Bella Grace Field Guide by Stampington
What’s the one thing you’ve happily said yes to lately?
What happened because of it?
Melinda
Just Pondering
Category: Mental Health
Understanding Relapse —Guest Blogger Don’t Lose Hope
Originally posted on Don’t Lose Hope : Relapse is commonplace when someone’s fighting an addiction; it’s something many deal with on their journey to success. Yet, Psychology Today[1] records that more give up addictions than those who stay addicted, or who constantly relapse. This should give us hope, and help stave off discouragement. Also, relapsing…
Understanding Relapse — Survivors Blog Here Mental Health Collaborative
Meet Beyond My Battle, For Chronic Health, Disability And Caregiver Support
I was contacted by Angelina Valente after seeing my Organization That Can Help page asking if I would add Beyond My Battle to the list. I spent some time this morning looking over their website and was amazed at the support offered for people with Chronic Health Conditions, The Disabled, and for Caregivers. I wanted to do more than add to the list, I wanted to make sure you knew about the organization.
Here’s a little about Beyond My Battle
Cultivating resilience and reducing the stress of illness and disability through contemplative practice.
It isn’t uncommon to have a physical illness or disability. In fact, more than 155 million Americans live with a chronic illness, 61 million have a disability, and 25 million live with a rare disease. Also common is the overwhelming stress that comes with adapting to and managing any life-altering medical condition.
For someone living with a disease or disability, stress can further jeopardize health and strain needed relationships. For caregivers, stress leads to burnout and compromises emotional availability.
Research reveals that the way one copes with stress determines how it impacts their physical and emotional health, where an engaged approach results in higher levels of well-being and acceptance. Our programs foster engaged coping through contemplative practice and community engagement, an approach well-documented in reducing stress and cultivating resilience.
Our vision is to provide patients and caregivers with a unique model of support for life with health-related uncertainty.
Each month they offer Virtual Retreats for a small fee and the vast majority of the resources are free.
Free Online Support Groups
Creative Meetups
Online Community
E-Books
E-Toolkit
Library
and the Unfixed Podcast
Listen to the Unfixed Podcast
Beyond The Battle is a non-profit organization. All donations are welcome.
Please check out the wealth of resources that Beyond My Battle has to offer.
Melinda
What Your Body Needs To Stay Healthy-Sleep
Did you know that sleep or lack not only affects your physical health but your mental health as well? Our bodies need time to regenerate from those long days at the office and the stress of life. Just how much sleep we need is different for each person and it’s important to know how many hours of quality sleep you need.
How much sleep do we need?
In general, the average healthy adult needs 7 to 9 hours of sleep per night. Experiments have demonstrated that the average amount of sleep needed to avoid detrimental effects on daytime function is about 8 hours and 10 minutes. It is recommended that adults beyond age 65 may need less sleep, averaging 7 to 8 hours instead. If excess time is spent in bed, insomnia will result.
Effects on mental health
- Irritable
- Lack of concentration
- Reasoning
- Alertness
- Problem-solving
- Anxiety
- Depression
We know that we feel better after getting a good night’s sleep. The trick is how do we set ourselves up for better sleep.
Tips for Better Sleep
Good sleep habits (sometimes referred to as “sleep hygiene”) can help you get a good night’s sleep.
Some habits that can improve your sleep health:
- Be consistent. Go to bed at the same time each night and get up at the same time each morning, including on the weekends
- Make sure your bedroom is quiet, dark, relaxing, and at a comfortable temperature
- Remove electronic devices, such as TVs, computers, and smart phones, from the bedroom
- Avoid large meals, caffeine, and alcohol before bedtime
- Get some exercise. Being physically active during the day can help you fall asleep more easily at night.
What to do if you can’t back to sleep
Stop watching the clock
Try relaxing your body
Find an uninteresting activity
If you haven’t fallen back asleep in 15-20 minutes, get out of bed.
Chronic insomnia affects up to 15 % of adults, and many don’t seek treatment for it.
A couple of years ago I realized that my mind was still reeling when it was time to go to sleep and I was too jacked up to fall asleep. I set out with a simple plan to spend an hour before bed shaking off the day. I’m much better for the time put in on the front side because now when it’s time for lights out my mind is ready. Here’s a post on my nighttime sleep routine. What I do leading up to sleep time is important and can make a difference in getting a restful night’s sleep.
Melinda
References:
https://www.cdc.gov/sleep/about_sleep/how_much_sleep.html
http://www.sleepeducation.org/essentials-in-sleep/healthy-sleep-habitsExternal
https://www.columbiapsychiatry.org/news/how-sleep-deprivation-affects-your-mental-health
https://www.verywellhealth.com/how-much-sleep-do-adults-need-3015140
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/5-strategies-that-will-help-you-get-back-to-sleep/
10 Ways To Have A Better Conversation
Updated Suicide, What’s Left Behind?
As we wrap up Mental Health Awareness month I wanted to touch on the subject of suicide. It’s not just people with mental illnesses that commit suicide but also those who suffer from chronic health conditions. Each person reaches a level of pain they can’t come back from. Here’s a little of my story.
September is Suicide Prevention Month and I’ve struggled with what to write. I do believe strongly that as a society we have to talk about suicide. As much as I advocate for everything I believe in suicide is something so personal to me that it’s different. It’s not the stigma, I don’t care what anyone thinks about my father’s death. It’s that in order to prevent suicide you have to start so far in advance of the person wanting to commit suicide.
My father abused me and we were estranged from the time I was a teenager. When I lived with my father I knew he was emotionally unstable but I was a kid and had my own problems. After 14 years my father calls me and starts talking about suicide. About how he can’t work, how he doesn’t have any money, and on and on.
The daughter and human in me responded, I was heartbroken, in shock, felt responsible and started paying his bills, sending him money and we talked all the time. He constantly talked about people bugging his phone, and people following him. I didn’t realize at the time my father was delusional.
I continued to beg him every time we talked to not kill himself, to think about my granny, his mother who would be devastated. I talked and pleaded for months. Begged him to go to the doctor. I did what I could.
I got a call late one Sunday saying “your father did away with himself” from my gramps. I was in such shock I called right back and asked was he dead or on the way to the hospital. No, he’s dead.
Here are a few things I learned after my father died.
He had been in a downward spiral for years by looking at his living conditions. He had boxes and boxes of cassette tapes by his bed, recordings he had made. I remember him talking about someone bugging his phone so I listened to every one of those tapes several times. There was nothing on most of them, some were recordings of my father talking on the phone. Some were just noise or his breathing. My father was delusional.
I could go on and on but there are a few takeaways.
One of the most difficult things you have to deal with in a suicide death is a closed casket funeral. You can’t see their face and say goodbye so there is an unmet emotional void that never goes away.
I did everything within my power, my dad was a grown man. A man of his own free will. I could not make him go to the doctor for help. There wasn’t a Gun Law in Texas where you could call the police and they would come out to take away a gun. There may not be one now.
I felt unbearable guilt, the pressure of the weight of thinking I could have prevented my granny’s pain was so much that I drank myself crazy.
What I did learn from his death as we had the same mental illness, Bipolar Disorder, I was 75% more likely to commit suicide because of it. I took that information and I found the best Psychiatrist I could find. He is still my doctor today and has saved my life many times.
You can’t stop someone from killing themselves if they are determined. They will find a way now or later.
What we can do is look for signs early in life and during a crisis to see if a person needs help and guide them in that direction. If you’re a parent you have much more control when your child is younger.
The key to preventing suicide is to bring all the emotional damage to the surface to be dealt with and treat mental illnesses in a responsible manner the best we can. I will also add that if you’re inclined you can push for laws that allow the police to be called and for them to take the gun away for some period of time. Each state is different. You can also push for stronger gun laws if that is your wish.
Melinda
Blogger Highlight-Peace of Life Today
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week I highlight a new blogger, Peace of Life Today.
peace of life today
Taking Control… Learning Contentment
My name is Lisa and two of my major passions are in the area of health (fitness and nutrition) and money (budgeting and planning for the future). I am blessed to be able to do budget coaching as part of my job and find it unbelievably rewarding to be able to help people see money in a new way, and reprioritize was is most important.
Ironically, money and health are the two biggest concerns for many people. They are linked together very strongly and can effect every area of our lives, including work and relationships.
Melinda
Book Review Mind Over Mountain-A Mental and Physical Climb to the Top by Robby Kojetin
I want to send a special thanks to Laura Sebright at Tigger Publishing for sending me Mind Over Mountain-A Mental and Physical Climb to the Top by Robby Kojetin to review.
About the Author
Robby Kojetin lives in Johannesburg, South Africa, and is a high-altitude adventure. Since his accident in 2006 which resulted in him breaking both of his ankles, he has gone on to become one of only a handful of people to have stood on top of the world’s highest mountain, Mount Everest. He has also climbed Kilimanjaro nine times, completed the Ironman triathlon, and scaled five of the Seven Summits. Known as an inspirational and engaging speaker on stage, he presents on the topics of failure, self-doubt and persisting against all odds, in the hopes of inspiring people of all ages and backgrounds facing the daunting mountains and obstacles in their own lives.
Robby is a proud husband and father who also coaches people to reach their personal summit goals. He is a regular contributor to a number of radio programmes, magazine articles and TV features, including DiscoveryChannel’s Everest: Beyond the Limit.
Blurb
A simple mistake at an indoor climbing gym sentenced 28-year-old Robby to a year in a wheelchair, shattering his aspirations of becoming a mountaineer. In the months that followed, Robby faced depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts and a complete loss of his sense of identity.
But from somewhere deep inside him, he summoned up the strength to keep going even when all seemed lost; he embarked on a monumental journey, a feat of mental and physical strength. His weakness became his power. This story is more than a biography or an account of a mountaineering expedition – it showcases the human spirit and shows us all how it is possible to rewrite the definition of what is possible. From those dark days, Robby has become the embodiment of perseverance and possibility, overcoming the odds to join the handful of people who have summited Mount Everest.
One reviewer said “I laughed, I cried, got angry at why something so terrible could happen to someone so good, but most of all I was in awe of what Robby overcame!! A must-read for anyone!!”
My Thoughts
At 22 years old Robby’s identity and self-confidence were tied to rock climbing and all the adventure it brought. He was paving away in a career that he enjoyed that gave him the time off needed to continue his climbing adventures.
Until one fateful day, while practicing on a climbing wall, he jumped off as he had done many times before, the floor gave way causing Robby to shatter both ankles, fracturing several bones and rupturing the tendons from the shin down.
This is a devastating blow to anyone but for an avid rock climber, this could be the end of the adventure. With the love and support of family and friends, Robby concentrates on recovery and walking again. The recovery period is slow, very painful, and takes a toll on his mental health. Some days are dark with no light at the end of the tunnel but he pushes forward.
What Robby does from here is miraculous, not only does Robby walk again but goes on to climb the highest mountain in the world Mount Everest. This book is a fast and very enthralling read. It’s a story of grit and what the mind can allow us to accomplish. I would recommend this book to anyone.
Trigger Publishing
TriggerHub.org is the first mental health organization of its kind. We are bringing mental health recovery and balance to millions of people worldwide through the power of our books.We have built a first-class resource of curated books produced and published in-house to create a unique collection of mental health recovery titles unrivaled in quality and selection. We work with experts, psychologists, doctors, and coaches to produce our books, but we also work with real people looking to share their stories to reach out to others and provide hope, understanding, and compassion. These brave authors also aim to raise awareness of mental health’s “human” face and its impact on everyday lives.
Melinda
The Keys To Maintaining An Active Lifestyle
It’s easy to be active when you’re a kid. After all, it seems that when you’re young, your only mission in life is to run around all day! As adults, however, it’s much more difficult, or at least it can feel that way. While it’s less easy to remain at our active best, that doesn’t mean that it’s impossible. In fact, there are plenty of recommended things you can do that’ll help to keep you active into adult age. In this blog, we’ll run through some of the most effective methods.
Daily Movement
You can’t expect to be active if you’re sitting down all the time. Alas, that’s just what many people are doing, all day, every day. It’s possible that you won’t naturally be given space to exercise because of how busy you are. However, it’s a good idea to try to force it through a little. You’ll find that there are many ways to build little bursts of movement into your day. For instance, you could take the stairs rather than using the elevator. You could cycle to work instead of driving. Even an after-work stroll will keep you up and mobile.
Feed Your Body
Your body needs certain things if it’s going to have the energy levels to be mobile. You can’t just feed your body anything and expect it to work at its full capacity! So make sure that what you’re giving your body is healthy and all-around good for your energy levels. Eat a balanced diet full of all the vitamins you need, and you’ll notice the difference. It’s also a good idea to look beyond the food that you eat, too. Things like HGH therapy and various supplements, such as maca extract, can provide a significant boost to your energy levels. And the more energy you have, the more active you’ll be.
Limit Toxins
We just spoke about giving your body the things that it needs to have energy and be active. But it’s also important to think about not giving your body certain things, too. For example, things like alcohol and tobacco have been shown to impact energy levels over time. And even over a shorter time — no one jumps out of bed when they have a hangover, after all. Look at taking a break from these things or giving up entirely, and you’ll soon find that you have all the energy you need and that your physical performance is much better.
Regular Assessments
Finally, one of the main keys to ensuring that you stay active later in life is to avoid settling into complacency. We’re all creatures of habit, and that means that sometimes, we can slip into detrimental ways of being without fully realizing it. Every now and again, look at reviewing your lifestyle, and analyze whether it’s in line with your health and fitness goals. Taking the time to do this might just be all it takes to make a few changes that really help you in the future.
This is a collaborative post.
Melinda
Stream of Consciousness Saturday #SOCS Prompt is “trail/trial”
Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “trail/trial.” Use one, use both, use them any way you’d like. Bonus points if you use both. Have fun!
Down the trials of lives, we have to take many paths and decide along the way which one to follow. We go with our gut or with facts but we make decisions that lead us down a path. Lawmakers have to decide at this pivotal minute what is the right thing to do, not the trial that is the most traveled but the hard ones, the hardest one that takes courage to cross over to.
We as voters have a path to choose as well when it comes time to vote. Know where your lawmaker stands on gun reform and if they don’t support your beliefs don’t vote for them. It’s time to stop voting down party lines and vote with how we want our country to be led.
There is a middle ground.
Melinda
Here are the rules:
1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing (typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.
3. I will post the prompt here on my blog every Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a particular subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The,’” or will simply be a single word to get you started.
4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours. Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.
5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read all of them! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later or go to the previous week by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find below the “Like” button on my post.
6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!
7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.
8. Have fun!
For more streams, rules, and tips for Stream of Consciousness Saturday, visit our host, Linda at:
Have a great weekend.
Melinda
Common Causes Of Anxiety
You only have to listen to the headlines or read the newspaper to see that anxiety levels are rising and a growing number of people are experiencing stress. In this guide, we’ll discuss some common causes of stress and anxiety and offer tips to help you cope.
Unemployment is one of the most talked-about subjects at the moment, with many people losing their jobs or businesses and others struggling to hang on to theirs. Balancing the books is challenging at the best of times when you’re trying to manage a household or raise kids, but the pandemic has exacerbated difficulties and made staying in the black virtually impossible for some. If you’re experiencing financial strain, or you’ve lost your job, there is help out there. Don’t hesitate to seek advice about incentives or support measures that are available to you during the crisis and look for opportunities to increase your income if your workload is reduced or you’ve lost your job. From Forex Trading, to online courses, blogging to temporary jobs, it’s possible to find solutions, even if they are only a short-term option to tide you over. It’s also beneficial to try and reduce spending on non-essential items and to budget to make your money stretch further and find out about programs that could prevent you from getting into debt in the weeks ahead. Some companies are offering freezes on loan and credit card payments, for example.
Relationships can make or break us. While some relationships lift our spirits and make us feel secure and content, others can have a negative impact. Break-ups are tough and it can take a long time to come to terms with the fact that you’re moving in a direction that is different from the one you expected to take. You might have envisioned spending your entire life with a partner, only to find that you’re now on your own. Take your time to process what has happened and to heal. Lean on the people closest to you and try to focus on the present, rather than the past. Often, relationships don’t work, and once you have a sense of perspective and time has passed, you realize that there was a good reason for parting. Let yourself feel and experience emotions and don’t put too much pressure on yourself to get on with life, start dating or stop feeling upset about the situation. Move at your own pace. Everyone copes in different ways and there is no right or wrong way to deal with relationship breakdowns.
Do you feel like you’re swimming against the tide, or do you dread the alarm going off every morning? It’s rare to find a job you enjoy every minute of every day, but work shouldn’t be a source of severe stress or anxiety. If you are feeling under pressure, or you’re struggling to switch off, talk to your boss about your workload, address issues that are getting to you and take some time out. It’s crucial to have a balance and to enjoy downtime. Learn to say no. If you’re already working too many hours without pay, or your to-do list is endless, don’t take on more work or sign yourself up for extra commitments after work. Rest, relax and look after yourself.
Stress and anxiety are rife at the moment. If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. There are myriad causes, but help is available. Don’t hesitate to reach out and try and take care of yourself as best you can.
This is a collaborative post.
Melinda
Guilt is the Shadow in the Mirror
May is Mental Health Awareness month and I wanted to share a post written in 2015. Suicide is one of the reasons we need awareness, it can happen to anyone, with or without notice.
All he said is your daddy has done away with himself. I screamed then said I’m on the way. Calling right back to ask were they sure he was dead? Yes. I think years of abuse left a permanent hole in my heart. I go there to do actions requiring no emotions. It’s like autopilot, it has served me well. I started to think about work, and who I needed to call. I’m driving with emergency lights on going 100 mph calling my work team. I stayed on autopilot until I pulled up to my grandparents.
Estranged since a teen, I thought it odd when he started calling. He sounded delusional and extremely paranoid. Nothing made sense, he was not talking in sentences. I pieced together he didn’t have any money and couldn’t work. Why he could not work must have come from the madness.
I would do anything to avoid my granny being hurt. I paid his bills. Over the next several months the phone calls were my hell on earth. He would threaten to kill himself and then go off on what didn’t sound like words. I couldn’t make out anything he was saying as he yelled on the phone. I would keep trying to redirect him back to our conversation. I did not tell anyone what daddy said. He was mentally ill. It had been years since we talked, maybe this was his norm. I didn’t know.
Everyone sitting on the floor when I entered the door. The first words out of my mouth were what he told me. I felt overwhelming guilt, I let my family down. I knew it wasn’t logical but emotions rarely are. My mind scrambled, my father sexually abused me and I’m feeling guilty. I forgave my father, cut him out of my life, paid bills, and feel guilty.
My grandparents and I went to daddy’s the next morning. The disarray would alert anyone that something was wrong. On his coffee table, his lockbox opened with every card I had ever given him, every school photo. The divorce paperwork to my mother laid on the table, his bible open to Job. You could see tear stains on the pages. The house had papers scattered everywhere, dishes piled up, and everything was thrown around. My father had reached the bottom long ago and no one knew.
I found a shoebox full of cassette tapes from recorded phone conversations. It took seven months to listen to every tape. I would have a couple of drinks, listen and cry. Like a tornado in my head, being in the house my sexual abuse took place, daddy putting 357 mag to my head, being a drug addict, and my boyfriend and I planning how to kill my father. These are the times the hole in my heart is useful. Granny didn’t know about the abuse and went to her grave not knowing. To help my granny cope, I would not cry or show emotion around her. I wanted to piece her heart back together. Holding emotions inside extended my grieving process for a long seven years.
A couple of weeks later the morgue called asking me to pick up the gun. Ring the side doorbell, someone brought the original suicide note, autopsy report, and gun with dried blood. My mind could not prepare for reading the autopsy report. Every detail of how he shot himself. The trajectory of bullets, lobes damaged, bones crushed, and exit wounds.
I believe my father died so I could live. Learning about his mental illness pointed me to my own. Thru ancestry, I connected with daddy’s half-brother and several family members. There were over ten suicides in only three generations and many are now with severe mental illness.
Daddy
1940-1992
Melinda
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH-Change Gun Laws
In less than two weeks over 30 families have been torn apart by gun violence. Two weeks! What the FUCK is going on in our country. You’ve heard by now of the senseless shooting in Uvalde, Texas yesterday. An 18-year-old purchased a semi-automatic rifle, killed his grandmother went to the elementary school, and left behind 19 students and two teachers dead. With several more students in critical condition in the hospital. We may be adding to that number.
How can we find this acceptable? What is it going to take to get to the root of the problem? I’m tired of throwing bandaids on the real issues. GUN LAWS!
I’m embarrassed that one of the Texas lawmakers suggested that more police was the answer. REALLY? More police in schools are the answer? How many shootings have occurred when an officer was on campus?
I’m a gun owner, and I believe that people have the right to carry a gun. People who are responsible to carry a gun, not just anyone. This 18-year-old shooter went to the store and bought a semi-automatic rifle. Why in the hell was this allowed? The person that sold him the gun should go to jail!
I don’t have all the answers but I know that we have to get our lawmakers off their asses and make changes to the law. No one needs a semi-automatic rifle, they are for mass shootings. We have to make guns much harder to get, much more extensive, and longer time periods before buying a gun.
I know there are those who say I want to stomp on their 2nd amendment rights but that is not the case. Taking all guns away is taking those rights away. I want anyone who has a problem with what I have to say, to go to Uvalde and see the carnage left behind. The families are torn apart by what could have easily been prevented. Look them in the eye and make your case. Attend all the funerals and tell me we don’t need gun reform.
Matthew McConaughey is from Uvalde and here’s a snippet of what he had to say.
Matthew McConaughey is from Uvalde
“Once again, we have tragically proven that we are failing to be responsible for the rights our freedoms grant us,” he wrote, in part. “The true call to action now is for every American to take a longer and deeper look in the mirror and ask ourselves, ‘What is it that we truly value? How do we repair the problem?’
“We cannot exhale once again, make excuses, and accept these tragic realities as the status quo.”
He went on to ask Americans to find “common ground” so that they can put an end to mass shootings.
–
How many more lives have to be lost before we force change? What if it’s your child next, your neighbor’s child, your mother, or your husband?
We all have to send a message to lawmakers, LAWMAKERS are the people who get it done. This is not on the President, he doesn’t make the laws. We each have elected officials that are supposed to listen to what we want, and what we need. It’s these state lawmakers that we elect who have to stop playing politics in the aisle and make real change. We have to hold them accountable.
We have to send a message by how we vote.
I’m seething and know when I turn on the news in the next couple of days there will be another mass shooting and another.
The time is now!
Melinda
How Keeping a Mood Chart Changed My Life
May is Mental Health Awareness Month and I wanted to share a tool that helped me better communicate with my doctor about my mood swings and how I was doing in between appointments.
Cleaned up repost from 2014
When I started seeing my Psychopharmacologist almost 16 years ago he intimidated me. He’s not a chipper guy and it took years to see through his shell. I was in a very dark place and spiraling down. I didn’t think he understood how depressed I was.
Psychiatrists are different from therapists in that, they only provide medication management, and appointments are 20 minutes at most. So we had a couple of frustrating meetings. I didn’t know how to reach him, I didn’t know doctor talk. He is one of the best in Texas and finding a Psychopharmacologist is difficult, I wasn’t walking away.
During another frustrating meeting, he left the room to talk to a therapist he worked with. He did me the biggest favor and no doubt saved my life. He suggested I sit down with a therapist to see if she could help me better communicate what was going on. They had worked together for 13 years, and she provided some insight into his personality and how best to communicate with him.
She drew a chart and we talked about how depressed I was. She repeated back to make sure she was on track and then gave me the chart. At that time I was rapid cycling, and adjusting to meds, and didn’t think I was improving. The Mood Chart brought our communication on the same page. I liked the log because it gave me an opportunity to show how I was cycling or any other significant change. I took out a journal and started keeping a daily log of the chart and any info about my state of mind. It gave me an opportunity to see exactly what was happening at any given time or day and look for trends, triggers, and side effect notes.
I want to share the chart for those struggling with their mental illness or who have trouble communicating with their doctor.
Once we were on the same page, he was able to give me the help I needed. I would suggest a larger sheet of paper to give room for notes.
My chart may look different than yours since I discovered my normal was actually below the normal line. You basically draw a line down the middle of a piece of paper. The line is normal mood. Then you track 1-10 above the line or below the line. Mine is not the best example but it’s the only one I kept.
I would track 1-10 below the line if I was depressed and 1-10 above the line if I was feeling good or high. I would also write some notes in there to help describe the mood or feelings at the time. There are some mood charts online that you can print off that might help.
Tracking my moods gave me a way to spell out exactly what I was going thru with documentation that helped me answer questions from the doctor that I may not have remembered otherwise.
Melinda
National Military Appreciation Month
May, marked officially as Military Appreciation Month, is a special month for both those in and out of the military.
Introduced in 1999 by Sen. John McCain and honored every May, Military Appreciation Month encourages Americans to reflect on the sacrifices made by soldiers, sailors, and all current and former military personnel.
Not only do we pause on Memorial Day to remember the sacrifice and service of those who gave all, but the month also holds several other military anniversaries and events, including Military Spouse Appreciation Day and Armed Forces day.
The American military was founded even before the country itself. To fight the British and gain independence for the future United States, the Continental Congress created the army in 1775. After winning the Revolutionary War, the Founding Fathers didn’t intend to have a standing army. They disbanded the Continental Army and called for the “well-armed militias” that have become a flashpoint in today’s debate over the Second Amendment.
Today, the U.S. military is the world’s largest employer, with close to 3.5 million personnel employed in one way or another. The U.S. Department of Defense hires more people than any other organization or corporation in the world. By contrast, Wal-Mart, the largest private company, has 2.2 million employees worldwide.
I have to utmost respect for every person who joins the military, every role is vital and that love and respect extend to the families. We would not be America if it weren’t for our military, we wouldn’t be a respected world leader and we wouldn’t have the power to help others in need.
My gramps was a WWII veteran and one day while going thru some of his military paperwork I discovered he was awarded a Bronze Star. Gramps never talked about his time in the military so it was no surprise that I had no idea what awards he had. I ask him where his award was and he went into the garage and pulled it out of his toolbox. Grunge and all, there it was. I felt such pride and my gramps just brushed it off and said everyone got one of them. I knew better and after his death, I discovered many more metals he was awarded during his time serving our country.
When gramps died we were at the height of the war, and Ft. Hood was stretched very thin. I wanted a military funeral service and they weren’t sure anyone could come. I was shocked the day of the funeral, four soldiers arrived. At the end of the service, two of them folded the flag with gentle and respectful hands and then handed it to me. I felt such pride for my gramps, the four soldiers there that day, and to be an American.
Melinda
References:
Blogger Highlight-Creation of a beautiful life
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week I highlight a new blogger, Creation of a beautiful life.
Creation of a beautiful life
Placing the focus on self-love, self-care, and the pathways that lead us to happiness
Hello my dear readers! Thank you for your interest, not only in my site but in knowing a little about me. My Name is Tiffany Wade. I’m a very happy wife, a lover of books, writing and creating!
I’m still exploring my pathway of self-love and care. And by sharing my thoughts and insights, I hope I may be able to help encourage and strengthen others along their path as well. Each of our paths will be unique and different, but our goal of self-love and care we have in common.
Melinda
Book Review Yes, You Can Talk About Mental Health At Work by Melissa Doman
I want to give a special thanks to Laura Sebright from Trigger Publishing for sending me the book, Yes, You Can Talk About Mental Health At Work By Melissa Doman for review.
256 pages
About the Author
Blurb
This timely and practical book is for any employee, manager or leader who wants to understand mental health at a deeper level, and learn how to talk about it really well in the workplace.
Taking a realistic approach through research, stories of lived experience, and applied techniques that anyone can use, this approachable book covers a variety of crucial areas, including:
- How we bring our beliefs and experiences around mental health and mental illness into the workplace
- The importance of understanding how the language we use, consciously or unconsciously, impacts our interactions with others
- Ways to manage the challenges around having mental health conversations at work
- Step-by-step ‘how-to’ conversation guides, alongside practical tools
- Concrete tips on ways to action this education, individually or at a team level
After reading this book, you will feel empowered and equipped to have constructive, meaningful conversations about mental health in your workplace.
My Thoughts
Talking about mental health at work is not something I’ve ever felt comfortable with, even with my most trusted managers. I spent my career battling mental illness yet told no one, it’s not just the stigma around mental illness but the fear of the information being held against you in some way.
This book is a great tool for anyone who manages people on how to keep the lines of communication open and create a comfortable work environment.
Everyone faces a mental health challenge at some point in their life, and it affects our entire life including our work life. Some conversations are easier than others and having a tool to help prepare you for those sensitive subjects is critical to being a good manager.
Melissa takes her real-world experience, gives you a step-by-step guide on conversations you may encounter, and provides you with the tools to have deep meaningful conversations about mental health in the workplace.
This is a must-read for every people manager, from the start of your career to being a veteran manager.
Trigger Publishing
TriggerHub.org is the first mental health organization of its kind. We are bringing mental health recovery and balance to millions of people worldwide through the power of our books.
We have built a first-class resource of curated books produced and published in-house to create a unique collection of mental health recovery titles unrivaled in quality and selection. We work with experts, psychologists, doctors, and coaches to produce our books, but we also work with real people looking to share their stories to reach out to others and provide hope, understanding, and compassion. These brave authors also aim to raise awareness of mental health’s “human” face and its impact on everyday lives.
Melinda
Everyday Magic 5/22/2022
I’m so glad you are enjoying Everyday Magic. I find it a good place to wind down and ask some important questions.
Bella and Grace by Stampington
To really live life to its fullest, it’s important to be able to see the beauty in things where others do not.
What unconventional things do you find beauty in?
Enjoy your day!
Melinda
Stream of Consciousness Saturday #SOCS Prompt is “clear”
Today’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “clear.” Use it any way you’d like. Enjoy!
Today the prompt is a good one, clear. I’m not thinking clear after weeks of poor sleep. One thing I remember growing up was being able to sleep late on weekends. My granny would let me sleep until 11:00. that was a good thing because any earlier I would be a monster and probably have a monster hangover headache. But I digress. She would come in to wake me up and say I don’t know how you can lay there that long my bones would hurt me. I thought that was silly and she was giving me a hard time for being lazy.
Fast forward to 58 years old, now my bones hurt. Not after a night’s sleep, not even four hours of sleep but every two hours. I have to wake up and move the dogs around which gets them grumpy and after I get settled I’m wide awake. Then two hours later it’s the other hip or shoulder and it’s time to repeat.
This has gone on night after night, for the last year since I stop taking pain medication. What is clear to me is pain medication is required if I’m ever going to sleep a full night again. I ofter ask while trying to go back to sleep how my granny did it without so much as a Tylenol.
Here’s another take on “clear”, it’s clearly. I’m not thinking that way this morning but look forward to that day. As Johnny Nash says I can see all the obstacles in my way.
Johnny Nash – I Can See Clearly Now
Melinda
Here are the rules:
1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing (typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write. 2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop. 3. I will post the prompt here on my blog every Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a particular subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The,’” or will simply be a single word to get you started. 4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours. Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below. 5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read all of them! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later or go to the previous week by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find below the “Like” button on my post. 6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get! 7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views. 8. Have fun!
For more streams, rules, and tips for Stream of Consciousness Saturday, visit our host, Linda at: Linda G Hill
Have a great weekend.
Melinda
Just Pondering
Bella Grace Field Guide by Stampington
What are five things you can do that never fail to turn your day around?
Melinda
The Most Important “Sexy” Model Video Ever
The Most Important “Sexy” Model Video Ever
http://youtu.be/bOXMKEnra8w
Save the Children gets the point across.
Warrior
Just Pondering
Bella Grace Field Guide by Stampington
Our interests and passions are things that make us unique.
What are some things you’re passionate about that might surprise others to learn?
Melinda
Book Review Love Interrupted, Navigating Grief One Day at a Time by Simon Thomas
I want to give a special thanks to Laura Sebright from Trigger Publishing for sending me the book, Love Interrupted, Navigating Grief One Day at a Time by Simon Thomas for review.
Love, Interrupted: Navigating Grief One Day at a Time Paperback – June 13, 2019
200 pages
Blurb
In his heartbreaking memoir, Simon Thomas (former Blue Peter presenter and one of the leading faces of Sky Sports Football) reveals how grief nearly destroyed him.When Simon lost the woman he had loved for 16 years, the future he’d imagined for their happy family disappeared forever. Just three days after being diagnosed, Gemma died from acute myeloid leukaemia.In Love, Interrupted, Simon is brutally honest about his journey through grief, and opens up about how close he came to ending his own life. Simon didn’t know how to carry on without Gemma; he just knew that, for the sake of his eight-year-old son, he had to find a way…Love, Interrupted is a moving story of love, loss, faith, and family.
My Thoughts
Accolades
‘The most moving book of the year’ Daily Mail’
A brave and candid book’ Metro
Death is a taboo subject but one we all deal with in our lifetime. Simon shares his experience of love and loss, and the will to move forward for the health of his young son Ethan who is eight years old when his mother dies.
His writing is raw as he shares the experience of losing his wife suddenly to cancer and how he navigates the unbearable grief. Simon talks about his mental health during the grieving process and how to help a child deal with all the emotions of losing a mother. It’s a heartbreaking story but one of hope.
Simon and Ethan learn how to build a life and move forward to reclaim their happiness while still honoring his wife Gemma.
This book is for anyone who has lost a loved one or is helping someone who has and is dealing with grief. It’s not a book about dying but one about living, about taking the painful steps forward to find happiness again and to provide a stable life for his son.
It’s a fast read and you feel Simon’s pain and loss in a real way. I would recommend this book without hesitation.
Trigger Publishing
TriggerHub.org is the first mental health organization of its kind. We are bringing mental health recovery and balance to millions of people worldwide through the power of our books.
We have built a first-class resource of curated books produced and published in-house to create a unique collection of mental health recovery titles unrivaled in quality and selection. We work with experts, psychologists, doctors, and coaches to produce our books, but we also work with real people looking to share their stories to reach out to others and provide hope, understanding, and compassion. These brave authors also aim to raise awareness of mental health’s “human” face and its impact on everyday lives.
Melinda
Blogger Highlight-Healing Your Heart From Within
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week I highlight a new blogger, Healing Your Heart From Within.
Healing Your Heart From Within
Decided to dance a little deeper in life, and wow can spirit dance!
My search for meaning in life. Going through the ups and downs in life trying to come to terms with that ongoing question that we all have…’is this it?’. And the process I took to finally understand that I’m a package and most of my life I had been playing with the wrapping, not realising that further in was this incredible present just waiting to be held, felt, listened to, understood and integrated into who I was to become. After recognising this part of myself, spirit asked that I put what I had learned somewhere that others may gain from it and help their journey just as I had also been helped to find that present within.
Be sure to stop by and check out his blog.
Melinda
Stream of Consciousness Saturday #SOCS Prompt is “hat”
It’s Saturday again and time for us all to join in Linda’s SoCs. The prompt is week is: Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “hat.” Use it literally or metaphorically. Have fun!
I love hats and my first hat was a football helmet from my gramps for my first birthday. Some would say it’s not a hat but I think it set me on a course of loving hats. Ball caps, cowboy hats, and fedoras are my favorite. I have a large collection and with the weather in Texas, I don’t get to wear them often enough.
The hat I had the most fun wearing wasn’t really a hat, more like a halo. A halo of flowers like mother nature would wear. It was for my Junior Prom and it matched my dress. I got so many compliments and a few laughs but I felt larger than life.
Here’s a photo of a hat I wore in 2019 for another blogger I was trying to cheer up during a very stressful time.
It did make her laugh, she even posted a photo of herself in her favorite hat. Who knew hats were good for your mental health.
What’s your favorite type of hat?
Melinda
Here are the rules:
1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing (typos can be fixed), and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.
3. I will post the prompt here on my blog every Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a particular subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The,’” or will simply be a single word to get you started.
4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours. Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.
5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read all of them! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later or go to the previous week by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find below the “Like” button on my post.
6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!
7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.
8. Have fun!
For more streams, rules, and tips for Stream of Consciousness Saturday, visit our host, Linda at:
Have a great weekend.
Melinda
Book Review My Mind Won’t Shut Up! Meditation for People Who Don’t Meditate by Linda and Marion Williamson
I want to give a special thanks to Laura Sebright from Trigger Publishing for sending me the book, My Mind Won’t Shut Up! Meditation for People Who don’t Meditate by Linda and Marion Williamson for review.
![My Mind Won't Shut Up!: Meditation for People Who Don't Meditate by [Linda Williamson]](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/51I09BbmjOS.jpg)
Published March 2021
107 pages
About the Author
Linda is a senior IT project manager for the NHS in London and has been meditating for 20 years. She’s obsessed with meditation books, retreats, and classes. She reads all the research but still manages to regularly lock herself out of her flat. Marion is an author, editor, and copywriter. This is her 4th book. She edited Prediction Magazine for ten years and works as a copywriter for various websites and magazines. Linda has meditation knowledge and Marion knows how to write books.
Blurb
My Thoughts
This is a great book for anyone who wants to learn how to meditate without all the complicated routines and jargon. What you see is what you get here and it feels good to hear real people who struggle to meditate for all the same reasons we do and how they find a way to fit it into their life.
Linda and Marion show us how to be kind to ourselves and set realistic expectations. Which is a problem in many meditation books I’ve read. They have either way too much information or too hoky poky for me. My Mind Won’t Shut Up is a fun and fast read, one you can easily refer to again and again.
They show us in simple terms how we can incorporate meditation into our daily lives and its benefits.
Some reviews even called this a self-help book because it created positive thinking. I can’t think of a better way to learn how to meditate and would recommend this book to anyone who wants a no-nonsense book on how to meditate.
Trigger Publishing
TriggerHub.org is the first mental health organization of its kind. We are bringing mental health recovery and balance to millions of people worldwide through the power of our books.
We have built a first-class resource of curated books produced and published in-house to create a unique collection of mental health recovery titles unrivaled in quality and selection. We work with experts, psychologists, doctors, and coaches to produce our books, but we also work with real people looking to share their stories to reach out to others and provide hope, understanding, and compassion. These brave authors also aim to raise awareness of mental health’s “human” face and its impact on everyday lives.
Melinda
Repost from 2015 Mother’s Message To Her Child
This is what child abuse looks like. Just like any other parent is what it looks like until you peel the layers back.
Melinda
Original post 1/2015
I found photos of myself starting at birth. As I looked at each photo my mind was asking who could hit this child. I began to sob, continuing to look at each as I grew older. The question of who could hit this child grew louder in my head. People who don’t know me are probably thinking I was crying for myself. The truth is I didn’t think about my circumstances once. I looked at each photo as any child being abused, not even seeing myself in the photo. I knew logically they were me but my mind turns off. I had a similar experience after seeing a news report of a 9-year-old girl abused, starved, and killed by her parents. She died chained to a post on the front porch. I was heartbroken and wished someone could have helped her. There were no tears at home. Several days later I started talking to my Therapist about the girl. I cried, expressing a range of emotions, and it took a few minutes to compose myself. I asked my Therapist if the emotions were suppressed, and I didn’t think so. After 16 years she knows me and explained I feel deep compassion for others.
I read my Baby Book, I wanted to show that abused children and abusers don’t look any different. The parents can say sweet things to cover the abuse at home.
My Mother’s Message To Her Child
To my beautiful young lady. I wish you all the happiness and grace to you. May God fill your life with all his richness and love. May your path be filled with roses and your heart be filled with the pureness of God.
New mothers often write their child’s milestones in a Baby Book. Here is my Mother’s observations and comments mine starting at birth.
Lock of hair from the first cut at 12 months old
The first baby ring at 18 months
Hand and footprints traced, right hand at 8 months and right foot at 3 months
My first toys were a baseball bat and glove from my gramps
I learned to ride a bike at 4 years old
Started walking at 8 months, potty trained at 19 months
Notes: Happy birthday my sweet little kitten, likes to blow bubbles with her food, first school play 5 years old, I was so proud I cried, she has a little temper, she has a big beautiful smile, at 16 months loves music and dancing
The entries stopped but the abuse didn’t.
Updated Random Thoughts On This Side Of Mental Illness
This post was from the 2020 Mental Health Awareness Month and I believe it’s still relevant for Mental Health Awareness Month 2022. I’ve been stable for a couple of years and am thankful for every day that I’m healthy. This is more an opinion piece than a post.
May is Mental Health Awareness Month and mental health has been on my mind more than normal. I come from generations of family members with mental illness including my father who had Bipolar Disorder and eventually committed suicide.
I expect this to be an unpopular post, but that’s okay I want to hear all your comments.
All people have to be held accountable for their actions. The thought that came to mind this morning was a murder case that disturbs me to this day. A woman in Texas drowned all five of her children in the bathtub. She pleaded temporary insanity. I would have to agree she was insane, how could someone kill their five children? She only spent five years in a mental health ward in the prison and was then released from jail. Is five years of medical oversite enough punishment? Is she no longer insane? I think not. I’m responsible for all of my actions regardless of my mental state. She should have been moved to the regular jail system to pay for her murder charges.
My father sexually abused me, was it ok because he was mentally ill? It wasn’t his fault? I don’t buy into that theory. My father never sought help for his mental illness and committed suicide at 52 years old. He made the decision to not seek treatment, at the end of his life he was too sick to see how far down he was. He’ll be held accountable by a higher power than me.
I was nine years old the first time I attempted suicide, it was the first of many attempts throughout my life. As an adult, I educated myself on my illness and have a support system in place. I have to be disciplined in taking my medication, going to therapy, seeing my Psychiatrist, and communicating with my husband or paying the price of becoming unstable.
Mental health matters and people with mental illness need medical help if not for a crisis, for knowledge, and for heading off a problem.
What do you think? Are five years in a mental hospital punishment enough for killing your five children?
Melinda
Blogger Highlight-Beauty From Ashes
Thank you for all the great feedback on the Blogger Highlight series, I’ve enjoyed meeting each blogger and sharing their site with you. This week I highlight a new blogger, Beauty From Ahses.
My journey of healing from Human Trafficking and Domestic Violence
This is my blog where I will write about my healing from Human Trafficking and Domestic Violence. I hope I can help someone know they aren’t alone and spread awareness. I am a mom and an avid reader. I love sunflowers and helping people. I am spiritual and love learning new things!
I have no doubt you will find her blog heartbreaking and inspirational at the same time. She’s very strong.
Melinda
Just Pondering
Bella Grace Field Guide by Stampington
What are three good things you have today that you didn’t have a year ago?
Melinda
lookingforthelight.blog 