The days get lonely, when your symptoms reach the disability stage. Times can get lonely, ask friend or create a circle of like-minded friends who you can talk honestly with.  Keep Learning.

If you’re concerned about addiction, talk to Doctor as you decide the treatment best for you.One complete withdraw on Xanax and two days without Temazepam. This is a monthly struggle. The CDC is putting a tighter grip on Control  Substance management is critical if you suffer from lack of memory.

Going thru withdraw in August and not clear how, I had to understand how this happened. I get anxiety when an addictive drug is running low. I’m addicted to are Xanax, Dexedrine, Tramadol, and Morphine Patches. The Xanax and Dexedrine are for mental illness the others are for Lyme Protocol.

The ongoing frustration is with myself, CVS and my husband. It is difficult to take care of a Chronically Ill person. My husband has to work, do every task at home, grocery shopping, everything.  That’s a big understatement. I have severe dysfunction in memory & cognitive ability.

CVS had new script for increased dosage of four a day, first refill my Doctor called increased to 3 daily, a week later he increased the dosage to 4X. If CVS would have filled each new increased dosage I could skipped the experience of 100% withdraw.

Part of my Lyme Protocol is Temazepam, a restless leg medicine. If you can’t sleep you’re not reducing inflammation on your body. Inflammation is key to treating Chronic Illness. Temazepam (I’m addicted to) is a Controlled Substance, Insurance companies approve refills somewhere between days 3-5 days before running out.There’s no Texas law on when Controlled Substances are refilled. CVS made the decision to help end Drug Addiction by only refilling two days before running out. CVS made change without telling customers. The new policy on refilling your prescriptions has a huge impact on every customer. Refilling prescriptions two days before running out may cause high levels of anxiety and difficulty to make it to CVS two days before running out.

The reason I went crazy, my Temazepam, which had increased dosage , new script already at CVS pharmacy. I’m coming out of withdraw and already having nightmares of two withdraws in one month.I usually take the problems and get it done, my anxiety was so high, I had a Mental Break. Walking around with a note of how many days before running out.

All of life’s challenges ask us are we ready for the next challenge, can you rise up. I trusted God and the future before me. I’ve learned Chronic Lyme had impacted my self-image, always talking about how long before I died, always being asked who are you talking to.

The last couple weeks you’ve seen me struggle with my confidence. I’m bleeding out. I pray you learned something from the post and can a skip withdraw.

Xx  M

Are you a Survivor? Most of us have experienced trauma in our lifetime, moving forward sets your mind free and allows you back in the driver seat. There were chunks of time in my life I struggled with childhood trauma or depression left me feeling like I could not face another day. Shame from losing a job, guilt for not seeing family, another change in meds or falling into the abyss of suicidal thoughts. Sometimes we have to look back to see how far we’ve come and let the feelings of achievement soak in. The trauma of a Hacker/Cyberstalker this past month had a grip around my neck. Sleep impossible, stress, fear, lack of control, lack of understanding by family and Therapist left me feeling isolated.

I focused on examples in my life, my Granny came to mind. She experienced trauma at nine years old with the death of her father, survived as the economy slowly recovered from war, she fought until her last breath. Her and my Gramps taught me by doing, I forced myself outside to plant a flower garden while learning to walk again. Amazed at what came natural, poking for snakes, getting dirt under nails, grading the soil and working till my back hurt. I felt a deep connection to her working in the garden or watering flowers. After a few days I saw results of my hard work and realized while outside my mind quit talking.

My soul felt free, I had to stop and pat myself on the back. I would survive until the next road block. Have you taken time to give yourself credit for each step you’ve made? Today is a good day to look back to see you are moving forward.

The music this week is for the Survivor in You.

Xx M

Hang with me I need all of you! I’ve been to sick to meet par, now out of bed, training and will find out who Stalker. My WP sites are not working right, maybe  I screwed up in knee jerk after March 22, 17 Twitter attack and Stalker making it known he was on my tail.

20 yrs ago I was stalked for 6 yrs, I’m a Survivor and will not back down or lose!

I need huge favor, start rebloging everyone on site, current and past to see if have issue, it’s one hang up on both sites, personal & Survivors. I will make rounds and reblog to see if I can see a weak,link.

Any thoughts, words or direct comments on what looks not quite right leave a comment. We can win this battle together, we are or moving forward to Survive, the answer is in plain site ? Any Hacker ideas, I don’t know how, don’t want to

Arthur James Bay released Recovery, his second LP this year, it’s shines like the Red Moon. Every song pulls me in or makes me move. He’s a nice guy, still has feet on ground, not on the hamster wheel. He returned all my tweets, gave me personal message @ instead of Support. He’s thankful for the support, more importantly a second chance. I wish him great success. It’s an exciting time for British music, my ear is tuned in.  XxM

My STALKER sent a message on cell that read L/, it was time to take action. I asked if having fun yet and said I won’t be controlled! Here’s a great song for anyone who has someone on their back.

XxM

Weekend Way Back Machine with Charlie Pride

Tom Petty incapsulates everything Rock & Roll. I hadn’t seen this version, WOW.  Feel his rage, drugs, possibilities are endless.  

Breakdown  Tom Petty & Heartbreakers  12/30/1978-Winterland, San Francisco.  I’m feeling front stage today. 

Like version? How about suggestions. I always enjoy you’re thoughts & feedback.  😎M

https://youtu.be/G1cmOq9MSo

Enjoy the sunset

XxM

Have a great weekend enjoying smooth music for relaxing   M