Men & Womens Health

“#SoSC” Prompt for Week is *tast-

Have a great weekend and thanks for reading, I appreciate all your comments. M

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “-tast-.” Find a word that contains “tast” and use it in your post. Enjoy!

The one thing you never know when you are chronically ill is when you will feel “normal” again, do much needed activities and much needed self-care. I struggle with several chronic illnesses and I’ve hit a good run for the past month and it feels FANTASTIC! I work hard not to over do things but work diligently to take advantage of the time I have for quality time with my loved ones, including my four legged babies.

Thanks for reading and stopping by my blog today. I appreciate all your comments.

Melinda

Join us for the fun and sharing good media stories. 

For more on the Stream of Consciousness Saturday, visit Linda Hill’s blog. Here’s the link:https://lindaghill.com

Here are the rules for SoCS:

  1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
  2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.
  3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The’,” or simply a single word to get your started.
  4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours. Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.
  5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.
  6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!
  7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.
  8. Have fun!

 

Men & Womens Health

Today in History

Photo by Andrey Grushnikov on Pexels.com

52 BCE

The Gallic Wars have raged for eight years, with Julius Caesar leading much of the Roman Republic’s charge against the tribes of Gaul in Western Europe. An inability to band together against their common enemy dooms the Gallic tribes, and the struggle ends at the Battle of Alesia.

1895

Stephen Crane’s novel ‘The Red Badge of Courage‘ is released in book form for the first time. Not yet born when the Civil War ended, the young author weaves a narrative of America’s great cataclysm, now 30 years gone, with such verisimilitude that critics will call him a master of Realism

1942

A new Nazi ‘Wunderwaffen,’ or ‘weapon of wonder,’ is fired in a test flight, and the missile’s top 52.5-mile altitude is so high it becomes the first manmade object to enter outer space. In less than two years Germany will begin launching thousands of V-2 rockets, mainly against Belgium and the UK.

1990

In what will later be celebrated as ‘Unity Day,’ a country torn in two after the Second World War is reunited as the once Soviet-controlled East Germany is dissolved and its territory and citizens merged with the Federal Republic of Germany, formerly known as West Germany.

Men & Womens Health

Helpful advice for aspiring writers of all ages

IDEAS.TED.COM

Sep 11, 2019 / Daryl Chen

Being a writer is all about expressing your unique perspective with feeling and originality, not about having a huge vocabulary or getting published, says author Jacqueline Woodson. She shares a little of what she’s learned in the process of writing a lot (30+ books!).

This post is part of TED’s “How to Be a Better Human” series, each of which contains a piece of great advice from someone in the TED community; browse through all the posts here.

“Write something good, and feel good about writing it.” 

That sentence is from award-winning writer Jacqueline Woodson — she just released Red at the Bone, a novel for adults — in response to the question “What’s the goal of writing when you’re 15?” (Side note: I, the interviewer, did not pose that query; she did. Yep, Woodson is the kind of intimidating and articulate person who can come up with thoughtful questions and during an interview.)

That sentence is great advice for writers of any age. And so, just because I can, I will repeat it: “Write something good, and feel good about writing it.”

Woodson and I are talking about writing because I’m a fan of hers and because I’m a mentor in a writing program for high-schoolers in New York City (Girls Write Now). I wanted to hear what insights and inspiration she had to offer those who aspire to do what she does. Once upon a time, she was a girl with a passion for words — “from the gate, I was like, ‘I want to be a writer — I want to write everything: poetry and short stories and fiction and …’” She’s gone on to write more than 30 books — including Miracle’s BoysBrown Girl Dreaming and After Tupac and D Foster — that span all those categories and then some. Decades later, she still loves to write and re-write (more on the latter below).

Here’s what she had to say to aspiring writers: 

Do you know lots of impressive words? Good — but keep them to yourself 

“You don’t need to have a great vocabulary. What you need to have is a creative way of using the words you have. I think sometimes it is detrimental to writers to have too much of a vocabulary because they just rely on the word that they know how to define and they end up breaking the first rule of writing: Show, don’t tell.”

No one else sees the world quite the same way you do, so share your unique perspective 

“Writing is about narrative language and creative language and being able to get a point across in a way that is not ordinary. More than having a large vocabulary, one needs a large vision and be able to see the world in a different way than other people see it.”

Look at picture books, even if you think you’re too old for them 

“Young writers can learn so much from reading picture books and really engaging in the text and how the language is laid on the page. With picture books, [writers] are working with a reader who has a very short attention span and you have to get them from line one and hold them to page 32. That’s a challenge, but it’s also a challenge that’s not going to be intimidating for a young writer. It also allows them to experiment with tone and form, especially poetic form, because picture books are intentional, the line breaks are intentional, and each line is laying down an image.”

Woodson recommends checking out the illustrated books that have been named recipients of the Caldecott Medal or the Coretta Scott King Book Award

Write with feeling

“Writing is visceral. If you write something down and don’t feel some kind of way, then it’s not working. It’s not doing what you wanted to do.”

If it’s possible, set limits on the initial feedback you receive

“When I first write something, I show it to three people I trust. I tell them: ‘Tell me every single thing you love about it.’ That’s all I want to hear because it’s embryonic. It’s so fragile at that point because it’s so new that I’m not ready for questions, I’m not ready for it to be evaluated in any way. I just want to know what you love, because that’s going to make me excited to go back and write more of it.”

Seek out books that reflect you and your experience 

“Dr. Rudine Sims Bishop talks about the importance of kids having both mirrors and windows in their fiction. (editor’s note: Bishop is referring to kids having the chance to read books that reflect them and their lives and books that give them portals onto different kinds of lives.) I think especially in our culture kids get a lot of books by white writers, no matter their color, so they can’t even imagine themselves as an Asian girl, a black girl, someone who is indigenous [and] being able to have a narrative. It’s hard to have a writer believe, ‘Yeah, I have license to tell a story without getting in trouble.’ To see parts of her narrative in cultures as close to hers as possible is helpful.”

If you can’t find writing that mirrors you, take it as your chance to fill in the gap 

“As a kid, you have a right to be in the world fully and you have a right to see representations of yourself wherever you go. And if you don’t, write your way out. (editor’s note: like Alexander Hamilton.) Figure out why that is so, and rather than fixating on the dilemma of it, challenge it. Write the challenge, and that’s where your writing’s going to break through and create something new.”

Being a writer means being a re-writer

“Writing is a lot of work. When I look at Brown Girl Dreaming, I rewrote that book 33 times. When I look at Another Brooklyn, I rewrote that about 16 times. I think people like the idea of being writers; I don’t think they like being re-writers.

but what if you don’t like to re-write? 

“You’re not going to like everything. There are some things that are going to be painful and you don’t want to do them, but the end result is going to be something that is better. I love re-writing now, but I’m old. I love it because I know when I finish re-writing, it’s going to be better than it was when I first wrote it.”

Get ready for your stories, articles, poems and essays to unravel — all of them

“It happens with every single piece. Your writing gets to this point, and it’s so fabulous and you love it. And then it falls apart. That’s the point where you have to start scaffolding it and building it and trying to figure out what is this piece trying to say and how is it trying to say it. A lot of people stop when the piece falls apart and think they’re going to start another one and they’re all going to fall apart.”

don’t stop. 

“It’s going to be the difference between finishing something and having a whole bunch of half-finished things in your drawer. For people who are starting out writing, know that your piece of writing is going to fall apart and it’s going to get really hard. But it’s the best place to be, because now your work is ahead of you. And you know what you have to do to make it better.”

Don’t fixate on getting published. 

“Whenever kids start asking me about their stuff getting published, I’m like, ‘That’s not what you should worry about. You should worry about writing the best piece that you possibly can.’ Writing is such a process. It’s an ongoing process, and you don’t write something in September and have it published by December. It takes much longer. If you really want to invest in the world of writing, you have to invest time and labor and faith in it.”

Jacqueline Woodson spoke at TED2019 in Vancouver; her talk will be posted here shortly. 

Men & Womens Health

Where Do You Turn When Teacher is Bullying

This is a repost from 2014, the point is schools have gone from sending notes about children being overweight to lunch shaming. I look back at my childhood, kids were bullied by other kids if they had a lunch coupon. I didn’t understand the problem then and certainly find it unacceptable this is happening by school staff today.  

Melinda

 

 

Monday, May 26, 2014

Mom Upset That 9-Year-Old Girl Brought “Overweight” Notice Home From School

Great video, please see the kids reaction to letter.

http://www.nbcnewyork.com/video/#!/on-air/as-seen-on/Mom-Upset-That-9-Year-Old-Girl-Brought-Overweight-Notice-Home-From-School/260472731

The mother of a third-grade girl says she’s upset that the city Department of Education sent home a health assessment in her daughter’s book bag that categorizes the 9-year-old as “overweight.” Roseanne Colletti reports. Each year, 870,000 New York City public school students in kindergarten through grade 12 are handed their Fitnessgram assessments and told to bring them home without peeking inside.

Laura Bruij Williams says her daughter, Gwendolyn Williams, looked at hers, and asked her about it one night while getting ready for bed at their Staten Island home. Gwendolyn is 4 feet 1 inch tall and weighs 66 pounds.
The analysis said her Body Mass Index is “overweight.” “She said ‘Mom, school told me that I’m overweight,'” Williams told NBC 4 New York. “I was very angry and upset because I don’t want this to be the kind of thing that sticks with her.”

The Department of Education says the assessments are “based on whether an individual student is in the Healthy Fitness Zone for their age and sex.” They are supposed to be sealed and given to parents only, so that the adults can start conversations with their kids about good eating habits and exercise. Williams, who says her daughter is active and healthy, said she would have preferred the assessment be given directly to parents so that children aren’t even tempted to look. She said a friend of Gwendolyn’s was in tears about her assessment. “I think they should be sent to parents, mailed home or have them finished for conferences,” Williams said.

 

Sometimes we think magazines and media portraying extremely thin girls and women result in body image issues. I have not seen any studies yet know first hand how it feels to have a warped sense of your body. I had unhealthy body image issues by fifth grade and dreaded P.E. class. I was probably 10 pounds under weight but wanted to look like my Farrah poster. I would not take part in sports because I imagined how fat I looked in the short shorts running track or playing basketball. I think most teacher’s understand the pressure on all kids today. This school and Teacher became part of the problem. Talk to the school Principle and Teacher to discuss their process for communicating with parents. If you feel the process it lacking or potentially harmful to your child let them know. Then write a letter to School Board addressing concerns. I would be the soft-spoken mother who loses it, the school is bullying the kids and parents. The scars on the kids that can last a lifetime. Not all parents would recognize weight issues that young and could miss an opportunity to save their kids and themselves much grief. You pay taxes for your child’s education, speak up and hold school accountable. 

Warrior

Men & Womens Health

7 Conditions That Can Mimic Fibromyalgia (And Getting The Right Diagnosis) — Guest Blogger There Is Always Hope

Fibromyalgia is a condition that consists of widespread muscle pain, cognitive failures and fatigue. Because there is no standard blood test or other medical test to identify Fibro, doctors rely on Patient stories and history to make a determination, along with using the “tender point” test. When you have Fibromyalgia, there are particular tender points […]

7 Conditions That Can Mimic Fibromyalgia (And Getting The Right Diagnosis) — There Is Always Hope
Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

The bias of mental illness — Guest Blogger Shedding Light on Mental Health

When I ask a group of participants to think of all the words associated with someone who has mental illness here’s what I get: crazy, looney, nuts, attention seeking, dangerous, violent, etc. Then I ask the question what are words you hear about a cancer survivor. Those words are: hero, warrior, brave, strong, etc. Then […]

The bias of mental illness — Shedding Light on Mental Health
Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Keep Speaking Out About Pain

Keep speaking out.
My personal path into patient advocacy began with speaking at conferences about my struggle with complex regional pain syndrome, and, then, writing a book about it. But I know first-hand that speaking up isn’t easy–it can leave you feeling vulnerable and exposed, and it requires your already-limited energy and time. 
That’s why I’m so grateful to each pain warrior who has participated in our #LetsTalkAboutPain campaign. Whether commenting on a Daily Challenge post on social media, sharing a video as part of our Storyathon, attending an online event, or participating in any other way — your efforts make a difference.
There’s one week left for Pain Awareness Month. Let’s make it count!

Sincerely,
Nicole HemmenwayInterim CEO, U.S. Pain

Men & Womens Health

Today is World Gorilla Day

Photo by Chris Carter on Pexels.com
 
Hi, Tomorrow is World Gorilla Day!

You are part of a special few to get a sneak peek at Portia’s messagefor tomorrow, World Gorilla Day!

Share, post and talk about gorillas as much as possible. The more we get the word out there, the more people we can get behind saving our closest relative (there are still only 1,000 mountain gorillas left in the wild!).

Let’s show everyone that there’s hope, and together we can do something about it!

We’ve attached some images for you to post! Happy (early) #WorldGorillaDay!

Love,

The Ellen Fund Team
Men & Womens Health

Chronic Pain Awareness Month : September 2019 — Guest Blogger Invisibly Me

Chronic pain – A complex issue that affects everyone differently. The one thing we all have in common? Chronic pain is a chronic pain in the ass to deal with! Chronic Pain : A Chronic Problem Pain can affect you physically, socially and psychologically, impacting everything from sleep and mental wellbeing, to work and relationships. […]

Chronic Pain Awareness Month : September 2019 — Invisibly Me
Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Lyme Treatment Stuck? Try These Steps at Six Months and Beyond

 Dear Subscriber,

There are a number of things that can block your recovery from Lyme disease. If you have been on antibiotics for six to nine months and you are not getting better, there are additional steps to take. In Treatment Stuck? Try These Steps at Six Months and Beyond I describe how to move your treatment forward.

In my Seattle practice, I discovered ways to move the treatments forward of my patients. In Treatment Stuck? Try These Steps at Six Months and Beyond I describe my formula. Read and watch this article to see if effective treatments are right for you.

In Health,

Marty Ross MD
 Read or Watch NowSpread the Word!  ShareTweetForwardQuality Matters. You can find the various supplements I use effectively in my Seattle practice at Marty Ross MD Supplements.
 Look Now
Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Gluten-Free Basic Salad Dressing and Salads

Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

From Mary Frances McFadden, Jackson Township, New Jersey

Basic Salad Dressing

Ingredients:

1/2 cup water

1/4 cup apple cider vinegar or white vinegar

1 teaspoon white sugar

1/4 teaspoon salt

Pinch of black pepper

1 teaspoon celery seed

Fresh herbs of your choice (parsley, rosemary, thyme, dill or other)

Cucumber Salad

Peel one or two cucumbers and slice into rounds. Use English cucumbers or peel if skin is tough. Place in bowl. Throughly mix or shake ingredients for dressing and pour over cucumbers. Chill well in refrigerator before serving. 

Cole Slaw

Peel and grate two carrots and one half green cabbage and place in bowl. Pour dressing over bowl and refrigerate. 

 

Men & Womens Health

“#SoSC” Prompt for Week is *Wrap/Rap

The word Wrap, the first thing that came to mind is this great song.

When I think of Rap songs there is one that stands out above all, you can’t get it out of your head.



Have a great weekend and thanks for reading, I appreciate all your comments. M

Join us for the fun and sharing good media stories. 

For more on the Stream of Consciousness Saturday, visit Linda Hill’s blog. Here’s the link:https://lindaghill.com

Here are the rules for SoCS:

  1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
  2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.
  3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The’,” or simply a single word to get your started.
  4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours. Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.
  5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.
  6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!
  7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.
  8. Have fun!

 

Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Remembering Mom Part 3 – How to Help Your Dementia Loved One — Guest Blogger Hindsight: My Journey

Realizing your parent or any loved one may have dementia is a tough one. I live with the regretful feeling that I should have recognized it sooner. At the time I was absorbed with my own life drama, but that’s no excuse. My hope is that what I learned as a daughter, observer and eventual […]

Remembering Mom Part 3 – How to Help Your Dementia Loved One — Hindsight: My Journey
Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Billie Eilish opens up about mental health: ‘I didn’t think that I would even make it’ to 17

Charles Trepany, USA TODAYPublished 10:22 a.m. ET Sept. 5, 2019

Billie Eilish is getting real on her mental health.

The “Bury a Friend” songstress confessed in her cover story for Elle magazine that, despite early career success, she hasn’t always been happy. 

“Two years ago, I felt like nothing mattered; every single thing was pointless,” she said in the article published Thursday. “Not just in my life, but everything in the whole world. I was fully clinically depressed. It’s insane to look back and not be anymore.”

Eilish has been accused by trolls of faking her depression, which she admitted have been painful to read.

“It hurt me to see that,” she said. “I was a 16-year-old girl who was really unstable. I’m in the happiest place of my life, and I didn’t think that I would even make it to this age.”

More: Billie Eilish, 17, rips Nylon Germany for topless cover: I ‘did not consent in any way’

The 17-year-old said her mental health has since improved, calling happiness a “crazy” feeling.

“I haven’t been happy for years,” she said. “I didn’t think I would be happy again. And here I am—I’ve gotten to a point where I’m finally okay. It’s not because I’m famous. It’s not because I have a little more money. It’s so many different things: growing up, people coming into your life, certain people leaving your life.”

More: Believe the hype: Billie Eilish proves she’s a once-in-a-generation talent at NYC concert

The singer added she wants people to know there’s hope on the other side of depression.

“For anybody who isn’t doing well, it will get better,” she said. “Have hope. I did this (expletive) with fame riding on my shoulders. And I love fame! Being famous is great, but it was horrible for a year. Now I love what I do, and I’m me again. The good me. And I love the eyes on me.”

Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward · Survivor

We Don’t Talk Much About Debt and Depression. This Blogger Is Changing That

Melanie Lockert remembers checking the traffic for her blog, Dear Debt, and feeling shocked at the results.

Someone had found her site by searching, “I want to kill myself because of debt.”

Lockert started Dear Debt in January 2013 after spending the previous year feeling depressed about her student loans. She posted monthly updates about her efforts to pay off $81,000 while working temporary hourly gigs before she landed a role running communications and planning events for a nonprofit. Along the way, she was open about her mental health struggles and how they were tied to her debt.

She had created her blog as a way to stay positive while she paid off the debt. But looking at the search terms that brought readers to her site made her recognize that her accountability stretched far beyond herself.

“It gave me an instant sense of purpose,” Lockert said.

She had attended counseling the previous year, after negotiating with a graduate student clinic to pay $5 per session while she was underemployed. She knew how much her debt affected her outlook.

She read up on the link between debt and depression. She saw she was far from alone.

“I found out that people who die by suicide are eight times more likely to have debt,” Lockert said. “From the emails I get, I know that debt is really affecting families and their mental health and their ability to find joy.”

People with debt are three times more likely to suffer from depression, according to a 2013 study published in the Clinical Psychology Review.

Lockert wrote a short post for people with debt who were feeling hopeless.

“You are not alone,” she declared. “You are not a loan.”

Still thinking about those search terms, she wrote another post.

“I want to jump through my computer and give you a hug,” she wrote. “Shake you and say your life is worth so much more.”

Then, she started getting emails from people who were desperate and afraid.

What Happened When She Wrote a Letter to Her Debt

A few months into blogging, Lockert wrote her first breakup letter to her debt.

“Dear Debt,” the letter reads. “You do not define me. My worth is more important than the value of your number. Love, M.”

After writing her own breakup letter with debt, Lockert then published an estimated 100 breakup letters with debt from her readers. Photo courtesy of Melanie Lockert
Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward

Christa’s Story

RAINN.ORG

Christa is a Survivor of Sexual Assault, her story is hard to read and yet she comes out on top. She was able to more forward and rebuild her life. She has the strength like many of you.

 

“When you speak with a survivor of sexual assault, imagine that they are a loved one who has gone through this. How would you want them to be treated?”

Christa Hayburn was sexually assaulted by a superior at the Police Department where she served as a law enforcement officer.

For the next two years she did not report the assault to the department for fear of losing her job. When she experienced an unrelated injury and found out that she could no longer work as a police officer, she finally felt that she could report the assault to the Internal Affairs Department. After turning in a written description of the assault, she was taken to an interrogation room and questioned by two detectives for 6-8 hours.

“They whisked me away as soon as they saw that this involved a person in a position of power. That day was very retraumatizing.”

Christa says the department and the city did not take her report seriously or take measures to ensure that the perpetrator could not sexually assault others. After filing her report, Christa faced retaliation from the city. They expressed doubt about Christa’s medical reports regarding the injury that prevented her from continuing to serve on the police force, and appointed a private investigator to follow her.

Over the next four years, Christa fought against city officials to make sure that her report of sexual assault was investigated appropriately and that her injury was taken seriously. She eventually resigned from the department. Later, two more women reported being sexually assaulted by the same perpetrator, who had been promoted to deputy inspector.

Christa filed a federal retaliation lawsuit against the city, entering an extended legal process. She ultimately decided to discontinue the case for the good of herself and her family. “The day before my deposition I read through my internal affairs report and saw all the transcripts attacking me and attacking my credibility…trying to find flaws in me and my story,” says Christa. “I thought to myself—I’m done. How much more can I put myself through? When do I say, ‘enough is enough? That’s when I started a journey of setting boundaries for myself.’”

Christa is disappointed in the way her case was handled and believes that police departments need to have more training about how to work with survivors and those who have experienced trauma. At the department where she worked, Christa says that “Not only are these incidents happening, but then the institution goes after the victim and protects the perpetrator.”

As a law enforcement officer herself, she saw her role as someone who should act with integrity to protect and serve her community. “I’ve led my life following the law. It’s so disheartening to see the department not following the standards of honor and integrity they hold others to.”

Christa is thankful that she can continue to help survivors through sharing her own story and letting others know they are not alone. “Who am I? I had no position of power within the police department. But I knew that consistently telling my story would help someone else.” Christa served as a star witness for another victim of the same perpetrator, and her testimony helped win the case.

Because of the sexual assault, Christa has experienced PTSD, depression, and suicidal ideation. She found therapy and medication helpful in getting her through some particularly difficult periods of her healing, but regaining her sense of self has been most crucial. ”What’s been helpful for me has been learning who I am again. My identity was ripped away from me, and I had to relearn who Christa Hayburn was.”

She has also found meditation, exercise, and spending time outdoors to be helpful. “I’ve learned to treat myself with more self love than I have ever done in my life. I make sure to do things with my family, go out in nature, cook, spend time with my pets, spend time with friends—just be a normal human.”

Christa’s advice for other survivors is to not be afraid of relying on a support system of people you trust during the healing process. For Christa, her husband has been her greatest advocate. “He’s walked through this journey with me—through some ugly points. We are still together, and he is my biggest supporter,” says Christa. “I know what it’s like to have that support from someone, and that’s why it’s so important for me to give that support to others. If they can feel heard, then they’ll pass it on. It’s a ripple effect of love, compassion, and empathy.”

Christa finds strength, purpose, and healing in being an advocate for other survivors. “I never wanted to be a victim of my circumstances. I had to be an advocate for others and through that, for myself.” Christa recently worked with city officials to create a bill that would require all city workers to regularly receive sexual harassment training. “Being part of that was wonderful.”

Christa now works at a crisis center for sexual assault survivors where she finds fulfillment and continued healing through helping others and sharing her story. “I’m so glad I can be there for survivors. I will continue to advocate for change until true change takes place across the country. People in these institutions have to take sexual assault seriously and be more supportive of those who come forward.”

“Having the opportunity to share this is truly a gift—no one talks about it,” Christa says in regards to speaking about sexual assault within police departments. “But this is something we desperately need to talk about so that we can offer support and create true change in these communities.”

Christa’s hope for the future of sexual violence is that no one will have to fear coming forward to share their story. “No healing can be done when you’re afraid of losing everything from under you.”

“I’ve learned to step outside of my experience and realize that I have the ultimate control over my story and what the ending to that story looks like. The moment I realized that, I got my power back.”

Men & Womens Health

“#SoSC” Prompt for Week is *Blue

 

The first thing I see and also comes to mind is the pool outside my living room. It’s beautiful and inviting, refreshing and even great fun at times. It’s been so hot in Texas that swimming is out of the question unless you’re out at 4:00 A.M. which I am not.

Join us for the fun and sharing good media stories. 

For more on the Stream of Consciousness Saturday, visit Linda Hill’s blog. Here’s the link:https://lindaghill.com

Here are the rules for SoCS:

  1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
  2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.
  3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The’,” or simply a single word to get your started.
  4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours. Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.
  5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.
  6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!
  7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.
  8. Have fun!

 

Men & Womens Health

Where Oh Where Did My ReBlog Button GO?

Why does the REBLOG button not work so often? How can it work for months and then decide not to work for a day or even a week?

I’m venting as usual, the REBLOG button matters to me because I have a community Blog and the only way we upload new content is through REBLOGGING.

Thanks for allowing me to vent. Contacting the engineers do no good. Most times they know of the problem but have no solution to offer, OR I get the answer it has to do with Safari. There are millions of Mac OS users so using the Safari answer gets a good laugh. Why in the hell can’t WordPress keep a simple function working?

Melinda

Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Camila Cabello just shared the simple self-help technique she uses to overcome her anxiety

People

Posted byChristobel Hastings

Published16 days ago

Camila Cabello is no stranger to speaking out about her mental healthstruggles, and in a bid to raise awareness of the effects of anxiety, the singer shared the self-help technique she turns to when she’s feeling overwhelmed by the chaos of everyday life.

In an age when our perception of the world is so often viewed through a heavily filtered lens, it can be tough to keep a cultivate a positive self-image. But despite the heavily-filtered images and aspirational messages we consume on our social media feeds, more and more celebrities are taking steps to break through the illusion of perfection and present a more nuanced reality.

One star leading the way when it comes to disrupting the narrative is Camila Cabello. The singer is no stranger to speaking out about her struggles with mental health, and in a candid note to her followers last month, she opened up about her experiences with anxiety, and the ways she’s learned to cope with being “incredibly nervous” and “socially anxious.”

This time around the Señorita singer is continuing her mental health conversation by sharing the coping mechanism she turns to when she’s feeling overwhelmed: breathing exercises.

Taking to Instagram, the singer posted a long note to her followers acknowledging that she has the power to influence positive change in people’s lives through her social media platform, even if in “small ways.”

“To anyone on here who is struggling, which we all do sometimes cause we’re human!!! I super recommend taking five minutes out of your day to just breathe,” Cabello began, alongside a photo of herself relaxing in a bar.

The singer went on to explain that although she never used to pay attention to the practice of meditation, and in particular the concept “noticing your breath”, the self-help technique has improved the quality of her life since she started taking time out of the day for herself. 

“I’ve been doing this lately and it’s helped me so much, I didn’t understand meditation before, or the concept of just noticing your breath, but I’ve been doing it the past few months and I can feel the quality of my life improving,” she explained.

“I used to live so much in my head, constantly trapped in my overthinking and being in my head as opposed to the present moment – and lately just going back to my breath and focusing on it puts me back in my body and back in the present and helps me so much.

Cabello, who is set to perform Señorita with Shawn Mendes for the first time at the MTV VMAs tomorrow night, then advised taking up a breathing exercise “whenever you feel yourself getting overwhelmed” in your day-to-day life, taking time to concentrate on the sensation. 

“Inhale for five seconds through your nose, and exhale for five seconds through your mouth – and super focus on your breath and how it feels coming in and out of your nostrils. Do it three times a day and whenever you feel yourself getting overwhelmed,” she continued.

The singer empathised with her followers and acknowledged that learning how to cope with life could frequently be “intense and hard”, which is why she wanted to share the mental health coping mechanism.

I think some tools are really life changing and help you know how to do that better, so I just thought i’d share something that’s really helped me,” the singer added.

Cabello’s honesty reminds us that everyone faces their own challenges in life, even the celebrities whose seemingly perfect lives we admire on our feeds. But by embracing an open conversation around mental health, we can break down shame and stigma, and find ways to lead a more authentic life. 

Image: Getty

Men & Womens Health

Same-Sex Sexual Behavior Partially Influenced by Genetics

August 29, 2019 By 23andMe under 23andMe Research

A new genome-wide association study (GWAS) involving more than 490,000 individuals, including 75,000 23andMe customers who consented to research, offers an intriguing glimpse into the complexity of sexual behavior. While the study found thousands of genetic variants with very, very small affects on same-sex sexual behavior, it did not find any “gay gene,” nor did the researchers expect to. 

The study, “Large-scale GWAS reveals insights into the genetic architecture of same-sex sexual behavior,” reveals some differences in the genetics of same-sex sexual behavior between men and women, for instance. It also shows that human sexuality is more nuanced than many believe. Rather, like personality and other complex human traits, a mix of genetic and environmental factors influences sexual behavior. 

The researchers — in the United States, the Netherlands, the United Kingdom and Australia, —  did not find any patterns among genetic variants that could be used to meaningfully predict or identify a person’s sexual orientation or behavior. 

“[M]any loci with individually small effects…additively contribute to individual differences in predisposition to same-sex sexual behavior,” they write, describing genetic patterns consistent with many personality, behavioral, and physical traits. 

23andMe is just one of the many institutions involved in this international collaboration, which includes scientists of different disciplines and areas of expertise from some of the world’s top academic and research bodies.

Because it’s a controversial topic, funding has historically been limited and recruitment of participants was difficult — many of the studies that had been done in this area were underpowered and under resourced.

23andMe — with its crowdsourced research platform that allowed anonymous, de-identified participation — was uniquely positioned to engage in this type of study. And, as a company, we are committed to representing the full diversity of the human population, and sexual behavior is just one component of that. Tags: Featuredsexual behaviorsexual orientation

Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Let’s Talk About Pain

Dear pain warriors, 
At U.S. Pain Foundation, we deeply believe in the power of sharing patient stories. Talking about our experiences with pain helps us to educate others, to create change, and to offer hope. That’s why our theme for Pain Awareness Month 2019, which begins Sunday, is #LetsTalkAboutPain.
I first got involved in patient advocacy by writing a book about my experiences with complex regional pain syndrome. It enabled me to process my personal journey, take control of my story, and help create awareness for those like me. 
I hope speaking up about pain this September can do the same for you. 
This year, we have dozens of opportunities for you to help bring pain to the forefront of public conversations, ranging from our daily storyathon to social media giveaways to weekly events.
All of these activities are presented in collaboration with our generous sponsor, Thrive Tape, the creator of an innovative, far-infrared kinesiology tape for all types of musculoskeletal conditions and injuries. (We encourage you to check them out! Use the code USPAIN for a discount.)
How you can participate
We have something for everyone! Most activities are online, which means you can take part from the comfort of your home. 
Storyathon. Each day in September, U.S. Pain will be sharing a video story of a real person living with pain. These individuals–from all walks of life–bravely submitted their personal stories in August to help create awareness. To watch the videos, follow us on Facebook and Twitter. Missed the video storyathon deadline? Share your written story.

Educational events.Events include: “Talking publicly about pain: A Q&A with Ed Coghlan of National Pain Report,” on Sept. 5 at 1 pm EST, “Expression and movement: A dance class for chronic pain,” on Sept. 10 at 8 pm EST, “Becoming Incurable: A Q&A with Film Director Victoria Suan” on Sept. 17 at 1 pm EST, and more. Get details and register.

Social media challenge & giveaways.Each day, we’ll be posting a daily task across our social media channels. On certain days, participation will enter you to win awesome prizes, including: kinesio tape from our presenting sponsor, Thrive Tape; pain relief devices from QuellOska; and Enso; and a copy of the book, “Taming Chronic Pain.” Learn more.

Profile frame. Social media is an easy tool for generating awareness. For a quick way to call attention to pain, customize your Facebook or Twitter profile picture with our Pain Awareness Month frame, featuring this year’s campaign theme, #LetsTalkAboutPain. Keep it up throughout the month of September–or even beyond–and encourage others to do the same.

Resources & materials toolkit. U.S. Pain has launched a toolkit of downloadable and/or printable materials–including a chronic pain infographic, Pain Awareness Month flyers, social media graphics, sample social media posts, and more–to help you spread the word about chronic pain in your local community and online. Access the toolkit here.
 Public awareness efforts. U.S. Pain volunteers have been busy obtaining government proclamations, getting buildings and landmarks to light up in blue on Sept. 13, having locations decorated in blue, organizing wear blue days on Sept. 27, and more. To see these efforts in action, subscribe to our newsletter or follow us on FacebookTwitter, and Instagram.

The above is just a sampling of opportunities to engage. To learn more about all Pain Awareness Month 2019 activities, visit our website.Let’s start talking!
Remember: pain may be silent. But we don’t have to be.
Thank you for working with us to create change for our community. If you have any questions about getting involved, please email us!

Sincerely,
Nicole HemmenwayInterim CEOU.S. Pain Foundation
Speak up today!