Category: Moving Forward

Survivors Blog Here Welcomes Heidi Sullivan from Braving Mental Illness
Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward · Survivor

Survivors Blog Here Welcomes Heidi Sullivan from Braving Mental Illness

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Survivors Blog Here is thrilled to announce Heidi Sullivan is our newest Contributor. Heidi is inspirational and committed to helping people with Mental Health challenges. Please stop by to meet Heidi and check out her personal site http://www.bravingmentalillness.com

I took the below information from Heidi’s ”About Me”page. She is so committed to share, help and answer questions. She is committed and I want you to see how she describes herself.

My life purpose is to inspire hope, courage, and strength within others one life at a time. The realization that my mind had taken over more than my body, but my spirit, was the day I took back my life. It’s one thing to experience pain and suffering on a surface level, it’s an entirely different experience when you look in the mirror and your spirit is lifeless. That’s when you’ve had enough. My life purpose is to inspire hope, courage, and strength within others one life at a time. I hope in sharing my story and listening to yours, we can encourage one another. One of my favorite quotes is, “I am only held back by the limits set within my mind.” Be well!

http://www.facebook.com/Heidi.Sullivan.526        www.twitter.com/HeidiInyama.com

Welcome, it’s only up from here.

M

I Am a Kid and Something Happened
Moving Forward

I Am a Kid and Something Happened

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Presented by RAINN

I Am a Kid and Something Happened

Tell Someone. If somebody touches you in a way you don’t like or touches an area covered by a bathing suit, tell someone you trust.

Say no. If somebody wants to hug you, kiss you, or touch your body, you can always tell them no. It’s not OK for ANYONE to touch you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable — even if they are older or in charge, like your teacher. You can always say no to any touch that makes you feel unsafe.

Some secrets are OK to share. You don’t have to keep secrets about spending time with someone or getting gifts from them. If someone makes you scared or upset, it’s OK to tell a grown-up you trust.

Pictures are private. If someone takes a picture of you, and you don’t want them to, that is not OK! If they want to take a picture of your private parts, that is not OK either! You can tell a grown-up you trust right away.

It’s OK if you are scared. It’s normal to feel scared about telling and getting in trouble. That’s OK. You are really brave to tell. Keep telling until someone helps you.

RAINN: Stalking Awareness Month
Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward

RAINN: Stalking Awareness Month

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Stalking

What is stalking?

“Stalking is a pattern of repeated and unwanted attention, harassment, contact, or any other course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to feel fear,” according to the Department of Justice. Similar to crimes of sexual violence, stalking is about power and control.

Stalking laws and definitions differ from state to state. You can read more about your state’s laws by visiting the Stalking Resource Center. Stalking behavior can take many forms including:

  • Making threats against someone, or that person’s family or friends
  • Non-consensual communication, such as repeated phone calls, emails, text messages, and unwanted gifts
  • Repeated physical or visual closeness, like waiting for an someone to arrive at certain locations, following someone, or watching someone from a distance
  • Any other behavior used to contact, harass, track, or threaten someone

What is “the use of technology to stalk”?

One of the ways perpetrators stalk victims is through the use of technology. You may have heard the term cyberstalking to refer to these types of interactions. “Use of technology to stalk” is a broad term that is used to cover all forms stalking that rely on technology.

Some uses of technology to stalk include:

  • Persistently sending unwanted communication through the internet, such as spamming someone’s email inbox or social media platform
  • Posting threatening or personal information about someone on public internet forums
  • Video-voyeurism, or installing video cameras that give the stalker access to someone’s personal life
  • Using GPS or other software tracking systems to monitor someone without their knowledge or consent
  • Using someone’s computer and/or spyware to track their computer activity

​As technology and digital platforms continue to grow, so do the chances that someone could interact with you in an unwanted, sexual manner. Not all of these behaviors are considered stalking, but they can be violating and make you feel uncomfortable. Learn more about the different ways people can use technology to hurt others.

What are some common reactions to being stalked?

The DOJ uses “fear” to define the experience of being stalked, but there are other reactions that are just as important to consider. You might feel anxious, nervous, isolated, become stressed, or develop signs of depression.

What should I do if I’m being stalked?

If you think you are being stalked, please know you are right to be concerned. Stalking may escalate in behavior. Consider the following tips to increase your safety and effectively report the crime.

  • Try to avoid the person stalking you. This can be difficult at times, especially if the person stalking you is close to you or your family.
  • If you are being stalked through communication technology, like email or text messaging, make it clear that you wish to stop contact. Once you’ve made it clear, do not respond to further communication.
  • Keep any evidence received from the stalker such as text messages, voicemails, letters, packages, emails, etc., but do not respond. You can do this by taking screenshots of conversations or even printing out email exchanges.
  • Inform family, friends, supervisors, and co-workers of the situation.
  • If you have children, create a code word that lets them know they need to leave the house or call the police.
  • Consider reporting the stalking to local law enforcement.
  • Keeping an accurate journal or log of all incidents connected to the stalking.
  • Become familiar with computer safety and ways to stay safe online.

To learn more about stalking and safety planning visit the Stalking Resource Center.

To speak with someone who is trained to help, call the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.HOPE (4673) or chat online at online.rainn.org.

Mental Health Resources
Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward · Survivor

Mental Health Resources

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Mental Health Resources

Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance

International Bipolar Foundation

Mental Health America

MentalHealth.gov

National Alliance on Mental Illness

National Institute of Mental Health

National Institutes of Health

Addiction Resources
Moving Forward

Addiction Resources

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I’ve added these resources to my page, I hope someone can benefit from the information.  M

Moving Forward

Dissociative Identity Disorder: Isolation and the Fear of Rejection

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Robert,
Thank you for sharing the complex details of the mental illness Dissociative Identity Disorder. This helps start a dialogue and I hope more understand. M

Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward · Survivor

Bring Change To Mind

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My daughter lost her battle with mental illness on March 19, 2013. She had just turned 23 years old. She was studying for the MCAT, and planned to cure cancer. She was curious and gentle and loving. She was too young.

The pain of losing Emily is indescribable. And, I truly did not know how I would ever be able to move forward. In some ways, I do not think that I ever will be able to really move on from it. But, I knew that I had to try.

Two weeks after we buried Emily, my sister saw one of Bring Change to Mind’s PSAs on television and told me that I needed to check out the organization. A month after my first conversation with the Executive Director, I joined the BC2M Board of Directors. After weeks of seemingly insurmountable heartache, I finally had a place to channel all of my emotions into something that felt productive. I had an opportunity to work with an organization dedicated to erasing the deadly stigma that surrounds mental illness. I had a chance to try and prevent another parent from going through what I had experienced.

After Emily passed away, it felt as though I had become a member a club that I never wanted to join – a club for people who have lost a loved one to mental illness. No one wants to be a part of this club. And, I think that I speak for all of us who are united by loss when I say that we do not want any more members. We do not want anyone else to have to go through the unspeakable pain that is burying someone that you love.

So, we need to use our common understanding of this daunting topic to speak up and to speak out about mental health. We have a chance to gather our voices to create change. We need to share our stories in the ways that feel sustainable to us, and to honor the beautiful lives led by those that we have lost. We have to create safe opportunities for others to open up about their experiences of living with mental illness – both their successes and their hardships. We have to connect with those who are too scared to seek help and who are unsure about what exactly they may be going through. We need to support impactful programs, such as BC2M’s Student Movement and PSAs, that are elevating the mental health conversation to unprecedented levels. Our High School and Undergrad Programs are creating peer-led initiatives that empower students to create dialogue and connection on their own campuses. Our PSAs are reaching billions of people with our message that it is time to talk about mental health and to eradicate stigma once and for all.

We all have an opportunity, and we all have a role to play. We all have the chance to bring change to mind.
David Watson speaking about why his company, GLOWBIOTICS, donates 1% of sales to Bring Change to Mind in memory of his daughter, Emily.
I hope that you will be able to join me in giving to Bring Change to Mind this year to support their life-saving work to raise mental health awareness. Every bit helps more than you could know so whether you are donating $5, $50,000, or your time and commitment to this mission – thank you from the very bottom of my heart. I will never know if I could have saved Emily, but I do know that the work that we are all doing to normalize the conversation around mental health is changing the lives of so many others. And, for that, I am eternally grateful.
Donate

From my family to you and yours, please know that I am wishing you a safe, warm, and stigma-free holiday season.

All my very best,
David Watson
BC2M Board Member & Chair Emeritus
GLOWBIOTICS Co-Founder
Moving Forward

The memory of fire

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Reblogged from my friend Candace at The Feathered Sleep. Her writing is addictive, stop by her site to look around. You’re bound to find plenty to read. M

TheFeatheredSleep's avatarTheFeatheredSleep

Most habits

Are learned lazily

Incorporated into being, before aware

Of what it means to be.

A habit is a slothful fellow

Whispering in our ears;

You’ve done it before

Come sit by the fire

And watch others rush at life

Put your aching bones close to the warmth

Feel the security of what you’ve gone and done

So many times

And if you were asked

To break out of your stupor

Throw water on the fireplace, dousing heat

And with no preparation

Launch into a violent rain storm

Obscuring your direction

Lashing your sides with chill

Would you follow?

Thrill seekers maybe

The very young, the chronically overlooked

That girl with braces who wanted to be the busty blonde

Maybe they’d fall like extinguished stars

Into the storm

And from their yearning to matter, to win

They’d keep going long after the memory of fire was lost

Fighting without…

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Moving Forward

stuck

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From my friend Marcus at Survivors Blog Here. Thanks Marcus. M

Marcus's avatarsurvivor road

not so sure if i’m “stuck” as much as not at a place where i want to move on.  Mitchel was one of the great memories.  tragic ending maybe, but still so much good.

why is there so much pain?

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Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward · Survivor

What It All Means

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This video floored me, it’s real for me, he spoke works to come from my mouth, Jim was able to show the guts, inside, raw communication and how struggles are battled. I ran across this last week, I don’t know who to give credit to. I’ve watched over and over and each time I see one of my dark times, suicidal journeys and crawling back from hell.

I hope you will watch and reblog on. Everyone can learn from the inside look of depression.  M

Lyme Update #20: *Moving Forward*
Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward

Lyme Update #20: *Moving Forward*

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I fired my Lyme Literate Doctor

The last straw!

My Lyme PA prescribed a medication which interacted with a psych medication. Making me Psychotic, pure bat crazy. Scared of myself. Walking in circles non-stop until exhausted. It took days for the medication to clear my system and bring me back to earth. It was life changing. I said horrible things to my husband I can’t back.  All said in rage, I was a Monster.

The PA replied by saying the two drugs are in different categories and would not interact that way. I don’t believe my chart what checked against new prescription for interactions. Who knows. I didn’t do my standard process of checking the FDA site. My normal practice is to read the FDA history and related interactions before starting a medication.

Next Update will discuss how I’m building a local Lyme team, the illnesses, ailments, permanent changes I have and regression. Some topics listed below.

Building local Medical team

Early on set Dementia

Cognitive challenges

Neuropathy

Severe headaches

Uncontrollable shaking 

Antibiotics, skin sensitivity 

Immune System impacted indefinitely  

 

Moving Forward

Easy Christmas Wreath Suitable for the Chronically Ill

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Thanks for sharing the great tips for holidays or any occasion. I’m reflagging to my site. Hope you still have a small on. Do you need any WP Admin help from me, it can get quite frustrating. I’m here to help you. Melinda

Insights from the Hotline Room: Planning for Holiday Gatherings
Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward · Survivor

Insights from the Hotline Room: Planning for Holiday Gatherings

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As the year winds down, folks across the country are headed home for the holidays to spend time with family and friends. While this is a time of celebration for many, it also presents challenges for some survivors of sexual abuse.

Family and friends gather for a holiday meal, respecting each other's boundaries.

More often than not, the perpetrator of sexual violence is someone the victim knows. This is especially true for those who experience sexual abuse as a child: 93 percent of children know the perpetrator, and 34 percent are abused by a family member. For these survivors, holiday gatherings can mean facing painful memories, feelings of anxiety, or a chance of repeated harm.

During the holiday season, RAINN support specialists for the National Sexual Assault Hotline anticipate helping survivors who are going through a tough time at home or during family gatherings. Here, they share some strategies to help survivors feel safe.

  1. Identify alternative housing plans. Survivors who have flexible schedules during the holidays can stay in different places to avoid being in the family home or location where the abuse occurred.
  • Consider staying with a friend or non-offending family member.
  • Plan a mini-vacation or side trip during the time you would be asked to stay with family.
  • Offer to join for family gatherings, but stay in an offsite location, like a motel or hostel (if finances allow). If you are concerned about ongoing safety, keep this location private from the perpetrator.
  1. Try to avoid close quarters. For many survivors, family pressures or traditions do not permit them to stay outside the family home. In this situation, survivors can brainstorm ways to avoid the perpetrator during gatherings.
  • Make plans that involve leaving the home for an extended period of time, such as volunteering, catching up with old friends, or offering to run errands for the household.
  • Think of possible excuses, such as having conflicting plans or needing rest, for not attending events where the offender will be present.
  • If it makes you feel safer, stick to common areas and public places within the home or building, such as a living room or kitchen, and try to avoid secluded areas.
  • Avoid talking to, sitting near, or standing around the person who hurt you. It’s okay to draw boundaries, even if makes other family members uncomfortable.
  1. Reach out to a neutral party. Survivors may feel isolated because of patterns of not being believed, fear of disclosing, or concerns about creating family tensions or division. Sometimes, it can be easier to talk to a neutral third-party that can offer support.
  • Reach out to the National Sexual Assault Hotline by phone (800.656.4673) to be connected with a local sexual assault service provider, or chat online with someone who is trained to help.
  • Download safety planning or meditation apps for a smartphone or tablet to help with stressful times.
  • Read through recovery tips from RAINN, like Self-Care After Trauma and Tips for Survivors on Consuming Media.
  • If you are in imminent danger, call 911.

4. Make a plan. Mapping out a game plan for family gatherings—in advance—can help survivors feel safe, comfortable, and prepared.

  • Think through logistics. Does this plan require a car or other transportation? Will you need to arrive or depart the family gathering at a certain time?
  • Consider how to talk to family if tensions arise. Not everyone is ready or able to disclose what happened—and that’s OK. Make a plan for how to answer tough questions or diffuse a tense situation.

If your safety plan falls through, or if you experience harm, know that you have done nothing wrong. You deserve support. The National Sexual Assault Hotline is free, confidential, and available 24/7: 800.656.HOPE (4673) and online.rainn.org

Moving Forward

Diana Nyad’s Story

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Thank you for sharing her story, she’s a strong woman and can offer support to all of us. M

grace to survive's avatarPatricia J Grace

Rebel Recovery shared this article from the New York Times written by Diana Nyad an athlete and swimmer. 

Diana Nyad: My Life After Sexual Assault

By DIANA NYAD 

 
Diana Nyad at 61, during training for a swim from Key West, Fla., to Cuba. Jeffery Salter/Redux

Here I was, a strong-willed young athlete. There he was, a charismatic pillar of the community. But I’m the one who, all these many years later, at the age of 68, no matter how happy and together I may be, continues to deal with the rage and the shame that comes with being silenced.

My particular case mirrors countless others. I was 14. A naïve 14, in 1964. I don’t think I could have given you a definition of intercourse.

My swimming coach was in many ways the father I had always yearned for. I met him when I was 10, and…

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RAINN: Danyol’s Story
Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward

RAINN: Danyol’s Story

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RAPE, ABUSE, INCEST NATIONAL NETWORK

“I just want people to know that they don’t have to be afraid of their truth. Your truth is important, your truth is needed.” 

Danyol Jaye was sexually abused and raped repeatedly by his older cousin between the ages of 7 and 10. The cousin enabled multiple perpetrator sexual assault when he locked Danyol in a dark closet and had his friends take turns entering the closet to sexually assault him.

Danyol first disclosed the abuse at age 15 to a close neighbor who was a friend of his mother’s. Not ready to share his story with his family, Danyol trusted the neighbor with the information. However, she immediately told his mother, who confronted him.

“It just felt like another violation. I felt in that moment that not only did my cousin violate me and take something from me, but now a person I trusted with this information also violated me and stole another choice from me. That feeling of violation was as hard as it was to endure the actual trauma.”

Danyol underwent a retraumatization from the violation of losing control of his story, and from his family’s reaction to it. Many of his family members questioned why he waited to speak about the abuse, and openly expressed their disbelief in his story. “There was so much conversation about me without me, but no one ever had a conversation with me.”

Because of the abuse, Danyol has suffered from body image issues, depression, and trust issues. Certain triggers related to the abuse—such as dark rooms—also cause him anxiety.

Meet Danyol

5 words that describe me:

  • Passionate
  • Determined
  • Loving
  • Giving
  • Strong

On listening to survivors:

“There was so much conversation about me without me, but no one ever had a conversation with me about how I was doing, about what happened to me.”

On telling his story:

“I felt in that moment that not only did my cousin violate me and take something from me, but now a person I trusted with this information also violated me and stole another choice from me.”

Danyol’s healing process began when his high school counselor encouraged him to attend student group therapy sessions, where he was able to open up about his story and receive support from his peers.

Other important aspects of Danyol’s healing process have been the support of his best friend of 15 years, connection to his faith, and artistic expression. Danyol created a one-man dramatic stage play about abuse and self-discovery. He wanted to tell his story in his own way and to reclaim the power of sharing what happened to him with his family and friends.

“It was very therapeutic. I remember days when I’d be working on the scripts and rehearsing lines—I would break out in tears. It was the first time I really came to terms with it. This happened to me. This is my truth, I am not a liar, I am not making it up.”

Danyol advocates for ways in which family and friends can be more supportive when a survivor discloses abuse. He recommends not pressuring survivors into giving detailed informations about their assault. This forces them into reliving the incident and can cause repeated trauma. This pressure to gain information makes the interaction focused on the individual who is asking, rather than on the survivor. Danyol instead suggests listening to the survivor, letting them share aspects of their story when they’re ready, and showing your support through believing their story. There are certain obstacles survivors who are men and boys face; learn more about them and find information and resources.

Danyol is currently pursuing a career in the entertainment industry and finishing his autobiography, which he hopes to complete next year. It has been important to Danyol to use his voice to empower other survivors to tell their stories when they’re ready.

“Talking about it really does take back power from the trauma.”

Neil Archbold on Nuddge Mental Health Services
Celebrate Life · Moving Forward

Neil Archbold on Nuddge Mental Health Services

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Hi Grace

Thanks for the offer to include Nuddge on your blog. Most information is on the website but to add:

 – We started Nuddge as everyone in the team has had direct or family experience of depression or anxiety
 – We are all seasoned health and tech professionals
 -We feel social media doesn’t offer the best solution currently. Too much vanity, too much one upmanship and too many unhelpful inputs
 -We want people to feel safe, liberated and supported
 Launches in the UK January 2018

Nuddge is developing a service to help people with and , geared at and and those who them

nuddge.com

  1. Hear Neal’s candid weekly Nuddge story

  2.  Want even more fun, easy ? Check out our Instagram

                   

 London, England
Triple Shot Thursday *Can’t Stop the Feeling*
Celebrate Life · Fun · Men & Womens Health · Moving Forward · Survivor

Triple Shot Thursday *Can’t Stop the Feeling*

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This week has been the best in ages, I’ve made new friends thru lengthy conversations. Identified new blogs to follow and received comments from people I haven’t talk to in a long time. You have made me so happy this week, my heart is filled with joy. Let’s see if the music choices can match the joy in my heart. A special treat from James Arthur who blows me away with this song/message.  M