you, they are not your friends, if politics get you jacked up, don’t watch the news.
I think social media can have a negative effect on our health. The way I look at social media is it’s a place I share my post with. I follow very few people and I always assume the person on the other end is not who they say they are. That’s reality. You see news stories every day of stalking, raping, or trolling. If you have a mindset that people are not who they say they are, you won’t get pulled into a bad situation. That might sound harsh but it’s a reality. You do not know the person on the other end, and you don’t know their motive, instead look at them as Social Media friends, not the type of friends you have in your life outside of Social Media.
We can never prepare for when an emotional crisis will hit us, we can do everything right and we’re still going to face a crisis in our life. Talk to someone, don’t keep it inside for the pain and stress don’t go away on their own.
When my grandparents died I was devastated, how could I live without them, they were my rock and my parents because my parents were abusing me. Long before I went into therapy, my granny was the one I talked to about teenage trauma. She always said it would pass, I would say if your emotional crisis is interfering in your life in the least, go talk to a therapist.
I’ve worked thru most of my emotional crisis but still have two repressed memories to discuss, luckily they are not interfering in my life and I will see my Therapist soon.
An emotional crisis is NOT a mental illness, I will say as a person with Bipolar Disorder that an emotional crisis can bring on depression but being depressed about losing someone you love is natural and from our heart. It’s when our heart is breaking that an emotional crisis can happen.
Melinda
References:
lookingforthelight.blog 