This isn’t a complete list of all the important awareness days in October but you can see October was an informative month. I hope you participated if you had something to share and learned something as well.

I worked to share my stories, knowledge and most importantly, my passion about the day that impact me the most.

October 2021 Awareness Dates

• ADHD Awareness Month
• Breast Cancer Awareness Month
• Bullying Prevention Month
• Domestic Violence Awareness Month #WeAreResilient
• Down Syndrome Awareness Month
• Go Sober for October
• Health Literacy Month
• Physical Therapy Month
• Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month
• Prenatal-onset GBS Disease Recognition Month #GBSAM21 #starttheGBSconversation #GBS #GroupBStrep
• Spina Bifida Awareness Month
• Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) Awareness Month#SafeSleepSnap

• World Cerebral Palsy Day (06 October) #MillionsOfReasons #WorldCerebralPalsyDay
• Back Care Awareness Week (UK) (04 – 08 October) Theme: “Back Pain Working From Home”
• Malnutrition Awareness Week (USA) (04 – 08 October)
• Depression Screening Day (08 October)
• Mental Illness Awareness Week (USA) (03 – 09 October)
• World Mental Health Day (10 October)
• Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day(13 October) #MBC
• World Sight Day (14 October) Theme: “Love Your Eyes”
• Baby Loss Awareness Week (09 – 15 October)
• OCD Awareness Week (10 – 16 October)
• Mammography Day (16 October)
• World Food Day (16 October)
• UK Malnutrition Awareness Week (11 – 17 October) #UKMAW2021
• Bone and Joint Action Week (12 – 20 October)
• Health Education Week (18 – 22 October)
• International Stuttering Awareness Day (22 October)

I hope you learned something this month if one of these awareness days affects you or someone you love.

Melinda

Taking steps to improve and boost your life is so important, and you need to be proactive about the best ways of achieving this. There are so many factors you need to keep in mind when it comes to improving your life, and the best way to approach this is to consider what you want to achieve in your future. Are you happy with the direction your life is taking? What areas do you feel could be improved upon?

Life has been a bit chaotic these past 18 months, and it is really important to make sure you get back on track as much as possible. Being proactive is half the battle when it comes to achieving this, and you need to understand the steps that need to be taken to achieve this. These are some of the things you can do that will help you to improve your life and make more positive changes. 

Following a health and wellness program is a great way of being able to improve your life and enjoy a bit of guidance at the same time. There are wellness programs you can use online that are going to help you make this journey in the best way you possibly can, and one of the key resources for helping with this is kristenblakewellness.com, where you can find a code for a step-by-step wellness program that will take your life forward in a positive direction right now. 

So many people take steps to ensure they have a healthy body, but too many of them overlook the importance of a healthy mind. This is something that has a massive impact on your life as a whole, so you need to look out for some of the signs and causes of depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues. These can be highly debilitating and may impact your life in a negative way, so this is something you need to try to improve upon as much as possible. 

You should always try to do at least one thing each day that makes you happy, no matter how seemingly small it may be. This can make such a massive difference to your life and your mental state, and it is definitely something you should look to get right as much as possible. Think about what gives you pleasure and makes you happy, and you need to make sure you focus on this in order to make improvements to your life right now. 

These are all great ways of being able to take charge of your life and go in a positive direction right now. There are a lot of things that play a part in this, and it is important that you understand the best ways of being able to do this so that you can get as proactive as possible about improving your life. Try to come up with the best ways of achieving this, and there are a lot of factors that play a part in being able to do this. 

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

Chronic depression is a mental illness that millions of people experience to some degree each year. All types of things can trigger depression in anyone, such as trauma, grief, getting laid off, and money worries. The chances are high that you know someone with depression.

Did you know some depression triggers aren’t as common as the examples listed above? In fact, some causes of depression are pretty surprising. The following are six triggers that you probably wouldn’t have realized cause depression in most people:

Certain Times of the Year

Seasonal Affective Disorder, or SAD for short, is a mood disorder that can cause some people to experience symptoms of depression but only at certain times of the year. Most people with SAD experience symptoms during the winter months.

However, SAD can also strike in the summer. In those cases, the reason is that the body finds it difficult to adjust to new seasons.

Quitting Smoking

If a person used to be a heavy smoker and decided to quit the habit, they will likely experience symptoms of depression. Smoking can obviously be addictive, and when a person gives up such a long-term habit, they start to get withdrawal symptoms.

Nicotine, one of the common elements in cigarettes, creates high levels of the neurotransmitters dopamine and serotonin. When a person gives up smoking, they have significantly lower levels, resulting in feelings of depression.

Chronic Pain

Have you ever noticed that people with chronic (i.e., continuous) physical pain often seem unhappy? They might take medication to ease the pain, yet they still appear sad. That’s because chronic pain can also cause depression symptoms.

It makes sense to couple medication with other forms of pain relief like therapy sessions with a chiropractor in such circumstances. Doing so can help some people have less severe symptoms of depression.

Poor Quality of Sleep

It’s no secret that people who regularly have a poor quality of sleep end up feeling irritable and generally not very pleasant to be around. However, some of those individuals could have a high risk of developing chronic depression.

If you experience a poor quality of sleep, you should take immediate steps to diagnose and resolve the reasons why that’s the case. For example, the issue might be down to an unsuitable bed or pillow, or your sleeping partner’s snoring could disturb your sleep.

Internet Addiction

Most people spend at least one or two hours each day surfing the Web and catching up on their social media feeds. If you spend significantly more time online each and every day, your Internet addiction could result in you developing depression.

Your Environment

It’s a well-known fact that people who live in abusive home environments are highly likely to develop depression. But, what you might not know is that something as simple as the area where you live can trigger depression symptoms.

That’s because people who live in densely populated areas typically have higher levels of stress, and that can trigger feelings of depression in those individuals.

Melinda

Pets keep loneliness at bay for millions of people and can help with our overwhelming thoughts and while we are more than aware of how a pet can help us with our well-being, we must remember to return the favour. Supporting your pet’s mental health is essential. The pandemic has made us a lot more anxious, but what about our pets? Our pets’ behaviour might change intense situations. But what can we do to make sure that, if we notice our pets having any signs of poor well-being, that we support them? 

Stimulating Their Senses

Providing mental stimulation is crucial. If you are currently stuck at home, you can hide treats and toys around the space to provide that all-important exercise and mental stimulation. But when life returns to normality, give them the benefits of a variety of scenery. Taking them to explore new scenery is as important to your pet’s mental health as it is to you. 

Exercising With Different Techniques 

Ensuring that they remain agile is essential. Building up their agility will teach them something new and stimulate them. If your pet needs to stay indoors, you must remember that their exercise should not suffer. You can also incorporate new toys on a heavy rotation. A variety of interactive toys can keep your pet interested and stimulated. There is a lot to consider. And when you start to stimulate their senses, you give them that all-important distraction. 

Access to Light

Fresh air is important, as well as light and exposure to a variety of senses. Giving them exposure to different smells and sounds provides simulation. You have to remember at this point if your pet’s behaviour changes or they get frustrated, you may need to change your approach. If you are not taking your dog out much at the moment, you need to remember that the variety of noises and smells may frustrate them at not being able to go outside. 

Observing and Acting

A physically and mentally stimulated pet will be happier and healthier. Observing changes in their behaviour gives you the opportunity to spot if their mental well-being is being impacted. You should always contact a vet if you are concerned, but the solution might be closer to home. You could give them more treats if you feel you’ve been cutting back recently. There are also other ways to stimulate them, such as the soothing sounds on My Dog’s Favourite Podcast available on Spotify. It is an audio treat for your dog that could help to calm their anxieties. 

Stimulation is crucial, but we have to remember when we are trying to look after our pets and mental health that we are more observant. They could be taking their cue from us, in which case, it’s essential to focus on creating a healthier environment for everyone. We can look after our pet’s mental health. In many ways, it is simple.

Melinda

Lake of finances is a major source of worry for many people. Therefore, when there are not enough funds available for meeting your needs or in your savings, you’re more than likely to become anxious, Unfortunately, with most Americans having less than $1,000 stashed away as their savings, this problem is a pretty pervasive one. However, just because this is the norm doesn’t mean that it should be the same for you. With the right strategies, you can actually save more, thus lessening your worries and anxieties in the process.

Cut Down Bloated Financial Expenses

Take a critical look at your expenses and see where you can cut them down. The easiest way to do this is to start tracking every cent you spend. Do this for a month or two and see what expenses are important and those that aren’t. 

Then, create a budget based on those important expenses and save the rest. You’ll find that when you limit yourself to a budget and stick to it, you can make it work, regardless of your previous spending habits. 

It may not seem like a lot at first, but it does add up over time. We’ve seen families go from having less than $500 in their savings to $6,000 in savings in one year by just cutting their expenses. Interestingly, they were still quite comfortable and didn’t miss those things they cut out of their budget.   

Reconsider Your Housing Situation 

This is a tricky one considering that you need a place to live. But if you’re spending more than half of your paycheck on housing –whether mortgage or rent- you might want to consider downsizing to something more affordable until you can afford your ideal home and use the extra funds for something else. 

For instance, some people have been known to switch to manufactured homes. If you do a quick search using the mobile homes for sale search phrase, you’ll find many affordable options that are available to you. If mobile homes aren’t an appealing option, try moving to a cheaper or smaller home. Or you can seek cheaper mortgage payments for your home.

Save Unexpected Income

Most people tend to immediately send money that they didn’t expect. Yet, when you think about it, the very fact that those funds were unexpected means that they can actually live without spending those funds. 

Whether the money is in the form of a bonus, cash gifts, or extra commission, determine to put that money aside immediately it comes in. Do this a few times and you’ll soon see your savings grow. 

Lower Your Energy Bills

Energy consumption and utility bills are often a sizable part of the average monthly expense. So, it makes sense that if you can cut down on how much you pay for your utilities –particularly during the summer and winter months- you could save some more money. 

Some things that you can do to lower your energy bills include changing your bulbs to energy saver bulbs, using energy-efficient HVAC systems, not leaving the heater or AC on in rooms that are unoccupied, and much more. 

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

When you’re a parent, the last thing that you want to worry about is whether or not your kids are receiving quality medical care. Unfortunately, there are many instances where people have gotten subpar care because they didn’t know their rights.

It’s essential to be proactive and ensure that your family has access to medical treatment while also ensuring it is safe and sound. In this blog post, you will get information on how to do just that!

Have Regular Checkups

Having regular checkups is something that everybody should do. Even if you feel well, it is always good to make sure your body is functioning the way it should be and take steps towards any issues before they become serious problems.

If, for example, your family has a history of certain conditions like cancer or diabetes, regular checkups are something that everyone in your family needs to do regardless of their age or health status. Checkups will allow doctors and nurses to catch things early on while still fixing them efficiently instead of waiting until there’s more extensive damage done.

Always Be Keen and Ask Questions

Asking questions is essential. Your doctor will not think you are troublesome, and it is their job to answer your questions anyway! If they do not, ask another doctor until someone can provide satisfying answers that give you peace of mind. The same goes for nurses and other medical professionals: the more information all parties have available about your treatment plan, the better care everyone gets as a result.

And if something does go wrong due to a breach on the doctor’s part, you can always seek legal advice from a medical malpractice attorney to help you acquire damages for violation. By doing so, you will not be negligent about your medical rights.

Ensure That Your Medical Rights Are Respected

Your health care providers should understand that you are a vital part of the medical team. You should ask questions and communicate with them about any concerns you have without feeling judged. Staff members at hospitals and clinics should treat you with respect.

When doctors order tests for you as a patient, they need to explain what they are for you to make informed decisions. If there’s something wrong with how things work in this area, speak up! Like other rights citizens enjoy, your right to advocate for yourself will only strengthen if you exercise frequently.

Other medical rights include having access to quality health care providers and receiving advice on navigating the system. You also have the right to get satisfactory answers to your questions concerning insurance coverage and everything you need to be an active participant in making good choices about taking control of your well-being.

Conclusion

In conclusion, it is crucial to make sure that your medical care providers do everything they can to protect you from harm. Remember, this means not just getting treatment for a severe injury or illness — it also includes making sure you have all the information and resources available to take steps towards preventing health issues before they become emergencies.

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

Growing old can be tough on both your physical and mental health. Losing mobility can mean that you lose independence, and unfortunately, it’s all too common to start losing those around you due to health conditions and other issues that affect the elderly. Offering your support to an elderly relative during their time of need could change their quality of life dramatically, giving them a pep in their step and a reason to carry on. It needn’t be difficult to provide your elderly relative with the helping hand that they need to thrive, as there are a few key areas in which you can focus your efforts to keep them as happy and healthy as possible. So, if you would like to find out more, then read on to uncover some of the best tips and tricks that you can utilize today! 

The first step you should take when you gain the responsibility of caring for an elderly relative involves visiting their healthcare specialist to get a better idea of their current situation. They will be able to inform you of any specific issues such as difficulty with mobility, signs of Alzheimer’s, and any other potential issues that may need to be considered during your care. Their healthcare specialist will also be able to advise you on whether they believe your elderly relative can live comfortably in their own home or may feel better inside a specialized care facility that can meet their medical needs. 

If it’s recommended that your elderly relative should stay in the comfort of their own home, it’s vital that you are able to make some adaptations to suit their requirements. This could mean installing grab bars in places such as the bathroom and corridors, as these can be used for extra balance and mobility when your relative moves around their house independently. In addition, a stairlift is an essential investment for a home that’s laid out over more than one level, as stairs are a real hazard area for the elderly and it simply isn’t worth the risk. 

Staying social by meeting up with friends and family is something that you most likely take for granted, as this just isn’t possible for elderly people. It would be such a miserable existence if your elderly relative were to sit inside their care facility, watching and waiting for a visitor that never arrives as they see other residents meet with their nearest and dearest. You must make an effort to go and see them as much as you can, especially if they no longer live in their own home, as they need interaction with people they know and love! This will also give them the chance to discuss any issues they have. Every facility has a commitment to outstanding care and these expectations must always be met. 

Melinda

What is Seasonal Affective Disorder? 

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is an older term for Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) with a seasonal pattern. It’s a psychological condition that results in depression which is normally provoked by seasonal change. The condition most often occurs in women, adolescents, and young adults.

Many times people will start to see a pattern to their depression as the seasons change. This is common in the winter months and in areas where it is darker more than there is light outside. SAD is more common the countries like Alaska and Canada than in South America.

SAD is classified into two types, one in the Summertime and the other in the Wintertime. The symptoms are markedly different.

Summertime symptoms are:

agitation

difficulty sleeping

increased restlessness

lack of appetite

weight loss

Wintertime symptoms are:

daytime fatigue

difficulty concentrating

feelings of hopelessness

increased irritability

lack of interest in social activities

lethargy

reduced sexual interest

unhappiness

weight gain

How do you know if you have Seasonal Affective Disorder?

If you notice these symptoms you should talk with your doctor right away and it would help if you kept a journal as to when the depression started. This will help the doctor make a correct diagnosis especially if you notice the changes appear to be seasonal. The more information you can provide the doctor more accurately they can diagnosis your depression.

How do you treat Seasonal Affective Disorder? 

Your doctor can determine the best treatment and in severe cases, may prescribe medication or a combination of treatments. One treatment known to help is Light Box Therapy or a Lamp because they are specially designed to put out a minimum of 10,000 Lux full-spectrum light.

Here’s my post on the Top 5 SAD Lamps

I hope you will seek out more information and talk with your doctor if your symptoms are troubling you.

Melinda

Reference

https://www.healthline.com/health

https://www.webmd.com/depression/sad-directory

https://www.webmd.com/depression/depression-or-dysthymia#1

IDEAS.TED.COM

Dec 9, 2020 / Mary Halton

This post is part of TED’s “How to Be a Better Human” series, each of which contains a piece of helpful advice from people in the TED community; browse through all the posts here.

If the darkening evenings and turning leaves induce a mild sense of dread in you every year, you’re not alone.

With the arrival of winter, many of us experience Seasonal Affective Disorder — which bears the appropriate acronym of SAD — and can bring on a depressed mood, loss of interest in things that you normally enjoy, and changes in sleep and appetite. While there aren’t conclusive figures, it is thought to affect between one and nine percent of the population, depending on where you live.

Although we may think of it as being a distinct affliction of its own, SAD is actually classified as either bipolar or major depressive disorder, but with a seasonal pattern. This means that people who experience it feel much worse in the fall and winter and relatively balanced or potentially even manic in the summer months, explains Kathryn Roecklein PhD, an associate professor of psychology at the University of Pittsburgh who studies the condition.

“Depression itself is pretty episodic,” says Roecklein. “You have a period of it, and then it goes away. The distinction [with SAD] is the seasonal recurrence.” It also appears that SAD is two to four times more common amongst women.

Even though we are making greater efforts as a society to recognize the importance of our mental health, it can be tempting to dismiss SAD as a touch of the “winter blues” and to try to get on with life as usual. But the best approach, Roecklein says, is to accept and recognize that it’s something that we may genuinely suffer from — and need treatment for. Just as we would for heart disease or diabetes.

Why does winter make us SAD?

The story of SAD starts with our circadian rhythm — our internal body clock that tells us when to eat, go to sleep and wake up. 

For the most part, we tend not to think too much about this system unless we have an unexpectedly late night or take a long-haul flight. But chronobiologist Emily Manoogian PhD says it plays a much more significant role.

“The circadian system is directly tied to how our brain functions, and this affects our cognitive ability, our behavior, our mood and our ability to remember things,” says Manoogian, who researches circadian rhythms at the Salk Institute for Biological Studies in California. “The circadian system is important for making sure that throughout your body and brain, regions are talking to each other the way that they should be and everything is balanced. We know that circadian disruption is heavily associated with every form of affective disorder — such as major depressive disorder, bipolar disorder, etc.”

Increased darkness in the fall and winter months is something that humans on much of the planet have experienced for thousands of years, but our technological advancement — in particular, artificial light — is interfering with this natural occurrence. Light is one of the most powerful stimuli for our circadian systems, and since the advent of electricity we’ve been sending our bodies a lot of mixed messages.

“This environment that we’ve created is inherently disruptive — it’s not lights on and off at a constant time to allow for a proper rest for our body; it’s lights on when we need to be up for work on some days, and then off later on other days,” explains Manoogian. “That creates this kind of social jetlag. That’s also going to make it a lot harder to sleep, and it can compromise health over time.”

Manoogian is also not a fan of daylight savings time. She says, “It shifts our exposure to sunlight later in the day and thus shifts our biological clocks. In the summer, we are getting sunlight later than we should, and when days are shorter, we are waking up in darkness. But the problem is that we still have to start work or school at the same times. This means that our schedules and our body are on different times, and this disrupts the circadian system.”

Although there is no evidence connecting it directly to SAD, daylight savings time is known to be widely disruptive to society and potentially even associated with cardiac health risks. There’s a growing movement to do away with the twice-annual time switch in several Canadian provinces, where Saskatchewan and (as of 2020) the Yukon Territory stick to the same time year-round, and similar proposals are being considered in other jurisdictions around the world.

What can you do?

As with any disorder, your treatment depends in part on severity. If SAD is significantly disrupting your life or making you feel as though life is not worth living anymore, it’s deeply important for you to reach out immediately to a mental health professional who can support you. Roecklein says that effective treatment options include taking medication, receiving cognitive behavioral therapy tailored to treating SAD, or using a SAD lamp (which delivers a higher dose of light than regular indoor lighting), but they should be explored under professional guidance.

If you’re wondering what to do because you’ve already bought a SAD lamp to use on your own, Roecklein says that there could be side effects. The most likely one, which is mild, is that you will feel it isn’t effective. This doesn’t mean that it can’t be the right therapy for you in conjunction with professional guidance — for instance, you could be using it at the wrong times or for the wrong duration. At the other end of the scale, mania is a very rare but significant side effect of improper use.

However, there are some relatively easy things you can do to support your circadian rhythms in everyday life. And while these aren’t guaranteed treatments for SAD, they can help give your body a stabilizing sense of routine.

Keep a consistent schedule, especially if you work from home

This doesn’t need to be a rigid, planned-down-to-10-minute increments affair; it’s more about keeping the stimuli that speak to your circadian system arriving roughly when it expects them, says Manoogian. Social interactions and food are two important circadian cues, so having regular mealtimes and breaks where you make a phone call, go for a walk or talk with other members of your household can really help.

Exercise is another important cue

It’s hard to get — and stay — motivated during a winter of pandemic-related restrictions, so any exercise is better than no exercise at all, emphasizes Manoogian. However, if you do choose to exercise outside, she says that the morning is a good time for your body to get some much needed natural light.

The only time for you to avoid exercising, if possible, is right before bed. When you do, it sends a confusing message to your body that night is a time to be active rather than to prepare for sleep.

Maximizing your light exposure is key

How much light we experience at different times of the day is important. Increasing the amount of light you get in the morning is helpful, whereas increasing your light exposure in the evening can be counterproductive.

So if your morning commute has changed from an hour in the car or on transit to a quick switch from your bed to your desk, you’re losing out on a lot of daylight that you are used to receiving just when you need it most. Taking a morning walk before you start your day, or even sitting near a bright window for the first half of your day can really help.

At night, reducing your light exposure and making your sleeping environment as dark as possible is also of huge benefit, explains Roecklein. “Most circadian biologists and sleep researchers I know have blackout shades and no night lights in their rooms — we don’t even have clocks with illuminated screens.”

No, it’s not just you — 2020 may be making your SAD worse

It’s difficult to separate the impacts of factors like the COVID-19 pandemic, the associated economic downturn and the psychological toll of the current political climate. But Roecklein has noted, at least anecdotally among the people in her SAD study, that there seems to be a higher instance of what psychologists refer to as “negative anticipatory cognitions” — where people consistently expect things to be worse in 2020 than in other years.

Roecklein also notes that experiencing negative life events — such as a bereavement, job loss or some other major change that requires large adjustment — as well as reduced opportunities for social and physical activity are additional risk factors for SAD. These areas of our lives have all been significantly impacted by COVID-19, so she and her colleagues anticipate a higher risk of people experiencing SAD this year.

However, there may be one small silver lining to the current situation, says Manoogian. While routine is very important for our bodies, a regular 9-5 work day can be very unnatural for those of us who aren’t morning people.

“The typical workday schedule is an artificial time that not everyone is able to stick to,” she explains. “If you work from home and you have a little bit of freedom about when you work, this could provide a very interesting opportunity for you to actually coordinate your schedule more with your internal clock.”

Sometimes it’s OK to doomscroll 

Lastly, Roecklein wants to stress that although a routine is important, we are living through monumental events that are unfolding right before our eyes. And if we occasionally want to stay up a few hours later to feel better informed or more connected to other people experiencing the same thing… that’s actually fine.

“We take a moment to care for ourselves by thinking about the pros and cons. So there may be some nights where staying up late and doomscrolling is a choice one might make for good reasons,” says Roecklein. “But then on other nights, when we think about what we want most for ourselves — like better energy in the morning, a more positive mood, better alertness for the endless Zoom meetings — we might be more motivated to turn off devices, turn off the TV, dim the lights, and do all of those things that can help you wind down. Give yourself the chance to make that decision, and make the decision that’s right for you.”

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Mary Halton is Assistant Ideas Editor at TED, and a science journalist based in the Pacific Northwest.

IDEAS.TED.COM

Mar 6, 2019 / Mary Halton

If your self-worth seems to rise and fall according to what other people think, you’re not alone. But you can challenge this mindset and find a new way of valuing yourself, says psychologist Meag-gan O’Reilly.

This post is part of TED’s “How to Be a Better Human” series, each of which contains a piece of helpful advice from someone in the TED community. To see all the posts, go here. 

“How often do you get asked ‘What do you do?’ and feel like that question is going to determine how much attention or respect you receive?” That’s a question posed by Meag-gan O’Reilly, staff psychologist at Stanford University’s Vaden Health Center in Palo Alto, California, in a TEDxSJSU talk.

Perhaps you had the stomach-sinking experience of seeing your questioner’s face change or their eyes glaze over when they hear your response. It’s lousy. Instead of being seen and appreciated for all of your complicated individuality, you feel like your worth has been judged in a flash — and found wanting.

But getting a nod of approval is also unsettling, says O’Reilly. “Even those of us who seem to be winning at these conditions stand to lose because conditions change with time, age or unexpected hardships.”

O’Reilly recalls a vivid example from her own life. Once, at a party, she went up to the host — someone she’d never met before — to thank him for his hospitality. She smiled, stuck out her hand, and, she recalls, “I was met with the response of ‘Qualify yourself.’ … That’s when his friend beside him reiterated the question with more clarity: ‘Qualify yourself; tell him why he should talk to you.’”

O’Reilly says, “Immediately my mind split into two paths. The first and more dominant voice got to work on the task … What are the bells and whistles of my existence that I can showcase to woo and persuade this person I’m worth his time?”

Meanwhile, the other part of her was stunned, as she put it, that “there was a litmus test for conversation. I’m happy to say that this part of me won out. I didn’t engage. I simply said, ‘Thanks again for hosting’ and walked away.”

This incident spurred O’Reilly to think about how small moments like these can chip away at our self-worth. “As a psychologist who’s heard and held hundreds of human stories, I have witnessed firsthand how this mentality of feeling like you are not enough has stolen dreams, ambitions, relationships, health and happiness away from people,” she says.

For some of us, these encounters echo earlier occasions in our lives when we felt like our value as a person was determined by other people — usually adults — and fluctuated depending on what they thought of our latest grade, game, performance or accomplishment. O’Reilly says, “Think to yourself for a moment: What were some of the early messages you received about who you needed to be to show up in the world as meaningful?”

No matter how deep-rooted these experiences and feelings are, we can free ourselves from thinking that we’re not enough. This undoing may take a while to happen so we should be patient, cautions O’Reilly. “It’s a process, and I call it lifespan work.”

Here’s how we can start challenging the not-enough mindsets in ourselves and in the people around us, according to O’Reilly. 

1. Do what makes you — not other people — happy.

Feeling like you’re not enough can sometimes lead you to take on certain friends, hobbies, projects or jobs that you think will make you look good in other people’s estimation. O’Reilly asks: “When was the last time you did something not because it’s going to show up on your resume, not because it meets that condition of worth you’re wrestling with, but just because you enjoyed it?”

It’s important to pursue the things that you genuinely enjoy because “it softens our stance toward ourselves,” says O’Reilly. “It allows us a zoomed-out perspective and gives us a chance to experience ourselves and others in a non-conditional way.” When you’re in the flow of doing what you love, you can shake off the weight of judgements and expectations.

2. Recognize that you have value — period.

Believing you’re enough does not mean that you should lower the bar for what you’d like to accomplish in life, emphasizes O’Reilly; it’s just that your personal enoughness remains constant and isn’t affected by your actions. She says, “Please go and achieve much. But do it in such a way that you know there’s a floor or a baseline of worth that you cannot descend below.”

Contrary to what some people fear, recognizing our inherent self-worth does not mean that we’ll be full of our own self-importance. O’Reilly says, “An inflated sense of self-esteem sounds like … ‘I can do it, I’m the best,” whether or not that’s actually true.” Inherent value, she adds, “sounds like ‘This is important to me, and I’m going to do my best … but it doesn’t define me.’”

3. When you meet new people, go beyond your job, title or school. 

If we’d like to remove the judgment associated with the “So, what do you do?” question, we can also change how we respond to it. “The next time someone asks you what you do, don’t provide an occupation or field of study,” says O’Reilly. “Instead, share with them something that you cherish about yourself; try to break interpersonal ground with them and not start with labels.” (For more advice on the topic, read the TED Ideas article “How to introduce yourself so you’ll be unforgettable — in a good way.”)

4. Respond with love and acceptance to the successes and failures of your family, friends and colleagues. 

Similar to the previous point, we need to try to model a new way of being if we want to ease the not-enough mindset in the people around us. Given how achievement-oriented society can be, says O’Reilly, “this is difficult … but a person is not a product and we need a culture that delineates the two and helps us see that one does not define the other.”

Wouldn’t you like the most important people in your life — young or old — to feel like they are enough? By appreciating them and showing that your care for them is unconditional, you can create change that will ripple outwards. “Enough is enough with these worth wars we’re waging,” O’Reilly says. “Think about how radically different our world and relationships would be if each of us actually acted like we all had inherent value.”

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Mary Halton is Assistant Ideas Editor at TED, and a science journalist based in the Pacific Northwest.

Everyone will encounter stress in life. Sometimes, this stress is entirely justified, and it’s all about how you respond to it. However, people will also experience unnecessary stress that can make them feel overwhelmed and affect their mental wellbeing, performance, and even relationships with those they love. Feeling overwhelmed is never a pleasant experience, and if you encounter this regularly, you need to identify ways to overcome it. Here are four steps you can use the next time it occurs. 

Identify The Trigger 

You cannot start to battle feelings of being overwhelmed without understanding your triggers. Many triggers can affect people, ranging from too much work to too much noise or even working with someone you do not get on with. Once you recognize your triggers, you can consider ways to avoid stress spikes. From here, you can look for ways to avoid the triggers, but if this isn’t possible – especially in professional settings – you can work out how to cope with them. 

Stop and Step Away

There is no use in doing anything if you are stressed and overwhelmed. You are not thinking straight, leading to severe mistakes that put you and others in danger. If possible, you should stop what you’re doing and step away to remove yourself from the situation. There are breathing exercises that you can use to reduce stress, which can help clear your head and make it easier to think and consider your next move. 

Ask Yourself If You Can Solve the Problem Now

Some problems are easily overcome, others are not. If you encounter an issue, you should ask whether you’re able to solve it right now. Things like situational stress are easier to solve than financial stress, which can take time and a plan. If you’re able to solve the problem right now, go ahead and do it. However, if you cannot solve the issue in the immediate moment, don’t worry about it too much. As challenging as this approach is, especially for those who experience severe stress and anxiety, it will at least allow you to think clearly at the moment and conceptualize the issue. 

Get Help From Friends (Or Strangers)

You don’t need to deal with these issues alone. Friends, family, and even professional services are available to make problems more manageable. Those experiencing financial stress can compare credit and improve their standing with lenders and other financial institutions. People that feel stressed and overwhelmed in busy environments can get support from their partner, parents, siblings, or friends. Everyone looks for support differently, so work out what approach works best for you, and don’t feel embarrassed about discussing these issues with those closest to you, as they will always be happy to help. 

Overcome 

You might never truly escape those awful feelings of being overwhelmed. However, this doesn’t mean you cannot find useful and effective ways to manage these feelings. If you can take strong steps and understand how you can manage your stress, you won’t feel at the mercy of your emotions anymore. 

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

World Mental Health Day is an international day for global mental health education, awareness and advocacy against social stigma. It was first celebrated in 1992 at the initiative of the World Federation for Mental Health, a global mental health organization with members and contacts in more than 150 countries. This day, each October, thousands of supporters come to celebrate this annual awareness program to bring attention to mental illness and its major effects on peoples’ lives worldwide. In some countries this day is part of an awareness week, such as Mental Health Week in Australia.

I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder at 19 years old and didn’t get treatment until ten years later. I let my own stigma and depression dictate my well-being. I lost many good years to depression, rage, fear, and mania. It cost me in every aspect of my life: friends, money, jobs, and family.

Today I’m healthy with the help of medication and regular therapy sessions. I’m happy and have found a great medical team. This was critical to my success. If you can’t communicate with your Psychiatrist or Therapist, get another and keep changing until you can be honest with them.

I can’t stress enough how your General Practitioner isn’t qualified to manage your ongoing Mental Health matters. They are a good start but after trying medication and not getting better, you need to seek out a Psychiatrist or Therapist. They are the only ones who are specialized to understand the complex nature of Mental Health and Mental Illness.

Your Mental Health matters, every day!

Melinda

You only have to listen to the headlines or read the newspaper to see that anxiety levels are rising and a growing number of people are experiencing stress. In this guide, we’ll discuss some common causes of stress and anxiety and offer tips to help you cope. 

Unemployment is one of the most talked-about subjects at the moment, with many people losing their jobs or businesses and others struggling to hang on in theirs. Balancing the books is challenging at the best of times when you’re trying to manage a household or raise kids, but the pandemic has exacerbated difficulties and made staying in the black virtually impossible for some. If you’re experiencing financial strain, or you’ve lost your job, there is help out there. Don’t hesitate to seek advice about incentives or support measures that are available to you during the crisis and look for opportunities to increase your income if your workload is reduced or you’ve lost your job. From Forex Trading, to online courses,  blogging to temporary jobs, it’s possible to find solutions, even if they are only a short-term option to tide you over. It’s also beneficial to try and reduce spending on non-essential items and to budget to make your money stretch further and to find out about programs that could prevent you from getting into debt in the weeks ahead. Some companies are offering freezes on loan and credit card payments, for example. 

Relationships can make or break us. While some relationships lift our spirits and make us feel secure and content, others can have a negative impact. Break-ups are tough and it can take a long time to come to terms with the fact that you’re moving in a direction that is different from the one you expected to take. You might have envisioned spending your entire life with a partner, only to find that you’re now on your own. Take your time to process what has happened and to heal. Lean on the people closest to you and try to focus on the present, rather than the past. Often, relationships don’t work, and once you have a sense of perspective and time has passed, you realize that there was a good reason for parting. Let yourself feel and experience emotions and don’t put too much pressure on yourself to get on with life, start dating or stop feeling upset about the situation. Move at your own pace. Everyone copes in different ways and there is no right or wrong way to deal with relationship breakdowns. 

Do you feel like you’re swimming against the tide, or do you dread the alarm going off every morning? It’s rare to find a job you enjoy every minute of every day, but work shouldn’t be a source of severe stress or anxiety. If you are feeling under pressure, or you’re struggling to switch off, talk to your boss about your workload, address issues that are getting to you and take some time out. It’s crucial to have a balance and to enjoy downtime. Learn to say no. If you’re already working too many hours without pay, or your to-do list is endless, don’t take on more work or sign yourself up for extra commitments after work. Rest, relax and look after yourself. 

Stress and anxiety are rife at the moment. If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. There are myriad causes, but help is available. Don’t hesitate to reach out and try and take care of yourself as best you can. 

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda

We, humans, are complicated creatures capable of expressing thousands of emotions. This site shows you that anxiety and stress are common across the natural world, and animals have many ways of showing it. Unfortunately for us, humans can also be very good at hiding those emotions too, so it isn’t always possible to tell how a loved one or friend is feeling. Here are a few common signs that may suggest your friend is feeling more anxious or stressed than normal. 

Irritable 

If you have noticed that small things seem to be bothering your friend more than usual, this could be a symptom of stress or anxiety. The Calm Clinic suggests that irritability is a common sign of anxiety and can cause people to unexpectedly get upset or even lash out. If your friend has displayed these symptoms, do not be afraid to quietly and sympathetically tell them you have noticed a difference in their behavior and ask if there is anything you can do to help. They may not have noticed the change yet themselves, so give them time and space if they need it to think about their behavior and any reasons that might be causing them to feel more irritable. 

Not Sleeping

If your colleague at work is constantly reaching for the coffee, making silly mistakes, and looking exhausted, they may not be getting enough sleep. Anxiety and stress can throw off sleep patterns very quickly. According to Medical News Today, the link between stress and sleep deprivation is very common, with only 35% of Americans getting the correct amount of sleep. A lack of sleep can cause mental health problems to worsen and deepen, so sleep deprivation must be tackled. Again, this is a case of having a quiet word and asking if there is anything that keeps them up at night. If there is a worry often sharing it confidentially can help a friend to put things into perspective. Assure your friend that any discussions can be confidential, and you would only ever break confidentiality if you were worried they may harm themselves or others.

Diet Changes

Our diet can fluctuate wildly due to stress and anxiety. Some people may overeat or reach for junk food over healthier options. Others swing the other way and may cut out food altogether. Of course, dietary changes are not always linked to mental health. Only raise the question with a friend if you feel the pattern has been sustained over a substantial period, and if you suspect stress or anxiety may be the trigger for the dietary shift. You can help someone by offering to cook meals or to share lunches with them. Even a few meals in a freezer that they can reach for when they don’t have the energy to cook can make a huge difference to someone’s overall well-being. 

If your friend does let you know that they are feeling more anxious or stressed than usual, then reassure your friend that there are easy steps you can both take together which will help. Look online for expert advice and positive stories from those who have been in similar situations. 

This is a collaborative post.

Melinda