Domestic Violence Awareness Month-What I’ve Experienced

October 24, 2022 Looking for the Light11 Comments

I’ve lived in the hell of Domestic Violence. Instead of giving you statistics, I want to share some thoughts and experiences. In this post, I also share ideas on how to proactively prepare for the day you leave.

This chart is great to use for teaching tweens/teens and as a reminder for yourself. If children are taught early, you can help them see the warning signs, and help them gently with the words to break off the relationship before it goes any further. Teens can be a handful but early learning will help.

There are resources on the Internet on how to listen to your child if you are worried about them. Talking to a therapist about coping skills and how to teach your children about abusive relationships will help immensely.

Feelings you may encounter

Anger
Confusion
Fear
Explosions
Self-Hatred
Low Self Esteem
Chaos
Running Away
Suffocated
Followed

My world was walking on eggshells, listening to my mother get beat day after day. My stepfather hit her head against the wall as they went down the entire hallway and stopped at my bedroom door. I had to listen to my mother begging for him to stop, it traumatized me.

I was nine years old, my parents were going to bed, and I thought we had made it thru another day. A few minutes later I hear her screaming and them coming down the hall, wincing every time her head hits the wall. They landed in front of my door but across the hall, I could peek out my door and see everything. My stepfather dragged her by the hair, up against a wall, and had a knife to her throat. My mother saw me I could tell she was afraid for her life. I saw a trickle of blood and freaked out. I had fears of him hurting us four children.

Even though my mother and I had a very fractured relationship, you don’t want to see your mother killed. I was panicked, and could not get to the phone to call my grandparents. I gather up the little money I had hidden and took off on my bike. I rode across town to my boyfriend’s house. Long story short, my mother arrived acting nice until we got in the car. She slapped me all the way home. Everything was fine, it was my fault.

If you are in a Domestic Violence relationship and you are planning to leave, there are some steps you can take to make the move less stressful. If you have a family member or friend that would allow you to pack some items and leave them until the night you leave that would not cause alarm at home. If you don’t have anyone to help you directly, hiding essentials in the trunk of your car is possible. The key is to be prepared as possible because once you leave the house, it may take a while before you get your items returned or are able to move back in the house.

You have to get crafty when it comes to money. If you withdraw the money too quickly they will find out. He’s what comes to my mind. You have to plan your escape seriously and it has to be precise or it may escalate. If both of your names are on the credit card or bank try to get your name taken off and get a new account sent to a safe address. Run as fast as you can with what you can! Life will be insane for a while but living in those conditions is inhumane.

Save small amounts of money and hid it from your partner, after you have a small amount of money, take it to your friend’s house for safekeeping. You will need to save money for some time to help you once you leave. I’ve heard of many women being cut off from money, it’s probably one of the leading causes. Many times one partner will be left without money, for who knows how long.

If you have children you will need escape bags for them too. I’m talking like one small suitcase for all. If you have a job it’s easier, in that you can control your future. Once you settle into a shelter, family, or friends, new routines can form. Shop different stores, and do everything to avoid him even if that means driving out of way to pick items up. The last thing you want is a confrontation. This can escalate very quickly and turn into a bad ending.

I’ve talked to many women and men from Domestic Violence homes and leaving is always hard. There are so many fears. Have someone on your side to talk to if you can. The key is planning, where to go, and when to go, you have to plan a couple of days’ clothing if possible because it may be that long before an Officer can go with you and let you in the house. Tell as few people as possible and get a burner phone so he can’t track you.

It may sound far-fetched but many abusers don’t want to lose their partner, they say I love you and how sorry they are, and it will never happen again. LIE! They want to continue to control you and will stop at nothing. I’m not talking about killing you, even though in a worst-case scenario it could happen, what I’m talking about is the hassling, all the time, calling you or your employer, calling your family members, they will work hard to have you back in their life.

I will firmly say the first time you leave is the easiest, if you go back and many do, they will keep an eye on every move you make. Don’t let that stop you from leaving again you have to try a different technique. The saddest is the children involved in the turmoil. Years of therapy helped me deal with my traumatic background.

Please check out my page Organizations That Can Help, the number of resources I have for Domestic Violence is fairly short but there are other resources you may need along the way listed too. There are some great blogs that discuss Domestic Violence, seek them out to learn tips on how to diffuse situations to how to prepare to leave.

I’m proud of you wherever you are in life and pray you are happy and healthy. Please remember I’m talking about what happened in my life. I won’t say I know yours or that I’m an expert, I’m not. Just a 59-year-old recalling traumatic memories. Therapy has saved my life. One thing I know is the less you keep bottled up, the better your mental health will be.

One thing you need is a couple of people to follow and learn from those who have been where you are. You’ll get ideas from following others, not only for learning but also for building your confidence. A blog I read a long time ago went as far as how to protect yourself inside the home if you are trying to get in.

KEEP MOVING FORWARD!

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Blog Tour Interview with Lynda Faye Schmidt Author of The Holding and The Healing

October 22, 2022September 13, 2025 Looking for the Light2 Comments

I’m thrilled to introduce Lynda Faye Schmidt author of The Holding and The Healing along with a companion Journal. She is kicking off her blog tour, on October 21-25th and I’m supporting her with my interview. Lynda Faye Schmidt is a storyteller who writes from the heart. Her novels are emotionally impacting and character-driven.

Before becoming a writer, Lynda earned a Bachelor of Education. She taught in a variety of settings, sharing her love of reading, writing and creating. After her move to the Middle East in 2015, Lynda kicked off her writing career with her blog, Musings of an emotional creature. She was also a contributor for DQ Living magazine. <img id="

Here’s a blurb about The Holding

The Holding is a prequel to The Healing. Based on true events, the story takes us back to the beginning, where Cate Henderson is born in a small prairie town in Canada. Six weeks premature, baby Cate is tiny, but feisty. Even as an infant, Cate’s radiant smile lights up a room. But the heart of this novel is the relationship that unfolds between Cate and her father, William. An emotional read, The Holding delves into both harsh realities and healing journeys. From childhood abuse and bullying to the power of love to transform; it is a story of resilience, a father’s devotion, and an unbreakable bond between father and daughter that will have the reader engaged right up to the last scene.

Look for a couple of reviews at the end of our interview.

Thank you Lynda for taking the time to talk with me today. Why don’t we jump right in?

Can you give us a snapshot of your background beyond the brief description?

Absolutely! I was born in a small prairie town in western Canada in the mid-sixties. I lived with my parents and older brother in a succession of small towns until a traumatic event had us move to Calgary, Alberta in 1980. Uprooted, uncertain, and rebellious, I got pregnant at the age of sixteen and my life took off on a whole new direction. With the support of my parents, as well as a stack of student loans and grants, I earned my Bachelor of Education at the university of Calgary in 1988. I married in 1989 and had two more children. I wasn’t into the marriage long before I realized my husband had serious mental health challenges. I did my best to support him and to follow through with my commitment, but things continued to break down. I finally found the courage to leave after all three of my children were done high school, more than twenty-five years later. I packed up everything I could fit into my car and embarked on a new life adventure on Vancouver Island. I delved into healing, and not long after, I met my soulmate, David. We married in 2014 and together we adopted his step-daughter. In 2015, David found work in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, and we moved to the Middle East. We lived there for seven years before choosing to become expats once again, and moved to Panama in August, 2022.

How did your time in the Middle East impact your writing?

The move was huge in creating space and opportunity for my writing career to manifest. My husband’s work schedule didn’t work well with the school calendar, so continuing my career as a teacher didn’t feel like a good option. I’d always dreamed of being a writer and besides keeping a daily journal, had written many poems and short stories as a hobby throughout the busy years of working as a teacher and raising a family. Not long after the move I decided to start a blog, and created Musings of an Emotional Creature. A chance acquaintance led to an opportunity for me to write articles for the local Diplomatic Quarter magazine. I uncovered the five pages of inspiration for a novel I’d scribbled out back in 2012, and decided it was time to write the story. A chance discussion on the local shopping bus had me reaching out to Anne O’Connell of OC Publishing, and my first novel was launched in partnership with her in April 2021.

How does the time spent in the Middle East impact your writing?

How did you take the leap from Teacher to Author?

I think I answer that in the previous question, but I’ll add that it was, and still is, a huge leap of courage and faith. It isn’t an easy industry and I’ve had to learn all kinds of things I never anticipated in the fields of marketing and social media, but I love learning new things and I love writing so all it’s all good.

What led you to write two books and a companion Journal?

After I published my first novel, The Healing, I had a few readers interested in the back story that was only hinted at. They wanted to know about what kept Cate in an unhealthy relationship for so long as well as details about what created her resilience. I had a dusty old manuscript I’d written after my father passed away in 2000 and it became the bones that transformed into my second novel as prequel to the first, The Holding. I received feedback from many reviewers and interviewers who were intrigued by Cate’s journaling practice, which is conveyed in-depth in both novels, and that became my inspiration for the Companion Journal.

How are readers to approach the Journal?

I invite readers to approach the journal in whatever method works for them as unique individuals. My hope is that it will ignite their curiosity and that will in turn expand their self- awareness. I would be delighted if, after working through the journal, readers embraced the idea of some form of regular journaling practice, to continue their journey of self-reflection and growth and expand their consciousness as human beings.

How long did the writing process take?

For me, the writing process is so dynamic, it’s difficult to contain with a timeline. I’m forever jotting down ideas in my journals and on random scraps of paper. With each new book manifested into reality, my own writing practice evolves. When writing The Healing, I wasn’t as committed to a daily writing schedule, so it took the longest. I would estimate each project took around a year to get the raw manuscript to light and then another year for editing and design.

Writers are often avid readers. What type of books do you read for pleasure?

Yes, absolutely, I’m an avid reader, although these days I seem to have less time for the pleasure of leisure reading, I do consider reading an important part of developing my skill as a writer. I read from many genres and my choices have varied greatly over the years. Currently, I’m drawn to novels based on real life, historical fiction, and memoirs. I also appreciate both novels and non-fiction on themes of spirituality, purpose, creativity, and living with intention.

What are some leisure activities you enjoy?

I’m a devout yogi and you can find me on my mat most days of the week. Sometimes I only manage to squeeze in a fifteen-minute meditation and breath-work session. On others, I go for it and move my body through an hour and half of postures that integrate balance, strength, and flexibility. Besides reading, I enjoy watching movies and hosting dinner parties. I love to experiment with ingredients to prepare savory dishes and sweet desserts. Recently I’ve been adding in my love of wine to explore food and wine pairings. Travel is fascinating for me, as I value learning about other cultures and experiences. My husband is an avid gym-enthusiast, so I tie up my trainers to join him in our home gym for solid work-outs on the treadmill and lifting weights too. Now that we’ve moved to Panama, I’m relishing the myriad of natural spaces to explore, including beaches, jungle-forests, and mountain ranges, but I’m not a hard-core hiker by any means. Animated conversations with friends, live music at local establishments, and connecting with people I love brings me a sense of belonging and joy.

How do you want fans to contact you?

I would love to hear from fans in whatever format resonates best with them. On my website, www.lyndafayeschmidt.com, I have a stay in touch form to sign up for emails and submit questions. I also have an author page on Face Book and LinkedIn which I check daily for notifications. I have a YouTube channel where viewers can leave comments. I’m on Goodreads, and fans can follow, review and comment on that platform as well.

It was such a pleasure to talk with Lynda today and to support her Blog Tour. Check out the great reviews.

Here are three reviews, a snippet of those available.

“The Holding took me on an emotional journey. I could relate to Cate’s challenges and rallied with her as she found the inner strength to endure life’s tribulations.”

— Michelle Jones

“Had me captured from the first page to the last.”

— Linda Smith

“Plot-wise, The Healing is an immensely entertaining, feel-good novel…the storyline truly waxes in emotions… If you are charmed by stories like Eat, Pray, Love, The Healing is the book for you.”

— Vincent Dublado, reviewer for Readers’ Favorite <img id="” class=”Apple-web-attachment Singleton” style=”font-style:normal;font-variant-caps:normal;font-weight:400;letter-spacing:normal;orphans:auto;text-align:start;text-indent:0;text-transform:none;white-space:normal;widows:auto;word-spacing:0;-webkit-text-size-adjust:auto;text-decoration:none;color:#000000;font-family:Optima-Regular;font-size:18px;opacity:1;”>Thank you Linda for sharing your time with me, you have had such an interesting life.

Melinda

Looking for the Light

Celebrate Life · Fun · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Fun Facts

October 22, 2022 Looking for the Light8 Comments

Hi, thanks for stopping by today. I love hearing your comments each week. We learn some interesting things, don’t we?

The word “emoji” comes from the Japanese words “e” and “moji,” which mean “picture” and “character.”

Grapes are toxic to cats and dogs – even in small amounts.

The Louvre in Paris is so large that it would take 100 days to look at each piece.

In the 18^th Century, Smallpox scars would get you a job.

In 1913 you could legally mail a baby in the US.

The fact about grapes is news to me. I fed my dog Sasha grapes and it didn’t kill her. I don’t suggest you try.

Enjoy!

Melinda

Reference:

https://www.thefactsite.com/top-100-random-funny-facts/

Celebrate Life · Fun · Men & Womens Health

Friday Quote 10/21/2022

October 21, 2022October 21, 2022 Looking for the Light1 Comment

Hey! So glad you stopped by today, I look forward to your comments each week.

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Fun · Men & Womens Health

Oops!

October 20, 2022 Looking for the Light3 Comments

I woke up, the sleeping pills making me drowsy I go for the computer. It’s Friday and I have blogging to do. I ask my husband several hours later if today was Friday, no it is Thursday.

My mind working along the pace of this river, I dropped the ball.

Those who looked today, a big thank you. You’ll see them again tomorrow.

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Things I’m Loving

October 19, 2022 Looking for the Light4 Comments

Here are a few products I’m in love with right now. I hope you find a new product to add to your household or self-care routine. The list may also give you ideas for a surprise for friends, family, or co-workers.

Nature Valley Wafer Bars

Nature Vally Wafer Bars in Peanut Butter Chocolate taste out of this world and have made my weight loss journey easier. My husband also eats them every day, no weight loss journey, they’re that good. They have multiple flavors and at 100 calories per bar, it makes a great breakfast or snack. Your children will love these too!

You can purchase it at Kroger.

Ohio Tea Company

Ohio Tea Company, wow this is a true tea place. If you want it, chances are they will have it in stock. Teas I had not heard of and have bought a few small packs of exotics just to taste. The flavor I’m in love with is the Monks Blend. It’s the perfect drink anytime tea, I’m drinking right now. One page on their site says they have over 400 teas in stock, surely you can find a few blends for you. Makes great gifts!

You can purchase it online at OhioTeaCo.com.

Bach Rescue Pastilles

Bach Rescue Pastilles in Lemon are homeopathic and trusted generations. They have been a lifesaver since my diagnosis of Sjogren’s Syndrome, I have difficulty making saliva and my mouth is always dry. These help to produce saliva and taste great. They are soft round pastilles that come in a yellow round tin and contain 35 pastilles in each tin.

You can purchase it off Amazon.

Stonefire Flat Bread

The flatbreads have made my weight loss journey easy and when you are cramped for the time they’re the perfect match. We create all types of flatbreads for dinner with all types of goodies on them but I also eat them for lunch or dinner. Each flatbread is 100 calories which works for me, I often add peanut butter or honey to one and that fills me up.

You can purchase it at Kroger.

I would like to hear what products you have added to your life lately that you love? Leave me a note in the comment section below.

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

World Osteoporosis Day 20th

October 18, 2022 Looking for the Light1 Comment

Learning about Osteoporosis happened to me at the tender age of 16 years old. Granny had Osteoporosis and participated in a Clinic Trial to see if Citracal helped over a years time. Unfortunately, Granny didn’t get much help from the study except she now knew she had to take calcium every day. This was the late 1970’s and they knew little about how to treat the illness.

Fast forward to today and look at all the knowledge we have and the RX medications we have for treatments. Participating in a respected Clinical Trial could help you or a loved one. At a minimum, it advances our society.

*One important note about Clinical Trails is you need to know exactly who is the company behind the study, pharmaceuticals? higher education? or to gather information? If you don’t have a relationship with the person who asked you to join, have them send you all the brochures about the study including the treatments or medication being evaluated.

I have never had a bad experience while participating in Clinical Trials, which were all Mental Health focused. The last thing you want is a scam.

Let’s talk more about what is Osteoporosis and what its causes are.

Make no bones about it, World Osteoporosis Day on October 20, is the time to learn about osteoporosis. Celebrate good health and educate yourself and others about the value of taking care of your body and protecting your bones and muscles from disabling and life-threatening fractures.

It’s interesting to note that prior to 1994, osteoporosis wasn’t even considered a major disease. But in 1998, two prominent organizations committed to educating the public about osteoporosis, combined to create the International Osteoporosis Foundation.

One of the most important events for WOD is checking bone density. Bones that are less dense are more liable to easily break or fracture at sudden movement or during minor falls. These bone density tests are available on WOD all over the world.

Osteoporosis Progression

Osteoporosis is a disease of the bone that affects the body’s ability to make bones and/or causes bone loss. When this happens, the bones become very fragile and weak resulting in it breaking from a fall and in some serious situations, from just sneezing, coughing, and minor bumps. This condition is quite common, especially amongst older people.

This disease is caused majorly by the lack of calcium and vitamin D in the body. Low calcium consumption leads to the reduction of bone density and bone loss. Being underweight, smoking, lack of exercise, malabsorption [1], aging, and genetics are also causes of bone weakening in the body. A bone density test [2] is conducted to check for osteoporosis. It is the use of an x-ray to check the density of the bones in your spine, wrists, and hips. Osteoporosis is also known as porous bone.

Stage One

The first stage of osteoporosis begins between the age of 30 to 35. However, it may begin earlier in some person’s, ranging from the age of 25 to 30. This first stage is a state of equilibrium and is the first stage in the decline of the bone’s mineral density [3]. This procedure can be called leaching [4].

Stage Two

In this stage, the rate at which the bones in the body are being broken down will be faster than the rate at which the body builds bones. Bone loss then begins to occur at approximately 0.25% per year. This however varies, depending on environmental and genetic factors.

Symptoms of Stages One and Two

If the jaw is losing bones, this can cause the gums to begin to recede. This is a sign of osteoporosis in its early stages.
The fingernails become weak and feeble.
Reduced grip strength.

Stage Three

Through the ages of 45 to 55, the breakdown of bones occurs at a faster rate. In women, this is an effect of menopause, which leads to a reduction in the hormone oestrogen [5] which is significant in ensuring that all body tissues including bone ligaments, muscles, and tendons are in a good state. Women tend to lose up to 10 to 20% of their bone density in the first five years of menopause. Some women even lose up to 30%. For men, the changes in bone density occur between the ages of 60 to 65. This is caused by a decrease in the hormone testosterone.

This stage is usually characterized by an increase in the fragility of the bones. Where a fall, walking into a door, running, and even bending down to pick something off the floor, which are activities that were considered easy in younger years, may now be enough to cause a fracture.

Stage Four

Osteoporosis reaches this stage when there is no intervention or treatment done to the condition of the bones. In this stage, the effects and consequences of bone loss become quite visible. Factors like continual softening of the bones and the accumulation of fragility fractures, in the body, lead to deformity[6]. With this deformity, comes a lot of pain and discomfort. The individual day by day finds it harder to perform normal daily activities like getting into a car, sitting down, climbing stairs, reaching for something above them, etc.

Conclusion

There is no cure for osteoporosis. There are however treatments for it and steps that can be taken to prevent it. Drugs like bisphosphonates, denosumab, and romosozumab are used to treat osteoporosis. There are also hormone-related medications like calcitonin, parathyroid hormones, and selective estrogen receptor modulators (SERMs) which are treatment methods.

Certain lifestyle changes can also go a long way in preventing and maintaining osteoporosis. Including plenty of calcium and vitamin D in your diet is as important as the medications being taken. Physical activity and exercises like walking, hiking, and dancing is also a good way to treat or prevent this condition.

I hope you’ve learned a great deal about how to deal with Osteoporosis.

Melinda

References:

National Today

Entirely Health

Celebrate Life · Fun · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Just Pondering

October 18, 2022October 18, 2022 Looking for the Light8 Comments

When was the last time you did something for the first time?

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Blogger Highlight-Ms. C. Loves

October 17, 2022October 17, 2022 Looking for the LightLeave a comment

Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week I highlight a new blogger, Ms. C. Loves.

Ms. C. Loves

If music be the food of love, play on✨

In my world, where my life is ever so happening yet my memory is ever so fleeting, I have decided to dedicate some time weekly to preserve those precious moments for my future wrinkly self.

So here, I present to you: my valiant attempt to document all the big and small things in life that capture my heart (cheesy, I know!)—enjoy!

Check out her website for great insight.

Melinda

Looking for the Light

Celebrate Life · Fun · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Fun Facts

October 15, 2022 Looking for the Light3 Comments

Hi, thanks for stopping by today. I love hearing your comments each week. We learn some interesting things, don’t we?

There is a sea slug that steals the ability to photosynthesize and live off sunlight from algae.

The common cold comes from camels.

In the sitcom Parks and Recreation, the writers didn’t know that Nick Offerman was a talented saxophone player when they wrote the Duke Silver plotline.

Ketchup was a medicine in the early 1800s.

In 2017 more people were killed from injuries caused by taking a selfie than by shark attacks.

Enjoy!

Melinda

Reference:

https://www.thefactsite.com/top-100-random-funny-facts/

Celebrate Life · Fun · Men & Womens Health

Friday Quote 10/14/2022

October 14, 2022 Looking for the Light3 Comments

Hey! So glad you stopped by today, I look forward to your comments each week.

Melinda

Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

7 Check-Ups You Should Do Every Year

October 14, 2022 Looking for the Light1 Comment

There are many check-ups that are worth carrying out on an annual basis. These check-ups could help to detect problems early and prevent bigger problems later down the line. Just what types of check-ups are worth doing each year? Below are 7 examples.

Dental check-up

Seeing a dentist every year can be important for checking up on your oral health. Dental problems like gingivitis and cavities may be able to be caught early before they turn into something more severe. Treating such problems early won’t just save your teeth, but could save you a lot of money in expensive future dental treatment.

Eye test

Don’t wait until your vision gets blurry to book an eye test. It’s worth booking an annual eye test to see if your vision is still as sharp – many of us can get used to poor vision and may only notice it once it becomes severe, by which point it could be dangerous if you drive. A local optician will be able to carry out your eye test for you and send you reminders of when you need another test.

Blood pressure test

High blood pressure can damage your arteries and heart, and yet may display no symptoms. Things like stress, lack of sleep, poor diet, smoking, and heavy drinking can all cause high blood pressure. It’s worth taking a blood pressure test every year – you can visit a doctor to do this or you can buy a home blood pressure monitor.

Vet check-up

If you have pets, it could also be worth taking them for a check-up at the vet each year. Animals are very good at hiding health problems as a survival instinct, and you may only notice something is wrong once the health problem gets severe. Your vet will be able to schedule an annual check-up – this typically isn’t very expensive and will be covered by pet insurance if you have it.

Car safety inspection

In some states, it’s a legal requirement to get a safety inspection carried out on your vehicle every year. In other states, it’s not mandatory, but still highly recommended. Annual safety inspections are generally quite cheap and can help detect problems early – potentially preventing a breakdown or an accident at a later date.

HVAC service

If you have an HVAC system in your home, it could be important to get this serviced annually. HVAC issues can result in poor air quality, high energy bills and poor heating/cooling effectiveness – an annual service can detect these issues early so that they can be fixed before they become more severe.

Roof Inspection

Finally, it’s worth getting your roof inspected every year – especially if you live in an older home with an older roof. Roofing damage can often get overlooked, but such damage can cause so many problems from rainwater leaks (which could lead to expensive water damage) to heat loss (which could result in more expensive heating bills). By getting a roofing company to inspect your roof each year, you detect problems early.

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

October Writing Prompts Hosted By A Chronic Voice

October 13, 2022 Looking for the Light1 Comment

Every month Sheryl at A Chronic Voice host the writing prompts for those with Chronic Illnesses. Sheryl has been very ill herself and not able to do the prompts in a couple of months. We’re so glad she’s getting better.

The prompts for the month

DISABLING

ENABLING

COMMITTING

COMMUNICATING

REINVENTING

I’ve chosen three this month, Committing, Communications, and Disabling.

Honestly, I’m not committing to much but myself. I can barely walk, stand up, get up from chair or walk up the stairs. I can only sleep for around 1-2 hours on one hip and 1-3 hours on the other. I feel 70 years old, feeling bad because I make noise in pain when I do any of these moves. I also remember granny never expressed her pain. Not even after failing two stories and cruishing both heels and anckles.

I need a break from doctors until next years just to give me a reprieve and not worry about the process of taking me anywhere.

Over-communication is what I’m working on. It’s a fine balance between sharing and over-sharing. He’s been telling me for two weeks I needed my cane. OH NO!!!!!! Not the cane. It is associated to the time I was so sick, could hardly move around without the wheeled walker. I admitted yesterday that I would try and this morning forgot to go in my office to get it. Now that I’m working downstairs, who wants to get up and feel pain then walk up the stairs moving with a guttural voice from the pain. Not me.

These are times relationships can get hard, one thinks they know the other is thinking and it’s not that at all.

My husband keeps telling me to get out my cane. I’m a fall risk and know it, but in the scenario when I fall or out of balance the cane would only get in my way. It was around 2019 when I put my cane away and will not use it in the house, yet. Outside, I’ve been using a hiking stick but will go back to my cane for outings.

I no longer drive or own a car, I’m closed in 99% of the time, and I feel more disabled than I ever.

Have a great month!

Melinda

Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Dental Care for Adults: Why You Shouldn’t Neglect Your Teeth

October 13, 2022 Looking for the Light1 Comment

It’s no secret that taking care of your teeth is essential. Not only does it keep your smile looking great, but it also significantly impacts your overall health. Unfortunately, tooth decay and gum disease are two of the most common chronic conditions in the United States. But despite this, many adults neglect their dental care. Here are some reasons why you should take care of your teeth!

The Importance of Dental Care

Most adults know that they should brush and floss their teeth every day, but many still don’t make dental care a priority. Neglecting your teeth can lead to several problems, including tooth decay and gum disease. Additionally, poor dental hygiene has been linked to other severe health conditions, such as heart disease and stroke. Therefore, it’s essential to take care of your teeth and mouth.

There are many reasons to prioritize dental care. For one, it’s crucial for your overall health. Good oral hygiene can help prevent gum disease, which is associated with an increased risk of heart disease. Additionally, brushing and flossing removes plaque from your teeth, which helps to prevent cavities. Taking care of your teeth can also help you avoid bad breath.

In addition to being good for your health, dental care is also crucial for your appearance. Having healthy teeth and gums can help you feel more confident and attractive. Therefore, if you’re looking to make a good impression, taking care of your teeth is essential.

There are several ways to take care of your teeth and mouth:

It would be best if you brushed your teeth at least twice daily. Be sure to use a toothbrush with soft bristles and toothpaste that contains fluoride.
It would be best if you flossed your teeth every day. Flossing helps remove plaque from between your teeth, which can help prevent cavities.
You should see your dentist regularly for checkups and cleanings.

The Consequences of Neglecting Dental Care

You’re at risk for several problems if you neglect your dental care. For one, you could develop cavities. Cavities are small holes in your teeth that occur when tooth decay is not removed. If left untreated, cavities can lead to pain and infection. Additionally, you could develop gum disease. Gum disease is an inflammation of the gums that can lead to tooth loss.

In addition to cavities and gum disease, neglecting your dental care can lead to bad breath. Bad breath occurs when there are bacteria in your mouth. This bacteria can cause a foul smell. Additionally, if you don’t care for your teeth, you may be at risk for other health problems, such as heart disease and stroke.

When to See a Dentist

It’s essential to see a dentist regularly for checkups and cleanings. Most people should see a dentist every six months. However, if you have gum disease or another dental problem, you may need to see a dentist more often. Additionally, if you’re pregnant, you should see a dentist during your pregnancy.

If you think you may have a dental problem, it’s essential to see a dentist as soon as possible. Early treatment can help prevent the problem from getting worse. Additionally, if you’re experiencing pain, you must see a dentist. Dental issues are often treated with simple procedures, such as fillings or crowns.

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Breast Cancer Awareness Month

October 12, 2022October 13, 2022 Looking for the Light2 Comments

Did You Know?

1 in 8 women will be diagnosed with breast cancer in her lifetime. That’s one person every 2 minutes in the U.S

The two most common risk factors of breast cancer are being born female and getting older.

In 2022, it is estimated that nearly 44,000 people in the U.S. will die from breast cancer.

These number get my attention!

One of the most important appointments you can keep each year is to get a mammogram.

Fortunately, organization like Susan G. Komen spend each year advocating and educating themselves on the latest research. With them staying in top of the facts, its helps us by getting the latest information.

Know Your Risk

Knowing your family history is lifesaving. Talk to a doctor about your family history and see how that history impacts your risk of breast cancer. You and your doctor can create a personalized plan to monitor for signs of the disease.

Get Screened

For those at average risk, have a mammogram every year starting at age 40. If you have any signs of breast cancer, finding it early and treating it early may save your life.

Make Healthy Lifestyle Choices

Living a healthy lifestyle is within your control and may lower your risk of breast cancer. Maintain a healthy weight, limit alcohol intake and exercise regularly. It all matters when it comes to your overall health and risk of disease.

Need Help?

The Komen Breast Care Helpline is a free resource available for every person, including survivors, caregivers, those living with metastatic breast cancer and people who have not yet been touched by breast cancer but have questions about how to better care for themselves. The Helpline specialists and oncology social workers provide emotional support and guidance to resources and Komen’s other Patient Care Center services, such as financial assistance, access to screening and diagnostic services, and patient navigation.

Mark you calendar early every year so you can get an appointment.

Melinda

References:

https://www.komen.org/about-komen/our-impact/breast-cancer/breast-cancer-awareness-month/

Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Thinking of Changing Homes? Here are Some Options

October 12, 2022 Looking for the Light2 Comments

The cost of living is going through the roof these days with rising energy prices, food prices, and mortgage payments; it’s no wonder people are starting to think about alternative modes of living. The good news is there are plenty of options; read on to find out more about alternative homes.

Smaller Homes

Living in a large family home might have made perfect sense a few years ago when you took out the mortgage, but nowadays, the financial landscape looks somewhat different. The mortgage market has changed, making homes more expensive, and there is an energy crisis.

One solution is to sell a larger home and downsize; why not move to a family-sized apartment or a smaller family home? A smaller family home is a chance to live in a new area, but it’s also a way to reduce your mortgage payments and your energy bills. It might also free up some cash.

Tiny Homes

If you’re feeling ambitious and adventurous, or you want to try something novel, why not consider a tiny home? Tiny homes come in all shapes and sizes; some of them have a chassis that allows you to move them around by car; others are in fixed locations with beautiful views.

Forget about waiting all year for a family holiday and a chance to “get away from it all,” turn your everyday life into a dream life and benefit from a holiday lifestyle every day. Again, tiny homes offer plenty of advantages, such as lower energy bills, lower maintenance, and lovely vistas.

Condominium Living

There are several advantages to remortgaging your home and living on a smaller scale with your family; you free up some cash that you can use to upgrade a smaller home or take your family on a special break, and you save a lot of money in general thanks to the cost of living.

Condominiums are an excellent choice. With a condominium, you get a sizable living space for your family, friendly neighbors all around you, and services in the area, such as cleaning services, a swimming pool, and more. Find out more about Multifamily Construction today.

Build a Home

If none of the options above take your fancy, why not design and build a bespoke home for your family? There’s no doubt that building a home is a big project, but it has lots of advantages; creating a bespoke home means you have exactly what you want, and it’s a great investment.

Start by choosing the perfect site for your home; since you have the option, you might as well choose somewhere that suits your family, such as a location close to schools and amenities or one with a wonderful view. Also, select the ideal architect to design and build the property.

Move Overseas

If you have an adventurous spirit, why not take your family overseas to live? Living overseas is not only an enriching experience for your growing children, but you can usually find some bargain properties in stunning locations. Chances are the cost of living is much lower as well.

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

World Smile Day 7th (It’s never too late)

October 10, 2022 Looking for the LightLeave a comment

The first Friday of October is World Smile Day (October 7), a relatively new holiday with a fascinating story. Created by a commercial artist named Harvey Ball, this day came about as a response to his creation of the smiley face. Harvey worried that the commercialization of the symbol would lessen its impact. We can hardly blame him for his estimation; the symbol has been used in many different ways including clothing, comic books, coffee mugs, pins, and more. These little yellow faces are more than just a symbol, they’re a statement about the power of smiling.

HISTORY OF WORLD SMILE DAY

In 1963, Harvey Ball, a graphic artist and ad man from Worcester, Massachusetts, created the smiley face symbol we’ve all come to know. Popularity for this symbol exploded into the world of popular culture. It’s every artists’ dream for their work to be respected and recreated and few symbols have had quite the legacy that Harvey’s creation has had.

Throughout the years, the smiley face has become one of the most well-known symbols in the world. It has appeared in movies such as ‘Forest Gump’ and used as a motif in the graphic novel, ‘Watchmen.’ It’s so well-known that just by saying “smiley face”, we bet that you can see it in your mind. That recognizable yellow circle with black dots for eyes and a simple curve for a genuine and pure smile. However, the original smiley face had more of an oblong smile, a bit more hand drawn in aesthetic, taking up more space on the face than we see in modern recreations. Because of its overuse, it started to move away from its intent of goodwill and good cheer and he knew something had to be done.

In 1999, World Smile Day became an official holiday in order to regain control. The celebration aspects of the day were simple yet effective: people were to use the day to smile and make small acts of kindness worldwide. Harvey wanted to keep the smile connected to the human being. By doing so, you’d smile and in return, you’d make someone else smile and brighten up their day.

This is a day I can give support to everyday! SMILE!

Melinda

References:

World Smile Day

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Blogger Highlight-Mollie Player

October 10, 2022 Looking for the Light1 Comment

Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week I highlight a new blogger, Mollie Player.

MOLLIE PLAYER

FEATS OF GREAT STRENGTH

Self-help author and mental health counselor Mollie Player has one goal: to help people accomplish feats of great strength. These feats include: living simply, parenting peacefully, achieving personal goals, overcoming depression and anxiety, maintaining healthy relationships, increasing self-acceptance and, ultimately, achieving inner peace.

You must check out Mollie Player’s site, you won’t be disappointed.

Melinda

Looking for the Light

Celebrate Life · Fun · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

Fun Facts

October 8, 2022 Looking for the Light6 Comments

Hi, thanks for stopping by today. I love hearing your comments each week. We learn some interesting things, don’t we?

Honeybees can get drunk on fe

It’s a common misconception that squirrels forget where they hide about half of their nuts.

People with brain damage can suffer from “joke addiction.”

Billy goats urinate on their own heads to smell more attractive to females.

There isn’t a single verified case of a snow leopard attacking a human.

Enjoy!

Melinda

Reference:

https://www.thefactsite.com/top-100-random-funny-facts/

Celebrate Life · Fun · Men & Womens Health

Want To See Awards Again, Why Not Start With The Versatile Blogger Award

October 8, 2022 Looking for the Light3 Comments

This is a post from 2015 about The Versatile Blogger Award. There was a time when Awards were common and then they stopped. You can start them again. If you know a blogger that fits the description I encourage you to send them the award. It’s a nice way to say you’re thinking about them.

If you’re interested in what awards are out there, you can do a WP search or look back thru my archives, you’ll have to look a ways back, maybe 2015 & 2016 because I stopped taking awards after my page was overflowing with them.

Some of the bloggers below have changed sites or taking a break from writing. This post just gives you the idea and the rules of the award.

I want to give a big thanks to Blogger One Among Many for nominating me for The Versatile Blogger Award. I appreciate how you stop by often and leave comments. What makes your Blog interesting is your free-form style and open conversation about just about everything. I urge everyone to visit https://oneamongmany.wordpress.com.

7 Things About Me

In my high school street racing days, I stood between cars to start the race.

I raced our 76′ Camaro SS at Green Valley Raceway. My husband normally drove 13’s in a quarter-mile. I drove 14’s even with the mistake of throwing it into neutral. Racing gets me high, high, high! Our car had no back or passenger seats, and super hulk under the hood.

Driving in a NASCAR race is the pinnacle for me. I would wear my depends, you never know.

I love books, sometimes it’s nice to touch pages instead of a keyboard.

Once I am well, I plan to minister to sick/dying children, the elderly, and the homeless. I now know why I survived my traumatic life.

I love birds of prey. A Red Tail Hawk family stops by daily for a drink and bath. A highlight of my day.

I’m excited about starting The Pud’n Cup Charity. My gramps called me “Pud” all my life.

Awards are time-consuming yet your Blogs are special and I want to let you know. I want the WP family to meet you and enjoy your site as much as I do. It will not hurt my feelings how you choose to bend the rules.

Putting My Feet In The Dirt http://puttingmyfeetinthe.com

Better Not Broken http://betternotbroken.com

Van By The River http://vanbytheruver.wordpress.com

Bipolar for Life http://bipolarforlife.me

Noir http://sedge808.com

DDDangerous.com http://dddangerous.com

Adoption http://caseyalexanderblog.wordpress.com

**Guidelines**

Thank the person who nominated you.

Display Badge on your site.

Tell us 7 things about yourself.

Nominate 7-10 Blogs

SMILE REAL BIG! Each of you has inspired, educated, and entertained me, Thank you. Have fun passing the award along to your inspiration.

XO Warrior

Celebrate Life · Fun · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Self-Care

Favorite Health & Wellness Shower Steamers-Great Gift

October 8, 2022November 4, 2024 Looking for the LightLeave a comment

These shower steamers are great for self-care and make great gifts. I’ve looked on Amazon and was surprised by how expensive Steamers are. Treat yourself, your friends, and to family to these favorite shower steamers.

By Irena Saro & Cyna Riley-Rank

Willow and Sage by Stampington

You will need:

1 cup baking soda

1/2 cup citric acid

1/3 cup arrowroot powder

1/4 cup kaolin clay

Bowl: Large non-metallic

Spray the bottle with water

Nitrile gloves

Silicone mold: cylinder

45 drops of rosemary essential oil

45 drops peppermint essential oil

30 drops of chamomile essential oil

Dried leaves/herbs (optional)

150 drops of eucalyptus essential oil

Dried eucalyptus leaves, crushed (optional)

Mica: green (optional)

120 drops of peppermint essential oil

2 TB. menthol crystals Mica: Agua (optional)

How to Make

Add all the dry ingredients to a large, non-metallic bowl and whisk until blended. Drop the essential oils on the dry ingredients, and stir to combine. The essential oils can create droplets, which will dissolve in the following step.

Spray the mixture with a little water and incorporate it immediately to avoid a reaction. If you don’t have a spray bottle, sprinkle water on the mixture using a teaspoon.

Put on nitrile gloves to protect your hands when kneading the mixture as the citric acid can irritate sensitive skin and nail polish. The mixture should feel like damp sand and be wet enough to hold its shape when pressed together. If using colored mica and dried herbs or flowers, add them to the mixture.

Fill the silicone mold with the mixture, and press firmly into the mold using your fingertips, paying attention to the edges. Let the mixture dry for 24-48 hours. Making shower steamers can be affected by the humidity; in a humid environment, the drying time may be longer. When they feel hard and solid, carefully peel back the mold and gently pop out of the disk. Store the steamers in an airtight container or jar, and ensure that the steamers aren’t exposed to water or moisture. The shelf life is one year.

Before use, let warm water run for several minutes to moisturize the air. It’s best to place the steamer away from the running water and the drain. Ideally, only the bottom of the tabs should be wet. You can also put a shower steamer in a soap dish. Breathe in deeply as the essential oils vaporize.

These are a year-round self-care treat. Make a huge batch and then you have some for gifts. Don’t forget your self-care, save some for yourself.

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

World Mental Health Awareness Day 10th

October 8, 2022 Looking for the Light3 Comments

I can’t of a better day dedicated to educating and advocating for Mental Health. Most of you know I have Treatment Resitant Bipolar Disorder. Taking care of our Mental Health can be as simple as taking my meds every day, reducing stress, and getting enough sleep. Most importantly is to check in with yourself daily, be brutally honest with yourself and your medical team. It took me years to be honest with my doctor because I was Hypomanic and enjoyed the high. Please remember the higher you go, the harder you fall.

With so much going on, it’s easy to get caught up in the everyday tasks and have little time to self-check our emotional wellbeing.

World Mental Health Day on 10 October reminds us to pause and think about our mental health, and what we can do to protect it. 

Poor mental health can be prevented if we are supported to live well.  While we need government action to fix many of the root causes of mental health problems, such as poverty, poor housing and job insecurity, there are things we can do individually to help ourselves and the people we care about to have good mental health.  

Whilst the pandemic has, and continues to, take its toll on our mental health, the ability to reconnect through World Mental Health Day 2022 will provide us with an opportunity to re-kindle our efforts to protect and improve mental health.

Many aspects of mental health have been challenged; and already before the pandemic in 2019 an estimated one in eight people globally were living with a mental disorder. At the same time, the services, skills and funding available for mental health remain in short supply, and fall far below what is needed, especially in low and middle income countries.

The COVID-19 pandemic has created a global crisis for mental health, fueling short- and long-term stresses and undermining the mental health of millions. Estimates put the rise in both anxiety and depressive disorders at more than 25% during the first year of the pandemic. At the same time, mental health services have been severely disrupted and the treatment gap for mental health conditions has widened.

World Mental Health Day is an international day for global mental health education, awareness and advocacy against social stigma. It was first celebrated in 1992 at the initiative of the World Federation for Mental Health, a global mental health organization with members and contacts in more than 150 countries. This day, each October, thousands of supporters come to celebrate this annual awareness program to bring attention to mental illness and its major effects on peoples’ lives worldwide. In some countries this day is part of an awareness week, such as Mental Health Week in Australia.

We all agree that one of the most important aspects of a ‘good life’ is our overall health. A meaningful definition of health as a ‘healthy state of well‐being’ should address the whole person, ‘the general condition of the body and mind’. Studies show that physical and mental well‐being have a major impact on one another – cancer, diabetes, chronic pain, cardiovascular or respiratory disease should not be viewed in isolation from the possible mental and emotional issues of an individual.

This year’s theme for World Mental Health Day is a critical move forward in drawing attention to the effect of long term illness on patients with major chronic disease and their families, as well as its importance to mental health advocates. Addressing mental health issues will lead to better outcomes, better compliance, and improved quality of life for people who suffer from chronic illnesses. Campaign materials will focus on proven strategies for promoting emotional and mental well‐being while living with long term physical illness, and the role of primary care in improving access for those who suffer from mental health and long term health conditions. A special call to action section has been written by seven international health professionals, intended to show us the way forward.

As we all emerge from the pandemic, it is clear that no nation was ready for the associated mental health crisis and the effect of long COVID. In addition, many health systems are ill-prepared to deal with the physical and mental health challenges faced by their populations. On top of the pandemic, the world is also struggling to cope with effect of the war in Ukraine, the consequential displacement, climate emergency and a cost-of-living crisis, all of which have consequences for the well-being of world citizens.

Rates of people experiencing suicidal ideas are increasing globally and people with lived experiences of mental health, their families and other populations continue to tell us that their mental health well-being is not always at the forefront of governments, those who pay for services or society at large. However, we can all play our part in increasing awareness about what preventive mental health interventions work.

Melinda

References:

https://www.who.int/campaigns/world-mental-health-day/2022

Wikipedia

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2939461/

https://www.dorsetecho.co.uk/news/23019781.world-mental-health-day-awareness/

https://www.wpanet.org/post/world-mental-health-day-10th-october-2022

Celebrate Life · Fun · Men & Womens Health

Friday Quote 10/7/2022

October 7, 2022 Looking for the Light5 Comments

Hey! So glad you stopped by today, I look forward to your comments each week.

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health · Moving Forward · Survivor

From Me To You, Don’t Give Up You Are Loved

October 6, 2022 Looking for the Light1 Comment

Reposts from 2014.

I woke up weeping this morning, the reasons are never known. I sit down to write and start to cry. Unsure of what I need emotionally, my focus turns to the computer. Today I needed to hear I was loved.

Josh Groban fills my soul, maybe he can fill you with love today.

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Trigeminal Neuralgia Awareness Day 7th

October 6, 2022 Looking for the Light1 Comment

The trigeminal nerve is the largest of cranial nerves and consists of 12 pairs of nerves that control many functions of the face. Causes of trigeminal neuralgia range from pressure on the nerve, aging, or a disorder that wears away the myelin such as cerebral palsy. Other causes include injury or stroke.

Those with trigeminal neuralgia may experience severe pain in the face and jaw. Even slight stimulation can trigger pain. The pain can be shooting or jabbing. Before an episode begins, some sufferers experience a burning sensation. The pain may be localized or spread and may worsen over time. It can also last a few minutes or days.

While treatments such as surgery or medications may provide relief, the condition is progressive over time.

About Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN)

Before we can celebrate the passing of this special day, we must first understand what trigeminal neuralgia is. TN is a disorder of the fifth cranial nerve (the trigeminal nerve) that causes chronic pain. It comes in two forms: TN1 and TN2. One can be affected by both of these types, but TN2 is typically a progression of TN1. This condition causes extreme and burning pain in the face, excessive salivation, depression, anxiety, and facial or head contortion. This pain can be triggered by routine activities such as brushing your teeth, shaving, or drinking a hot beverage; however, there is not always a trigger. An episode can occur spontaneously. TN may be caused by multiple things, such as multiple sclerosis, tumors, tangled arteries, an injury to the trigeminal nerve, or a blood vessel pressing on that nerve.

Physical and neurological examinations will be used to find a diagnosis, along with a review of patient history. In order to rule out other conditions, doctors may employ MRIs. Once a diagnosis is obtained, treatment consists of surgery, psychotherapy, anticonvulsants, and antidepressants. Doctors also recommend meditation and yoga.

A chronic painful disease which affects the trigeminal nerves present in the face. Trigeminal nerves carries sensation from face to brain.

Rare (Fewer than 200,000 cases per year in US)

Often requires lab test or imaging

Treatable by a medical professional

Can last several years or be lifelong

It is caused by the disruption of myelin present around the trigeminal nerve. Symptoms include facial pain, difficulty in chewing, speaking, and brushing. Treatment includes medication, and surgery.

Symptoms

The symptoms include:

Severe shooting pain that may feel like an electric shock
Pain or attacks activated by touching the face, biting, talking or brushing
Pain areas include the ear, eyes, forehead, jaw, or mouth and face
Over sensitivity, sensitivity to pain, or uncomfortable tingling and burning
Can be only one attack of pain, some may experience sharp pain every hour or every few seconds

Treatments

Treatment includes medication, and surgery.

Medication

Anticonvulsants: To lessen the pain and to treat trigeminal neuralgia.
Carbamazepine · Oxcarbazepine · Lamictal
Anti-spasmodic medication: Relax muscles.
Baclofen · Lioresal
Neurotoxins: Botox injection helps to reduce pain in conditions where tablets fail due to side effects.
OnabotulinumtoxinA
Glycerol injection: Injection of a small amount of sterile glycerol destroys the trigeminal nerve and blocks pain signals.
Glycerol

Medical procedures: Balloon compression · Microvascular decompression · Brain stereotactic radiosurgery · Radiofrequency thermal lesioning

I’m so thankful that research dollars are spent on a rare disease and I’m sure those with the illness are grateful too.

Melinda

References:

National Today

https://patientworthy.com/2021/10/14/celebrating-national-trigeminal-neuralgia-awareness-day/

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Optimize Your Smartphone for Better Mental Health

October 4, 2022 Looking for the Light5 Comments

Smartphones have come to dominate our lives, we use them for work, socializing, entertainment, and more; but they can seriously affect our mental well-being at the same time. Still, you don’t need to abandon your phone, simply optimize it and live a healthier lifestyle. Read on to find out how to make your smartphone lifestyle healthier and more beneficial.

Hide Social Media

Social media can enhance someone’s life significantly, it helps people to stay connected around the world and creates a space for self-expression; but there’s a dark side to social media that most people have encountered, the tendency to compare our lives to our friends and rivals.

Social media and poor mental health have a close correlation because the platforms are as addictive as they are harmful. If you don’t want to take some breathing space from social media try hiding the apps on your smartphone so they are less convenient to locate spontaneously.

Reduce Notifications

A smartphone – like an internet itself – demands your attention! Apps, websites, and emails, all want to send you a notification about the latest update. Of course, this service can be useful if you require updates for your work or social life, but it also interferes with your everyday life.

Living with a smartphone is a game of cat and mouse in some sense, the device is demanding your attention and you have to handle this demand responsibly. One of the best ways to reduce its hold on your life is to optimize the notifications of apps, chats, and websites, to relevant ones.

Digital Downtime

There’s nothing wrong with having an iPhone 13 in your life but you need to know how to use it to protect your mental health and wellbeing. If you find that your digital life is starting to stress you it’s time for digital downtime. Remember, the stress hormone can be very damaging for you.

Digital downtime involves giving yourself permission to turn off your phone for a period and live life on your own terms. It can be challenging at first but separating yourself from your device indicates your level of attachment to technology. Train yourself to find a better overall balance.

Mental Health Apps

Smartphones might be the source of some mental health conditions, but they can also be the solution. There is a wide range of apps to support mental health and wellbeing, so browse through them and find one that supports your life situation the best. Here are a few options.

Betterhelp is a therapy app; when you sign up to BetterHelp you get access to a wide range of accredited and experienced mental health therapists. The app matches you to a suitable practitioner and you can contact them when you need them. Insight Timer is for meditation.

Final Thoughts

Smartphones are an amazing piece of technology, modern devices have the same processing power as the Nasa computers in the 1960s that sent a mission to the mood. The downside is the mental health issues that go with the amazing capabilities. So look after your mental health.

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health

How to change your relationship with food — and stop eating your feelings

October 4, 2022 Looking for the Light1 Comment

This post was so popular I wanted to share it again. Melinda

Ideas.Ted.Com

Mar 4, 2019 / Daryl Chen

Jenice Kim

Here are three common-sense tips to help you feed your hunger and not your emotions, from dietician Eve Lahijani.

This post is part of TED’s “How to Be a Better Human” series, each of which contains a piece of helpful advice from someone in the TED community. To see all the posts, go here.

Imagine if eating were as simple as, say, refueling a car. You’d fill up only when an indicator nudged towards E, you couldn’t possibly overdo it or else your tank would overflow, and you’d never, ever dream of using it as a treat.

Instead, for many of us, eating is anything but straightforward. What starts out as a biological necessity quickly gets entangled with different emotions, ideas, memories and rituals. Food takes on all kinds of meanings — as solace, punishment, appeasement, celebration, obligation – and depending on the day and our mood, we may end up overeating, undereating or eating unwisely.

It’s time for us to rethink our relationship with food, says Eve Lahijani, a Los Angeles-based dietician and a nutrition health educator at UCLA. She offers three common-sense steps to help get there.

1. Reconnect with your hunger.

So many things drive us to eat — it’s noon and that means lunchtime, it’s midnight and that means snack time, we’re happy, we’re anxious, we’d rather not bring home leftovers, we’re too polite to say no, we’re bored, and oh, wow, has someone brought in donuts?!?

Similarly, we suppress our appetite for a myriad of reasons — we’re too busy, we’re sad, we’re mad, nobody else is eating, it’s too early, it’s too late, we’re too excited.

Now try doing this: Eat only when you’re hungry; stop when you’re full. “It may seem obvious to you,” concedes Lahijani. Still, think over your past week: How many times did you eat when you weren’t hungry?

She suggests that we think about our hunger and our fullness on a 0-10 scale, with 0-1 being famished and 9-10 being painfully stuffed (as in holiday-dinner stuffed). She says, “You want to begin eating when you first get hungry, and that correlates with the three or a four on the scale and [to stop] … when you first get comfortably full, a six or seven on the scale.”

The reason you shouldn’t wait until you’re starving (or, 0-2 on the scale) is because that’s when people tend to make nutritionally unsound choices. If you’ve ever gone to the supermarket when you were ravenous, you probably didn’t fill up your cart with produce; you gravitated towards the high-calorie, super-filling items.

Lahijani says, “It’s also wise to eat when you first get hungry because you’re more likely to enjoy your food [and] you’re more likely to eat mindfully … When you let yourself get too hungry, chances are, you’re eating really fast and not really paying attention. In fact, one of the biggest predictors of overeating is letting yourself get too hungry in the first place.”

2. Feed your body what it is craving.

When Lahijani was a stressed-out college and graduate student, her eating took one of two forms: she was either dieting or bingeing. As she says: “Whenever I was on a diet, the diet told me what to eat,”; while on a binge, she’d eat whatever was convenient or go all out on foods forbidden by her then-diet. Developing a different relationship with food meant stepping out of those patterns. “Instead of listening to others’ opinions of what I should eat, I became silent and I tuned into my own body,” she says. “I fed my body what it was craving.”

It turns out Lahijani didn’t crave junk food. She says, “I was actually tasting things for the first time, because my mind wasn’t filled with judgment and guilt. I actually found that my body actually craved nurturing, nourishing foods like vegetables and fruits. I actually liked my sister’s kale and quinoa salad.”

3. Try not to use food as a reward or a punishment.

It’s not surprising that we do this. After all, as children, we quickly learn that rejoicing and parties come with cake, while transgressions result in … no cake. But one of the great things about being an adult is, we can establish our own associations. By all means, let’s continue to mark our birthdays with cake — or with fresh fruit and a stockpot of homemade veggie chili if that’s what you prefer. Or, celebrate in ways that have nothing to do with eating. You can set your own rules now.

When Lahijani’s fraught feelings about food eased, she was surprised to find these effects go beyond eating. “What’s really interesting is to see how making peace with food affected other areas of my life. As I learned how to listen to myself, I became better at listening to others, I became more empathetic,” she says. “As I made a point to trust myself, I became more trusting in my relationships and more vulnerable, and as I became more loving to myself … I learned what it meant to love someone else.”

Watch her TEDxUCLA talk here:

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Making Light Work Of Decluttering

October 4, 2022 Looking for the Light4 Comments

Decluttering is all the rage as a concept, but it can help people live a calmer and more relaxed life. Living with less offers the chance to spend less time cleaning and tidying up, and physical clutter also leads to mental clutter.

So how can you make light work of the clutter in your home?

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

Donation & Free

To get rid of large items quickly or bags of clothes, you don’t feel like sorting through donations can be the fastest route. People are often happy to pick things up quickly when there isn’t a price tag.

Your chosen charity will benefit from the goods when people buy them, and you’ll know you did something for the planet and the people in the area.

Only donate things in good condition.

Yard sale

Bring the buyers to your door with a yard sale. Those who haven’t had yard sales before can feel a bit awkward just putting your items on the lawn for others to browse and buy. But some people are dedicated to buying yard sale items and selling them as a business. Reading some yard sale tips will help you make the most of the sale.

5-5-5

This could be any number, but starting with 5 is a great place. Find 5 things that need to go, 5 things you can donate, and 5 things to sell. Do this weekly to keep the steady decluttering pace without overwhelming yourself.

List

It is easy to get overwhelmed by the sheer amount of things that need to be cleared and removed. Making a list for each room can make the job a lot easier. You can check off a few items on the list and track where you have gotten up to.

Short bursts

Unless you have a team dedicated to helping you clear out the house in record time, it is more beneficial to do it in short bursts until you get to where you want to be. Doing it in short sharp bursts means it won’t become overwhelming or feel like you have taken on too much. Setting 30-minute times and selecting a goal on the list is the best way to keep progressing without taking too much.

Storage

One thing that makes people feel like they need to declutter is insufficient storage for the space. When you have the right size and style of storage, everything will have its place – and it will look less messy.

It can be as simple as adding extra shelving or getting roll-away storage under the bed.

Trash

Be ruthless when it comes to your trash. Anything that isn’t for donation and likely won’t sell should make its way to the trash. Try to recycle where possible – but make putting things in the trash one of your favorite things.

Use-by dates

Tins, jars, dried goods, makeup, and skin care have a use-by date. Go through yours and ensure that anything out or almost out makes it to the bin. This can clear up a huge amount of space.

Read more about the benefits of a clean home: Can A Clean House Make You Feel Better?

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Deep Thoughts

October 3, 2022 Looking for the Light2 Comments

In this fast-paced social media world, it can be difficult to find the time to look within or back in time. I hope you find these quotes and questions interesting. So glad you stopped by today!

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Celebrate Life · Health and Wellbeing · Men & Womens Health · Mental Health

Blogger Highlight-Gradina Magica

October 3, 2022 Looking for the Light1 Comment

Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week I highlight a new blogger, Gradina Magica.